by Nicola Haken
Mason released my cock from his mouth with a pop, grinning up at me as he wiped the corners of his lips on the back of his hand.
“Close, huh? I could taste it.”
I crooked my finger, inviting him higher up the bed. He crawled towards me on his hands and knees and then wrapped one hand behind my head, pulling my lips towards his. He kissed me leisurely, exploring every corner of my mouth with his tongue. Our noses kept clashing and I struggled for air, but in that moment nothing could have pried me away from him.
“Do you want me to bottom?” he asked quietly after pulling his lips from mine, leaving them lonely.
“No,” I answered without hesitation. All I could think about while he was sucking me was the feeling of him being buried deep inside me. Just the thought made my hole clench, begging for him.
“And you’re sure you’re ready?”
“I’ve been ready for a long time, tiger.”
Drawing his lower lip into his mouth, Mason plucked a condom and a bottle of lube from the drawers by the bed. I parted my legs instinctively, eagerly, and he nestled himself between them. I stared at his fingers as he smothered two with lube, panting softly as he lowered them towards my arse. He ran them along the crease a few times before delving deeper, circling the tips around my hole. I pushed myself towards him, encouraging him to enter me, and so he did. Slipping first one, and then two fingers into me, he worked them in and out in a slow, steady rhythm.
“Jesus,” I whimpered, bucking my hips and fucking his fingers. He crooked them inside me, massaging my prostate and for a moment I was sure I would leap off the bed from sheer ecstasy. “Faster,” I pleaded. “Harder.”
“You like me fucking you with my fingers?” he asked, twisting and jamming them into me until his palm slammed against the base of my balls.
“Fuck yes I do.” He continued thrusting them in and out of me forcefully before adding a third finger and making me want to scream. “Your cock, Mason. I need your cock inside me.”
Instantly, he tore his fingers from my body, leaving me empty and craving more. Breathing heavily, I watched him tear the corner of the condom wrapper with his teeth, removing the condom and tossing the empty foil to one side.
“Kneel up for me,” he coaxed as he rolled the condom down his thick shaft, but I shook my head.
“No. I want to see your face.”
“Ryder, I know you don’t feel comfortable that way, that you need to be in control, and I’m okay with that. I don’t ever want you to feel pressured into doing something you don’t like.”
“I want to see you,” I reiterated. He studied my expression for a few seconds, seemingly believing my words when he nodded once.
Positioning himself closer to my body, Mason pumped several generous squirts of lube onto his cock, smoothing it up and down with his fingers. Then, taking hold of it in his palm, he guided it towards my hole, nudging just barely at the entrance.
“Just us,” he said, easing himself inside me, his eyes boring into mine. “No one else. Just us.”
The sting lasted only a second or two as he pushed past the resistance, followed immediately by an overwhelming feeling of completeness. He filled me everywhere, not just sexually but my heart and soul – the parts of me that not so long ago I didn’t even know existed.
“Come here,” I said, holding my hand out and reaching for his neck. I raised my knees and he pressed down onto my body, his taut stomach grazing my dick as I curled my fingers around the back of his head. I needed to kiss him as he continued to torture me with unhurried thrusts. “You feel so good,” I moaned against his lips.
“So do you,” he ground out, gradually picking up pace. Kissing me fiercely, passionately, Mason’s thrusts soon turned into hard, fast slams. “Oh my fucking God,” he said through gritted teeth, pulling back slightly to watch his cock drive in and out of my arse.
A familiar tingle initiated in my spine, coursing along my hips and diving straight into my balls, drawing them into my body. My hand wandered down my stomach, unable to resist touching my cock any longer. Seeing what I was about to do, Mason grabbed hold of my hand and raised it above my head. My cock was throbbing, my arse pulsated and my breathing was harsh and rugged.
“Please,” I begged, my voice quivering.
My back arched into the mattress when Mason’s hand gripped my aching cock, his other squeezing my shoulder to support himself. He rubbed me firmly up and down, sending my nerve endings into overdrive. I reached out and touched him, placing my hands on his waist and smoothing them around to his back, needing to feel his hot skin.
“I’m close,” I urged, his tight grip of my cock moving in time with his firm, relentless thrusts.
“I can feel it,” he choked. “Come on, Ryder, let go for me.”
“Oh my…fuck…oh shit, Mason…”
My dick swelled as more blood rushed to the head, making it glisten with pre-cum and threatening to explode at any time.
“Yeah,” Mason ground out. “I can feel your ass tightening around my dick. Oh fuck yeah.”
“Mase, I’m, I’m gonna…I love you!” Those three monumental words spilled from my mouth at the exact moment jets of hot cum sprayed up the centre of my body. Removing his hand from my cock, Mason tucked both of his hands under my arms, dragging me tightly into him and breathing heavily into my neck.
“I love you, too,” he breathed harshly. “So. Fucking. Much.” With one last powerful thrust Mason’s cock began to twitch inside me as he found his release. His words were hot and commanding against my ear and I angled my head to kiss his forehead. Our bodies were warm, sticky from sweat and traces of chocolate. Burying my nose in his hair I inhaled deeply, feeling greater satisfaction, contentment and peace than I’d ever felt in my life.
“So beautiful,” Mason murmured, kissing his way down my neck, along my shoulder and then pressing gentle kisses on each of my scars under my arm.
“I mean it. I love you. That has to be what I’m feeling. I don’t think any other word is powerful enough to describe how much you mean to me, how much I need you. When I’m with you, I feel safe. I feel loved, respected. You make me feel like I deserve that.”
“You do deserve that.”
“And so do you. I just hope I’m able to give it to you.”
“You already do, and you have for so long.”
Closing my eyes, our bodies still entwined, connected, I smiled serenely against his head.
“I’m sticky,” I announced with a soft laugh.
“Me too. Shower with me again?”
“Hold me for a moment longer, then lead the way.”
**********
Kyle King @KyleKingXXX1min
Heading to my home town! See u soon guys!
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Within half a second my phone was on fire. We’d just boarded our flight so I spent the time waiting for everyone else to find their seats and settle scrolling through my notifications.
Darren Simmons @muzzy19841min
@KyleKingXXX Safe trip! Can’t wait to finally meet you :)
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Emma Clark @Emthebabe2min
@KyleKingXXX Enjoy your flight. I’m hoping to get down to see you!
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Michael Fosa @mikef832min
@KyleKingXXX FOLLOW ME!
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Darren Simmons @muzzy19842min
@KyleKingXXX When r we getting more of u & @aarontaylorxxx #KingTaylor
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“Hey, you need to turn that off. Seatbelt sign has just come on,” Mason said, nudging my shoulder. Nodding, I switched off my phone and tucked it into the pocket of my rucksack under my seat. “You nervous?”
“Of flying?”
“Of where we’re heading.”
“Yeah. Just want to get it over with.”
“You know you can still change your mind. You don’t ha
ve to see them.”
“I do. If I don’t I’ll always wonder what could’ve been. I need to know one way or the other if they still consider me their son before I drive myself crazy.”
Saying nothing, Mason wrapped his fingers around my hand, squeezing it gently, reassuringly, as he rested our hands on his lap. The warmth of his touch spread throughout my whole body, settling my nerves and calming my mind. I put my head back on the headrest and closed my eyes, taking a few deep breaths and mentally preparing myself for the days that were to follow.
**********
The time difference completely fucked with our heads when we arrived in the UK and we ended up sleeping throughout most of the first day. Originally I’d planned to take a day to settle in, maybe show Mason a few sights, but as soon as I woke up in our hotel bed I just knew I couldn’t put it off any longer. I could feel the nerves and fear eating away at my insides. It felt like they were gnawing away at my stomach, spreading into my veins like cancer.
“I have to do it tonight,” I declared, turning away from Mason and rolling onto my back in the double bed.
“Tonight? All we’ve done since we got here is sleep. Why not take a day to get settled first?”
“I can’t,” I refuted, shaking my head. “It’s eating me alive. I need to see them.”
“Do you want me to come with you? I completely understand if it’s something you want to do alone.”
“I think it’s best. I’m hoping to leave there with the hope of at least having some kind of civil relationship with them. This all started when I said I was gay. Taking you with me might make them think I’m trying to shove it down their throats.”
“I wish you didn’t have to think like that,” he said solemnly, sighing in disapproval.
“So do I, tiger. But I do. For now at least. I want them to accept me, but it’d be naïve of me to think that’s going to happen straight away.”
“You’re coping so well with all this. I’m proud of you.”
“It doesn’t feel that way.”
“Think back to where you were a couple of months ago. You are coping.”
“I’m scared, Mason.”
“What of?” he asked, concern forcing his eyebrows together as he propped himself up on his elbow to stare at me.
“I’m scared tonight will send me back to that place.” I didn’t want to tell Mason, worry him unnecessarily, but I’d already started to feel that familiar itch. That pain under my skin. The hurt that can only escape through a long, deep cut.
“It won’t, because you’re not alone anymore. I’m here, Ryder. Use me. Talk to me. Share with me. Whatever happens I’ll be taking those troubles on too.”
“I still don’t know if I’ll be any good at that.”
“I’ll know anyway,” he said, trailing his forefinger down my cheek. “I’ll see the distance in your eyes, I’ll notice the way your cheeks don’t move when you smile, and I’ll feel the pain you have in here,” he added, pressing his palm over my heart. “I know you, Ryder. I know how you think, how you feel, and how you pretend. You will not go back to that place.”
“Well I’m going to hop in the shower and leave, so I guess we’ll soon find out.”
Mason took in a deep, ragged breath – his face melting into visible pain.
“Call me, you hear? Keep me updated as soon as you get a chance.”
“I will. I promise.”
“I love you.”
“You wanna know something?” I said after a few seconds contemplation. “That doesn’t scare me anymore.”
Sighing contentedly, Mason smiled and then wrapped me in his arms.
“Good, because I’m always going to love you.”
**********
I felt physically sick as I approached the door to my parents’ house. My dad’s car was outside but that didn’t necessarily mean he was home and as I brought my fist up to knock on the door I hoped that he wasn’t. I tapped my foot nervously against the gravel as I waited for someone to answer. Things didn’t end well last time I was here, in fact I think I yelled something along the lines of ‘You are dead to me’ as I stormed out of the door.
I heard footsteps on the other side of the door and my heart leapt up into my throat. I silently told myself to run in the opposite direction several times but even if I’d wanted to my feet had melted into the ground. After hearing the sound of the safety chain being jangled open, the door started to move.
“Oh, my…Ryder?” my mum asked with a mixture of shock and disbelief in her tone.
“Forgot my face already?” I spat before forcing some deep breaths. I needed to at least try and be civil if this was going to work but damn my parents made it such hard work. “Sorry,” I grudgingly muttered. “I didn’t come here to fight with you. Can I come in?”
“Of course. This is your home.”
“Didn’t feel like that when you kicked me out of it.”
Shit. The whole being civil thing wasn’t going as well as I’d have liked.
My mum stepped aside and I could feel her eyes boring into the back of my head as I walked past her and into the living room. I took a seat on the edge of the brown leather couch, not feeling comfortable enough to sit all the way back, and waited for her to join me.
“Your father…” she began, trailing off as if struggling to find the right words. “He just doesn’t understand. He doesn’t hate you, Ryder.”
“He told me I was no longer his son!”
“Like I said, he just doesn’t understand.”
“Understand what exactly?”
“That you think you’re…you know…”
“Gay?”
She squinted her eyes at the ‘dirty’ word.
“Yes.”
“I don’t think anything. I am gay. I’ve always been gay.”
“Is that why you came back? To have this same argument over and over again?”
“No. I came back because I stupidly thought we could salvage our relationship somehow. You’ve both made it clear how you feel about me, yet I can’t seem to stop myself wishing you’d still love me. How fucked-up is that?” I said, laughing sardonically, mocking my naivety. “But I guess I shouldn’t have bothered,” I added, rising to my feet.
“Ryder no. Wait,” she pleaded, putting her hand on my shoulder. I stared down at her fingers, trying but failing to remember the last time she actually touched me. “Stay, please. I…I’d like to salvage something too.”
Stunned to my core, I sank back into my seat. Partly because I was intrigued by what she might have to say, and partly because I think I would’ve collapsed from shock if I hadn’t. The room was silent for a few minutes, the air thick and uncomfortable. Every so often we would catch each other’s eye, both feeling too awkward to start the conversation.
“So,” my mum eventually began. “How have you been?”
“Up and down. Things are getting better,” I shrugged.
“But you’ve not…I mean…the drugs?”
“No. I haven’t been back down that road. I promise you.”
“Good. That’s good,” she said clumsily, nodding her head. I definitely got my looks from my mum – the dark hair, green eyes and slight frame. My dad was tall, overweight, with blonde, now fading into grey, hair and dark brown eyes.
“I’m sorry I disappoint you both so much,” I muttered, figuring we could either continue with awkward niceties or get straight to the point.
“Oh, Ryder…” she sighed. “He just, we just, wanted so much more for you, that’s all.”
“Like what? A good education? A decent job? Because I could’ve had all that if you’d given me some support. If you’d just accepted me.”
“People…like you don’t get-”
“Gay, Mum. You can say the word. It won’t turn you into a lesbian.”
“Ryder stop it. I’ve no issue with you being gay.”
“Whooooooa…” Her words hit me like a kick to the stomach. “Are you kidding me right now? That is t
he only reason you kicked me out and don’t you dare deny it because we both know it’s the truth!”
“Your father…”
“Fuck Dad! He’s not here so stop referring to him. You agreed with him. You let him throw me out of this house. You didn’t say a single fucking word. So don’t you now tell me that you don’t have a problem with it.”
“It might not be fair and it might not be right but gay people don’t get the same opportunities as everyone else.”
“Oh please. It’s the twenty first century.”
“Your father is a politician. Being gay is something that’s still frowned upon in those circles.”
“He does know he doesn’t have to be gay because I am, right?”
“Now isn’t the time for petulance, Ryder. He’s worked so hard all his life to get where he is. You must understand how he didn’t want that jeopardising? He’s my husband, so of course I supported him.”
“And I’m your SON! You were so worried about what the toffee-nosed arseholes he calls ‘friends’ thought that you didn’t even notice that I’d been…that I was fucking dying inside!”
“Been what, Ryder? Is this about the drugs?”
“Not everything’s about the fucking drugs,” I sneered. “Everything’s about the fact I was fucking raped.”
A choking sound burst from my mum’s throat and I felt the blood drain from my face as I watched it drain from hers. If she hadn’t have jerked back in her chair like I’d just punched her in the face, I would’ve started wondering if I really had just admitted that to her.
“W-when? H-how?”
“Want me to draw you a diagram?”
“Just stop it! Why do you keep being so spiteful?”
“BECAUSE I’M MAD AT YOU! Because I needed you and you weren’t there!”
I had to cut myself off when a wave of spontaneous sobs wracked through my body. Even now a part of me yearned for her arm to fall around me, but of course that didn’t happen, which only made me cry harder.
“Y-you didn’t tell me. How could I have supported you if you didn’t tell me?” she stammered, tears distorting her words.
