“Are you alright?” he whispered, his deep gravelly voice full of concern. I turned to him, knowing I’d see the same thing in his eyes.
I nodded slowly.
“I’m really embarrassed. I’m sorry. Thank you, again.”
“Lily,” he pulled me into his arms, his thick muscles wrapping around me like a warm, protective shield. “Let’s just forget that happened. You deserve better.”
“He’s an asshole,” I agreed.
“Lily,” he pulled away, staring deeply into my eyes and putting his hands on the sides of my face. He looked so solemn. So determined. “Nobody is ever going to hurt you, not as long as I’m around.”
“Lee…” His kiss burned my lips. So hot. Yet so gentle, so light, I almost cried out with desire for more. I wanted him to kiss me hard. I wanted him to kiss away the sight of Brock’s stupid face. And the pain that I saw in his eyes every time he looked at me? I wanted to kiss that away, too - to clean his heart, to make him smile.
But can kisses really do all of that? Or, did that just happen in movies and romance novels?
Only time can really erase the pain, if at all. And yet time was fleeting. And so are opportunities. I may never have this opportunity again, I thought. There are no guarantees.
Lee’s mouth was moving against mine, his body exuding heat, our souls tangled together in an ancient dance, telling a story that had been told countless times before.
Only this time, I was the storyteller.
I pulled away from his kiss, grabbed his hand, pulling him out of the truck, down the sidewalk, through my door, and into the locked sanctuary of my apartment, and finally into the exquisitely blissful isolation.
“Lily…” he whispered, pulling me into his arms again.
I put a finger over his lips and he kissed it.
“Shh…I don’t want to talk. I just…” my voice trailed off, a wave of shyness washing over me. I’d never had the chance to tell a man what I wanted. I found I couldn’t finish the sentence.
“Just what, beauty?” he asked, his voice husky with desire, his cock throbbing hotly between us.
I reached down slowly, brazenly gripping him in my palm like a prize. He groaned, a storm brewing in his dark eyes.
“I just want this,” I whispered, pulling my hand away and resting it on his heart. “…and this.”
“Lily, darlin’ -,” he groaned again, putting his hand over mine. “I can’t. Not yet.”
“What?” I said, my eyes widening.
“Lily, baby,” he said quickly, “I really like you.” He shook his head, running a hand through his hair as he looked up at the ceiling and shrugged slightly. “I mean, I really fucking like you. And I haven’t felt like this in a long time. Well, never actually.”
“Lee, I…”
“No, let me finish. Everything about you is good, Lily. Everything. The way you talk to people. The way you treat animals. The way you walk through the world, caring for everything around you. God, Lily, you look at me like I’m one of the good things, too. And I’m not.”
“Lee, you are…” I tried to stop him, but he kept talking.
“No, Lily. You don’t know,” his eyes darted away for a second, but landed on mine again, his voice full of passion. “You don’t. And I hope you never do. But I’m not perfect, I’m a mess in fact. Hell, I don’t even have a pot to piss in, literally. I have nothing to offer a woman like you.”
“Lee, you don’t…”
“I’ve changed, though. I mean, I am changing, right now, right here, with you, Lily. All this shit I’m going through with my folks, it’s changing me. I don’t want to just fly through life with no purpose. No roots. I want something different. I want a real life, with a fucking white picket fence and two point five rugrats running around that look like me.”
I smiled up at him, my heart in my throat.
“I know I have a long way to go. But I’ll figure shit out. I’ll figure out how to be stable, how to be a man. A real man. With fucking responsibilities. A man true to his word,” he reached out, tangling his fingers in my curls. “A man true to his woman, Lily. I want to be with you.”
“Lee, listen to me!” I interrupted. He stopped and nodded solemnly, waiting.
“I want to be with you, too,” I whispered, my heart singing in my chest.
His smile said it all. The slow grin started on one side, spreading across his face before the other side picked up. His blue eyes dilated as they filled with the hunger I was quickly becoming addicted to.
“I just didn’t want to go too fast, Lily,” he whispered. “I want to do everything right with you. I’ve never done anything right in my whole fuckin’ life…”
“Lee, there’s nothing wrong about this,” I replied, my body on fire with anticipation. “Besides, I don’t care about being right or wrong or going too fast.” Who was I to judge anyway? I wanted him, he wanted me, and that’s all I cared about. As far as I was concerned, there were no rules in love.
Love…was this love? My heart said yes, my body said yes, and my brain screamed at me to slow down, just a little. But slow was the last thing I was interested in.
“I just care about right now,” I continued. “I’m not an innocent girl, Lee. I’m a grown ass woman. A woman that wants you so badly, right here, right now. Tonight.”
His kiss wasn’t gentle this time. And it was perfect. Everything outside of his arms melted away as sharp pangs of desire shot through my body. His hands were everywhere, his body pinning me against the front door, as his kiss devoured my mouth.
It was as if a long restrained beast had finally been released. I opened my eyes, watching him kiss me, his features completely awash with blatant, raw, savage desire. I shuddered under his touch, my body coming alive with its own passionate awakening.
His lips tore away, exploring the skin on my face, my neck, my shoulder blades, his tongue darting down and licking the top of my breasts. I was breathless, speechless, my heart racing so hard my breasts were heaving against him.
“Oh, Lee,” I cried out, as his Stetson fell to the ground behind us and I sank my fingers into the softness of his hair, as his kisses feathered across my skin. “Yes…”
His groan vibrated through my flesh, his lips searing me with hot, frantic, hungry kisses. His rugged hands cupped my breasts, his fingertips catching my hard nipples and squeezing gently. I cried out into the darkness, arching my back up to meet his touch. He reached behind his head, grabbing my hands that were tangled in his hair, and pulling them way up over my head, pinning me harder against the wall, causing my back to arch deeper, my breasts pushed out on full display for him.
Briefly, our eyes collided, the storm brewing between us raging to a feverous pitch. I swallowed hard as his lips crashed onto mine again, kissing me roughly, quickly, before he pulled my shirt down, pulling down my bra with it. My breasts spilled out into his hands, his mouth engulfing my nipple with a savage growl.
“Lee, yes, yes…” I hissed, pressing against him. He devoured the tender flesh, his tongue, teeth, lips, moving against me in a delicious dance. After a moment, he swept me off my feet and began carrying me to the bedroom. He looked down at me, his smile gone, his expression serious, focused and full of exquisite darkness.
“Lily,” he whispered, shaking his head before gently placing me on my bed. What a mess I must have been, my breasts falling out of my top, my curls tangled and falling over my face. “You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”
I would have protested, knowing in the back of my mind that Lee had seen many beautiful women, and I was far from the prettiest. But the look on his face told me this was not the time to argue. The look on his face made me believe him, made me feel so desirable, so wanted, that all my insecurities, all my inhibitions, all my stupid tendencies to put myself down faded away.
I lay back, watching him slowly undress at the side of the bed, drinking in each inch of flesh that became visible like it was a delicious, exclusive cocktail
of masculinity that was mixed just for me.
Lee was everything I ever wanted, all in one beautiful package. His long dark hair, his stormy blue eyes, his smooth, tan, muscular body that rippled with strength and confidence with every move he made.
He pulled open the pearl buttons of his black western shirt, exposing his broad chest, revealing sprinkles of wiry black hair that was just begging for me to run my fingers through it.
Sparks of desire exploded inside of me as I saw the small, dark thin trail of hair that started below his navel and disappeared into the top of his Wranglers. I licked my lips in anticipation, not wanting to interrupt the show, but desperately yearning to run my tongue along that trail, to find the treasure that waited at the end of it.
I watched with glee as he began slowly, teasingly opening his jeans, the excruciating wait for the infamous massiveness I’d heard so many whispers about to come into view driving me crazy. He knew what he was doing. He hesitated, his slow smile spreading across his face as he closed the distance between us and fully opened his jeans at the same time.
His hardness sprang out, unleashed and more impressive than I’d even imagined. He was beautiful. A masterpiece of monstrous proportions. A heroic display of masculinity that I couldn’t wait to get my hands on.
So much so that I sat up, pulling him to me, my hands pushing away his jeans quickly, my fingers wrapping around his velvet hardness, his groan like music to my ears.
I bent my head to taste him, but he stopped me, pulling me quickly to my feet as I whimpered in protest.
“Shh,” he whispered, pulling me close as he kissed me again, his lips moving against me gently as he fumbled with my clothes, pushing them off of me as quickly as he could until we were standing naked in front of each other, our hands sliding over silky flesh as he pushed me back on the bed.
He landed on top of me, the weight of him so welcome and delicious as he kissed me deeply, his kiss so hungry, so needy, exploring my mouth so deeply, our souls seeking a connection that can only be found in the darkness of the night.
He pushed my thighs apart, nestling between them as our bodies moved together, sliding against each other in a teasing dance. His cock throbbed against my center and I wrapped my legs around his hips, his hardness pressing into me, sliding into me so perfectly, so smoothly, as if it was the most natural thing in the world. As if it was meant to be. As if we were made for each other, our bodies fit together like pieces of the same puzzle, and with each rise and fall of his hips he fit us back together, just where we were supposed to be.
We made love till dawn, tasting each other, sinking into each other, melting together, until there was no separation, no distance, no endings, no beginnings, only two tangled souls dancing together in the darkness until we’d ushered in the pale morning light as one.
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
LEE
The Houston Rodeo and Livestock show is a two week period of complete insanity. There was a little something for everyone. Bullridin’, bronco bustin’, barrel racin’, a huge cash raffle that had once risen to fifty grand by the time it was all said and done. All kinds of blue-ribbon livestock shows of every flavor. Prized pigs, 4H raised goats, llamas, alpacas, sheep. From show ponies to dressage competitions, the list of events went on and on. My family participated every year, and I’d spent many hours experiencing the ins and outs, both behind the scenes and in the spotlight.
I much preferred being behind the scenes.
The spotlight was not for me. I hated all the attention. All the fake bullshit that came along with it all. The forced smiles, the photo shoots, not to mention the nerve-jangling, dangerous competition. Well, that part I liked. Riding the edge of danger always got my dick hard, to put it bluntly.
Today was the first day of the rodeo and I cringed as I watched from afar as Brock played the part of the perfect cowboy. He was a walking stereotype as far as I could see. No wonder they love him, I thought, as I watched the press surround him. He played right into their hands, smiling at the right time and pretending to be charming to all the right people.
And yet he was nothing but a cold-hearted snake.
A crowd formed around him, watching as he posed for selfies and signed pictures of himself, a perfect specimen of corporate man-made cowboy.
If only they knew, I thought.
His sponsors stood around him, executives that usually wore three-piece suits but today were dressed up in full cowboy regalia, here to make sure their golden boy performed perfectly. These were the kind of men that thought if they wore a cowboy hat for two weeks out of the year, that made them rugged as all the real cowboys that busted ass every day to be in this competition.
Texas was full of assholes like that. They drove their brand new trucks with completely unnecessary HEMI engines, then turned them in without a scratch the next year for the next new model. They wore their unscuffed boots and their three hundred dollar shirts that were made in Italy or some shit and acted like they were one of the guys.
They’d probably never even shoveled a pile of horseshit in their lives.
I hated pricks like that.
Brock might be a little more real than most of those dudes, but he was an asshole too. That much had already been established. I was hoping like hell he didn’t win. His head was already the size of a prized bull, he didn’t need it gettin’ any bigger.
I watched the spectacle before me with disgust and amusement.
If they knew their golden boy was playing for the other team, they’d drop him like a hot sack of shit. I’d done a lot of thinking about Brock, and from what I could tell, he was just a miserable, closeted, sad dude. I was convinced he just used Lily, and whatever other women he could convince to hang out with him, as a shield to hide who he really was.
It was sad, actually, that he couldn’t show the world who he really was. Unfortunately, not everyone felt that way. A gay man did not fit the image those fake cowboys were trying to project.
“They sure do feed him a big line of bullshit, don’t they?” Jimmy said, walking up beside me and gesturing over at Brock.
“Yeah, and he’s gobbling it up like a fly eats horseshit,” I replied.
“Fame got to him. Rotted out his head. Ate away his heart, till there ain’t nothing left but a shell of a man in a fancy pair of boots.”
I nodded that I’d heard him, but I really wasn’t interested in hearing about Brock’s good side again. Whatever it used to be. As far as I was concerned, if he came near Lily again, there was going to be hell to pay.
My heart swelled as I thought of Lily for what was surely the millionth time that day. Making love to her had transcended anything else I’d ever done. It wasn’t just that our bodies fit together, it was that our souls fit together. I didn’t know how else to describe it, it was fucking magical. She was magical.
She was pure. That’s what I loved about her. That girl didn’t have a bad bone in her body and you could feel the goodness radiating from her. I hoped like hell her goodness rubbed off on me and it wasn’t the other way around. The last thing I wanted to do was dirty her sweet soul with my filth.
I don’t know what I’d done to convince her to let me be near her, but now that she’d let me have a taste of her, I knew I’d never stop needing her. My heart was hers, if she wanted it.
It was still early. In fact, it was way too early - I knew all of this - but there was no way I was going to lie to myself, or Lily, about it. Our connection was strong, undeniable, relentless. And so fucking delicious. I was burning alive just thinking about her.
Unfortunately, her Daddy was standing right next to me, which made things very awkward, considering the thoughts running through my head and just how hard my cock had gotten.
The last thing I needed was him seeing my rock hard erection while we were staring over at Brock Tyler.
Brock Tyler was the last thing on my mind, in fact, the only thing I could think about was Lily, and I had a whole hell of a lot of work to do today. V
isions of her were threatening to get me kicked in the head, if I wasn’t careful. My brain was foggy and I’d found myself dropping shit right and left all morning long.
I was hoping like hell Jimmy hadn’t noticed.
“You doing alright, Lee?” On second thought, maybe he had. I looked over at him, forcing myself to meet his eye. It only made me think of Lily more, because he stared back at me with the exact same shade of green as his daughter’s eyes.
“I’m good, Jimmy. Gonna be a long day. I got most of the horses out of the trailers, there’s three more waiting to be brought out. I’ll get ‘em all settled and watered and then pull all the tack out.”
We’d spent the better part of the morning loading up what seemed like half the shit in both barns and almost all the horses to bring over to the NGR Stadium. It used to be held at the Astrodome. Those were the good ol’ days, I thought, as a wave of nostalgia washed over me. I’d spent my childhood and teen years preparing all year for the rodeo, and once we finally got there, it was always so magical. Bigger than life.
Wasn’t like that so much anymore. Watching Brock turn around and show off his ass as the press took pictures of his Wranglers, I shook my head. The cowboys of my childhood would never have done something like that. Maybe they’d embrace Brock’s gayness after all.
It was all just theatre now. Hell, Brock had probably never really chewed a pinch of Skoal in his life, and they’d paid him out the ass to be their spokesperson.
“Holler at me if you need any help,” Jimmy said. “I can send Lily over, or one of the other guys.”
“Will do, Jimmy,” I said, restraining myself from agreeing to Lily’s help. Lily had other fish to fry. She had to practice. Her competition was tomorrow, and she needed her head in the game, not on me.
Jimmy nodded and walked away, leaving me alone and staring over at Brock’s train wreck again. Part of me wished I was competing against him, so I could kick his ass. The intelligent part of me was damned glad I wasn’t, because my head was so clouded with images of the most beautiful woman in the world that I knew I’d most likely end up on the losing end of a bull’s wrath if I tried to jump on a bull right now.
THE HOPE BROTHERS: The Bad Boys of Sugar Hill Page 37
