by B. D. Gates
I nodded, sighed. The beer had made my eyelids heavy, and I found that I couldn't keep them open for too long a time.
53
Suddenly, Tess was patting my knee, saying my name.
"What, did you get the call?" I asked, my eyes gritty but open.
"No, not yet. I thought you might want to go lie down, go sleep in the bed."
I thought about it. And decided that might be a good idea.
"Do you mind if I take a shower?" I asked, standing up.
"Of course not." She started down the hallway. I grabbed my duffel and followed.
"In here," she said, walking into the master bedroom. "Bathroom's over there," she said, pointing toward the inside corner of the room. "Everything you need is in the cabinet," she said, turning on a softly glowing table lamp, as she took a seat on a small chaise lounge, lovingly reupholstered by Ginnie as a present for her during the renovations.
I dug into my duffel, pulled out some fresh clothes and headed for the shower. I was washed up and dressed in about five minutes. Tess was still on the chaise, looking at her phone.
"So, where do I sleep?"
"Right there," she replied, nodding towards the bed.
"Where are you sleeping?"
"I'm not sleeping. I'm fine, right here."
"Tess, I'll take the chaise, you take the bed."
"I'm not sleeping, you are. Just get in the bed, Bishop."
"Tess, really,..."
"Bishop, just get in the damn bed."
I got in the 'damn' bed. And laid there for about five minutes, not liking that I was leaving her to watch over me. The beer and the shower won out, though, and I must have dozed off.
I don't know how long I'd slept, but I was awake again. Tess was on the bed with me, holding me, gently rubbing my back. I wasn't dreaming. I was laying with my head across her lap, knowing that those moments I'd recalled had actually happened. We really had done this before.
"Tess."
"Yes, Bishop?"
"What's going on?"
"You were crying, you were having the dream again." Her reply was very 'matter-of-fact'.
"Dream? Again?"
"You've had them before."
"And you've done this before."
"Yes. It calmed you down. Do you remember what it was about?"
"No."
"Bishop, who's Jillie?"
My throat closed, hearing her name. I shook my head.
"You don't know?"
I shook my head again. I still couldn't speak.
"You call her name, and you're crying. That's all I can tell you."
I couldn't tell Tess about Jillie, about how I'd watched her leave the foster home that day, dressed in a pink dress, her long blond hair pulled back with a ribbon, being guided to a shiny black car by a woman, her white-gloved hand on Jillie's shoulder. I watched her get in, disappear behind that gleaming door. The man and the woman that we lived with had told me that it was for the best, that I should be happy for Jillie. Jillie was going to have a 'Wonderful Life'.
I was packed off to another foster home two days later.
But I couldn't tell Tess, I couldn't say the words.
Jillie was my sister.
54
Tess was still lightly rubbing my back as I laid there, pretending not to know, lying by omission once again, keeping one more truth from her. I turned and sat up, looked into her eyes as I got up and stood next to the bed.
"Are you okay?" she asked.
"No. I'm not. I'm leaving here, going Hell-knows-where. I'm leaving a life that I've loved, people that I love. Baltimore was where I lived, but this is the first place I've ever...wanted to be. And I should have told you sooner. I love you, Tess, I've loved you all along, I just didn't know how to say it, I didn't know what would happen if I did."
Tess didn't move, at least, not at first. She just looked at me. Then, she got up from the bed, reached out to me, trembling, as she took my hand. Pulling me to her, she kissed me. Softly at first, then harder, moving into me, kissing me again, this time passionately, gently brushing my lips and then just inside my mouth with her tongue. I pulled away as the kiss ended.
"Tess, if we keep on, I won't want to stop," I whispered.
Tess looked at me for a long second. "I don't want to stop," she whispered. She kissed me again, her tongue softly darting inside. Her hands were under my shirt, lightly sliding up my sides, around to my back, the softness, the warmth of them as she caressed me, as I returned her kiss, slipping my tongue into her mouth, surprised at the heat, then the taste of her.
I began unbuttoning her blouse, the soft fragrance of her rising up, enveloping me in the scent I was so familiar with, the one from my dreams. I pulled the blouse away from her shoulders and slipped it off, let it fall to the floor.
Tess pulled my shirt up and over my head in one movement, dropped it onto the floor, then leaned into me. I unhooked her bra, slid it off her shoulders and let it fall down between us as she pressed her warm, firm breasts against my chest. I wrapped my arms around her, gently moved my hands over her back, gliding over the softness of her taut skin.
One long kiss followed another. I tongued her mouth, more urgently, as she moved her hands up from my back and held my head, pushing her hands through my hair, grasping and releasing fingersful as she moved into and away from my tongue, teasing me. Slipping my hands over the soft down of her back, I caressed her as I unzipped her slacks, sliding them and her panties down, letting them fall to the floor.
Tess slipped her hands into the waistband of my shorts, pushed them down over my hips. They dropped to the floor, joining the pile of discarded clothes. I opened the covers of the bed, then followed her into it as she slipped between the sheets. We sank together, wrapping in an embrace that allowed us to touch each other, skin to skin, head to toe.
Cradling her head and shoulders in the crook of my arm, I kissed her mouth, then moved on to her neck, pulling her up against me as I took in the softness of her skin, the taste of it, intoxicating to me, consuming her, imprints and impressions of her to carry with me, away from her, away from Tenley, my free hand stroking her lower back and hip, down the back of her leg, and up again.
My hand still moving, still stroking, I stopped the kisses and looked down at her. Her eyes opened when I stopped, and I gazed upon her face, now mildly blushing from the heat we were sharing. I looked into her eyes, bright and shining, as she searched my face, then locked her eyes on mine. She smiled as she raised up on her elbows and kissed me, answering any questions I had about her certainty in this.
We kissed again, and again, knowing full-well where we were going and what we were doing. Tess returned my kisses with the same passion and intensity and we built on that. My hands rambled over her, exploring, discovering, feeling her respond to my touches. Tess roamed over me the same way, her hands soft, then harder as she adventured, as if she, too, was memorizing me.
Traversing her body, feeling her passion rise as I kissed and petted her, I paused, my hand just outside of the source of her heat, asking to touch her there.
Raising her hips to meet my hand, she nodded, whispering "yes, yes," and I gently spread open her lips and touched inside, amazed by the heat and the wetness. There was no doubt that this was what she wanted, and I pressed against her mound, her clit under my palm as I slipped into her, hearing her quiet moan as she moved to take me in.
She trembled as I gently moved about the inside and outside of her, stroking and caressing. She moved with me, thrusting and retreating as I kneaded her, my fingers inside and the heel of my hand on her clit. Kissing her hot mouth, my tongue softly swirling and sweeping as she kissed me in turn, I felt her respond to me, occasionally changing direction, causing her to quietly moan as she moved with the sensations of each new change in course.
I kissed her mouth and neck, tonguing and sucking lightly, moving along the muscles and just up under her jaw, shifting sides as she turned her head and moved her body against min
e. Swollen, hot, wet, blushing, with a light sheen of sweat, her perfume infused in my skin and the sheets, the quiet sounds of her moans, of her breath making me hotter, I felt her body begin to gather itself for orgasm, and I pursued her with deliberate purpose as she began to thrust in earnest against me, driving me deeper into her, and harder against her.
Tess was reaching her peak, arching upwards and I laid my body down over hers as she started to quiver, push against me, unable to move or to retreat. I held her in place and focused my movements, feeling her tightening around me, hot, wet, gushing. She cried out, gasping, clinging to me, rocking, shuddering, as she came, then came again, under me.
I slowly rocked her down, holding and gently kissing her, not moving anything that would set off a shudder or spasm. Tess was quiet, her breathing jagged, but an occasional moan would escape. I watched her face, her eyes closed, as she collected herself, still stroking my arms and back.
I laid my head on the pillow we shared as I slowly withdrew. Wrapping my arms around her, I pulled her tight against me.
I closed my eyes, committed all of the sensations of making love to Tess to memory. When I opened them, she was looking at me. Lightly brushing her fingers through my hair, she smiled a soft, sweet smile.
"Hey," she said.
"Hey," I answered.
"I'm not dreaming again, am I?" she asked.
I shook my head, smiled. I knew what she meant.
After a few minutes, Tess kissed me then rolled over on top of me, straddled my hips, looking down. She took in the scars, touching one here, running a finger along one there. She leaned down, began kissing me, softly at first, then harder, as she rubbed her hands over my chest and shoulders. Any attempt on my part to touch Tess was met with her removing my hand and holding it down, away from her.
"Do I have to use my handcuffs?"
I laughed. Tess gave me a smirk of a smile.
"Tess," I whispered, looking into her eyes, letting her see my seriousness. "You...don't...have to..."
"Bishop," she leaned down, smiling, her lips close to my ear. "Shut up."
Tess was not shy as she laid down against me, continued to kiss and touch me, on occasion trailing her fingers over me and down between my legs. She lightly brushed the folds with her fingers, marveling at how quickly I became hot, my breathing changing as she began to press inside, spreading my wetness, then sliding around and over my swollen clit, alternating softness and hardness as she passed over it. Her kisses deepened as she took full control of my body, manipulating me in surprising ways.
She found the hottest part of me, the one spot that set me on fire and stayed there, stroking harder, then faster, as I bucked against her hand. I groaned as she bore down on me, sliding her fingers over the head of my clit and around the sides, giving me one of the hottest hand jobs I'd ever had. I was as hard as I'd ever been as I jacked against her. She was lightly sucking, licking my nipples into hardness, much the way I imagined she would my clit, putting me over the top twice in quick succession.
"Waffles! Waffles!" I called out, laughing, pulling her tight against me.
Tess stopped, puzzled, then, "Really? Waffles?" she asked, amused and laughing. "That's your safe word?"
We laughed as both of us, now very sweaty and totally spent, collapsed where we were. As we began to cool, Tess pulled up the bedclothes and laid back, reclining on the pillows, then rolled me over onto her as she rubbed my back and arms, softly kissed my head. Sleep was coming fast.
And I realized this was 'Home' to me, that I had laid like this with Tess from the beginning.
Just as I fell head-long into the orgasm-induced sleep, I heard her whisper.
"I love you, Bishop. I'm so sorry I hurt you."
55
Tess held Bishop to her, absentmindedly stroking her back as she relived the last hour. It had been everything she'd imagined and more--hotter, intense, satisfying--than any experience she'd ever had. Not that she'd had that many, that is.
There was Jackson, in high school, where the only place he 'fumbled' was in bed with her. Sex with Jackson was a series of activities that left her unfulfilled, left her feeling empty and alone. Later, it was with Luke, Ginnie and Joe's son, who was better, making an honest attempt to please her, satisfy her, but when he'd leave her to go home, she would actually be glad. Then there was Bailey, an assistant D.A. she had dated for three months, who was the best of the three but such a prick that she really couldn't stand to be around him so she broke that off without an explanation.
Now, Bishop.
Baxter.
Who'd been everything she'd imagined and more. Tess was surprised to find that she had not been wrong, that making love with Bishop was soft and warm, and satisfying. Bishop certainly knew how to make love to a woman, what felt good. Tess stretched out her legs and flexed her toes as her memories began to arouse her again. God, there was no way. She couldn't possibly want more, not now, not after all she'd had just a short time ago.
She took a deep breath as she considered how their lovemaking had surprised her with all that it was, and all that it wasn't. She was amazed by it, and by the woman, the way she felt under her hands, and the way Bishop had made her feel, holding her tight against her, the warmth and the care overwhelming her, her heart beating and opening in a way that it never had before.
Tess looked down, lightly touching Bishop's hair as she contemplated holding her those first nights in the carriage house. This was certainly much better than when Bishop was hurt and having bad dreams.
She only wished they had found their way here sooner.
56
I woke smelling Tess' perfume. It was still night, but I was wide awake and I knew, this time, that I was not dreaming. I laid still, not wanting to wake her, as I considered what had happened between us.
Now that all was said and done, had I done the right thing? I wasn't sure. Maybe we'd gone off the deep end, sleeping together, not that I regretted it, I just wasn't sure that it was what we should have done in this time and place.
Or, maybe it was the best way to say 'goodbye'.
Perhaps it was her police training, or she was a light sleeper, but she woke, not too long behind me. She stretched, arching her body like she had when we had made love, arms above her head. I ran my hand over the soft skin of her belly, feeling her warmth. I let my hand make its own way over her, petting her, stroking her. She laid still, let me wander. I pulled myself up and leaned over her while I continued touching.
In the soft light, I studied her face. She was calm, serene. It was a look I had not seen before, and it made her all the more beautiful. A great warmth opened in the center of my chest and I could feel it spreading through my veins.
I can't deny it.
I love this woman.
I leaned down, kissed her softly on the lips. "Tess," I whispered.
Her eyes still closed, she reached up and kissed me, like I had kissed her, letting me know she was listening.
"I love you."
She softly smiled.
We kissed and slowly began making love again. I felt her heat growing as we kissed, as I lightly stroked her with the palm of my hand.
"I want to taste you," I whispered.
Her response was to moan, push against my hand, and nod, as I continued to stroke her. I kissed my way down her belly, then settled between her legs. Sliding my arms up under her thighs, I raised her up, spread her open. Taking in her scent, warm and inviting, I slipped my tongue inside her, tasted her saltiness.
Oh, she was luscious. I softly growled with my own pleasure as I took more from her. Tess trembled as I let my tongue rove inside, outside of her. When she began pushing towards me, I withdrew from inside of her, moved up, placed my mouth on her so that it fully covered her clit, let my hot breath lightly envelope it. She groaned, moved her hips from side to side.
"What are you doing to me?" She whispered hoarsely.
I grinned, stayed there, as she continued to move under my mouth.
I pressed my tongue to the tip of her clit, then began to swirl around it, still adding my breath to her head. I felt it grow, fill, as I softly sucked in, pulled her into my mouth, slowly rubbed my flattened tongue against her. I continued sucking, felt her engorging, as I alternated with the tip of my tongue stroking her, adding to her heat with the heat from my mouth.
"Oh my god, oh my god," she whispered, tilting her hips up against me, pushing herself deeper into my mouth. Taking in all of her that I could, tonguing and sucking, licking, as she swayed under me, I slipped two fingers just inside her, stroked across the roughness as I gave her head.
"What...what you're doing, how are you doing that?" She was breathless. I steadily rocked with her, locked my arm around her thigh, then slowly stepped up the pace until she was gasping, her strong runner's legs clamping me in place, holding me tightly against her, so hot, lifting and moving me with her as I mixed it all into one intense onslaught, a continuous flow that drove her into a frenzy under my mouth, thrusting and swaying, then shuddering, crying out as she came, hot, wet, under me.
She was still holding me tightly between her thighs, gently rocking, as the orgasmic spasms receded. "Oh, god, I'm sorry!" when she remembered and let me loose. "I didn't hurt you, did I?"
"No, no, I'm fine," I answered, laughing. I laid with my head against her leg as I gathered the strength to move. She was amazing. I wondered if anyone had ever done that for her before.
I asked.
"Not like that," she answered. "Damn, not like that." She shuddered.
"Aftershock," I said.
She laughed.
"Come up here, please," she ordered.
I unwrapped myself from her and made my way to the top of the bed, pulling up the covers as I laid down in her outstretched arms. She wrapped around me, pulled me close.
"That was...just...insane," she declared, kissing me. She was still rocking, but I don't think she realized it. "Just so you know, I think you've ruined me for anyone else."
