by Cindy Miles
“Minus the rum, yes, I agree with all of these,” I answered. “What are you talking about?”
“You’ve fallen for your Dare,” she said quietly. “You little tart.”
I could do nothing but look at her. Blink. Keep silent.
“Gotcha,” she conceded. “Tight-lipped as usual. Right. Well I don’t know about you, but I’ve got a Dare-Meister to meet for drinks at MacElvee’s.” She cocked her head. “So, besides the nauseating grin on your face all the time now, how’re things coming along with Kane?” She wagged her brows. “Reforming?”
“Um, yes,” I stammered. “He’s…surprisingly moving faster than I thought.”
“Josh is picking me up after six,” she announced. “Talk about surprising. I even got him to quit dipping that hideous worm dirt the other baseball players do.”
We laughed, and she tilted her head. “Something in you has changed, Ms. Belle.” The Grinch smile returned. “I find I quite like it on you.”
“Keep it to yourself, why don’t ya?” I teased. “Wouldn’t want to ruin my reputation.”
Murphy twisted a pretend key at her lips. “Safe with me, love.” She studied me. “So, are you still bound for Belle House?” she asked, and ducked her head to look at me. “You can always come home with me, you know.”
I smiled, and it felt genuine. Murphy was indeed a kind soul. “Thanks, Murph, but yes. I’m expected home for Thanksgiving. Lots to prepare and set up for Christmas.” I grinned, and this time it was fake. It felt fake, and it was. I hated it, too. “Family tradition.”
“Gotcha,” Murphy answered. “You know the offer remains open.”
“Thanks, Murphy,” I replied. Then I glanced at my watch. “Oh, I’ve got to run.”
Murphy, who had braided her long lob bangs and had them pinned back, grinned. “I bet you do, love. Where are you off to?”
I turned and headed for the exit. “See you later, Murphy.” I waved.
“Bollocks,” she said behind me.
I wasn’t about to divulge all of my goings-on with Kane just yet. Everything was too new for me. Too fantastic. I wasn’t even sure I was doing the right thing. But as I pulled on the only casual garments I had—my running gear—my thoughts raced at how much I couldn’t wait to get to that park to see him. Just the anticipation of…well, I didn’t know, had me on edge. Pulling on my trainers, I slipped into my running jacket , pulled my hair into a ponytail, and grabbed my camera. Then I was out the door.
Kane was already at the park when I arrived. To my surprise, though, he kept his engine running, leaning against his door with his arms folded over his chest and his legs crossed at the ankles. With my camera strapped over my shoulder, I locked my car and started toward him. He wore a pair of mirrored shades, so I couldn’t see his eyes. But the lines around his full mouth shifted into a smile that was more than contagious. He pushed off then, and started toward me.
As we grew closer, I couldn’t help but smile back. “Hey—”
He walked straight up to me, steadied my head with his big hands, turned it to just the right angle, and covered my mouth with his. Swallowing my greeting. Tasting my lips. Making my knees feel gummy and loose. His tall frame engulfed me, crowded me, and his unique scent of pine and soap and leather swept over me.
“Hey back,” he said once he’d lifted his head from mine. “I’ve been dying to do that all day.”
“Oh,” I said a little breathless. He was still close, and I could see myself in his shades. I glanced down and noticed he wore a small round silver medallion. I lifted it, and it felt cool beneath my fingertips. I looked at him. “A compass?”
Looking down at me, he nodded. “Brax gave it to me for my twenty-first birthday,” he answered. “So I’ll always know how to find my way.” He laughed lightly. “I suppose he’s still waiting on me to do that.”
Such a profound gift between two brothers. I didn’t know what else to say, so I just nodded. “Why is your engine running?”
That smile took over his face again, and he inclined his head. “It’s a surprise. Let’s go before we lose light.”
He walked me around, helped me up into the truck, and then closed the door once I’d buckled in. He jogged around the front and hopped behind the wheel.
As he pulled out of the park, I half-turned in my seat. “How is it you know so many places around here and you’re not even from the area?”
Kane laughed, and I found I really liked how smooth the sound was. “Olivia knows all the great places,” he answered. “It’s not far.”
“I like it better when you’re not wearing glasses,” I confessed.
Kane immediately slid his shades off and looked at me. “And why’s that?”
I shrugged, a little embarrassed. “Like I said before. You speak with your eyes.” I gave him a smile. “When they’re covered up I feel like I’m not really seeing you.”
A slow sly smile captured Kane’s mouth as he looked straight ahead. “You like my eyes, don’t you?”
Heat burned my cheeks. “Well, of course I do.”
Kane chuckled and in the next second we were turning down a long dirt drive. A small sign was nailed to a tall pine that read HANCOCK PRESERVE.
“Olivia said there is a nice lake back here. Wildlife.” He slid me a glance. “Thought you might find some good subjects to photograph.”
“I didn’t even know this was back here,” I said slowly, taking in the scenery that literally popped into view. Tall pears still retained most of their leaves, and they were every shade of red and yellow and ginger and in between. A nice-sized lake set down the hill from a narrow walk path.
“Well let’s see what you can find,” Kane said, and together we started down the path toward the lake. He held my hand as we ambled down the dirt path, and at the bottom, I immediately saw several subjects.
Wordlessly, I squatted close to the water and shot several of an old boat that had been turned upside down on the bank. A bird. A squirrel. At the far end of the lake, two men fished off the bank. I took several shots of them, as the waning afternoon sun caught them in just the right light.
“Can I try?” Kane asked.
I handed him the camera. “It’s an older model, and I’ve got it on manual focus,” I said. “And, well, you know how to focus. Then you press this to shoot.” I showed him the button, and he nodded. He held the camera up and looked at several views before pointing the camera at me.
“Hold still,” he said, and I hid my face. “Harper.”
I sighed and removed my hands and looked at him, and he focused and took the picture. Then he smiled. “Even more beautiful in person.”
“Stop it,” I said, and retrieved my camera.
We walked until the sun dropped behind the tree line, and I took several pictures—including one of Kane that he hadn’t known I’d taken until the camera motor clicked. He just looked at me and grinned. Shook his head.
“Well if that didn’t break the lens nothing will,” he said with a grin, and threaded his long fingers through mine. “Why don’t you pursue photography if you love it so much?”
“Well,” I said, and that cagey feeling fell on me. The one that occurred when anything ever came up about my family. “Law is…sort of expected of me. The family business, I guess.”
Kane looked down at me, and his eyes seemed pure black in the waning light. “Do you always do exactly what your family tells you to do?”
“Yes,” I answered. Didn’t even hesitate. “I mean, it’s a good career choice.”
“Hmm.” He studied me as we walked now. “Remember our betting game?”
“Yes,” I answered again.
“Okay, here goes. Was Winston your idea, or your family’s?” he asked.
We continued climbing the path, back to where we left the truck. Kane now walked behind me. “Well,” I said, trying to figure out a way to phrase my choice of Winston without flat out lying. I just couldn’t. “Collectively both,” I finally said. “It…was the
right choice.” We reached the top, and he rounded on me, and I looked up to him. “But I’m really glad,” I said. And I truly was. “I like Winston. It’s a good school.” And far, far away from Belle House.
Kane’s dark gaze studied me for some time. “Now that part I believe,” he said softly. His knuckles lifted to graze my jaw, and he lowered his mouth and brushed his lips against mine. He lingered there, stilling against me, just breathing. When he pulled back, his eyes sought mine. “I feel that there’s something hiding inside of you,” he said gently. “And that someone else put it there.”
I could do nothing but look at him, breathless. His alabaster skin, void of all blemishes—just those long, long eyelashes and coffee colored eyes.
“I aim to set it free, Harper,” he said, then kissed me again.
I exhaled, and he swallowed it in, drew me into him, and for once in my life I wished to God he really, truly could.
Rescue me.
It wasn’t until later that night, after Kane had dropped me off at the park and he’d gone about his business, and I was lying in bed, that I scrolled through the pictures I’d taken that afternoon at the reserve. When I came to the one Kane took of me, I stopped, amazed. Wide eyes stared into the lens. Wide, soft, and shimmering. Not quite as alien as I’d thought in the past. A small tilt to the corners of my mouth eased my features. I knew the transformation was because of who was taking the picture. It stunned me.
I scrolled some more, until I came across the ones I’d captured of Kane. Those smoky eyes stared back at me in a way no one else ever had.
And when I set my camera aside, and closed my eyes, I still saw him. Saw those eyes. And recognized in him just what he said he recognized in me.
Fear.
It was the day before classes let out, and Kane’s words from the reserve had haunted me ever since they’d left his mouth. Just as his kisses had. His touch. His sincerity. And his perception. I couldn’t stop thinking about him. Was he real? And would I ever trust him enough to let him know the truth about me? It was all so confusing. So…frightening. Why would I trust someone who was planning on leaving? Why was I setting myself up for a hurt I’d never experienced?
I stretched my legs at the Covington recreational park as I did nearly every morning of my life. This morning was cold; my breath floated out of my body in white puffs. I snugged the knit hat over my ears, did a few body twists. The air sank into the fibers of my fleece jacket and stung my skin. I shoved my hands deep into my pockets.
“You’re not starting without me, are you?”
I jumped at Kane’s voice, but it was quickly replaced by the slamming of my heart and sharp intake of my breath. He’d parked on the other side of the pond and had jogged to me. Right now, his steady gait carried his long legs and muscular frame directly to me, and he didn’t stop until his hands had cupped my face on either side, and his mouth had found mine. I couldn’t get used to his kissing; I wasn’t getting enough. His hands moved from my face, to my waist, and as his lips warmed against mine, he pulled me closer. My arms had escaped my pockets and now encircled his neck.
Almost like I knew what I was doing.
I didn’t.
He suckled my bottom lip, and the sensuality of it had adrenaline humming in my ears. When I looked up at him, into that flawless face and coffee eyes, my knees felt soft. I was glad he still had ahold of me.
“I’m pretty sure I’m going to go insane over the holidays. Are you sure you won’t come home with us to Olivia’s for Thanksgiving?” he asked. His dark brows, perfectly arched, peeped out just below the black beanie he’d pulled over his head. “You know your secrets are safe there.” He wagged those dark brows. “Endless kissing.”
A smile tugged at my mouth. “Tempting. But,” I sighed, stared away from his wise eyes before he saw something else I didn’t want him to. “I have to go home, Kane.”
For the very first time since, well, as long as I could remember, I felt compelled not to go home. It was scary, admitting that I’d rather be with Kane. We hadn’t known each other for long—we really didn’t know each other at all. Yet I couldn’t deny the attraction, the pull I felt toward him. Instinctive and raw, I felt it just as strongly as I felt my own heart beating.
Again, his temporary status, not to mention his sketchy occupation, dropped a dose of reality back in my lap. I couldn’t not go home, though. I was expected. I had no choice in the matter, really.
His mouth swept mine once more, and I breathed him in. Piney soap and clean shampoo. He made me lose my train of thought.
“All right, well, can I call you?” he asked.
We began to lope, making our first lap around the pond. “I would like that.”
“Can I see you before you go?” he asked.
I threw him a glance, and noticed we both puffed out white clouds of air as our warm breath mingled. “I’d like that even more.”
We finished our run, and it was easy for me to imagine Kane McCarthy existed on a different plane than he really did. One where I didn’t have to hide seeing him. One where he didn’t have a shady occupation. And one where we spent the holidays together. It was a novel idea. Novel and very, very dangerous to engage in. He held my jaw with his hand, tilted my head, and claimed my lips with his. His mouth settled over mine, and its sensation was addictive; I wanted it all the time. Another danger, I thought.
“Not to scare you away or anything,” he said, “but I’m going to really miss you, Harper Belle.”
I felt the blush creep over my skin. “I’m going to miss you, too, Kane McCarthy.”
And I wished like anything that I didn’t have to leave.
* * *
I’d just finished packing my overnight bag when my cell phone vibrated on my nightstand. It was a text from Kane.
KANE: WHERE/WHEN TO MEET? I’M DYIN OVER HERE. AND STARVED.
I grinned and sighed. I could hear his accent, even in text message. He seemed so genuine. So sincere. Dangerous, yet…not. I thought about it.
ME: RIDGEVIEW RESTAURANT. JUST PAST COVINGTON. LOOK FOR THE SIGN ON THE RIGHT. YOU CAN’T MISS IT.
KANE: IN 30?
ME: RACE YA THERE :-)
KANE: YOU SMILED AGAIN. I LIKE THAT. SEE YA IN 30.
I dropped my phone in my small leather bag, inspected my room one last time. I counted the money I’d taken from my money box to be sure I had enough, and smoothed my tailored suit before shouldering my meager overnight bag, locking my door, and descending the steps from Delta House. The other girls had already gone; Murphy left the evening before. There was always an eerie silence about campus prior to holidays, when all of the students had left. A deafening calm that almost made my ears ring. Ghostly almost.
Sometimes, I wished I could just stay behind and enjoy it.
Setting my bags in the back seat of the Lexus, I started the engine, glanced once at Kappa House, and headed to the main gate. Soon I was halfway to Covington.
Kane had beaten me to the restaurant, and when I pulled into the mostly-vacant parking lot, he was leaning against his truck. Shades covering his eyes. Leather jacket. Worn jeans. Boots. His hair switched every which way with the wind.
Perfect.
A slow smile crept over his face as I pulled up next to him, and although I couldn’t see his eyes, I knew he watched me close. I stepped out of my car and he was there, my face in his hands, his mouth descending on mine. I drank him in.
I was getting way too used to it.
He pulled back, though, and kissed my forehead. Took off his shades. While his mood was buoyant, his eyes seemed heavier. Sad. “Let’s eat.”
Inside, one older couple sat close to the hearth at a small table. Kane led me over to a booth overlooking the ridge and pines and cottonwoods, and I scooted into my seat. Surprisingly, he slid in beside me. He draped an arm over my shoulders.
“Is this okay?” he asked.
I nodded.
The waitress came over—a thin, middle-aged woman with pale bl
onde hair. Kane ordered hot chocolate, and he looked at me. “Do you want some, Harper?”
I hesitated. I wasn’t used to having things bought for me. But the waitress, well, waited, and I didn’t want to seem like a weirdo. “Yes, please.”
“Gotcha. You look over the menu and I’ll come back with your drinks.” She walked off, Kane thanked her, and he ducked his head to look at me closer. “Something’s bothering you?”
Suddenly, that wary feeling returned. I usually ate once a day. Sparingly, to save money. I kept bananas and apples—anything that didn’t need refrigeration, in my room, and I’d make them last all week. I didn’t splurge on café lattes and hot cocoa. My routine seemed rather average and normal…until someone else got a glimpse into my private life.
Then it seemed strange. Very, very abnormal. Not average at all.
I pasted a smile. “I’m fine, really.”
Silently, he studied me. The guy with more perception than I’d ever given him credit for. I didn’t think he bought my lie, but he didn’t call me out on it. For that I was thankful.
He opened the plastic menu in front of us and we looked over it together. When he chose a burger, I chose a small bowl of house soup. His gaze slipped to mine.
“Harper,” he said softly after the waitress left. In his eyes, worry. Another thing I wasn’t used to. “You eat like a bird. Aren’t you hungry?”
“This will be just enough to tide me over until I get home,” I answered quickly. “They’ll have so much food prepared, I’ll want to make sure I have plenty of room in my stomach.” I smiled. “Besides. Soup is good. It’s nice and warm.” I sipped my cocoa. “I’m fine, really.”
“Is it because you hate where my money comes from?” he asked.
I considered that. “Yes. And also I’m not a big eater, is all.”
