Behind the Lens

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Behind the Lens Page 17

by Heather Dahlgren


  “Fuck, Jax, take me home.” She doesn’t need to say it again. I don’t even bother saying goodbye to anyone. I put her down and we leave hand in hand. When we get outside, I grab a taxi that is waiting to take drunk asses like us home. We get in and she climbs onto my lap. We are like a bunch of teenagers making out in the back seat, but fuck, it’s hot. I lift her shirt just a bit exposing her stomach. I lick and suck on her soft skin, causing her to let out a moan. I look up at her, and my heart explodes.

  “Kallie, I love you.” She sucks in a breath, and a tear runs down her cheek.

  “I love you too, Jax.” Holy shit. She loves me. We kiss again, but this time, we take our time savoring the moment. I know I’m drunk, and I know I won’t remember most of what happened tonight, but I sure as fuck will remember this.

  I LIE AWAKE IN JAX’S arms thinking about last night. I wasn’t drunk like Jax was. I had a buzz going on, but he was trashed. It was actually the first time since I met him that I’ve seen him like that, but let me just say that being trashed does not prevent my guy from performing, multiple times. He was rough and wild, and I loved every minute of it. The thing that got me most was when he told me he loved me. He told me over and over last night, causing the last bit of questioning to completely vanish.

  I know that even if he doesn’t remember actually saying it to me, he meant it. Just looking into his eyes, I know. I know without question that this is where I belong, that we are meant to be together. It may be against everything that I thought I stood for, but sometimes, life just doesn’t work out the way you expect it to. He has crept his way into my heart, a long time ago, and left his mark. There is no turning back.

  I turn in his arms and look at him sleeping soundly. It’s not something I usually get to do since he is always up before me and asleep after me. I honestly can’t believe that I’m his, that he loves me. I look at his arms, taking in the riot of color, the way his muscles seem to enhance each one. “Morning.” I look up at his sleepy eyes and smile.

  “Good morning. How are you feeling?” He winks and kisses the top of my head.

  “Not the first time I got trashed, Kallie. I’m good.” I roll my eyes and he chuckles. I want to ask him if he remembers what he said, but I won’t.

  “So last night was a lot of fun, right?” I can’t keep the smile off my face.

  “Last night was amazing.” Fuck yes, it was.

  “You hungry? I was going to go make us some breakfast.” He flips me onto my back and places his arms on either side of my face. He kisses me, devouring me. I run my hands up into his hair and tangle them in. We both pull away breathing heavily. He is searching my eyes, looking so deep into them, I feel like he can see my soul.

  “I’ve done a lot of shitty things in my life, Kallie. I’ve gotten high, I’ve fought, I’ve stolen. I don’t know how I deserve you, how the world lined up perfectly, but I’m so fucking grateful. Because now . . . now when I get high, it’s on your touch. I’ll still fight, but for you, and I’ll continue stealing, but only your heart. I love you so much, so fucking much.” That does it, and I let the tears fall. He kisses them away before kissing my lips.

  “I love you so much, Jax, and even though you may feel undeserving of me . . . that couldn’t be further from the truth. You have nothing to be ashamed of. I love you for all that you are and all that you were.” I can honestly say that this is the first time in all the time I’ve known him, that he looks emotional. He slowly leans down and kisses me with a kiss that is full of love and promises of the future. He softly runs his hands down my camisole top until he reaches the bottom. He pulls it up and over my head, but quickly replaces it with his lips. I wrap my arms around his neck while he removes my panties and his boxers. I want him so badly in this moment. I feel so raw with emotions.

  He quickly reaches over and rolls on a condom. Neither of us has said a word; we are just staring into each other’s eyes. I’ve never felt this connected to another person, like we are becoming one. My heart is beating in my chest, but it now completely belongs to him. He links our fingers, and never once breaking eye contact, he pushes into me, slowly. It feels incredible, as we both gently begin moving. I close my eyes letting the feeling wash over my body. “Baby, please look at me. I need to see you.” I quickly open them back up, and he picks up his pace just slightly. “You feel so fucking amazing. I’ll never get my fill.” He’s right, I’ll never get my fill either, but it’s different this time. It’s sweet, romantic even. We are searching each other’s eyes, and he starts moving faster.

  “Oh yes.” I toss my head back, and he kisses my neck. My body is so overstimulated that even his simple kisses on my neck cause me to moan loudly. He moves down and licks my nipple, causing me to arch my back and dig my nails into his hand. I try to pick up the pace, but he isn’t having it; he is keeping his steady rhythm. He moves to my next breast, nipping at my nipple, and I scream out. I try harder to get him to move faster, but it’s useless.

  He lets go of my hands and wraps his arms around me before rolling us so I’m on top. “Take over, Kallie. Show me how fast you want me to go.” I plant my hands on his solid chest and begin riding him, and the faster I move, the harder he gives it back. He reaches up and massages my breasts when I pick up my pace. “Fuck yes. You are so incredibly sexy, keep going baby, make me come.” I don’t even know where it comes from, but I move at a frantic pace trying to get us both off. Every moan and growl he lets out just fuels me to ride him harder. I feel myself getting close, and I know it won’t be much longer. He must know because he pinches both nipples, and it throws me over the edge.

  “Jax.” I throw my head back as wave after wave of orgasmic bliss washes over me. He lets go of my tits and grabs onto my ass, digging his fingers in. I’m reeling from my orgasm, and when I feel his legs start to tense, I know he’s close. I keep one hand on his chest and run the other one down to where we are one. I look down and see his cock, covered in my essence, moving in and out of me. It’s fucking hot. I cup his balls in my hand and massage them, and holy fuck, does it work.

  “Oh fuck. Holy shit, Kallie.” He stills as his orgasm washes over him, and it is one of the sexiest things I’ve ever seen. His eyes are closed, his muscles are tense, and he has a look of sheer pleasure on his face. I stop moving and lie my body down on him. I can hear the rapid beating of his heart, and I can feel mine. He moves one hand off my ass and lifts my chin to look at him. “I love you.” I smile and kiss his chest.

  “I love you too.” He wraps both arms around me, and we lie in our post orgasmic euphoria.

  After we finally are able to get out of bed, we both shower and decide to go out to breakfast. We are now sitting in one of my favorite little unknown diners, drinking our coffee and waiting for our food. “So I never got to ask about your shoot yesterday. How did it go?” When he picked me up last night, I could tell he was annoyed with me, but he never said anything. I thought I was saving time by just getting ready, but I should have called. We never even talked about our shoots.

  He leans back in the booth and rests one arm up on it. “Honestly, it was nothing special. He was very boring. Not someone I am overly excited about working with again.” Damn, that’s the worst. A photographer should do everything they can to make the shoot fun and exciting. I know, I try my best every time.

  “That sucks for him, but I have news.” He raises his eyebrows and I laugh. “We didn’t do much talking last night.” We both laugh, and he leans over and kisses my lips.

  “What’s your news?” I take a sip of my coffee and smile.

  “I got an email from an author who wants to do a custom shoot with you and Brinley for her next book. What do you think?” I’ve had a lot of authors buy my photos recently, but this is the first wanting a custom shoot. Well, if you don’t count the fake shoot I did with Jax for my birthday.

  “I think that’s fucking amazing, and I’m incredibly proud of you. When is it?” This man never ceases to amaze me.

  “I
need to figure out everyone’s schedule first, but I’m hoping for as soon as possible. The author, Karen, lives close by and wants to be there for it. I figured we would go to that park we found because she wants it outdoors.” I know this shoot will be amazing. Jax and Brinley will make the most stunning cover together. I’m excited for everyone involved.

  “I actually don’t have anything for the next two weeks. Then I have a big shoot with Romance and a few others after, so the sooner, the better for me.” They drop off our food and we dig in. We continue talking about the shoot, and the more we talk, the more excited I get. It seems too good to be true. My career is taking off and I’m in love. If someone had told me a year ago this would happen, I would have thought they were crazy, but here I am eating breakfast with my model boyfriend. Unfuckingreal.

  After breakfast, we decide to go take a run on the beach by his place. He wants to hit the gym, but I want to be outside and enjoy the warm weather. Thankfully, I left some clothes at his place, so I change out of my dress and put on shorts and a tank top. I pull my hair up into a ponytail and I’m ready. I sit on the couch waiting for Jax to finish getting ready, and Blake comes in the front door smiling at me. “There’s the most beautiful photographer I know.” He sits down next to me and wraps his arm around me. I just laugh because he’s always like this with me. The more I am here, the closer we get, and I like that since he is like a brother to Jax.

  “Are you just getting home from last night?” He squeezes my shoulder and winks at me.

  “Hell yes, I am. Let me tell you, sometimes when you are banging two chicks, there just isn’t enough time in the day. You know what I mean?”

  “Blake, get the fuck off my girlfriend with your dirty ass hand. Who the hell knows where it’s been.” I cringe away from him, and he just laughs.

  “Oh, brother, you want to know where this hand has been?” I jump up and cover my ears.

  “I sure as fuck don’t.” Both he and Jax laugh at me, and I shudder thinking about that nasty hand that just touched me. “I need to wash my shoulder real quick.” I run into the bathroom and scrub it with a soapy washcloth before walking back to the living room. They are laughing when I get there, and Jax wraps me in his arms and kisses my head.

  “He washed his hands, baby, don’t worry.” The only thing I keep thinking is . . . ewww. “You ready to go?” I pull away and start for the door.

  “I’m definitely ready.”

  “Kallie, I would never touch you without washing my hands first. I wouldn’t want some other girl’s juices on you.” I close my eyes and shake my head.

  “You really are nasty as hell.” I go to push the door open and hear Blake say ouch. I turn and he is rubbing his arm.

  “Don’t be such a fucking pig.” I laugh and walk outside. Jax meets me in the driveway, and we begin our run.

  “Sorry about Blake. He doesn’t really mean anything by it, he’s just a pig.” I laugh and look over at him.

  “He really is a pig, but I’ve gotten used to him after all this time. Maybe not the threesomes and touching me after, but I know he’s just kidding.” We keep up a steady pace when we hit the sand. It feels good having the burn in my legs. There are quite a few people out today enjoying the weather like we are. I giggle to myself when I see all the selfie pictures going on. Not that I don’t do it, but it’s funny to see it happen every few steps.

  I’m proud of myself for keeping up with Jax. We are running back now, and even though I’m starting to get out of breath, it feels great. “You still good?” He’s asked me ten times already if I’m good.

  “Yes.” He looks over at me and I laugh. “Okay, I’m a little out of breath, but keep going.” We make it more than halfway back when I start getting a cramp in my side. I refuse to stop though; run through the pain I keep telling myself. I can see the end of the beach where we get off, and I’m so grateful. I take two more steps, and the cramp gets so tight I have no choice but to stop and bend over. I’m breathing so heavily, and with each deep breath, it hurts more.

  “Oh shit, Kallie, what’s wrong.” I lift my head, still bent over, and look at him.

  “Cramp. I tried to run through it, but I can’t. I need a second.” He rubs my back and tells me to take deep breaths. The longer I do it, the better I start to feel. After a few minutes, I stand up straight. “Okay, damn that hurt. I’m good now though.” He kisses my lips and looks me up and down.

  “Are you sure? There is no rush. I don’t want you to hurt yourself.” I laugh and push up on my toes to kiss him.

  “I’m positive. It was just a cramp. It’s completely gone now.” He smirks and comes toward me. I slowly back up because I don’t like that smirk; he’s going to do something.

  “Where are you going? I’m just moving closer to you.” I giggle and walk back further.

  “Bullshit.” He laughs and runs at me. I turn to run, but he’s too fast. He grabs me and tosses me over his shoulder. I squeal, and he laughs and smacks my ass.

  “I should carry you so you don’t get another cramp.” I’m laughing so hard I can’t even reply. He walks toward the water, and I try to get out of his hold. “Maybe you just need to cool off.” I am kicking my feet and trying to push off his shoulder, but laughing hysterically the entire time.

  “The water is too cold, don’t you dare.” We get right to where the waves are running up to the sand and he stops.

  “You sure?” He’s laughing just as hard as I am. We must look like complete idiots. He lets me slide down his now sweaty body, but he holds onto my ass when my face meets his. “You make me so damn happy.” I press my lips to his, and we share one hell of a kiss.

  “You make me just as happy.” We hug and hold onto each other for several minutes before he finally lets my feet touch the sand. He takes my hand, and we walk away from the water.

  “We’ll walk home.” I kiss his brightly colored arm, and we walk home hand in hand.

  Jax wanted to have a couple people over so he could barbeque. We went to the store, got way too much food, and now I am sitting at the table watching him clean the pool. I look over at the hot tub and get up to go feel the water. I stick my hand in and moan. He snaps his head up to me and I laugh. “The water feels amazing. We need to get in here tonight.” He puts down the skimmer and comes over to me. He pulls me close, kissing my lips.

  “I’ll make sure you really moan in that hot tub.” You’d think we didn’t just have sex this morning with the way my body reacts to his words.

  “I look forward to seeing if that’s true.” A smile spreads across his face.

  “Baby, you’ll be screaming my name. That is a guarantee.” I pull his shirt and he comes closer. I nip his bottom lip, and he captures my mouth in a delicious kiss. I hike my leg up and he squeezes my ass.

  “Is this a show I need to pay to watch, or can I just sit here?” I pull away quickly and drop my leg. “Oh, don’t stop just because I’m here. I was looking forward to this.” Jax rolls his eyes at me and kisses my cheek before walking over to punch Blake, hard. “Ouch. Fuck, will you stop hitting me today?” I giggle and go back to my seat at the table.

  “Stop being such an asshole, and I’ll stop hitting you. Did you get the beer?” They both light a cigarette, and Jax raises his eyebrows.

  “Yes, shit, I got the beer.” The sliding door opens and Brody walks out. It makes my heart so happy and sad at the same time. I miss Braden horribly, and seeing Jax and Brody together just reminds me what I’m missing, but I’m so thankful they have each other. Brody comes over to me, and I stand up to give him a hug.

  “Hey, sis,” he whispers in my ear. I pull back and look at him with a tear in my eye. These Burke boys are good for that. He smiles and kisses my cheek. “You and Jax are meant to be, you’re my sister now.” I launch onto him and squeeze him hard.

  “Thank you.”

  “Brody, get your own woman.” He looks down at me, shaking his head. I wish I could fix him up with someone; he deserves to be happy aga
in.

  The party is in full swing, and I am having a blast. Brinley came with Nora and Jackie. I’m so excited to see them. I haven’t spent hardly any time with them the last few months. “I still can’t believe that you are dating Jax Burke.” I roll my eyes at Jackie when she says it for the fifth time.

  “Jack, will you stop. He’s a guy, just like any other guy.” All three of them laugh, and I can’t help but join. “Okay, so he’s fucking hot as hell.” We all laugh and throw back another shot.

  “Kall, please tell me he’s as good in bed in real life as he is in my fantasies?” I throw a chip at her and laugh.

  “Stop fantasizing about my boyfriend, Nora.” She lifts her shoulders and eats the chip. Just then, I feel his strong arms wrap around me. I swear Nora and Jackie both let out a sigh.

  “Hey, ladies.” Brinley is the only composed one; it’s embarrassing really. I turn my head and smile at him.

  “Hey. What’s up?” He kisses me quickly and smiles down at me.

  “Nothing. I saw you laughing, and well, you know how I love that.” I place my hands over his and smile at him.

  “I know you do.” We are just staring at each other when Brinley finally breaks in.

  “You two are sickening.” We both laugh and I flip her off. “Let’s move this party to the fire pit, ladies.” She gets up, but Nora and Jackie keep looking at us. Again, embarrassing. “Hey, I meant you two.” They snap their heads to her and giggle before getting up and following her.

 

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