by Joan Jonker
This is a woman after me own heart, Nellie told herself, and decided not to mess around but get straight to the point. ‘Did some bloke put a leaflet through yer door yesterday?’
‘Yeah. Why, did you get one?’
Nellie shook her head. ‘No. We don’t live round here, yer see. But we happened to be in the street yesterday visiting a friend when we saw the man handing them out, or putting them through letter boxes. We’re curious about what was on the leaflet.’
The woman pursed her lips. ‘I can’t remember it word for word, queen, and as I was out I didn’t see the bloke. But he’s asking if anyone has any pictures, ornaments or glassware that they want to sell. He’s coming back next Tuesday, and from what the neighbours have told me, he’ll give cash in hand for anything he buys.’
Molly asked, ‘Are yer thinking of selling him something?’
The woman laughed. ‘My feller took one look at it and told me to put it in the bin. He said if the bloke had a good business, with a shop, then he wouldn’t need to be knocking on doors. I didn’t throw the leaflet away, though, I stuck it in one of the sideboard drawers.’ She raised her brows. ‘Why are yer so interested? I’ve got a feeling there’s more to it than you wanting a piece of paper with writing on.’
‘There is.’ Molly had made up her mind she wasn’t going to tell any more lies. When she was a child, she’d had it drummed into her that you always got paid back for telling untruths. ‘Look, yer don’t know us from Adam, but I can assure you we are just two very ordinary, but honest, housewives, who started out to help a friend of ours. She’s a widow, and we’re very fond of her, and we’re afraid she’s being taken for a ride by a man who looks, dresses and talks like a proper gentleman.’
‘Ay, this is getting very interesting,’ said the woman. ‘Would yer stay here for about ten minutes while I run to the butcher’s? Yer can come home with me then, and yer can tell me all what’s going on over a cup of tea.’
‘Ooh, we don’t want to be a nuisance, sunshine. Yer’ve probably got other things to do.’
Nellie wasn’t having that. She had no intention of letting this woman escape. They were lucky they hadn’t stopped one who would tell them to get lost. ‘I think yer’d find it very interesting, girl. And yer may be able to help us.’
The woman pointed to the pavement. ‘Stay right there, and don’t move until I come back.’ With that, she took to her heels and made haste, darting between the other shoppers.
‘Ay, we hopped in lucky there, girl.’ Nellie was looking well pleased with herself. ‘She seems very nice.’
Molly nodded. ‘I think we should tell her the whole story, sunshine. It wouldn’t be fair to ask her to help if we don’t tell her the truth. So we’ll tell her everything except Claire’s name and where she works.’ Then she had second thoughts. ‘I don’t think we should give our full names and addresses, either. Not until we know the woman better.’
‘Yeah, yer’ve got a point there, Molly. My feller wouldn’t be very happy if Mr Collins came knocking on our door wanting a fight. Especially if he was in the middle of his dinner.’
‘Talking of husbands, hers seems to have his head screwed on, telling her to throw the leaflet away. He must have thought there was something fishy.’
‘If we go about it the right way, girl, and get her on our side, she could help us nab Mr Graham bleeding Collins.’
‘It would be wonderful if ye’re right, sunshine, but let’s not rush into anything. Best to test the waters first.’
‘Yeah, okay, girl. What is it I’m going to be the soul of?’
‘Discretion, sunshine.’
‘That’s it. One of these days I’ll give yer a fright and remember it.’
The woman came running up to them. ‘That wasn’t long, was it? There weren’t many in the shop, and I only wanted half a pound of liver. I’ve got the onions and potatoes in.’ She grinned. ‘My name’s Sally. What’s yours?’
Nellie banged her chest like Tarzan. ‘Me Nellie, her Molly.’
‘Follow me to the jungle, then, ladies, and I’ll make yer a nice pot of tea. And what yer have to tell me had better be worth it.’
‘Oh, it is, girl,’ Nellie said, with a hop, skip and a jump to keep up. ‘Anyway, if yer don’t think so, I can always make something up. My mate will tell yer, I’m very good at making stories up.’
Sally put the key in her door. ‘Welcome to my humble abode, ladies. And don’t bother wiping yer feet, yer’d be better off wiping them on yer way out.’
Nellie was laughing so much she fell up the two steps.
Chapter Twenty-Two
‘Yer’ve got yer house nice, Sally,’ Molly said as she gazed with approval round the well-kept room. ‘As me ma would say, it’s like a little palace.’
‘I do me best.’ Sally pulled two chairs out from the table and waved a hand, inviting them to take a seat. ‘It’s not perfect, but at least it’s all mine. I’m not up to me eyes in debt like some people.’
‘Same as us, girl,’ Nellie told her. ‘Me and Molly don’t have anything on the never-never, either. My feller wouldn’t hear of it. He says if we want anything, then we save up until we can afford it.’
Molly spoke up. ‘George is right, too, ’cos once yer get yerself deep into debt, yer never get out of it.’
Sally had her back to them, rooting through one of the drawers in her sideboard. Then she gave a cry of success and held a white leaflet aloft. ‘Found it! I knew I hadn’t thrown it out.’ She laid it on the table. ‘Yer can be reading this while I make the pot of tea I promised.’
Nellie moved up closer to Molly, who had the leaflet in her hand. ‘We’ll read it together, eh, girl? Then if there’s any big words on it, yer can tell me what they mean.’
Molly’s eyes flew across the lines. ‘It’s what we expected, sunshine, almost word for word. In short, it’s saying he’ll pay good prices for pictures, ornaments and glassware, if they’re in good condition.’
Sally had put a light under the kettle, and now she popped her head round the door. ‘Do you two know the bloke?’
‘Only by sight,’ Molly told her. ‘We’ve never spoken to him.’
‘Then why are yer so interested in him? Spill the beans, or yer don’t get a cup of tea. And I warn yer, I can be vicious when crossed.’
Molly grinned. ‘You try that and I’ll set me mate on to yer. And I warn you, Nellie doesn’t fight with her hands, she uses her tummy as a battering ram.’
‘How long have you two been mates?’ Sally asked, then answered herself, ‘Years, I bet.’
‘Roughly twenty-five,’ Molly told her. ‘We both moved into the street after we were married, three doors away from each other. We were strangers then, of course, not pally like we are now.’ She turned to look at Nellie’s chubby face, which was creased in a smile. ‘By my reckoning, we’ve been good mates for at least twenty-two years.’
When Nellie nodded, her bosom, tummy and chins did the same thing. And a wide-eyed Sally saw her table rising from the floor. ‘She’s right, girl, and we’ve never had a falling-out in all that time.’
‘In twenty-two years yer’ve never had a row?’
‘Oh, we’ve had rows.’ Molly laughed. ‘High ding-dong, calling each other for everything under the sun. Then as suddenly as it starts, it stops, and we make a pot of tea as though nothing has happened. And when we laugh about it afterwards, we can never remember what it was about.’
Nellie was bursting with pride when she said, ‘My son Steve is married to Molly’s daughter Jill, and they’ve given us a granddaughter. And her other daughter, Doreen, married a lovely bloke called Phil, and they’ve given us a grandson.’ She couldn’t get the words out fast enough, expecting Molly to interrupt at any time. ‘And Molly’s son, Tommy, he married an Irish girl called Rosie, but they haven’t given us anything yet.’
‘Nellie, sunshine, will yer stop for breath?’ Molly was smiling when she shook her head. ‘Yer had me breathing for yer.’
‘I know, girl, but I still haven’t told Sally that we’re related.’
‘But we’re not related, sunshine, I keep telling yer that! We’re only related by marriage, that’s all. We’re both grandma to little Molly, but you are only an adopted grandma to Bobby.’
Nellie’s eyes disappeared as she sought a solution. Eventually she peeped at Molly. ‘Are your Jill and Doreen sisters, or not?’
‘Of course they’re sisters, yer silly nit. Yer should know the answer to that after all these years.’
‘So they are related? Is that right, girl?’
‘Well, sisters usually are related, sunshine.’ Molly was gripping her hands to stop herself from becoming impatient. ‘Same as your Steve and Paul are related.’
Sally was watching this from the kitchen door. The kettle had started to boil, but she’d turned the gas low so she wouldn’t miss anything. These two were like watching a short comedy at the pictures. It was no wonder they’d never fallen out in twenty-two years: they hadn’t had time to.
Nellie was nodding slowly, with a smile on her face. ‘Ah, well, I’ve got yer there, girl. Yer see, if Jill and Doreen are related, and our Steve is related because he married Jill, then there’s no doubt but that his mother is related as well.’ She sat back in the chair as much as to say, get out of that if you can.
Molly had no intention of getting in or out, or they’d be here all day. ‘Okay, sunshine, let’s agree to disagree, eh?’
It took a few seconds for Nellie to unravel that in her head. And from what she could make out, Molly had given in and admitted Nellie was in the right. ‘Yeah, okay, girl. Yer know I’m not one to gloat when someone admits they were wrong.’
‘Thanks, sunshine. It’s very good of yer to be so magnanimous, and I do appreciate it.’ Over Nellie’s head, Molly’s eyes told a baffled Sally that there was nothing to worry about, because most days were like this. ‘Now we’ve sorted that out, perhaps Sally can get on making the tea.’
‘Hold yer horses, girl, don’t be so bleeding quick off the mark. Nothing is sorted out until I know what yer’ve just called me?’
Molly pretended to think. ‘I can’t remember now. Oh, yes I can, of course, I called yer sunshine, like I always do.’
Nellie’s chins were quick off the mark: they started to shake before her head did. ‘I’m not falling for that, girl. I’m not deaf or stupid. Yer said I was maggotus, and that’s not a very nice thing to say about yer mate. In fact, if yer weren’t me mate, yer’d be flat out on the floor by now, pleading for mercy.’
‘If that’s the way yer feel about it, Nellie, then I promise I’ll never again say you are generous. That’s as long as yer promise never to floor me.’
‘Yer must think I was born yesterday, girl, to believe that. With my own ears I never heard yer saying I was generous.’
Sally was tickled pink, and wishing they were her neighbours. That was until Nellie wanted her to be a witness.
‘You heard what she called me, Sally, so go on, tell her.’
‘Ooh, I heard her, queen, but I couldn’t get me mouth round that word. I know what it means, but I couldn’t say it. I was never very good at English in school, but I do know it means good, or generous.’
Nellie’s expression changed to one of sweetness and light. ‘I was only pulling yer leg, girl. I knew what it meant all along. I mean, no one could say I wasn’t generous, now could they? If I saw someone in the street what was hungry, I’d share me dinner with them.’
Molly raised her brows. ‘What about yer last custard slice? Would yer give that to someone who was starving?’
That needed some serious thought. And the solution came to Nellie like a flash of lightning. ‘Well, perhaps not, girl, but I’d give them the money to go and buy themselves one.’
When Molly heard Sally’s hearty chortle, she looked across at her. ‘We could still be here when yer family come in from work, sunshine, so take my advice and make that pot of tea. We can be drinking it while we tell yer how we came to be standing on the corner of your street. If yer can help, we’ll be very grateful. If yer can’t, then nothing has been lost. We’ll get out of the way and let yer get on with what yer would have been doing if we hadn’t come on the scene and turned yer routine upside down.’
‘I’ll make the tea, queen, but don’t worry about being in the way. I’ve had a good laugh, and if I can help yer, then I will. If not, yer’ve still been like a breath of fresh air. I’m not surprised yer haven’t fallen out in twenty-odd years. Yer haven’t had time.’
Nellie shook with laughter, and so did the table. ‘Ay, that was good, girl. I’ll have to tell George that in bed tonight.’
Molly’s hand across her mouth prevented Nellie from saying any more. ‘Make the tea, Sally, before Nellie gets to her bedroom. If she beats yer to it, we will definitely be here when yer family get in from work.’ She began to chuckle. ‘Did I hear yer say yer husband had a good sense of humour?’
‘I didn’t say, it, queen, but yeah, he’s got a great sense of humour. He can always see the funny side of life.’
‘So he’ll have a good laugh when yer tell him yer went out for half a pound of liver and picked us up on the way. It’s enough to put the poor man off liver for the rest of his life.’
Nellie had been looking from one to the other, and now she said, ‘Ah, ay, girl, we won’t be here when her husband comes home, so don’t be frightening the woman. We’ve got to be home to see to the dinners for our family, don’t forget.’
‘I’m definitely going to make the tea now, ladies, and it’ll be on the table in five minutes. D’yer think yer can keep mum for that length of time?’
Looking at Nellie, Molly pursed her lips. She’d never known her mate to be silent for five whole minutes. ‘Ooh, that’s asking something, sunshine. Could yer make it four minutes and I’ll do me best?’
‘Has this good friend of yours known the bloke for long?’ Sally asked as they sat round the table with a cup of tea and a plate of arrowroot biscuits in front of them. ‘I mean, is she courting him?’
Molly shook her head. ‘She’s only known him a few weeks. She’s a beautiful-looking woman, and really nice. Her husband died about five years ago, leaving her to bring up two children on a meagre widow’s pension. So she’s had a hard time. Her eldest, a boy, left school at Christmas and got a job, but as an apprentice he only gets paid in buttons. So she managed to get herself taken on in a shop, and with the two lots of money coming in life is a little easier for her. She doesn’t work full time, though, ’cos she likes to be home for her daughter coming in from school. She’s a good mother, and a really smashing person. Yer can’t help but like her.’
Molly took a sip of her tea before carrying on. ‘This man comes in the shop where she works: that’s how she met him. He began by being friendly, then each time he came in he would stay a little longer, chatting to her. He told her he was a bachelor, and lived with his aged mother. Then he asked her out. And because he dresses like a toff, talks like a toff, and acts like a toff, we think she was flattered. She’d been lonely since her husband died, and she agreed to go out with him. That was last week, and he took her to a theatre, with a box of chocolates thrown in for good measure. And she’s going out with him again this week. Now that would be fine, and me and Nellie would be really made up for her because she deserves some happiness in her life. And she spoke so highly of him, we were nosy, and wanted to see this paragon of virtue for ourselves. We didn’t tell her, of course, which seems underhanded, but we were curious because he sounded too good to be true. Too sweet to be wholesome, as Nellie’s ma would have said. So we went and stood by the shop where she works, until he came. Not that we stood there on the off chance; she’d told us he came in the same time each Monday and Tuesday. Anyway, along he comes, walking with a swagger, as though he owned the ruddy street, and me and Nellie took an instant dislike to him. He appeared too cocky for our liking. Oh, he was well dressed and looked quite the man abou
t town, but we both agreed that he’s not what he seems. In other words, we don’t think he’s genuine, and we don’t want to see our friend hurt.’
Nellie had been quiet long enough. ‘Molly’s right, girl, he’s a real smarmy bugger. And we’ve found out he’s a bleeding liar. He hasn’t got a mother, he lives alone, and he’s got another woman on the go as well. At least he’s got one we know of, but he could have half a dozen or more. I wouldn’t put it past him.’
‘How d’yer know all this?’ Sally asked. ‘Did someone tell yer?’
Before Molly could stop her, Nellie carried on. ‘We followed him, girl. That’s how we found out.’ She looked well pleased with herself. ‘Yes, me and Molly followed him and caught him red-handed, kissing a woman outside her house. And we heard her trying to coax him in, and him saying he’d be back later.’
‘But how d’yer know he hasn’t got an elderly mother?’ Sally was intrigued. ‘Yer didn’t stop him and ask him, did yer?’
Molly cut in before Nellie’s imagination ran riot. ‘We found out where he lived, sunshine, and spoke to one of the neighbours. We told a few white lies, but from what she told us he definitely lives alone.’
‘Are yer going to tell your friend what you’ve found out? Better put her wise before she gets in too deep.’
‘We will when we can prove we’re right about him. We think he’s a scoundrel, but we can’t prove it yet. That’s where the leaflets come into it. Yer see, we followed him on Tuesday, and saw him knocking on doors and giving the leaflets out. I was near the entry at the top of the street, and I heard everything he said to the woman who lives in the first house.’
Sally nodded. ‘That’s Mrs Seddon. I was talking to her at the shops yesterday. She said she’s rooting a few things out, ’cos she could do with the money.’
‘We think he’s a con man, and on the make. He’ll probably give her a fraction of what the things are worth. I’d tell the woman if I knew her, ’cos I hate to see anyone taken for a ride.’
