A veil shuttered his features as if he perceived he spoke from his heart. After a minute he seemed to recognize that she was there, and he skimmed his fingers down her arm. She couldn’t explain how, but she knew she was the closest she would ever be to him.
“For you, I will brave any danger to give you peace of mind.” He kissed her. “I’ll make something for dinner, then head out.” He turned her toward the kitchen door and swatted her on the bottom. “Now go play your video game.”
* * * *
Later that evening Matteo sat behind a scarred desk at Arnold’s Bail Bonds. They didn’t get much business this time of night, but someone had to keep an eye on the store, so to speak.
Fine by him. With Lincoln being away for a few more days chasing down a couple of bonds with Jacqui, Matteo was free to poke around the computer for anything that didn’t look right.
Matteo thumbed through the small stack of files on the desk. Finding nothing, he pulled open a drawer and frowned. Two tickets to the circus for Sunday afternoon. Was this an outing for Randa?
His phone vibrated on the desk beside him. He spared it a glance before tapping the speaker icon and then returned the tickets to where he found them. He went to work on the computer.
“Yes?”
“I got word that someone is looking into your background.”
Matteo lifted his fingers from the keyboard. “Are you sure?”
“Indeed, my friend.”
“All right. Keep me posted. I need to finish up something, but let me know if anything pops.” He disconnected the call, leaned back in his chair, and blew out a breath. Who in the world could be investigating him after all this time? He was pretty sure his story would hold up. After all, it had taken him through the past several years.
Shrugging, he leaned forward again and continued searching through Linc’s computer files. There was nothing at the house, so that meant whatever the man was hiding had to be here.
Matteo started with the e-mails. Most of those were offers from Randa’s favorite lingerie place. Hmm…35 percent off select lace nighties. A smile curved his lips. He’d have to check that out later. Something pink and frilly would be right up his alley, and he’d love to peel Randa out of it.
He scrolled down, almost clicked the arrow to send him to the next page, and then stopped. Was that… No, it couldn’t be.
Clicking the subject line opened the missive, and Matteo let out a whistle. “Well, damn.” Lincoln had taken a paternity test.
Matteo compared the date on the test sample to the e-mail. Barely a week. He wiped a hand down his face. There was no way in the world he could tell Randa what he’d found.
God, now he wished he didn’t know what Lincoln was hiding. This time the knowledge was too much of a burden. From the time Matteo moved into the Arnold home, he’d made a promise never to lie to Randa, but he didn’t see a way out of breaking that promise. This was definitely something he couldn’t tell Randa. Not only was it not his place, it sure as hell wasn’t his secret.
All he could do was be there for her when she found out. He winced. That was not going to be a pretty conversation.
He sat back, dragging his fingers through his hair. What was he going to tell Randa?
* * * *
Matteo gazed out into the lush, open fields. Everywhere he looked, shades of green mingled with bright bursts of purples and reds. A gentle breeze whispered the scent of honeysuckle and roses in the air, while a hint of hickory vied for his attention. He exhaled. Content. For the first time in a very long time, he was at home. He glanced over his shoulder at the woman seated inside the screened-in porch in front of a television. She gave him this precious gift. She and her husband.
Despite the secrets he held, he was definitely happy. Randa hadn’t asked him if he’d found anything. He just couldn’t find it in his heart to deceive her. Enough lies had been told to her in her relationships.
Matteo wandered over to the grill and lifted the lid. White smoke billowed around him as the fire crackled and popped. The scent of roasted meat filled his nostrils. Matteo squinted, flipped the burgers, and then closed the lid. There was still so much he had to tell her about his past. The evening of his nightmare was just the tip of what he’d experienced.
Not once had she brought up what he told her, and he appreciated that. He still worried that he put her in danger. He needed to at least share with her his real name, yet there never seemed to be a right time.
He’d wanted to tell her after their threesome, but time was too short, and he’d been called away for business. Leaving her with a bombshell like that didn’t seem right, especially when he knew she would have questions. And then there was one small hiccup he hadn’t anticipated. His emotions.
He was in love with Randa, and the last thing he wanted to do was hurt her. A faint squeak preceded cold air swirling around his ankles. Floorboards creaked, not the light tread he expected. These were heavier and authoritative. A door slammed behind him. Matteo shifted.
“Lincoln. How was your flight? Randa know you’re back?” Ever since that wonderful night, things had been tense between him and Lincoln, and Matteo didn’t quite know why.
“I wanted to talk to you before I saw her.”
Matteo studied the other man’s face. Something in his expression triggered a long-buried survival instinct, and Matteo moved closer to the stairs just in case he needed a hasty exit.
“Sure. What’s on your mind? Need someone to help take down a bail jumper? I didn’t write too many bonds while you were away.” He kept his tone light. It wouldn’t be the first time Lincoln asked him to assist in finding a fugitive, and he hoped this conversation would be along the same lines. Some flash of uncertainty in Lincoln’s eyes alerted him it wouldn’t be about work.
“No.”
The chill in that one syllable sent a shiver marching down Matteo’s spine.
“I did some checking on you.”
Ah, so that was who was doing the digging. But why?
“And didn’t like what I found.”
So many scenarios played through his head. Had Lincoln somehow stumbled on his real military record or maybe something else Matteo needed to keep hidden?
“What didn’t you like? The A I got in science or how I made my first million before I was thirty?”
“Don’t get flippant with me.” Lincoln slammed down a folder on the red wooden picnic table. “You are a dead man!”
“I think you’re mistaken.” Play it cool. Give nothing away. “As you can see, I’m very much alive.”
Lincoln reddened and snatched open the file. Inside was a glossy 5x7 photo of his face with his stats next to it and the date of his death. Below the photo were his fingerprints.
Matteo kept what he hoped was a stunned expression on his face. At least he didn’t have to fake that emotion. The information he was seeing should not exist. Lincoln had to have some pretty high connections or really dumb luck.
“You call this a mistake? Matteo isn’t even your real name.”
Feigning nonchalance, Matteo thumbed through the papers. His birth certificate, his social security number. Even his military service record. All this should’ve been destroyed. If Lincoln had somehow found this, then he was in danger. They were all in danger.
“You lied to me and my wife.”
Matteo stared at Lincoln without really seeing him. He hadn’t lied. He just chose not to share a part of his past that he wanted to forget. Where could he go? His gaze landed on Randa seated inside the all season room. She met and held his attention, smiled and waved. He waved back.
“And I don’t want you anywhere near my wife!”
Matteo focused on Lincoln. “What?”
“I want you away from my wife and my home. Leave, or I’ll expose the truth to Randa. Leave. Now.”
The pieces slid into place. This had nothing to do with his identity or lack thereof. This had to do with Randa. Plain and simple.
“I’d never hurt Randa
. I love her,” he said quietly.
“And how do you think she would feel, knowing you’ve lied to her all this time?”
“Probably the same way she’d feel if she knew you had a daughter by someone else.” The verbal blow had the desired effect; Lincoln blanched, and his lips firmed. A vein stood out on his forehead.
“Who the hell told you that?”
Matteo smirked. “You’re not the only one who can do research.”
Lincoln gritted his teeth and balled his fists at his sides.
“She wanted two things in this world from you, Lincoln: love and children.” He waited a beat, knowing he was baiting the man. “Now you’re taking everything from her again? I won’t let you hurt her like that.”
Lincoln swung. Matteo sidestepped the blow, shoving the larger man aside. He was not going to get in a physical fight with Randa’s husband, no matter how much Lincoln deserved to get his ass whupped.
Matteo brushed against the railing. “Let’s not do this, man. She deserves better than what we both have given her.”
Lincoln charged him. Wood splintered and cracked as both men went sailing through the rail. Matteo shifted, but not enough to stop Lincoln from landing on him. Breath left Matteo’s lungs in a whoosh as they slammed into shrubbery and the hard earth. Momentarily stunned, Matteo couldn’t avoid the punch aimed for his face.
Pain exploded in his skull. Dazed and gasping for air, Matteo applied his elbows and knees in an effort to get a little breathing room. The last thing he wanted was to truly hurt Randa’s husband, but the bastard was making it very hard for Matteo to ignore his training and treat Lincoln like a thug in an alley.
The crushing weight of Lincoln’s heavier body easing from his and an oof were the only indications that one of his body shots connected. Still he sucker punched Lincoln. Blood spurted from Lincoln’s mouth as his head snapped back.
Both men yelped and fell apart as water, cold and icy, sluiced over them. Matteo couldn’t resist a smile as he twisted his head to stare at a scowling Randa. She kept the water hose firmly aimed at them.
“What the heck is going on?”
Finally able to grab his breath, Matteo rolled to his side. Lincoln wasn’t far away. Though they eyed each other warily, neither answered her question. She hit them with the water again.
“Hey! That’s cold.” Lincoln held his hands up in a feeble attempt to stop the spray.
“Yeah. I know. It’s the perfect thing to cool off tempers.” She looked from one to the other. “So anyone want to explain why the rail is broken and you two are fighting like teenagers?”
Matteo gained his feet, his body protesting the move. He wiped the mud and water from his face with a damp sleeve. Between the chilly air and the cold water, he was already shivering. “Ask Lincoln.” Let the man dig his own grave. Matteo stomped up the deck stairs, paused long enough to pull the burgers off the grill, and then disappeared into the house.
RANDA LOOKED EXPECTANTLY at Lincoln. There was nothing he could say, or rather he didn’t want to say, to his wife. He wasn’t ready to admit the truth, and he wasn’t willing to lie either.
“Just leave it, Randa.”
She waved a hand toward the scattered wood and broken bush. “That’s a really big issue. Something worth talking about.”
He rotated his shoulders. That was the last time he went diving off the deck in a fistfight. “Matteo and I were having a discussion.”
“I’ve half a mind to squirt you again.”
“I’d rather you didn’t.”
She pursed her lips and planted her hands on her hips. The nozzle dropped harmlessly to the ground.
“Sweetheart, for once, just let this go.”
Randa stared up at Lincoln, raising a hand to shield her eyes as she squinted in the sun. “Fine.” She dropped the garden hose and spun on her heel. “I’ll check on Matteo.”
Jealousy spurred him forward, and he blocked her path. “Well, can’t you check on me?”
“Considering you only have a busted lip, I’d say you’re fine. On the other hand, since you were beating the crap out of Matteo, and he’s a little more bruised than you, I thought I’d make sure he’s okay.”
He shook his head and dragged in a deep breath. “I think I deserve your attention right now.”
Something passed through her irises he couldn’t quite define, but she nodded. Tension drained from his body, and his shoulders sagged when he realized she was going to stay with him.
“So how was your trip?”
“We were able to track down the fugitive and bring everybody in that jumped bail.” He smoothed her hair from her face. “You look peaked. Have you been up all night playing video games again?”
A faint blush crept into her cheeks, and he tried not to let that sharp stab of jealousy wash across his face.
“I see.”
She angled back to stare at him. “And you weren’t doing the same thing with Jacqui?”
It was his turn to blush.
“I just don’t get why you have such a problem with Matteo. Is that what you two were fighting about? That he makes love to me? He’s the first man you’ve accepted and hated all at the same time.” She cradled his face between her palms. “You know that I’m perfectly happy with the way our marriage is going now. I feel fulfilled and content. You have no reason to be jealous. No one can ever replace you, Lincoln. No one.”
Despite the sincerity in her words, it didn’t ease the knot of uncertainty in his belly. He just wanted to hold on to Randa and never let her go and never share her with anyone else.
Instead he said, “I don’t deserve you, Randa. You’re everything to me, and while I know you’re mine, it’s hard to let go that you love someone else.”
She smiled, a flash of understanding crossing her features. “It’s scary, but you’ll learn I have enough love for both of you. Just as I learned that you had more than enough love for me and Jacqui.” She leaned into him and jumped back quickly. “You’re all wet. You should go change.”
“I will.”
She briefly studied him. “Did you and she have a fight? Is that why you’re so”—she paused, as if searching for the right word—“unsure about everything?”
“Yes.” It was a blatant lie. Things were great between him and his second.
Randa patted his hand as she walked by. “Then you’ll have to make up and apologize for being an ass.”
Lincoln stared after her. If only she knew. If only she knew.
* * * *
Much, much later in the evening, while nocturnal creatures hunted and the rest of the world slept, Lincoln sat in his home office. It wasn’t a full office, one corner of the basement they’d remodeled several years ago when they first bought the house. He’d transformed the space into a partial man cave. He had his big-screen TV and exercise equipment, but that was about as manly as it got.
He studied the file on his desk. Matteo’s sober face stared up at him from the glossy page. Lincoln dragged his fingers through his close-cropped hair and huffed. The man had left hours ago. Actually as soon as Randa went to sleep, Matteo left, and Lincoln made sure he put her to bed good and proper.
Leaning back in his chair, he smirked. He loved the welcome-home sex they shared. It never ceased to amaze him how passionate his wife could be—something he’d missed years before when he tried to hide his true nature from her.
For years, he’d known his life needed more than one woman. Not that he didn’t love his wife any less, just that he didn’t know how to tell her he’d lived and wanted to continue a polyamorous lifestyle.
However, when the truth came out, it nearly destroyed his marriage and did irreparable harm to Randa. Matteo was right. Lincoln was responsible for taking a great joy from his wife.
If he hadn’t lied and tried to keep Lucy a secret, he’d have a son or daughter about six right now. Lincoln dropped his head in his hands. But he had lied, and he would never know the joy of having a child of his own with R
anda. Lucy took that from them.
Lucy, the young, vibrant, too-possessive woman he should never have taken as a mistress all those years ago. He enjoyed her passion. But as the months progressed, Lincoln knew the relationship wouldn’t last.
Once he learned Randa was pregnant, just going into her second trimester, he broke things off with Lucy. That was disastrous. The breakup pushed Lucy over the edge, and she attacked Randa.
He’d come home to find Randa a bloody mess and Lucy sitting in the corner with the knife across her lap, wearing a too-serene smile on her face.
That was the day he knew he needed to change.
He pressed the heels of his hands to his burning eyelids, hoping the pressure would stem the moisture bubbling beneath. Lucy had destroyed them, but Selena helped rebuild them. If she hadn’t come along, neither he nor his wife would be where they were now.
When he first met Selena, the youthful nurse’s aide, she was there to help care for Randa after the attack, miscarriage, and surgery. And the devastating news that having another child would be a difficult battle.
Randa was so angry and hurt there was no way she would let him near her, but he couldn’t leave her helpless, so he found Selena. She was the one who stayed while Randa recuperated.
And he sought counseling, which helped him see what his choices were. Either give Randa the same opportunity he had for a partner, or walk away from his ten-year marriage.
Well, he wasn’t about to walk away from his marriage. He loved her too much, and she deserved the very best from him.
He blew out a breath. They would get through this. He could never tell Randa he’d forced Matteo to leave. That the reason her paramour wouldn’t be there when she woke in the morning was due to that fistfight because Matteo lied about his past. She didn’t need to know why the man left.
Yet he still didn’t know how to tell her about Melodee. And Matteo knew his deepest, darkest secret. Cold sluiced through his veins. Would Matteo spill the beans?
Lincoln closed the file, opened the bottom drawer of his desk, placed the folder inside, and locked the drawer. He’d take the file to his office in the morning and put it in his wall safe there. It wouldn’t do for Randa to find this information.
Sex, Lies, and Joysticks Page 6
