“I used Hollyoak as collateral for the loan, and if I can’t pay up I’ll lose the house and you all will lose the school.”
“Then what’s to be done, sir?”
“So my question for you, Robert, is—when is the earliest we can sheer and get the maximum at market for the wool?
Robert scratched the side of his bristly face. “I reckon it’d be at least mid-October. Before that, it’ll all be scratch and worth naught.”
John grimaced. That’s what I was afraid of. I’ve got to pay the loan by the end of October. And you’re certain we couldn’t start sheering now?”
“But it’s not just about sheering. You’ve got to bundle and transport the wool ta market. Then there’s the auction and how long is it before you usually get paid after that?” Robert asked.
John nodded. “A good two weeks later, if we’re lucky.”
“Aye. My point exactly.”
John just looked at the sheep and nodded. He turned and clapped Robert on the shoulder. “Keep up the good work, my man. I’ll just have to find another way, I guess.”
He turned to go.
“Good luck with ye, Your Grace. You’re a clever man. You’ll find your way.”
As John walked back through the village to his horse, he looked at the simple cottages. What kind of lives did these people live he wondered? Growing up in wealth and privilege he had given little thought to the day to day lives of his workers until they pleaded with him for a school. Now, whenever he came through the village he became increasingly aware of the plight of his workers. The cottages were shabby and drear and the children playing in the street were poorly dressed and certainly in need of an education.
It made him more determined than ever to find a solution to his problem, and it opened the door for thought about other aspects of his worker’s lives.
He mounted his horse and rode out of the village. But he couldn’t face going home. Instead, he directed his horse toward the open fields where he could let his horse loose and ride the rolling hills at full speed. He needed to feel the exertion of the steed under him—the wind blowing through his hair, scouring his face and stinging his eyes. He rode until both he and the horse were exhausted and he stopped at the top of a hill and dismounted. He stood looking back. In the far distance, he could see Haverford House. It looked small and insignificant. That was how he felt. He sat on the grass and let the horse graze as he struggled to understand.
What would his father make of all of this if he were alive? Never in his family’s history was there every any diminishing of Haverford. It had always been a strong bulwark in all of southeast Britain. He should never have built that house for Annabel. But how could he not? She was his life. She was his love. He felt at the time that he should spare nothing to please her. But then came the blackleg and there was nothing to be done but take the loan from his father-in-law.
Of course, in hindsight, everything always looked different. Could he have done other than he did? Would he? And in all honesty, he would not. He had made his best judgement and even though the outcome was not to be desired, he would have done none other than what he did.
Chapter 12
Finally, feeling somewhat rested and a little more at peace, John remounted his horse and started toward home.
He had no solution, but he was not about to give up.
As he neared the stable, he saw Susan outside in the kitchen garden with Elizabeth. She appeared to be showing Elizabeth about gardening, and it gladdened his heart.
After handing his horse to the groom he wandered over to where Susan was kneeling beside Elizabeth in the cucumber section.
“Planning supper?” John asked with a chuckle.
Susan and Elizabeth looked up. Susan was happy to see John, but Elizabeth looked a little uncertain and she shrank back behind Susan.
John knelt down and reached out his hand to his daughter, but she didn’t respond.
Susan turned around and took Elizabeth in her arms and brought her forward to face her father.
“Elizabeth why don’t you show your father what we just found? I think he’d like to see.”
The child leaned down and lifted a leaf and picked up a green caterpillar and held it out to John.
“It’s a squishy bug,” she said proudly displaying her prize.
“Is that my dinner?” he joked.
Elizabeth squealed. “No-o-o. You don’t eat bugs.” She jumped up and down.
“Then it must be your dinner,” he continued.
“No, I don’t eat them either. You’re just being silly.”
“I know. I am silly aren’t I?” John said, standing.
Elizabeth went back to searching for more caterpillars.
“How’s she doing? She certainly seems more outgoing that she was.”
“We’re doing just fine. And I can’t tell you how happy I am to be here with her. It’s been a real joy. But when you have a chance I would love to get together with you so we can discuss your school project. It would help me greatly if I could get some idea about what you want to accomplish with the school, and what the number and age range of the students will be.”
John’s face clouded. “That will have to wait for the time being. I’m still uncertain as to if or when we might be able to plan that.”
“Oh,” Susan said, somewhat surprised.
“I must go. It was lovely to see you both. I guess I’ll be seeing you at supper?”
Susan nodded, and John disappeared into the house.
When John got back to the library there was a letter waiting for him on his desk. He looked at the return address. It was from Sir Bentley Cavendish—and old university chum. He opened the envelope.
2 October, 1830
My Dear Friend John,
What are you up to, you old scoundrel?
The good wife and I are taking the Dover packet boat to Calais for a week in Paris. And we were thinking to stop by for a few days’ visit on our way home. Would that be agreeable to you, old man? Would love to catch up and drink a toast or two to old times.
“Oh, and we’ll be accompanied by my wife’s brother, Sir Andrew Cull and his (ah hum) companion, Miss Fiona Fitzwilliam (but everyone calls her Fitz).
We should be your way about mid-October. Do let us know if that is not convenient.
We’ll bring a couple cases of champers from gay old Paree. Let’s make a grand old time of it shall we?
Ever your devoted friend,
Bentley Cavendish
John put down the letter and scowled. How awkward, he thought. Couldn’t be worst timing. He would be right in the midst of sheering and marketing the wool. And he might also be in the process of losing Hollyoak.
But Bentley was an old friend whom he’d not seen in a long time. And, with all his troubles, it might be nice to have a diverting break and enjoy himself a little. However, he knew nothing about Sir Andrew Cull and his companion. But if they were Bentley’s traveling companions they must be all right, as he didn’t think Bentley would have invited them to travel to Paris with them if they weren’t.
John stood from his desk and went to the library window that overlooked the kitchen garden where Susan was still instructing Elizabeth. He couldn’t help but study her. What a fine woman she was he thought. The more he observed her, the more he began to appreciate her many fine qualities. She was gracious, intelligent, and certainly caring, as evidenced by the wonderful changes he was seeing in his daughter.
He was reminded of Susan and his Aunt’s suggestions that he take a more active role in his daughter’s upbringing. And that set him thinking… if he were to spend more time with Elizabeth he would also be spending more time with Miss Susan. And how could that be bad?
When Susan took a break while Elizabeth was having her lunch, she went to her suite to pick up a book. As she entered she was surprised to find a letter on her desk. It must have come by post when she was out in the garden.
She opened it. It was from Katherine and w
as short and sweet. It simply asked Susan to come to their house for a visit as soon as urgently possible.
Urgently, Susan contemplated. What could that mean? It slightly worried her, as she was afraid that Katherine might have become ill.
She went directly to Aunt Clarissa’s room and knocked.
“Yes?”
Susan went inside, still holding the letter.
“Aunt Clarissa, I’ve had a note from a dear friend who requests my urgent attendance.”
“Oh, my. Is there a problem?” Aunt asked.
“I have no idea. The note is vague, but I know my friend, Katherine would not summon me like this unless it was urgent.”
“Then you must go see her this very afternoon.”
“Would that be all right? Could you or Charlotte care for Elizabeth in my absence?”
“Of course, my dear. And you will need transportation. Just tell groom I approve your use of the trap for the afternoon and he will prepare it for you.”
“Oh, thank you, dear Aunt Clarissa.”
Susan took a quick bite of lunch in the kitchen and then availed herself of the trap and headed for Ash. When she arrived at the cobbler’s shop she knocked at the family’s door and anxiously waited for someone to answer. When the door finally opened Susan was shocked. There stood Daniel, smiling like a clown.
“Daniel, what are you doing here? I thought you were to be gone for many months yet.”
“What? No hello, dear Daniel? No, how glad I am to see you? Just a gruff what are you doing here?”
Susan laughed. “Yes, I’m sorry. It just took me so much by surprise. Katherine made no mention in her note that you were back. And I was worried she might be ill.”
“I asked her not to tell you. I wanted it to be a surprise.”
Daniel was still dressed in his uniform. He looked wonderful and her heart filled with joy in seeing him.
“Come in, then. No point in standing in the doorway.”
She followed him down the hall and to the sitting room, where Katherine and their mother were also seated.
Katherine stood up and went over to give Susan a hug.
“You rascal, surprising me like this,” Susan said, pinching Katherine’s cheek.
“It’s all his fault,” Katherine said, pointing to Daniel. “He wouldn’t let me tell you he was back.”
“Guilty,” he said, raising his hand.
“How did this happen? I didn’t expect to see you for ages. And did you get my letter?” she asked.
“I didn’t. Did you get mine?”
“I certainly did, and I answered it just before I moved to Haverford.”
“Navy mail is very slow. And with us at sea, it may take months. But the reason I’m here at all is that we got called back to port unexpectedly. It seems we have a new mission and needed to be outfitted differently. So here I am—with shore leave for a week.”
“How delightful,” Susan said. “But you know I’m employed now and not as free to visit as I was previously. I have the most adorable charge now—a sweet five-year-old named Elizabeth. She’s the daughter of the Duke.”
“How did you get here?” Katherine asked.
“I borrowed a trap, why?”
“Why don’t the two of you go for a drive? Take a walk along the river. It’s such a lovely autumn afternoon then you can come back for tea.”
Susan looked over at Daniel, who was smiling and nodding.
“That sounds lovely,” she said.
Daniel took the reins and flicked them to get the horse to move. They drove mostly in silence until they reached Susan’s favorite river walk.
Daniel tied the horse and they began their promenade. He took her hand in his and gazed into her eyes as they started out.
Susan was still reeling with the surprise of seeing Daniel, but she was enjoying herself immensely. It felt nice to have her hand in Daniel’s, and it was also nice to be walking along in silence. She’d come to realize that to be truly silent with someone and at the same time to be in total peace was a rare gift. She couldn’t help but remember walking along this very path with Sir Jasper and enduring his incessant chatter.
“It’s so wonderful seeing you again, Susan,” Daniel finally said. “I’d resigned myself to a much longer absence, and now here we are.”
“Then you missed me?” Susan asked.
Daniel looked into her eyes and smiled. “Need you ask?”
Susan returned the smile. Daniel squeezed her hand.
“Susan, I’ve given a lot of thought to what we discussed previously about my life at sea.
“You said so in your letter and I really appreciate you giving consideration to the matter.”
“Susan, it’s very important that you answer me truthfully, and tell me what is truly in your heart.”
“Of course.” She looked at him with some concern. “Why would I not?”
“Good. Because these are my thoughts. I really care a great deal for you Susan, and if your feelings were as intense as mine, and you agreed to marry me, then I would be willing to give up my naval commission and seek a land position so that we might create a life together.”
Susan was struck silent as she integrated what he’d just said.
“Marriage? Are you asking me to marry you, Daniel?”
“Only if you feel completely ready.”
“Oh, Daniel… this is so sudden.”
“I know. And I’m sorry—it’s just that we have so little time together.” He stopped walking, released her hand, and turned to her. “But we can wait. I absolutely do not wish to rush you. It’s just that it’s so difficult in my situation. I have no time or way to court you casually, and I wanted to express my feelings so that you would know exactly where I stood.”
Susan’s heart and mind were racing. She was trying to reconcile all of her emotions. But the one thing she knew right now was she did not want to rush into this. She’d just made a commitment to Elizabeth and she wanted to give the girl at least a year or two before considering leaving her. And as much as she was attracted to, and admired Daniel, their recent re-acquaintance was too recent and she felt there was not enough bedrock to their relationship.
“I’m not ready yet, Daniel,” Susan finally said. “But please let me acknowledge your willingness to sacrifice your navel career for us. But I think we both need more time.”
“But you’re not rejecting me entirely?” he asked.
“Oh, Daniel, no. Not at all. And, in fact, I want to encourage you in the strongest terms. But it’s just too soon. I hope you understand.”
Susan went on to tell him about Elizabeth and how much she was helping the child. And how she wanted to give her the best start in life that she could, but that would take some time.
“I fully understand,” Daniel said. “And I honor you for your dedication, and it makes me love you all the more, for I know what a good mother you would be to our children.”
That embarrassed Susan somewhat and she looked away and started walking again.
Daniel caught up with her and took her hand.
“I hope I’ve not scared you off. You must forgive me for my haste. But I promise to be patient and totally there for you.”
Susan looked up to him again. “Thank you, Daniel. I really appreciate that.”
The late afternoon light was beginning to fade and, with it being autumn, there was a definite chill in the air.
“Shall we head back? I think I’m ready for tea,” Susan asked.
“Yes, and if I know Katherine, she’ll be busy baking some wonderful treat for us.”
Tea was chatty, as Susan told the family all about her new job and how adorable the young Elizabeth was. She talked about her walks and how charming and respectful the Duke was to her. And she gushed about Aunt Clarissa and how none of that would have happened without her respect for, and understanding of, Susan.
It was starting to get dark and Susan was concerned about getting back to Haverford House. And before too long s
he would be required to bathe and put Elizabeth to bed.
Susan stood. “I really must be going. Thank you all for a wonderful afternoon.”
Katherine spoke up with a sly smile. “Daniel, will you show Miss Susan to the door please?”
“Of course.” He was already standing and offered Susan his arm. But before taking it, Susan wrapped the shawl around her shoulders.
“Shall we?” she asked, taking Daniel’s arm.
As they were leaving the house Daniel grabbed his bicorn captain’s hat and took it with him to the door.
He helped her up into the trap and before she left he took her hand.
“My dearest Susan, I’ve had no opportunity to shop for something special for you. And as I’ll be leaving again shortly, and I don’t expect us to meet again this trip, I want to leave you with a token of my affection.”
“Oh?”
Daniel took his hat and removed the folded ribbon cockade that was attached to the side of the hat that denoted he was a captain.
“I wish you to have this. Wear it in remembrance of me.”
“How lovely, thank you. But you won’t be court marshalled and forced to walk the plank because you gave this to me, will you?” she asked teasingly.
Daniel laughed. “If so, then I shall be honored to go to my death for your sake.”
He handed her the rosette. “May I?” He asked, leaning in for a kiss on her cheek.
“You may.”
Chapter 13
The next morning, Susan and Elizabeth were in the girl’s room where she was receiving instruction in the alphabet using wooden blocks with letters on the sides. They were arranging the letters into various simple words and Elizabeth’s little hands were deftly rearranging the blocks to make new words that Susan suggested.
There was a knock at the door and John came inside.
“Good morning to you both. May I see what you two are doing?” he asked.
“Of course, Your Grace. We are doing our ABC’s and beginning to form words.” She turned to Elizabeth. “Show your father.”
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