‘Apart from the fact I’m happily married to someone else.’ Helena ran her fingers along the delicate mother-of-pearl pattern on the box. ‘Oh, and I have three children.’
‘Tell me honestly: do you still feel anything for him? Because I just get the feeling there’s something you aren’t telling me.’
‘I’m fond of him and the memories we shared, but no, Sadie, there’s nothing more.’
‘Really? I mean, is it total coincidence your first-born son shares a name with that of your first love?’
‘Sadie, for goodness’ sake! I just happened to like the name, that’s all.’
‘And you swear you haven’t seen him since?’
‘Please, Sadie, you’re like a dog gnawing at a bone. Can we just leave it alone?’ Helena begged her.
‘Okay. Sorry, sweetie.’
Helena stood up. ‘I’d better go and help William round up the kids. Do you want to come to Adonis Falls with us, or are you happy to laze around the pool?’
‘I’ll stay here and get ready for dinner with our very own Adonis, thanks,’ Sadie said with a wink as she watched Helena leave. ‘See you later.’
The journey to the waterfall through the mountains was rocky and hazardous, just as Helena remembered it. The road was very narrow, full of huge potholes and steep inclines.
‘Thank God this isn’t our car,’ declared William, as he steered skilfully through the clouds of dust. ‘There’d be nothing left of the tyres, not to mention the suspension.’
‘It’s like being on a roller-coaster, Mummy,’ shouted Immy excitedly as she bumped along unperturbed on the seat behind. Alex sat next to her with his hands grasping the edge of the seat tightly, white-faced and staring straight ahead. In the seats at the back, Chloë had her eyes closed with her earphones in and Fred was, incredibly, asleep with his head resting on her arm.
‘Did you drive along here when you came before?’ asked William.
‘No,’ Helena said with a laugh, ‘I was on the back of a moped! Can you believe it?’
‘I’m amazed you survived to tell the tale. Who was the driver?’
There was a short pause before she said, ‘Alexis.’
William gripped the steering wheel a fraction tighter. ‘Perhaps later, you would have the grace to tell me exactly what went on between you and him,’ he said, lowering his voice to a grim whisper. ‘It’s obvious he thinks there’s unfinished business between the two of you. And I’m not particularly keen on the feeling that I’m being cuckolded right under my very nose!’
‘William, please! The children might hear you!’ Helena whispered back desperately.
William jammed on the brakes, and brought the car to a sudden halt. ‘Right, kids, looks like we’re here.’
They were deep in a valley, the mountains rising majestically on either side of them. Helena got out and helped Immy and Fred from their seats, trying to swallow down the lump in her throat, so they wouldn’t see she was near to tears.
William had already marched off ahead of them to the entrance, and she knew to leave him alone. She was used to his sudden bursts of anger, and normally he cooled down quickly and was apologetic and repentant. Besides, after her chat with Sadie, she understood why. William was feeling threatened, and she knew she needed to put his mind at rest.
‘Has everyone got their towels? Okay, let’s go.’
Helena took hold of Fred’s hand, Immy clung on to Chloë, and Alex brought up the rear alone.
William had already bought their tickets. He picked up Fred and hugged him. ‘You ready to go jump into some very cold water, little chap?’
‘Yes, Dad, I ready.’
They bumped fists and set off for the waterfalls.
Slithering down the precarious rocks, Helena found herself up to her middle in clear, icy-cold water as her little ones paddled around her. William and Alex had swum to the edge of the pool and were now climbing the rock so they could jump in. Chloë was sitting sunning herself on the edge, attracting admiring glances from the male population around her.
‘I’m jumping in – watch!’ Alex waved at her from the slippery ledge, twenty feet above the pool, then jumped and landed with a huge splash.
‘Go, Alex!’ clapped Chloë excitedly as he resurfaced. ‘That was SO cool.’
‘I’m going up to the next rock above,’ he called as he swam back towards it.
Helena looked up and saw how high it was. ‘Please take care, Alex,’ she shouted to him, as William prepared to take the plunge from the lower rock. She thought how youthful he was for forty-five; yet to gain a single grey hair on his dark head, and his slim body was lithe and toned.
‘Go, Daddee!’ shouted Immy, splashing around with Fred excitedly. William waved at them, then jumped, and his children cheered him.
‘Me jump now, Mummy,’ said Fred, starting to paddle towards the rocks. Helena pulled him back. ‘When you’re bigger, darling.’
‘Wanna go now!’
William swam up to his son and held him aloft. ‘You want to jump in?’
‘Yes!’
‘Okay, here goes!’ He lifted Fred high above his head, and let him go. Fred’s water-wings stopped him from going under, and he yelped with happiness.
‘Look, Helena, Alex is going to jump from that really high rock,’ Chloë shouted from behind her. ‘Will he be okay?’
‘I hope so,’ she said, as Alex leapt off. Chloë shrieked and clapped as he came up from under the water and swam towards them.
‘Rupes said Alex was a wimp and a nerd, but I’d like to see him doing that,’ said Chloë to Helena.
‘Alex is neither. He’s got incredible courage, in all sorts of ways,’ Helena said as he swam towards them, panting but triumphant.
‘Did you see me, Mum?’ Alex asked her.
‘Yes. You were fantastic, darling.’
‘You were. I was wondering’ – Chloë bit her lip, looking gorgeously vulnerable – ‘if I tried from the lower rock, would you hold my hand as we jump, Alex?’
‘’Course. Come on, then.’
Helena noticed the look of pride on her son’s round face as he led Chloë towards the rocks. And suddenly, she realised why Alex had been acting strangely over the past couple of days; he obviously had a crush on Chloë.
There was an enormous splash as they jumped off together, and a cheer from the crowd watching below.
Twenty minutes later, Immy had had enough. ‘Mummy! My hair is wet and I’m shivery and thirsty, and I want to get out,’ she wailed.
‘You stay with Fred,’ Helena called to William as she dragged her daughter out of the pool. ‘I’ll get some drinks, and meet you up on the terrace.’
Helena collected some cans from the car, and sat down with Immy on a shady bench under an olive tree. She closed her eyes for a moment, remembering the time long ago when Alexis had brought her here. Then, it wasn’t so much of a tourist attraction, simply a place of beauty, known mainly just to the few locals who lived close by. They too had jumped off the rocks together and swum in the deep, clear water.
And here, on the edge of the deserted pool, in a place of legend, Helena had crossed the threshold into womanhood.
‘Mummy? Are you listening to meee?’
‘Of course I am, darling.’ Helena dragged her attention back to Immy.
‘I said, I’m hungry and I need a packet of salt and vinegar crisps.’
‘We’ll be having lunch soon, so you’ll have to wait. Look, here come the others.’
‘I can show it to you if you like,’ Alex was saying to Chloë. ‘It’s a wicked book, and the copy Angus has is a first edition.’
‘I’d love to see it.’
‘Great. I’ll find it when we get home.’
‘Cool.’
Alex was so different today, Helena thought. His lovely eyes were sparkling and his animated face shone with happiness as he chatted with his stepsister, glancing at her furtively with obvious adoration.
‘Wow, look at that,’
Chloë giggled, pausing by a statue of a naked Adonis and Aphrodite in an embrace. ‘He’s . . . er . . . quite impressive!’ She read out the words engraved in English on the stone plaques beside it. ‘Adonis and Aphrodite, the god and goddess of love and beauty. Legend has it that they lived here together with their many children. Ladies born infertile who wish to become pregnant must touch Adonis’ appendage, and will have many children thereafter.’
‘Don’t you dare, Chloë,’ William said, bringing up the rear with Fred. ‘And don’t let your mum anywhere near it either, Alex. That’s the last thing we need, isn’t it, darling?’
Helena swallowed hard, and nodded.
‘Absolutely.’
ALEX’S DIARY
18th July 2006
I flew today!
But I wasn’t on a plane, and nothing but my arms were propelling me through the sky. I flew through the air, as the One I Love watched me, then cheered and clapped as I landed, plop, in the water.
No matter that my tummy is now covered in red marks where my flab made frictional contact with the water, or that I’ve twisted my ankle from losing my footing on those slippery rocks. Or the massive bruise on my face that I’ve no idea how I got, but it might have been her elbow making contact as we held hands and jumped off together.
Pain is meaningless against the joy of the look on her face. I am her hero. I am her protector. She thinks I am COOOOL.
She likes me.
And it helped that the paralysed-lips thing seemed to vanish in the ball-petrifying coldness of Adonis’ Bidet. Perhaps there is some magic in that water as, when she spoke to me, for the first time, I could actually speak back.
So, we talked and it turned out that she likes reading. She wants to be a fashion journalist if she can’t be a model and is very up on all the latest editions of Vogue and Marie Claire.
Very soon, she will be stepping into my Broom Cupboard to see the copy of Far from the Madding Crowd I have found on the crowded shelves of Angus’ library. She says she’s reading it for GCSE. Well, she says she’s not got that far into it, but she likes the film with Alan Bates and Julie Christie and she really rates Terence Stamp as ‘Captain Troy’. (I’d go for Alan Bates as ‘Gabriel Oak’ myself, but there’s no accounting for taste.) I wish I could give her the book as a present. But my mother might not be too chuffed as it’s a very old copy and probably worth a fortune.
And . . . she’ll have got my poem by now.
I nipped upstairs and put it in her bedroom whilst she was in the shower when we got back from the waterfalls.
She’s probably reading it right now.
I didn’t sign it, of course, but she’ll know who it’s from. I paraphrased from the love letters I found in Angus’ photograph box and borrowed some metaphor from Keats. Personally, I think it sounded pretty good.
I’m also comforting myself that size isn’t everything. Look at that Formula One goblin and his seventeen-foot-tall wife. Or all those tiny jockeys with their supermodel girlfriends. If you love someone, you don’t care how big or small they are.
Besides, I have lots of room for future growth, and some money stashed away in a building society which could buy me some trainers with serious lifts until I do. I suppose it helps if you are as rich as Croesus, but like size, money isn’t everything. And I have plenty of room for growth in that department too.
It turns out that her school isn’t so far from the one I am going to in September. Perhaps we could meet for tea on a Sunday, having written to each other feverishly during the week, professing our undying love . . .
Suddenly things are starting to look up.
And perhaps this holiday won’t be the nightmare I thought it would be only this morning.
Oh, help. There is someone knocking on my Broom Cupboard door. It must be her. I take a deep breath and hobble over to open it.
ι
Ten
‘Hi, Alex. I’ve come to see that book you told me about. I brought Rupes, too.’
Chloë smiled up at Rupes and led him into the tiny room by the hand.
‘Oh, er, right.’ Alex reached up to take the book from the shelf, then handed it to Chloë.
‘Wow, it’s beautiful. Isn’t it, Rupes?’ Chloë turned the fragile, leather-bound book over in her hands.
‘S’pose so; not really my kind of thing, books.’
‘Really?’ Chloë looked up at him. ‘I thought you were quite into . . . poetry?’
Rupes shrugged. ‘More of an outdoor man myself.’
Chloë giggled. ‘Don’t be coy, Rupes. It’s good that a man has a sensitive side to him and you can’t deny that you have.’
Rupes looked nonplussed. ‘Er, yeah, s’pose.’ He glanced at Alex’s bed and picked up the ragged rabbit lying on the pillow. ‘And what have we here?’
‘Sorry, could you put it down? I don’t like people touching him,’ said Alex sharply.
‘Think you’d better lose that before you go to boarding school, mate.’ Rupes raised his eyebrow at Chloë and gave a short ‘tssk’, as he dangled the rabbit by its ears. ‘The other lads might give you a rough time. Am I right, Chloë?’
Alex snatched the rabbit from Rupes’ fingers and held it to him defensively. ‘To be honest, Rupes, I couldn’t give a shit, but thanks for the warning, anyway.’
‘Lots of girls in my dorm still have teddies and stuff,’ said Chloë kindly.
‘Exactly. They’re girls. Hear you jumped from a high rock today, Alex. That how you got that bruise?’
Alex shrugged mutely.
‘Well, I’m gonna set up some pool Olympics for us kids. Then you can show us all how great you are in the water. You on for it?’
‘Maybe.’
‘’Kay, see you later. You coming, Chloë?’
‘Yes. Thanks for showing us the book, Alex.’ She smiled at him. ‘See you at dinner.’
‘You’re looking very nice tonight, Sadie,’ William said, finding her alone on the terrace, knocking back a vodka.
‘Thank you, kind sir. One does one’s best,’ she said with a smile.
‘Mind if I join you? Helena’s taking a shower.’
‘Of course. I’d love to spend a few exclusive minutes with one of my favourite men,’ she said as he sat down next to her. ‘Look at that sunset. Just glorious.’
‘Yes. Amazing, isn’t it? In fact, the whole place is far more beautiful than I thought it would be, especially the house.’
‘It’s incredibly atmospheric and Helena’s done a fabulous job of making it feel like a home.’
‘Actually, while I’ve got you to myself, I wanted to ask you how you think Helena seems at the moment.’
‘She looks tired, but that’s probably because she’s been running round trying to get Pandora sorted for everybody.’
‘And . . . in the past few weeks?’
‘To be honest, William, I’ve hardly spoken to her. Work’s been so frantic, quite apart from my turbulent private life. Why? Do you think there’s something the matter?’
‘I just don’t know. Helena’s an expert at keeping her thoughts to herself. Even though we’ve been married for so long, she’s still something of an enigma. Especially on the subject of her past.’
‘And surely that’s part of her charm?’ Sadie reminded him. ‘Helena is the least neurotic woman I know. Perhaps inside she’s a seething morass of neediness, but she’d never allow anyone to see it.’
‘Exactly. She’s always in control.’ William took a sip of his wine. ‘But how can you possibly live with someone for all this time, and yet feel as if you still don’t really know them? That’s how I’m feeling about Helena right now. Has she ever spoken to you about this Alexis chap?’
‘You mean the Alexis who is arriving here at any second, and whom I’m going to do my best to seduce?’ She gave a wicked grin. ‘Apparently, they had a bit of a fling when she was staying at Pandora years ago, but I really don’t think it was much more than that.’
‘Really?’ Will
iam frowned. ‘I know you wouldn’t tell me, Sadie, even if she’d told you about it in gory detail.’
‘You’re right, I wouldn’t, but on Girl Scout’s honour, in this case I have nothing to tell.’
‘All I know is she’s even more distant than usual, and . . .’ He shook his head and sighed. ‘I just feel there’s something wrong.’
‘Hello, campers!’ Jules appeared on the terrace. ‘Bloody water’s stone cold. Could you ask the manager of this establishment to sort it before tomorrow?’
‘Hardly a problem in this heat, surely?’ said Sadie.
‘No, but it’s obvious the entire plumbing system is buggered. My loo doesn’t flush properly either.’
‘There are bound to be problems, Jules. It’s a very old house,’ William replied evenly.
‘Which will cost an arm and a leg to renovate, never mind the upkeep. Helena’s not expecting you to shell out for it, is she?’
‘Helena is a woman of means now. With Angus’ legacy, she’s quite capable of covering all the costs herself. By the way, have you heard from Sacha today?’ William changed the subject. ‘Has he said when he’s coming?’
‘I haven’t switched on my mobile. I’m on holiday, even if he isn’t,’ Jules replied, with an edge to her voice.
‘I’m sure he wants to be here, Jules, but perhaps he’s under a lot of pressure. Things aren’t as easy in the City as they used to be. And Sacha did a very brave thing by setting up on his own when he came back from Singapore.’
‘Kalispera. Good evening, everyone.’ With timing as immaculate as his freshly laundered white shirt and brown chinos, Alexis arrived on the terrace. He placed two bottles of wine and a large bunch of white roses on the table. ‘Sadie, William,’ he smiled at them in turn. ‘And may I be introduced?’ He held out his hand to Jules, who visibly lost a layer of frost as she allowed him to take her hand in his. ‘Alexis Lisle.’
‘Jules Chandler. Are you Cypriot or English?’
‘I am Cypriot, but my family line was begun by an Englishman, who came here in the eighteenth century and married my seven-times-great-grandmother. So, we still bear his surname.’
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