She closed the notebook and set it on the table. “Wedding stuff. I just hope we aren’t forgetting anything.”
“If you didn’t kick me out, I could’ve helped. Sometimes a second set of eyes is all you need.”
Mom snickered again. “I didn’t kick you out.”
“Well, what would you call it then?”
“I encouraged you to get out of the house and have fun. Did you?”
“Maybe,” I mumbled, pouting.
“You’re not a very good liar, Brielle.”
“Fine. It was a little bit of fun,” I unwillingly admitted, kicking off my sandals, pulling my feet up onto the cushion. Despite my tight jeans, it was comfortable. It had been so long since I was still dressed instead of in pajamas at that time of night. The clock on the cable box underneath the television read eleven minutes until ten. When did my life become so damn boring?
She wrapped her arm around my back. “Since when do you only have a ‘little bit of fun’ with Joe Sullivan?”
I sighed. “Mom…” She’d get the hint, right?
“You don’t have to answer. I already know the truth. You always have a great time when the two of you are together. Deny it all you want, but everyone sees how different you are with him, and he with you. One of these days, you’re going to have to tell me what happened. None of it makes sense.”
Great! Now everyone was talking about me? “It’s complicated.”
“Yeah, you’ve said that before. Multiple times. I still don’t get it, though.” She stroked my hair.
“What don’t you get? Sometimes people grow apart.”
“You’re right. They do. Sometimes that’s just an excuse, though.” She couldn’t have known. She was just trying to get me to tell her why I walked away from Joey, but I wasn’t going to play into it. She didn’t need the heartache. Mom placed a gentle kiss on my head. “I’ll leave you alone, but I have one more question.” Questions were never any good when someone announced them first. I squeezed my eyes shut, hoping it wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be. “Did he kiss you goodnight before he let you out of his truck like he always does?”
“Mom!” I cried, untangling myself from her and sitting up.
“Well?”
“That’s it.” I stood and grabbed my shoes. “I’m going to bed.” The sound of her laughter followed me all the way to my bedroom. Once I was safely behind the closed door, I ripped off my shirt and jeans, throwing them on the floor. I yanked on an old t-shirt, then climbed into bed and under the blankets. “No, Mom. He didn’t kiss me,” I spoke softly to the empty space, “but I wouldn’t have stopped him if he had tried.” Where Joey was concerned, I had no willpower whatsoever.
The day’s events replayed in my head, prohibiting me from falling asleep. Thinking about Maddie didn’t help matters. She represented such a huge piece of a puzzle I saw as my future all those years ago. It seemed almost as if everything I ever wanted was still a possibility. The tricks a mind could play on someone were extraordinary and, unfortunately, excruciatingly painful. Trying to hang onto the high from the night, I texted Joey, using Maddie as the perfect excuse. However, it didn’t work as expected. Joey bringing up our first time may have been the dagger to the heart I deserved. Not that it was ever very far away in my memory, but I tried extremely hard to keep it buried. He hauled that bitch out and threw it on the ground right in front of me.
Thankfully, Lex came bursting into my room.
“Whoever you are texting is nowhere near as important as I am,” she said, joining me in the bed. She had brought along a full bottle of whiskey from Dad’s stash and two shot glasses. “I had a really bad night and need my big sister, so say your goodbyes.” Without a thought, I said goodnight to Joey and put my phone on the table next to the bed. It only irritated me a little when Lex sent a few texts after the fact. Since she was obviously upset about something, I let it slide.
She told me that, despite the desperate attempt of the whole emergency department, two young people were sent to the morgue. I understood the heartache all too well and accompanied her in drowning her sorrows. In general, people were under the impression healthcare workers were able to do their jobs because they didn’t feel the pain of the patients and their families. It was quite the opposite. We needed hearts bigger and stronger than the one we were given at birth. The worst part for each and every one of us was holding back the tears while we tried to comfort them, but no one ever saw that.
Surprisingly, neither of us woke with a hangover. Good thing, too, because mom made plans for a good portion of the day. While I waited for Lex to finish in the bathroom, Dad knocked on my door.
“Come in,” I called.
He held out a long-stemmed red rose. “It’s been a long time since I found one of these when I went out to get the newspaper.”
Using the tips of my fingers and thumb, I carefully took the stem, avoiding the thorns. My legs felt like they were going to give out, so I backed up to sit on the bed. I vaguely heard Dad say something else before leaving the room. A tear ran down my cheek as I stared at the beautiful petals, reminiscing of all the times Joey had left me a flower. The first was the morning after I agreed to be his girlfriend.
Getting ready for school on a Thursday in the middle of October usually wasn’t something I tended to celebrate. That particular morning, however, I woke up, got showered and dressed, and had my hair and makeup just about finished by the time my alarm went off. Very rarely would I be found out of my bed before the snooze button was pressed at least three times. Not believing her eyes, Mom stole a second glance of the clock when I skipped into the kitchen.
“Well, aren’t we chipper this morning?” She sipped on a cup of coffee. I kissed her head on my way to the refrigerator. “So what changed after all these months of you two only being friends?”
I shrugged, grabbing the carton of milk. “He asked me to be his girlfriend, and I said yes.”
“That simple, huh?” Mom passed me the box of cereal as I sat down with a bowl and spoon.
“Yup.” I hadn’t intended to tell anyone just yet that Joey and I were dating, but it slipped out the moment I saw Mom. While I ate breakfast, my mom drank her coffee. We didn’t talk much. She was probably trying to figure out what to say.
Dad appeared in the kitchen, kissed Mom, and wished me good luck on my test. Before walking through the door to the garage, he turned back. “I heard a rumor Sullivan graduated from best friend to boyfriend status.”
Mom smirked at the glance I sent her. “Funny how that happens, huh?” I replied.
“Is this something that should concern me?”
“No, Dad.” I rolled my eyes and took my dishes to the sink. “I’m sure nothing will actually change.” The words hadn’t finished coming out of my mouth when the doorbell rang. He set his briefcase on the counter and walked to the door. Less than a minute later, Dad returned, Joey following.
“Hey,” Joey said, smiling bashfully. I’d never know him to be shy of anything or anyone.
“Hey. What’s up?” No matter how badly I wanted to play it off because my parents were in the room, I couldn’t hide how excited seeing him made me. Had he always done that to me?
“I wanted to give you this before school.” He held out a red rose.
My chest felt weird and my eyes watered. I had no idea what was going on with me, but I assumed my period had something to do with it. I quickly blinked away the moisture, taking the flower. It was beautiful. It was the most perfect rose I’d ever seen, and the first a boy had ever given me. Of course, we weren’t talking about just any boy, but I’d never heard of any other girl getting a rose from him. That had to mean something.
“Thanks,” I whispered, smelling the petals.
In the background, I heard shuffling. Mom pushed out her chair and went to the cabinet. She came over to where we stood and turned on the faucet, then handed me a long, thin vase. “I don’t ever get flowers,” she grumbled.
“Y
ou used to,” Dad responded, then picked up his briefcase and headed toward the door, looking over his shoulder. “Thanks a lot, Sullivan.”
“Want to walk to school? There’s still plenty of time.” Whether or not he heard my dad, I had no idea.
“Sure. Let me run upstairs and grab my bag.”
From that morning on, I found single roses all over the place a few times a week. Sometimes they’d be in my locker at school. Occasionally, they’d be on my front step or on my pillow. I never did figure out how he got them in my softball bag without me noticing. From time to time, a random stranger would hand me one when Joey was nowhere in sight. Once I started driving, they would be on my windshield or on my front seat. At college, I’d get the petals in an envelope with no return address or note. For my birthday or our anniversary, a larger bouquet would be waiting for me in my room at home or delivered to my dorm, wherever I happened to be at the time.
The morning and afternoon flew by. Mom, Lex, and I visited my grandmother. From what I heard, she’d been pestering my mom to bring me by. We brought some things to the caterer, Lex reviewing a few details with her. Their rings were ready to be picked up, so we did that, then grabbed a quick bite to eat. Mom wanted to stop by the mall to look at jewelry. Apparently, she was having second thoughts about the necklace she planned on wearing, but ended up sticking with it since nothing else really appealed to her. It was a gift from my dad, which meant it was absolutely beautiful. He spared no expense when it came to her.
Shortly after getting back to my parents’ house, Alexa asked me to go out and grab a drink with her and Vince. I told her they should go alone, but she insisted. They planned on doing something together the following night and wanted to spend some time with me. It never did anyone any good to argue with my sister so, to save myself the aggravation, I simply agreed.
“What’ll you do tomorrow night?” Lex asked me on our way down the stairs after getting ready. Vince would soon be there to pick us up. It was nice getting chauffeured around for a change.
“I’ll probably just hang out with Mom and Dad.”
“That’s boring.”
“Not really. It’s not like I see them all the time.”
When we reached the bottom of the stairs, she looked at me. “Why don’t you call Sullivan? I’m sure he’d be happy to entertain you for the evening.”
“Cute, Lex.”
“What? I’m serious. Even if he has something to do, I bet he’d change his mind quicker than you could ask.” The expression on her face was trouble. I’d seen it before and knew walking away would be best. “Fine. Whatever, BC!” she called out to my back.
I spun around as she took off running, leaving me no choice but to chase her. The witch ran into the kitchen, behind Mom, around the table, then back down the hallway. Mom hollered at us for knocking over a chair and not picking it up. Dad followed, wanting to know what was going on. Lex trapped herself in the living room, where I was able to tackle her to the couch.
“Why would you call me that?” I shouted. My legs wrapped around her lower body and I held her head in my arms.
“I was just curious to see if you’d light up when I said it, like how you do when Joe says it.” She squirmed, laughing almost to the point of not being able to breathe. “You don’t, by the way.”
I squeezed her tighter. “You’re going to have a hell of a time explaining to your kids someday why you have a black eye in all your wedding pictures!”
Still laughing and ignoring me, she blurts out, “I think you still have feelings for him.”
“Shut up, Lex!”
“You do! I knew it!”
“What the hell’s going on?” Dad questioned as he and Mom joined us.
“Make her take it back,” I cried, just like we were children all over again.
“Lex, what did you say to your sister?” Given the situation, Mom’s condescending tone sounded too sarcastic for my liking.
“That she still has feelings for Joe Sullivan.”
They weren’t even shocked. Nonchalantly, Dad said, “Leave your sister alone, Lex.” I grinned, feeling smug that Dad was taking my side. “We can’t make her see it if she doesn’t want to.”
“What?!” I snapped. How could Dad stab me in the back like that? “I’m not in love with Joey!”
“No one said anything about love, Brielle,” Mom added. “Lex simply pointed out it’s obvious you still, well…at least like him.”
“You three have all gone crazy in my absence.” Refusing to let my sister free, I readjusted to get a better grasp on her. She grew tired, not putting up much of a fight. The front door opened and closed, but I didn’t budge from my position.
“Holy shit!” Vince’s voice echoed. “I’m not even ashamed to admit in front of my soon-to-be in-laws how awesome this is.” Dad laughed, and Mom sighed. I realized how things looked from his vantage point.
“She’s not going to make it until Saturday,” I bitched at him.
“That’s okay. This is good.”
“My parents are right there,” Lex yelled at him.
“Like I said, don’t care.”
“He’s kinda creeping me out,” I whispered to Lex.
“It’s your own fault. Get the hell off me.”
We heard the door open again and the second Vince started talking, I knew Joey was with him. In the most serious voice I could muster, I threatened my sister. If she so much as hinted to Joey what was going on, I’d destroy her without regret.
As he came into view, my hold on Lex loosened and, eventually, I released her. She rolled onto the floor, appearing quite proud of herself. If there was ever a time I wished I could sink into the ground and never resurface, that was it. Joey casually strolled into the room, helping Lex to her feet.
“You know you’re fighting with fire, right?” he asked her.
“You should’ve been here. It was totally worth it,” she declared.
“Alexa…,” I growled. My threat seemed scary to me, but she only winked.
“Here.” Joey held out his hand, and I allowed him to pull me off the couch. He tucked a piece of my hair behind my ear. “Don’t let her get to you. She’ll never learn, BC.” Hearing him say that, Lex burst out into roaring laughter all over again. I convinced myself ending her was the only way to go. As I started to run after her again, Joey grabbed my waist. My entire body stilled at his touch, instinctively leaning toward him. Stupid, traitorous body! “Could you please do me a favor and not hurt her? I’d really hate to listen to Vince complain if something happened to her before the wedding.” I nodded. “Thanks. Let’s go get a drink. Seems as if you’ve had the same type of day I did.”
I swallowed. “Okay, but now I have to go fix my hair again.”
Joey shook his head, holding back a smile. “No, you don’t.” He released me, placing his hand on my lower back and leading me out the front door.
While we waited for Lex and Vince, we stood by the passenger side of the car. “Thank you for the rose this morning. It was really sweet.”
“I saw it and thought of you.” He randomly saw a rose on his way to work?
“I’m sorry you had a bad day,” I said.
“Don’t be. It’s perfect now.” Joey opened the door and gestured for me to get in. I hadn’t noticed Lex and Vince coming down the driveway or heard when he unlocked the car. Honestly, I didn’t really care about anything other than being with Joey. He was right. The day had turned out to be absolutely perfect.
However, I knew it wasn’t going to last. Aidan would be there in a few days and life would go back to the way it was. The void I daily suffered from would make an unwanted reappearance all too soon. Something nagged at me, though. Something that made it completely impossible to walk away from Joey.
“See,” Vince muttered under his breath, tapping my forearm with the back of his fingers. “Everything’s fine. Told you there was nothing to worry about.” Despite my concern about running into someone we knew, he took us to the
bar right down the road from the station. Quite a few people tended to stop there for a drink or a bite to eat on their way home after their shift. It wasn’t as if McCray’s rant got to me. It had more to do with him showing up and starting shit in front of BC and Alexa. It’d get ugly really fast.
“The night’s not over,” I remarked, glancing at the girls across the table. Their argument from earlier was long forgotten and they were getting along just fine. BC laughed at something her sister said, her smile accentuating her beautiful facial features. Since she’d come home, I noticed her mouth rarely formed the way it once had. She was content, but something was keeping her from being truly happy.
The waitress delivered the round of shots Vince had ordered and quickly left. “My turn,” BC blurted out, grabbing the glass closest to her and holding it up. We all did the same. “To the newest member of my family. You have to be one brave son of a bitch to voluntarily join us. I wish you the best of luck!” There was a collective chuckle around the table, a clang of glasses, then we drank the smooth amber liquid.
“It’s more of an honor, Brie,” Vince told her. “Your family is pretty awesome.”
Lex leaned over and kissed her fiancé. “You always say the right thing, babe.”
“On that note, I’m going to find the ladies’ room,” BC announced.
“Don’t go yet,” Lex begged. “Once I go, I won’t be able to stop.”
“You can stay. I’ll be back.” She stood, and Lex copied her. “Really. I’m good.” She pulled her cell from the back pocket of her jeans, checking the screen. “I guess I need to answer this anyway.” Lex plopped back into the chair as I watched BC walk away. The top she wore was low-cut in the back, but most of her exposed skin was covered by her soft brown hair. Right before slipping into the crowd, BC glanced over her shoulder and our eyes met. She paused long enough to grin, then walked out of sight.
“I want to take that damn phone and smash it into a million pieces,” Lex grumbled.
“Let her be,” Vince said, rubbing his thumb over Lex’s cheek. “I think she’s doing well…considering.”
Subtle Reminders Page 24
