by Katie Ford
When I drove up to my house, Mia’s car wasn’t in the driveway. Had I gotten the nights mixed up? Was she staying in Berkeley that night instead of with me?
No. We were meeting tonight. We talked about it this morning before we left for work. She hadn’t returned any of my texts, calls, or Pictogram messages all day.
Hurrying inside, I worried that something happened to her. An accident on the road. A crazed stalker. A million horrible possibilities flooded into my mind.
“Mia!” I called hoping she was there.
Pulling out my phone, I tried to call her again, but it went to voicemail. “Mia, call me, babe. Are you still coming over tonight?”
My nerves were rattling. Where was Mia?
Upstairs, I went into my bedroom, more and more fraught with worry. I clicked on the lights and froze in place, not believing my eyes.
Penny was lounging naked on my bed. Our bed. Mia’s and mine.
“What are you doing here?” I asked, mystified.
What the hell was going on?
Penny sat up, pleased to see me. “I got rid of that bitch like you wanted.”
“What? Where’s Mia?” I asked, too stunned to understand.
Penny grabbed the lingerie bag out of my hand. “Is this for me?” She held up the negligee, beaming. “You shouldn’t have, Theo.”
Before I could stop her, she slithered into the sheer baby doll top. Puckering her lips to me, she asked, “How do I look?”
I had been looking forward to seeing Mia in that nightie. With it on Penny, it only grossed me out. The bust was too loose around her small breasts dwarfing them and making them look even smaller. Looking away, I replied, “Penny, please. That’s for Mia. Take it off.”
She ignored me grabbing the remote and turning up the volume on the flat screen. Settling back on the pillows, she watched the screen enraptured.
A video had been playing the whole time. I whirled around to see what she was so interested in. It was Penny and I having sex.
How could that be possible? A long long time ago I slept with Penny, but it wasn’t taped.
Watching the screen in disgust, I demanded, “Penny, what the fuck is this?”
Penny sneered. “Mia isn’t the only one that can break into your surveillance videos.”
“Penny, you’re my assistant. You have all my passwords. It’s hardly breaking in,” I countered.
“Whatever!” Penny said. “The point is, Theo, I took old footage of you and another woman and paid someone to put my face in the video.” She smiled proud of herself.
How had I never suspected Penny was a complete nut job all these years?
She continued, “Doesn’t the video look good? I get so horny watching it.”
This was completely crazy. Penny needed mental help. At this point, I didn’t want to provoke her. Who knew what she was capable of?
“It’s too bad Mia didn’t like it when I showed it to her,” Penny pouted.
Gritting my teeth, I held in my anger and slowly backed out of the bedroom.
Penny called after me, “Theo! Where are you going?” Her voice sounded right on the edge of freaking out.
“I’m going downstairs to grab champagne to celebrate. Sit right there! Don’t move!” I lied.
Penny purred, “Oh, Theo! I knew you’d come around!”
I ran downstairs and out the front door, calling 911. “I’d like to report a break in,” I said calmly to the dispatcher.
The dispatcher took my information and reported that the police were on the way. In the meantime, I sat in my car waiting for them and thinking about how much Penny had cost me.
Mia. My Mia. She was going to be my wife. I had been so close to the dream life I never thought I wanted, but it was gone now. Just like that.
When the police came and took Penny away, she looked crazed refusing to cooperate with the police officers. “Theo! Theo! I love you!” she screamed as they put her in back of the squad car.
I couldn’t bear to look at her. As much as I wanted to hate her, I couldn’t. She was clearly sick.
Once they were gone, I jumped in my car, racing to get to Mia’s dorm. If she wouldn’t take any of my calls or answer any of my messages, my only choice was to try to talk to her in person.
If only Mia would just let me talk to her and explain, then everything would be cleared up. She’d see that it was all a misunderstanding, but when I got there, Mia didn’t answer the door.
“What do you want?” her roommate, Jill spat at me.
“Please just let me talk to Mia,” I pleaded trying to look around her to see if Mia was there.
“Mia isn’t here.” Jill tried to slam the door shut, but I put my hand on it.
“Please. Tell me where she is. If she’s here, tell her I’m here.” My voice began to unravel. “I love her. Please.”
Jill glowered at me with fury in her eyes. “I’m not going to tell you anything about Mia. What you did to her is unforgivable!”
“None of it is true!” I pleaded, but Jill slammed the door shutting me out.
How was I going to get Mia back if I couldn’t even see her, and she refused to take my calls?
Chapter 22
Mia
After reading the minutes from the Board meeting, I was inconsolable. Depression descended on me like thick gray clouds and wouldn’t let me go. Three days went by and I hardly got out of bed, only to use the bathroom and drink sips of water.
Jill sat on the edge of my bed, pleading for me to eat. None of the food she had snuck out of the cafeteria looked enticing enough. Sweet Jill even picked out all the marshmallows in a Lucky Charms box into a bowl hoping I’d nibble on the crunchy morsels. When that didn’t work, she piled Danish pastries on my desk.
But I just couldn’t eat. My appetite had dried up just like the love between Theo and me. There was just nothing left.
She told me that Theo had come by a few times begging to see me, but I never wanted to see him again. Jill was a good friend like that, blocking him from getting to me and supporting my decision.
Most of my time in bed, I let myself tumble into the bliss of sleep. Asleep, I couldn’t feel the ache in my chest and the uselessness of my grief. Asleep, my mind didn’t wander to the video of Theo with Penny. It was burned into my memory.
After the third day of seclusion, Jill pressed me to go back home. She even bought me the ticket and drove me to airport. By then, I was too weak to refuse, too mired in my sadness to object to my best friend’s requests.
Back home in Carpinteria, my mood slowly improved. Simply being out of Berkeley helped. There was nothing in my hometown to remind me of Theo. The ache in my body still throbbed with sadness, but the acute pain had waned. My mother saw how sallow and pale I looked upon my arrival. It was easy to stay in bed and tell her that I was just sick with a cold.
Brandon had written me an email asking if everything was okay. My response was vague and noncommittal saying that I was still not well. I’d considered working remotely to help my team out, but my mother forbade it demanding I take a full rest: mind and body.
A full week went by before bringing out the envelope that contained information on my father’s whereabouts. After running out of Pictogram the day Penny sent me the video, I ran back to Theo’s to grab a few things, one of which was the private investigator’s findings of my father.
My mother sat in the kitchen sipping coffee when I emerged from my room, holding the envelope. “Good morning, sunshine!” she said greeting me with a warm hug. The sun was streaming in through the windows and lit up her auburn hair beautifully. She looked so happy. It saddened me that what I was going to tell her might change that.
“Good morning, Mom,” I said sitting down at the kitchen table to a plate of eggs, bacon, and toast. “Thanks for breakfast.” It looked delicious, but my appetite hadn’t yet completely returned.
My mom smiled and patted my hand. “Of course! I missed having you home.”
I placed t
he envelope on the table. My mom looked at it and said, “What’s that? Something from school?”
“I have something to tell you.” My voice trembled when I spoke.
My mom, noticing the change in my voice, put down her mug of coffee. “What is it, Mia?”
“Mom, I want you to know that I am truly grateful for everything you have done for me, for raising me on your own. I never felt like I was ever missing out on anything because I had you.”
My mom’s eyes looked bleary as I talked. “Of course, honey. I love you.”
It was difficult to get out what I wanted to say, worried she would be angry or worse, hurt. “Theo hired a private investigator to find out about my dad. That envelope has all his information.”
My mom was silent, staring at the envelope as if it were alive but dormant, and at any moment, it would jump to life. She was barely audible when she said, “I’m sorry I never told you about him.” A teardrop spattered the kitchen table.
“No, Mom! No. That’s not what this is about. I understand.” My chest ached not wanting to hurt my mother’s feelings.
She just nodded quietly in a trance, looking at the envelope. I wondered what memories of my dad flooded back to her as she stared.
Drumming my hands on the manila envelope with my name written on it in bold black letters, I said, “I didn’t want to open it without talking to you first. I don’t want to hurt you or make you think that you weren’t enough for me, because you were.” Now my own tears choked me up.
Mom wiped the tears off my cheeks with both her thumbs looking into my eyes. “You have the right to know.” Her eyes were full of sadness and regret. “Once your father left during my third month of pregnancy, I never heard from him again, but, I didn’t look.” She paused looking away into the past. “I never looked back because I had you, a baby on the way, and I had to get strong for that.”
My arms wrapped around my mother’s shoulders. “You are strong. The strongest woman I know.”
“If you want to know about your father, even meet him, I’m okay with that.” My mom squeezed me tightly. “You’re the best thing that ever happened to me, Mia. I love you.”
The yearning to know my father dissipated as I held onto my mother. Whoever my dad was, he didn't have the same love for me that my mother did or else he would have come for me. He wouldn't have let all the years pass without ever once trying to contact me or get to know me.
As I took the envelope in my hands, my mother looked at me with understanding eyes. The shredder was in the adjoining room. I headed straight for it. I had made my decision. Mom was enough for me. “I don't need to know, Mom. He has had plenty of time to find me, and he hasn't.”
My mom followed close behind me. “Are you sure? You don't have to do that.”
I turned on the shredder without any doubt in my mind. “I want to.” Watching the envelope going through the slot and turn into shreds of paper, I felt renewed, proud of myself, even.
I put my arm around my mother. “All I need is you, Mom.”
We smiled at each other and walked back to the kitchen. It felt good to get that out of the way and off my chest.
The latest issue of Vogue was on the kitchen counter. Mom wiped the last of my tears with the back of her hand, kissing me on the forehead. Then she nodded at my breakfast, “Eat,” she said and began flipping through the issue. She stopped on a Marc Janow ad of me – the one where I was standing in front of Theo's painting.
She held it up to me as I ate my eggs. “You look so beautiful!”
Tucking my hair behind my ear, I smiled, “Thanks. I get it from my mom.”
My mother walked over to me with concern on her face and took my hand in hers. “I noticed you haven't been wearing your engagement ring. Is it getting resized? Or...”
It was time to tell the truth about everything. My mom listened while I talked. When I was done, she asked, “Could this Penny girl be lying?”
“The Board minutes confirmed it. Theo only proposed to me in order to improve his image for the company.” The minutes had solidified everything for me. Penny hadn't been lying.
“I'm sorry, Mia,” Mom said, brushing hair out of my eyes with her hand.
“I was so stupid to fall for a playboy. Penny has known Theo for years, but I've only known him for a few months. I should have known there was something more to their relationship.”
My mom shook her head sympathetically. “You couldn't have! You trusted him. That doesn't make you stupid.”
I felt stupid. Theo had never cared about me, only his company. When I uncovered those orgy photos, that should have been a sign to me that Theo Wainwright was a womanizing asshole.
But, no. I fell for it. I walked right into his trap. To think, I almost married him. To think, I could have been in a sham of a marriage. Even though Penny wasn't my favorite person in the world, I had her to thank from saving me from years and years of grief.
Chapter 23
Theo
I spent a few days relentlessly returning to Mia’s dorm and begging Jill on hands and knees to tell me where Mia was. I didn’t blame Jill for wanting me far away from Mia, but after I explained myself, she told me Mia was in Carpinteria at her mom’s.
I jumped on the next available flight in the morning to get down there as quickly as possible. It had already been a week since the incident. Who knew what was going through Mia’s head?
The more time that passed the harder it would be to get Mia back. There was no way I was going to come back to the Bay Area without her. My life would forever be incomplete without Mia by my side.
The night before my sleep had been fitful. My blackout curtains, the three oscillating fans, and even a Benadryl couldn’t give me a decent night sleep. All I could think about was Mia. Worse case scenarios kept playing in my mind.
What if she refused to take me back? What if she had already fallen out of love with me?
She’d left a tank top that she wore to sleep. Hugging it close to my chest and breathing in her floral scent, my heart thudded like a heavy brick.
What would I do without her in my life?
I’d finally discovered what love was and how splendid it felt to love and be loved. It was all gone because of Penny and her psychotic rage. My hope was that once I saw Mia face to face I’d be able to explain everything.
The negative thought that she would refuse to talk to me lingered in my throat nearly bringing tears to my eyes. I missed her so much, but I fought back the urge to wail. My mission was to fight for her. I’d plant myself outside her mother’s house until I was dragged away or vultures swooped down to eat my pitiful carcass.
The next morning, the flight down to Carpinteria was just as agonizing as the night before, if not more, since my eyes were heavy with fatigue and my nerves were shot. I felt like a walking zombie. All I could think about was seeing Mia’s beautiful face again.
Once in her hometown, I rented a car and headed straight to her mom’s. Carpinteria was charming in a small town way without being too folksy or outdated. As I drove through the main part of town, I imagined the biggest vat of guacamole set up there. Mia had told me in animated detail about the Avocado Festival. I was actually looking forward to going to the festival and taking part in one of Mia’s traditions.
I pulled up to Mia’s mom’s house, my nerves tingling with anxiety. The blue cottage style house was cute with flower boxes in the windows and a matching blue mailbox that had colorful painted birds all over it. It looked like the kind of home Mia would have grown up in: fun, charming, and provincial.
As I released a breath, I knocked on the door. Mia’s mother answered. “Can I help you?” she asked with a worried brow. The resemblance between Mia and her mother was uncanny. They had the same eyes and cheekbones.
“Yes, Ms. Smith, I’m here to see your daughter, Mia,” I begged desperately.
Her face grimaced in recognition. “You’re Theo?” she inquired.
“Yes, ma’am. I’m Theo.�
� My voice was conciliatory and on the brink of cracking.
Mia’s mom shook her head dismissively. “I’m sorry. She doesn’t want to see you.”
As she tried to slam the door in my face, I put my hand up blocking her. Ms. Smith pulled the door open and accused, “Excuse me? Are you challenging me, son?”
I pleaded with her, “No, I’m not. I just want to talk to your daughter please. Just a few minutes.”
Mia’s mom’s eyes narrow into thin infuriated slits. I’d really pissed her off by trying to hold the door open, but it needed to be done. How else was I going to see Mia?
“Mom, what’s going on out here?” Mia said as she walked up behind her mother.
Seeing her face, my anxiety was briefly lifted. I loved her so much. Just seeing her again helped my heartache even if she was not happy to see me.
“What are you doing here, Theo?” she snapped. Putting a calming hand on her mother’s shoulders, she assured her, “I’m going to get rid of him, Mom. Go back inside.”
Mia’s mom walked away, shooting daggers at me.
I stuttered. “I…I…needed to see you.”
Mia crossed her arms with hate in her eyes. “We have nothing to say to each other.
Holding my hands up in surrender, I said, “Please let me explain.”
