“How do I prepare the bottle, sir, for the baby?”
“Call her Hope or Little Bit, not the baby.”
“Yes, sir, now how do I prepare her food?”
Ben came in the living room. “She’s starting to stir, but that’s all. She’s not awake yet.”
“I’ll be right back and show you how.”
Matthew took Hope and went into the master bedroom where Julia lay.
“Julia, wake up, honey. I’ve a baby girl who needs you.” He sat on the side of the bed and held the crying baby, hoping she would get through to the woman lying there.
“Matthew.” The faint voice came from Julia, but she didn’t open her eyes. “Matthew, the baby needs me.”
“Yes, she does, but she’ll be fine until you get better. Are you thirsty?”
“Yes,” she croaked.
He laid a crying Hope on the bed and filled a glass from the water pitcher on the bureau.
“Here you go.” He slid a hand behind her neck and lifted to help her to drink. “Slowly, I don’t want you to have too much.”
“I know.” She opened her eyes. “Don’t want me throwing up all over you. Have you given me any laudanum yet? And if not, why not?” She glared at him. “I hurt like the devil. But please take care of Hope first. She sounds so tired and probably hungry. I’ll be fine until you are through with her.”
“All right, let me get my bag.”
He took Hope to her father. Blaine had brought her things into the living room.
“She needs changing and cleaning. You’ll find everything you need in that valise. I have to see to Julia now.”
Matthew watched Blaine put Hope down on the sofa. Ben came over and was giving him instructions. They would be fine.
“Is she eating now? I don’t hear her.” Julia spoke as Matthew entered the room.
“She will be soon,” he chuckled. “Her daddy has her and is changing her first. Ben is supervising. I think she’s teaching him what to do. How is my girl feeling?”
“Am I your girl?
“Yes, you’re my girl and so is Hope. I’ll give you some laudanum now. As you know, it will help with the pain and let you sleep.” He handed her a small glass of water with several drops of the drug added.
“Good, I’m ready to sleep now that I’m sure Hope is being taken care of.” She drank the liquid down without stopping.
“And she is. I wouldn’t let her suffer. You know me better than that.”
“I know. You’re a good…dad…” She was asleep, the medicine doing its job.
Matthew’s heart ached at her words. He bent down and kissed Julia on the lips. “I won’t let anything happen to you, either.”
* * *
Blaine stayed and took care of Hope while Matthew cared for Julia. When Matthew had to go on a house call, he asked Ben to stay with Julia. She was in and out of consciousness and the wound wasn’t healing properly. Infection showed up on the third day, the wound becoming swollen and red. Matthew gave Julia extra laudanum, and then opened the bullet hole back up and cleaned it out. He poured whiskey over it again and re-sewed the wound leaving two stitches out so it could drain.
Julia developed a fever that same night.
He broke up ice into a basin of water and wiped down her face, chest, arms and legs with the chilled liquid.
He’d been up for two days and needed sleep. When Ben came by, Matthew could hardly keep from laying his head next to Julia and sleeping a while.
Ben took one look at him and shook his head. “You’re exhausted, Matthew. Let me take over for a time while you sleep. I care about her, too, you know.”
“I know. I thought you and she were having an affair, but she set me straight, as did you.” He realized he was babbling and nodded toward Julia. “I could use the break. If anything happens, you come get me right away.”
“I will. Now go.”
Ben took over, working to cool Julia as much as possible. The ice water seemed to be working and, while Matthew slept, her fever broke.
“Water…please.” She had barely any voice.
“Sure thing, sweetheart. Here you go.” Ben held her head while she sipped the cool liquid. “I have to get Matthew. He wanted to know if anything changed. I’d say you waking up is a definite change.”
He left the room and returned in a few minutes with Matthew.
“How are you feeling? I’ll take a look at your wound.” Matthew removed the bandage. “Good. The drainage is only a big of seeping blood. No infection.”
“Did I get a fever? I feel drained.”
“You did.” Matthew chuckled. “Only a nurse would think like that.”
The next morning, Julia was even better. “Drink some more of that broth. It’ll help you regain your strength. When you get to feeling better we need to talk about Blaine Carstairs. I’ve never been so scared in my life as I was when we found you that night.”
“Matthew, this was an accident. No one is at fault. The gun just went off. I’m just glad it didn’t hit Hope. I want to talk to him.”
“Okay, but I don’t think you’re ready yet.”
“Just get me a clean nightgown. I assume you’ve had Ben bring my things down here.”
“I did. Can you read my mind?” How does she know me so well?
“An educated guess.” She laughed. “Oww. Don’t make me laugh.”
“All right. I’ll get Blaine.”
A few minutes later, Blaine walked in.
Matthew stayed with Hope and let Julia talk to him alone.
“Mrs. Reynolds, I am so very sorry.”
“First call me Julia. Second, I know you didn’t mean to shoot me. I wasn’t afraid of that little derringer, but I guess I should have been.”
“I was so angry but I’m not anymore and I’m so sorry I acted in such a crazy way.”
“I assume you’ve been caring for her, since the doctor has been taking care of me. How do you like it?”
“I, uh, I love my daughter, but I’m not cut out to care for her like this every day. These past few days have shown me how difficult that task is.”
“Working your claim would give you very little time to spend with her. But I doubt I can convince you not to work it when you’re finding silver.”
“You’re right, that’s not very likely.”
“Have you thought anymore about my idea of taking a job in town so you can care for Hope?”
“Well, I…would but I have to strike while the iron is hot. If I don’t work this claim I could lose it and someone else will become wealthy. We all have our dreams, but mine came true.” He squared his shoulders. “My claim is worth a lot of money. Maybe not as much as Ben King, but still a lot. Enough for me to hire a wet nurse to take care of Hope.”
“That’s wonderful, Blaine.”
“I know that you and the doc aren’t really married yet, everybody does. I am very attracted to you, Julia. If you married me, you would have Hope and you’d have lots more children, too. You’re a good mother.”
“I’m flattered Blaine, but this is absurd. You were my kidnapper and now your proposing marriage when legally, I’m still married to Doctor Reynolds.”
Blaine ran his hands through his hair, making it stand on end all over his head. “Well, think about it.”
He looked like a wild man.
“I will, but I don’t think it will be the answer you want.”
“You’re just tired Julia. Get some sleep.”
“Very well. Thank you, Blaine.”
CHAPTER 13
For ten days, Julia recuperated at Matthew’s house but now the time had come to leave. He still hadn’t given her an answer.
Blaine Carstairs had disappeared in the middle of the night but left a letter saying he would be back in a few days and would she please care for Hope while he was gone?
She had to think about what was best for her and Hope.
She packed one valise with her clothes and one with Hope’s things.
; Matthew came into her bedroom and shut the door behind him.
“Matthew?”
He advanced and took her by the shoulders. “You’re staying here. You’re never going to put me through that again. First you were kidnapped and then to find you shot and bleeding…” He hugged her close.
“Matthew.” She wrapped her arms around his neck. “I’m fine. Hope is fine. Blaine was just desperate.”
“The incident would never have happened if you lived with me.”
She pulled out of his arms. “You know my conditions for moving back to your house. Those haven’t changed. I need to know Hope and I have a permanent home and that means that we consummate our marriage. Your self-imposed deadline has come and gone and you haven’t given me a decision. Does what happened make arriving at an answer any easier for you?”
“No. If anything it makes it harder. Now I don’t know if I want you to stay because I want you or just want to protect you.”
“You want me.” She walked her fingers up his chest and felt his erection against her belly.
He clasped his hands behind her waist and pulled her closer. “There is that.” He lowered his head and took her lips, searing her, branding her.
She returned his kiss, adding all her love. There was no holding back not any longer. She’d almost lost everything. What if Matthew hadn’t come after her? But he had. He cared. Whether he knew it or not, he loved her.
Julia pulled back. “Yes,” she whispered before she met his lips again.
He dragged his lips from hers.
She made a little mewling sound.
His voice was gravelly, raw as though pulled from him at great cost.
“Yes? Don’t tease me.”
“I’m not teasing. Now kiss me before I change my mind.” She wrapped her arms tightly against his neck, her fingers tangling in his hair.
His lips mashed against hers, his tongue pressed into her mouth. They melted, one into the other.
When they broke apart, he rested his forehead against hers while they caught their breath.
“I’ve missed you.”
The words sounded as though dragged from deep within him. She loved hearing this sentiment.
“I’ve missed you, too.” She feathered her lips against his. “I want you, Matthew. I’ve never had these kinds of feelings before.”
“I’m gratified to hear that. Give me a couple more days. I need to be sure…of myself.”
“All right. And I expect you to take all of them before you come back to the reality, that you miss me and want me to be with you. Always.”
He smiled. “You’re pretty sure of yourself.”
She slowly blinked her eyes and shook her head. “No. I’m sure of you.”
He lowered his gaze. “I wish I had your faith.”
She stroked her fingers along his jaw. “You do. You have to look inside and see what you really feel. Don’t worry about how it happened. Just feel what it is. You’ve fallen in love with me, but you simply don’t want to admit the truth.”
“I don’t know if what I feel is love. I thought I loved Amelia and I never felt about her, like I do you. I don’t know if at this late date in my life I can feel love.”
“I’m glad you have more feelings for me than you did for her. But what does age have to do with feeling love? You make it sound like you’re Walter’s age and even at that, I’d bet he doesn’t rule out finding love again.”
“I just don’t think it’s possible. Not for me.”
She leaned back in his arms so she could meet his gaze. “So you want me to stay here, maybe have a valid marriage all without the prospect of love?”
“When you say it like that, the arrangement sounds bad.”
“It is bad…for me. You have all the benefits and none of the consequences.” Realization hit hard and she pulled away. “No. I won’t compromise. I’ve had enough. I’m filing for an annulment. As much as I don’t want to, I can’t take this anymore.”
“Julia, I—”
Something inside her snapped. “You’ve had more than enough time. You don’t get another day. I’ll send someone for the bags.” Fighting back tears, she picked up Hope and walked from the room.
“I’ll take your valises to the hotel.” He snatched them off the floor and followed her out.
They marched the few blocks to the Tombstone Hotel without speaking.
Head held high, Julia walked to the front desk. “Hello, Robert. I’d like the key to my suite please.”
“Certainly, Miss O’Brien. Mr. King gave instructions that you are to have it whenever you returned.”
Julia turned to Matthew, bracing herself for what came next. “See even Ben knew you wouldn’t make the right decision. Go home Matthew. Go back to your lonely little world and let me find some happiness in my life. If it can’t be with you, maybe it can be with Hope’s father or with Ben King. Both of them have asked me to marry them.”
“You’re married to me. What are they doing proposing to you? Have you given them any reason to think you would be interested?”
“You lost the right to ask that question when you didn’t meet your own deadline and I have enough pride not to beg you again. But, no, I haven’t given them a reason to think anything. And that’s the point. We’re not truly married, and the whole city knows it. We’re laughing stocks. I’m talking to Judge Blackstone tomorrow.”
“Do what you want. I can’t stop you.” He turned and walked away.
“You still don’t get it.” Julia said to his retreating form. “You could stop me, if you wanted to.”
Although her eyes burned, she refused to let the tears fall in front of the desk clerk. “Robert, would you help me with my bags, please?”
“Certainly, I’ll follow you.”
“Thank you.”
She walked to her suite and opened the door. On the table in front of the settee, was a vase of wild flowers. “From Mr. King?”
“Yes. He has them replaced every day so they’d be fresh when you got here.”
“That’s right. I didn’t know when you’d be back, though I was sure you would be.”
Ben leaned in the doorway, arms crossed on his chest.
“Oh, Ben.” Julia walked to him.
He enveloped her and Hope in his arms.
“I’d feel a lot better if you’d let me beat some sense into him,” he whispered against her hair.
She sniffled and pulled back. “I don’t think your attempt would do any good. Now he says he doesn’t think he can ever love me. That at his age, he can’t feel love. How idiotic is that? I know he loves me, but he won’t admit it.”
“He’s scared, honey.”
“Exactly. What’s so bad about being in love with me? Am I so unlovable?”
“You’re asking the wrong person. You know I love you and would marry you in a second.”
“Ben, I love you too, but as a friend. My best friend.”
“I understand and that’s okay. Just know I’ll always be here for you.”
“I do. Thank you.”
Hope decided to make herself known and started to cry.
“Oops, I think someone needs a nap. The cradle is still at Matthew’s. Do you think you could get it sometime today? For now a drawer will do.”
She went into the bedroom.
Ben followed with her valises.
“Let me get that drawer for you.” He put down the bags and pulled out the top drawer of the bureau. “Here we go.”
“Thanks.”
She took a pillow and made Hope’s bed.
“You know she’s growing fast. She’s won’t be able to use the drawer for very much longer.” She lay the sniffling infant in the makeshift bed. “Even the cradle will be too small. I should just buy a crib.”
“I’ll order one for her today.”
“You don’t have to do that. You’ve already been so good to us.” Julia crooned a quiet lullaby to Hope.
The baby sucked her fist before turning he
r head and falling asleep.
Julia put her fingers on her lips. “Shh.” She walked out to the living room.
Ben followed. “Do you think he’s coming back?”
“Who? Hope’s father? Oh, yes. I believe he loves his daughter and he’ll definitely be back. He’s asked me to marry him and be Hope’s mother permanently.” She sat on the sofa and motioned for Ben to join her.
Ben’s eyes widened. “You’re not seriously considering his proposal are you? He doesn’t love you. At least if you married me, you know I love you.”
She shook her head. “As much as I love Hope, that love is not a good enough reason to marry her father. No, I won’t be marrying Blaine. If I was settling for a loveless marriage, I’d stay with Matthew. As for you, I want you to find love and marry that woman. I don’t know who she is or will be but don’t you dare settle and don’t let her get away. You’re too good a man to accept less than a great love. She’s out there. I know it.”
“Thanks. That’s kind of you to say.” He leaned back on the sofa. “So what are you going to do? You know you’re welcome to stay here as long as you like.”
“Thank you, but I need to make a living. I’m a nurse and a midwife and darn good at both. I’d hoped to open my own practice alongside Matthew’s. My business would be serving women and babies. But if I open it without Matthew, I probably won’t have any patients because they want to know the doctor is behind me. I need to have a doctor’s support.”
“What about another doctor? Say Tom Jefferies.”
She shook her head. “My chances are better if I move to a small town.”
“Maybe Benson? The town is not too far away and it’s smaller than Tombstone, but there’s a rail station so there will be lots of people coming and going. They have one doctor for the folks who live there as well as the ones just passing through. His name is John Bishop. I’ll give you his address.”
“Thank you. That information sounds very interesting. If he could take me on, that would be perfect. How do you know the doctor there?”
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