by Jon Chaisson
Despite the uncertainty, they too chose to accept it.
She sat cross-legged on the concrete floor with the others in this small circle, having an informal chat session. Caren sat to her immediate right, always by her side now, with Amna to her left. They were the consorts of the One of All Sacred, though she would rarely think of them in that way. They were sister and best friend, and in her heart they always would be. Anando sat to Caren's right, her sister’s cho-shadhisi and spiritual anchor. He had taken over the day-to-day running of warehouse living while Nehalé Usarai was away.
To Amna's left was Mancka Udéma, the former Mendaihu representative of the Provincial Governor's Council. Her days lately had consisted of community service at the warehouse and the drudgery of meetings with Councillor James out on Sachers Island, and little else. She was the reflection of everyone else down on the main warehouse floor, her natural empath abilities magnifying and refining it, making it all the more readable and understandable for those here in this circle.
Poe had been in the area earlier, very close by, but had chosen not to enter the warehouse, for reasons she didn't quite understand. He'd appeared on her radar a few hours ago, and had been on his way here, only to stop one block away with a sensation of dark thoughts surrounding him. He had been training with an Elder Mendaihu, but where had he been over the last day and a half? He was already heading elsewhere now. He hadn’t traveled by any normal means either. He'd moved within the Light...all on his own! She was so proud of him when she sensed him Lightwalking away from the area, immediately afterwards she felt an unexpected dread...as if he was no longer the man and the protector she had always known. Something had changed within him, something dangerous.
Akaina, who sat to Mancka's left, had sensed the same thing, and her reaction had been a mixture of concern and dread. She and her brother Ashan had come to the warehouse soon after he’d appeared, hoping to catch him as soon as he came back from his training, and they must have sensed his presence as well. Kai was distraught, having missed him deeply. Recent events had kept them apart for far too long.
“Word is that something could happen as soon as tomorrow,” Anando said. “I've heard from reality seers and spiritsensers, the Shenaihu have grown weary of this standoff and they want to act. But they haven't made their intentions clear. We should remain vigilant. Our people here in the warehouse are itching to take their places around the city, and will do so only when I give them the go-ahead.”
Denni bowed deeply. “Noted and appreciated, Anando. What do we have from the Shenaihu? Anything at all?”
Ashan moved slightly forward and bowed. “Akaina and I have been sensing around the city. We find nothing out of the ordinary. Aside from the congregation down in South City, there has been no action in any of the other sectors. Minor pockets of recently awakened Shenaihu are moving around, but they have not shown any aggression. They have not yet chosen their path.”
“However...” Kai added, “Upon a cursory investigation of the South City area, the Shenaihu are creating a collective similar to the one here at the warehouse. We have contacts down there, all cho-nyhndah, and are reporting directly to Ashan and myself.”
Denni nodded. “Any spiritual movement?” she asked.
“Nothing out of the ordinary,” she continued. “We encountered no major rituals, no spikes in energy levels.”
She bit her lip, thinking about that. “Let me know as soon as they report back. I want everything from concrete evidence to just plain gut feelings.”
“Yes, Dearest,” Kai said.
The honorific made her twitch. She didn’t want the subservience of her closest friends. It was expected now; she was the One of All Sacred, and within this circle, she was their leader and it was the highest Meraladian honor to address the One as the supreme leader on Gharra. When she was fulfilling her duties as the One, she approached the role naturally, embracing it and using it to full effect. So when they called her Dearest, she felt the love in their spirits as they spoke to her. They were willing participants because of their faith in her. This, without the aid of the eight previous Dearest.
Still, a part of it always rubbed her the wrong way. She was no more a human being than anyone else here.
“Thank you, Kai,” she said. “Have you heard from Alec in the last hour? I believe he's heading back towards Branden Hill.”
“He is heading in that direction,” she said. “I'm sensing he's not in the best of moods right now. He might be heading to his apartment, but I believe his true destination is ARU Headquarters.”
“He wants to confront Farraway,” Caren said impatiently, momentarily forgetting where she was. “Damn fool is reacting to his anger again. Elder Nayélha must have done a number on him.”
Denni let her sister's inappropriate words go for the moment. “Is it imperative that he be here at this point in time?” she asked as an open question.
“He's to sit at the left hand of the One,” Anando said. “Between Mancka and Amna. He's the Warrior of the One. He should be here, but no, it is not imperative right now. We are strong, and the circle holds. He must arrive before morning, however, if he is to be here in time.”
“How about edha Slater and emha Kennedy?” she said. “I'm sensing their presence in that area as well. They're at the ARU already.”
Caren nodded, bowing in deference this time. “When they stopped here earlier, Sheila hinted that they were going to confront Farraway as well. Would you like me to contact them?”
Denni thought, then shook her head. “No, I think it's all right. They'll return on their own. Their fates have been chosen and their duties are ready to be fulfilled. I would, however, like to speak to them before tomorrow morning. I will find them myself, but I shall take Amna in case security is needed. They shall take the seats exactly opposite me, between Anando and Akaina, as Observer and Messenger. Until then, we should rest. Later tonight we can take care of any last minute preparations, and we shall embrace whatever the Shenaihu have planned for us.
“Until then, Peace, Love and Light to all of you. You're all in my mind and in my heart.”
“And to you, Dearest One,” they said in unison. “And you in ours.”
Five bays in and four tiers up, Denni reclined against the pile of pillows stacked in the corner of her sister's makeshift living space. Her dry eyes burned and her calves hurt from being on her feet all day. It was only about five in the afternoon, just past the sinking of the sun, and she was exhausted. This was not the shape to be in right now! She stretched out her legs and yawned, hoping she could at least relax her nerves for the time being. If it wasn’t for the fact that she had a billion other things to do before tomorrow morning, she’d have passed out already.
Hey, she heard from within. A second later, Caren's head popped up at the opposite corner, near the ladder. “Care for some company?”
“Sure,” Denni said, and slid over to make room. Caren climbed in and lay next to her, snuggling up. Despite their wildly differing fates and roles as Mendaihu, Caren was still her older sister and still fiercely protective of her. Whatever happened in the future, Denni would always hold onto that. She nestled into Caren's embrace, closed her eyes, and let out a satisfied sigh.
“The warehouse is in good hands,” she said, stifling another yawn. “It's become self-sustaining. It's a successful community now.”
Caren hummed in agreement. “Thanks to you,” she said.
“Thanks to Anando,” she hummed. “He's done more than his share. He's sacrificed a lot...even spending time with you.”
She felt Caren's disappointment, masked by acceptance. “He's been honest about that, Den, I'll give him that. As much as he wants to be with me, his priorities keep him here longer than he would like.”
Denni opened her eyes and turned to her. “You're not angry?”
Caren laughed quietly. “Sure, I'm a little annoyed. But I think our situation is a little more important. I miss him, and he misses me.”
“You should be with him,” Denni said.
“I'll see him later,” she said.
“You should be with him right now,” she continued.
Caren laughed. “Fesh piann, hon.” she teased. “I'm the big sister here. I tell you what to do.”
Denni forced a smile. “Fair enough. But you should see him tonight. I'll be back in my little cubicle to give you two some privacy.” She felt Caren blushing, the radiant energy suddenly pushing away from her face. She giggled and turned to face her. Sure enough, her face was crimson. “You know what I mean,” she added.
“Yeah...” Caren said, nudging her. “I know what you mean, brat.”
“Good.” She turned back onto her side, closed her eyes, and smiled. “You two belong together. You’re like perfect anchors for each other.”
Another trickle of energy, this time of joy. “Thanks, Den. I needed to hear that.”
“It's true,” she said. “You were together before, and you're here now. Your purpose here is to protect me, but it's also to find Anando and rekindle the physical and spiritual love you've always had for each other. Listen to your heart, Karinna. Listen to your spirit, listen to what it sings. Whatever it sings to you is the truth. Does your spirit love Anando Shalei?”
“I...” Caren frowned deeply. She knew the answer already, she just needed the strength to accept it. “Yes,” she said finally. “Yes, I do love him, and I know I always have.”
“Does he know this?” she asked.
“Yes,” Caren said, bowing her head. She was afraid to look her own sister in the eye.
“That's nothing to be ashamed of,” Denni said, reaching out and touching her on the arm. “It's spiritual love. It's pure.”
“I know,” she mumbled. “It's just...”
“What?”
She shrugged heavily as she finally lifting her head. “It's just that it seems so...innocent. It’s stupid, I know. I keep expecting more out of it.”
Denni smirked at her. “Don't expect anything out of love, Karzi. It's something that evolves over time. All you really need to do is nurture it, keep it alive.”
Caren shook her head in amusement. “Fine, you win. I'll see if I can hunt the man down. I give you a half hour before I kick you out of this little hellhole, got it?”
Denni giggled. “I'm gone already,” she said, pushing herself up. “I'll be in my usual spot if you need me.”
“Like you don't infringe on my life already, little shit,” she said. “Thanks.” She reached over and gave her a tight hug. Love you, hon.
“Love you too,” she smiled, and swung out over the side to climb down the ladder.
She stopped at its base, looking back up. She still felt her sister's presence up there, brimming with an excitement she had never witnessed before. It had been too long a time since Caren had any kind of happiness in her life. She had become her legal guardian after their parents died, and her role had become so similar to theirs that she’d begun to live almost exactly the same — faithful to the ARU, a respected cho-nyhndah dedicated to protect her fellow Terran, and ready to give her life to protect her sister. Caren followed this road and did it willingly.
She turned and began walking down the quiet corridor of racks and thought about this. She wanted Caren to live her own life as well, apart from being the Protector, apart from being the big sister. Did Caren even know who she was, deep within? Did she know much beyond the name Karinna Shalei, aside from her cho-nyhndah strength? Did she even know her own spiritual ancestry?
“Hey, Den,” she heard from her left. It was a small boy, about nine, sitting cross-legged near the back of his cubicle on the first level. She'd met the kid only once, but knew him to be a strong cho-nyhndah. He'd been hunched over, poking away at a game on his hardback vidmat, and had paused it to work out his stiff neck.
“Hi, Bobby,” she said, offering a smile. “Where are your brothers?”
The kid gave her an impish grin. “Jase is upstairs,” he said, pointing upwards. “I don’t know where Kevin is.”
“You behaving?” she asked, sitting down on the edge of the kid's cubicle.
“Of course!” he said, and even gave her a comical wink. He set down his vidmat and scooted up beside her, immediately friendly.
She laughed and patted him on the back. Her amusement was short-lived however, as reality sunk in. Nine years old! Goddess, this kid was way too young to be here at this time. “Bobby, can I ask you a question?” she said quietly. “You don't have to answer if you don't want to.”
The boy frowned a little. “That's okay,” he said. “I don't mind.”
“And don't answer because who I am, okay? Answer as if I was a friend.”
He nodded quietly.
“Bobby...what do you think about the upcoming Season?”
“Season?” he repeated.
Denni hid that pang of guilt as much as she could, knowing that a good portion of the city could most likely sense it. “There may be...something happening,” she said. “There might be a fight.”
The boy's worry gave way to recognition. “Oh, Season of Embodiment, you mean,” he said in a manner that suggested he was looking forward to it. “Yeah, I know about it. I've been hearing stuff around the warehouse.”
She shuddered. “What are your feelings about it?”
Bobby hunched his shoulders. “I know it's pretty serious. Some people are going to get hurt. Some might not come back to the warehouse when it's done.”
Goddess... Denni thought, the heartache welling within her. He's only nine...
“You understand this?” she asked, keeping her voice from breaking.
“Sure,” he said, staring at her with his deep blue eyes. “My brother Kevin told me all about it. Gave me nightmares at first, but not anymore. I get it now. Like I know what's going to happen to me, you know?”
Only nine!
“I know...” She hesitated before asking the next question, not wanting to push the boy too far. “Are you a reality seer?”
He nodded, beaming with pride. “Yeah!” he said. “I knew you were walking down this way, so I climbed down to wait until you came. You wanted to talk, but didn't know who to talk to. Like you needed someone you didn't know.”
She shivered at his prescience. “I did...I do. I guess I just needed to know everyone's all right tonight.”
“We’re in good hands. You should get some sleep,” Bobby said.
This made her laugh. “I probably should,” she said.
“We're fine,” he said. “Me, Jase, Kev, and everyone else here. We're okay. Jase is actually more worried about you, you know. Says you're going to burn out if you keep your energy levels this high for so long.”
Denni stared at him. Nine years old, she reminded herself, yet she knew it, even before it registered in her head. She felt it in her spirit, when she sensed him: Bobby's was an extremely old soul. One that could probably be traced back to Trisanda if she tried.
What's your name? she said to him from within.
Cantara Oktanis, Bobby replied.
“Oktanis...” she whispered aloud. D'kami's clan! She wondered if he knew who this D'kami was, but she didn't have the nerve to ask. He must have understood, because he shrugged silently.
“My dad was part of the ARU unit your parents were in,” he said.
Another pang of guilt...this time draped in sorrow. “Is he retired, then?”
“Retired,” he said. “He's proud that Jase and Kev and I are here. He says he's too old, so he stayed back at the house. We live across the river, about a mile from the tunnel out of Swope Heights.
“He wants you to be here, in the thick of it?”
Bobby bowed his head and forced himself not to smile. “Never mind what my pop says. I want to be here, Dearest One,” he said. “Never mind my youth. I know what I'm doing.”
Despite his use of the formality, she found herself comforted by that. “Good,” she said, and reached out a hand to touch his arm. He wavered for a moment
, completely surprised that she would touch him, just one of the thousands of Followers of the One. He beamed at her.
“Thanks,” she said to him, and leaned over to kiss him on the forehead. “May your strength never waver, Cantara Oktanis. Peace, Love and Light to you and your family.”
His face turned a deep shade of crimson but he didn't let on that he knew. Instead, he bowed deeper and clasped his hand over hers. “And to you, Dearest One,” he said. “Peace, Love and Light to you.” He lifted his chin ever so slowly, and already he was stifling a giggle. “I'm sorry, Denni...just not used to someone close to my age being the One of All Sacred.”
Oh, there's more to it than that, she thought, smirking at him. “Don't sweat it, Bobby,” she laughed. “You've certainly helped clear my mind.”
“My intentions all along,” he said. “Go, get some rest.”
“I will,” she said, smiling and shaking her head. She climbed out of the cubicle and brushed herself off. She ducked her head down and looked at him, feeling responsible for him but trusting his words of survival as well. “Tomorrow, then, Bobby. I hope I'll see you when it's all over.”
“You will,” he nodded.
“I'm sure I will,” she said. “Good night.”
“G'night, Denni,” he said, picking up his vidmat game.
“Nine years old,” she said aloud, lying in her own cubicle. Denni had chosen one next door to Amna, three aisles away from Caren, eight bays in and three up. She was surrounded on all sides by Protectors — that is, all except the one across the way, which still remained empty. That was to be Poe's spot, if he ever decided to come back. She looked out at his cubicle, watching its emptiness, sensing his absence. He was out there, somewhere in town, still searching for a truth that may or may not exist. He was trying to envision a life without the Mendaihu, a life without the Shenaihu...a life without this conflict. He, of all people, had the most intense passion to see it end once and for all, to see Gharra as the beautiful, serene planet that it was.
