“Amen,” Miriam echoed. She’d planned to pray aloud also, but the words had flown away. Aunt Fannie seemed to understand as they rose to their feet. She glanced at her aunt. “Do you really think something else is bothering Uncle William? More than what happened before you were married?”
“I know there is,” Aunt Fannie replied without hesitation.
Her aunt was mighty confident, Miriam thought. But the truth was that this behavior was completely out of character for Uncle William—at least from what she knew of him.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Shirley pulled Mindy to a stop at the hitching rack in the Berlin Shopping Plaza. She paused for a moment before she climbed down. Mamm had allowed her to drive into town for the shopping, but that wasn’t why she’d decided to appear so openly in public for the first time. Nor was the cause the hopeful words the plastic surgeon had spoken last week when she’d visited his office in Canton. Rather it was Glen Weaver’s kindness at the rumspringa gatherings that had lifted her spirits. Her courage had returned, even if she didn’t fully understand why.
With an inward groan, Shirley stepped to the ground and tied Mindy to the long steel bar. Several other buggies were already parked there, and one of the horses neighed in their direction. Mindy lifted her head briefly, ears forward, but didn’t respond.
“I wouldn’t talk to him either.” Shirley patted Mindy on the neck and glanced around the parking lot. She made a quick dash for the plaza doors with her head down. No one gave her a second glance. The memories of her times here with Jonas rushed through her mind. She could hear the roar of his convertible and feel the wind fly over her face and through her hair as they sped down the road. Jonas hadn’t been by to see her again, but she was to blame for that. She didn’t want attention given out of pity, so she’d asked him not to visit.
Shirley stiffened her shoulders and walked even faster. There was little that could be done about her face. The scars wouldn’t go away anytime soon, even with the surgeon’s assurances last week that he would do his best. The reconstructive surgery could be scheduled whenever she was ready…but she wasn’t ready.
Shirley grabbed a cart and made her way down the grocery aisles. She clutched her list in one hand and kept her head down. Glen’s kindness had helped, but she still knew life would never be the same. Yah, she admitted she still wanted to feel the love and excitement that filled her heart when she was around Jonas. Glen Weaver was kind and decent and manly, but he wasn’t Jonas. She was being unfair to even compare Glen to Jonas.
Shirley jumped when a woman’s voice said, “Gut morning, Shirley. It’s nice to see you out and about.”
Shirley whirled around to see Rachel Swartz’s smiling face in front of her. She said a quick, “Gut morning.” She didn’t know Rachel that well, so surely this conversation wouldn’t last too long.
Rachel continued. “We were so sorry to hear about your accident. I haven’t had a chance at the Sunday services to express my regrets to you, what with all the work the women have to put in to feed the men lunch.” Rachel gave a short laugh at her own joke. “So what a coincidence to meet you now. I hope things are going well with you.” Rachel peered at Shirley’s face. “I hope there’s more they can do to help you.”
Ugh. So it was that bad? Shirley thought. Yah, she knew it was, which was exactly the reason she’d kept herself out of sight whenever possible. Rachel could have found her after Sunday services if she’d been that interested. The woman probably had other things on her mind.
Shirley just nodded and waited. Rachel seemed to want to say something more.
Rachel looked away and tapped her shopping cart handle. “I hope there are no hard feelings between our two families. I know things haven’t been going that well between Esther and Miriam in Oklahoma. Well, actually between Wayne and Esther and Miriam. I thought I should say something because I’m so sorry for that situation. Esther told me she apologized to Miriam, so that was good.”
Shirley’s face showed her puzzlement. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
Rachel stared at her for a moment. “Surely Miriam would have told your mamm by now.”
“Told her what?”
Rachel gasped. “Oh my, I should have kept my big mouth shut. I was afraid there would be hard feelings. I told myself, doesn’t a daughter tell her mamm such things? I know my children do.” Rebuke crept across Rachel’s face. “Miriam shouldn’t keep such things from her mamm.”
Shirley returned her stare. “Maybe you should tell me this important news so I can tell Mamm.”
Rachel appeared doubtful. “Such a thing should be heard directly from the source. That’s what I always say.”
“Miriam’s not here, and I am. And you brought it up.”
“It’s just that…” Rachel hesitated. “Oh, well. Why not? I guess you’ll find out anyway. And the sooner such things are taken care of the better. At least that’s what I always tried to teach my girls.”
Shirley waited as Rachel caught her breath. “And Esther did go over to apologize to Miriam, so I’m not telling secrets that shouldn’t be told. Something happened between Esther and Wayne while Miriam was here visiting.”
“Go on,” Shirley encouraged when Rachel hesitated again.
Rachel seemed to make up her mind and continued. “Well, Esther apologized because she and Wayne got a little too close while Miriam was out visiting you after your accident. One thing led to another, and the two kissed. Nothing serious, of course. They were both overcome by the moment. It just sort of happened, what with their past relationship and all. Esther admits this was wrong.”
Shirley shook her head. “Esther is interested in Wayne?”
Rachel’s face lit up. “Oh, yes. To be honest, I think Esther had high hopes Wayne would return her attentions someday, even after we moved here. But that still doesn’t mean she isn’t sorry she kissed someone else’s boyfriend. That was out of the line, and Esther knows it.”
“Miriam and Wayne have plans to wed this fall.”
“I know.” Rachel frowned. “That’s what makes this so uncomfortable.”
“Okay.” Shirley held up her hand. “Thank you for telling me and expressing your regrets. I’ll be sure and tell Mamm everything you’ve told me.”
“You do that.” Rachel moved down the aisle. She cast a last mournful glance over her shoulder. “And maybe your mamm and Miriam should talk more or write more.” Rachel then disappeared around a corner.
Shirley took in a long breath. Now that had been weird. Did Mamm know anything about this and hadn’t told her? That was possible. If Miriam’s heart was broken by her boyfriend’s betrayal with Esther, that was serious. And how like Miriam not to tell them of her struggles. Shirley kept her feelings out in the open, but Miriam didn’t.
Shirley considered the problem. Perhaps she should do something about this herself. It wouldn’t hurt to think of other people’s problems instead of her own for a change. But what could she do? Miriam wasn’t here, so she couldn’t offer a sisterly hug or a comforting word. Knowing her sister, she could imagine that Miriam had forgiven Wayne by now. Still, kindness helped heal wounds. Look how much Glen’s attentions had helped her.
Shirley found the last item on the shopping list and paid at the register. She pushed the cart across the parking lot, and Mindy turned her head to watch her approach. While Shirley loaded the items into the back of the buggy, a car the color of Jonas’s convertible eased past the parked buggies. It sparked another painful memory. At least Jonas had never kissed another girl while he dated her. He might be doing so now, and the thought hurt terribly. But Jonas had a right to do whatever he wanted. She’d sent him away because their relationship had been a fantasy on her part from the start. Mamm and Daett had warned her, but she hadn’t listened. If she had, these scars wouldn’t be on her face now.
Shirley wiped away a tear and untied Mindy. She climbed into the buggy, lifted the reins, and clucked. Mindy took off at a moderate pace
when Shirley let out the reins. She held Mindy back until they were out of town, then Mindy shifted into a faster clip. They both were in a hurry to get home, Shirley decided. The thought of Miriam in trouble with her boyfriend was disturbing.
Shirley turned Mindy into their driveway and unhitched beside the barn. Lee would have come out to help her if he’d been around, but she’d seen the distant forms of her brothers and Daett at work in a field. Shirley led Mindy into the barn and put her into her stall. With her arms full of groceries, she entered the house.
Mamm called from the kitchen, “That was a quick shopping trip. No Jonas, I hope.”
Shirley took in a deep breath. Mamm had remembered, and she’d been worried. Jonas, though, was no longer a danger.
Mamm seemed to read her silence correctly. She came over to give Shirley a quick hug. “I’m sorry for your heartache, but you knew deep down that you and Jonas could never be a couple. Besides, isn’t there a nice, young Amish man paying you attention at the gatherings?”
“Glen Weaver,” Shirley admitted. “We’re just friends.” No way would she admit the scope of what Glen had done for her. Not to her family, at least. He was the reason she’d felt brave enough to venture out today. She changed the subject. “Is there something going on with Miriam and Wayne that I don’t know about?”
Mamm was puzzled. “Not that I know of. Why?”
Shirley shrugged. “Rachel Swartz spoke with me at the store. It sounds like Esther is trying to steal Wayne from Miriam. She even kissed him while Miriam was out here visiting me and planning her wedding.”
Mamm stopped in midstride. “And why was Rachel telling you this? If it’s even true, which sounds perfectly awful.”
“She said something about not wanting trouble between our families. Rachel thought we already knew.”
Mamm shook her head. “Thank the Lord that Miriam has the sense not to write such gossip home.”
“I might write Miriam a letter just to encourage her,” Shirley said.
Mamm hesitated for a moment. “I guess that would be nice, but I think Miriam can take care of herself.”
“I suppose she can,” Shirley agreed as Mamm left the room. She would still write. Shirley knew she would want a letter of sympathy from Miriam if Jonas had done such a thing.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Shirley settled into the seat of Glen’s buggy. She wasn’t sure how he had talked her into leaving the rumspringa gathering north of Berlin, but here she was headed with him for the Mount Hope Auction. She was going to a horse sale! Maybe it was just as well. What trouble could she get into on a buggy ride with Glen? She’d risked far worse with Jonas, so there was no reason she shouldn’t enjoy time with Glen.
“You sure about this?” Glen gave Shirley a quick sideways glance.
“Sure. Happy as can be.” Shirley smiled. “I like horses.”
“So do I, and I like to spend time with you too.”
“Thank you. And you’re pleasant enough yourself.”
Glen looked ready to say more, but he was distracted by traffic as they pulled up to a stop sign.
“What do you call your horse?” Shirley steered the conversation in a safer direction.
“Buster,” he said with a straight face.
Shirley laughed. “Come on, don’t tease me.”
He pretended a hurt look. “Why? Don’t you like Buster?”
“No one calls their horse Buster.”
“Okay, so what do you suggest?”
“I’m not going to name your horse when he already has one.”
Glen chuckled. “How about Duke?”
“That’s better, but you’re still teasing.”
“No, I’m not. That was his name when I purchased him at the Mount Hope Auction.”
“I like it.” Shirley leaned forward to study the horse’s back. “He trots like a duke.”
Glen laughed. “Now how would that be?”
“I don’t know. It’s just how I imagine a duke would move, I suppose.”
Their laughter filled the evening air and blended in with the horse’s steady hoofbeats on pavement.
After the comfortable silence that followed, Glen glanced at Shirley. “How’s your sister in Oklahoma getting on?”
“Okay, I guess. I meant to write her a letter this week, but I haven’t gotten around to it.”
Interest showed in Glen’s face. “I like letter writing, though I’ve never had much chance to practice. I’ve heard of dating couples who lived apart and filled their courtship with letters. Wouldn’t that be romantic?”
Shirley thought of Jonas and his kisses. She stared straight ahead. That had been romantic. “I think I’d rather spend time together than write letters. I’m not gut at such things.”
“You would be with practice.” Glen gave her a warm smile. “You have a talent for writing.”
Shirley laughed. “And you can divine that how?”
“Your hands.” Glen ran his fingers lightly over hers. “See? They’re just made for writing.”
“You’re such a tease.” Shirley moved her hand closer to Glen’s. She didn’t want to flirt with him, but she was in his buggy…and if he wanted to hold her hand…well, who was she to stifle romance?
Instead, Glen appeared lost in thought. “So, let’s see. I can imagine how this would go, so why don’t you compose your letter to Miriam while we drive. I’ll give you correction as needed.”
“Out loud?” Shirley asked, startled.
“Of course. You don’t have secrets, do you? I’m expecting you say only sisterly things.”
“Well…” Shirley’s mind whirled. “Maybe we do have secrets.”
Glen laughed. “You don’t tease well, you know.”
Shirley made a face at him. “I’m not teasing, and I don’t think it would be appropriate to share what I have to say, even if I could write it down right now.”
“Come on try,” he begged. “That’s why you never write. You put things off at the slightest excuse.”
Shirley gave him a quick glare. Maybe he needed a gut lesson. And surely he could handle the information.
“Please?” Glen begged again.
“Okay, here goes.” Shirley took a deep breath and cleared her throat. “My dear sister, Miriam…”
“That’s gut,” Glen interrupted.
Shirley ignored him. “Greetings in the name of the Lord. I hope all is well, but from what I’m hearing, I’m guessing there might be trouble in Oklahoma. This week Rachel Swartz spoke with me at the…”
Glen help up a hand. “You should do a little more breezy talk first, I think, instead of leaping right into the trouble subject.”
Shirley ignored him and kept on. “From what Rachel said, it sounds like Esther is trying to steal your boyfriend. I’m sorry to hear that. I know from my time out in Oklahoma that Wayne is a nice man, and I know you must love him if you plan to…”
“What are you saying?” Glen cut in.
Shirley gave him a fake smile. “See, I said we shouldn’t do this.”
“Someone is making a move on your sister’s boyfriend?”
“That’s what Rachel said. Well, not exactly like that. She said Esther, her daughter, was sorry for making a move on Miriam’s boyfriend while Miriam was visiting out here.”
“That is bad. And from the sound of things, Miriam hasn’t written you or your mamm yet if you had to get this information from another source.”
“Miriam’s a godly woman who bears her sorrows well,” Shirley said. “Better than I do.”
Glen didn’t say anything for a moment. “Do you think your sister will end the relationship?”
“I doubt it. Miriam’s probably already forgiven him.”
“And why don’t you sound happy about that? Forgiveness is a right Christian thing.”
“Would you kiss a girl while you dated someone else?”
Glen didn’t hesitate. “No, of course not. But everyone has a weakness.”
Shirl
ey glared at Glen. “If it were me, I’d bonk his head.”
Glen chuckled. “I like your spirit.”
Shirley ignored the compliment. “Lee and Mark wouldn’t act like that, and I know Daett wouldn’t. And I can’t imagine Uncle William kissing another girl while he dated Aunt Fannie.”
“Uncle William?”
“William Byler. Why? Do you know him?”
“Daett does.” Glen grinned. “They were gut friends in their rumspringa years. Small world, huh?”
“I guess,” Shirley agreed.
Glen rattled on. “As I remember it from Daett, William almost married an Englisha girl. They were secretly engaged until she broke off the relationship. Daett said William took it so hard he went to the bishop and wanted to make a church confession. Of course he couldn’t since he wasn’t a member yet. The bishop said coming back to the church was a gut enough sign of repentance, and that the years of rumspringa time were there for a reason. He said he was thankful William had found his way back.”
“I think I’ve heard enough secrets for one night,” Shirley murmured, in shock at Glen’s revelation.
Glen acted like he hadn’t heard. “So that’s the end of the story—and not a very pretty one at that. But I suppose we all have our faults.”
“Do you have faults?”
Glen laughed. “I suppose so, but not serious ones like that.”
Shirley held still on the buggy seat. Would Glen ask her if she had secrets? She didn’t really—unless kissing Jonas counted.
Glen didn’t say anything as Duke slowed on the climb up a long hill.
When they reached the top, Glen still hadn’t spoken, and Shirley sighed in relief. Her thoughts turned to Glen’s story. Did Uncle William still miss his lost Englisha girlfriend? She had a similar situation in her life. Jonas Beachy wasn’t Englisha—in fact, worse perhaps, but he was still forbidden. Maybe she should go to Bishop Wagler and confess. She could see why Uncle William would seek such a thing. Jonas would stay in her heart for a long time if something wasn’t done. Did Uncle William wish things could have been different? Like she did with Jonas? A relationship with Jonas wasn’t possible, but still…A tear slipped down Shirley’s cheek.
A Blessing for Miriam Page 15
