by Carl Leckey
Toot informs me in a mock subservient manner. “The Rolls is fuelled up and ready to go instantly at your command my Lord.”
Embarrassed I reply “Don’t be daft Toot.”
I begin walking away stop turn about and approach Toot. I confess hesitantly. “To tell you the truth I am shitting myself, you know I have to tell my misses about the baby? You might have a murder on your hands.” I add sentimentally. “Don’t change pal. I’m still not sure about this Lord business. To be honest I miss the old days when I was thick and poor without a worry in the world except old Fritz and his attempts to blow me to kingdom come.” Toot assures me. “I will always be here if you want a chat Adam. It’s strange how quickly we forget the bad times we experienced in the war but remember the good times? If I recall there was more bad than good at the time. I don’t know whether it happens to you but without warning I have flash backs to some of the horrors we saw. You know what is my worst nightmare? That time we got caught in a bombardment by that church and that awful tree. “What did that Pioneer fella call it? Oh yes the body bits tree. He was a hardnosed bugger but I supposed nothing shocked him.”
He shudders. “I was lucky in a way I had seen action in the Boar war. I thought I was prepared to face anything after my time in South Africa. But that sight lives on with me I can tell you. I don’t want any of my kids to go through anything like that.” He pauses and we light another fag. “Now let’s get back to you. Like it or not you have responsibilities now. If it means me playing along with all the upper crust nonsense when other people are about, so be it.” As we wander around the side of big house we arrive at a newish looking building with a tall chimney stack. Toot explains. “This is the boiler house. Tom told me the General had it built to central-heat the house and to power the electric generator. There is a laundry attached and all the water is drawn from artesian wells by an electric pump.
Over behind those trees is a sewage farm for processing all the waste from the house and stables the residue goes onto the fields as fertiliser. He was a very modern man the General your Granddad. Did you know he was an engineer and designed everything himself?”
I am learning more and more about my remarkable Grand Father I regret not meeting him.
Toot gives me more information about the house. “Here is something that will interest you?” He adds with a smile “You being the cave man of dressing station thirty three fame.”
Of course he is referring to my discovery of the cave system under the farm where the dressing station was located.
He continues. “Under the house and buildings are vast cellars cut out of the chalk. I had a look with Tom one day but they seemed to go for miles, we only saw the tip of the iceberg so to speak. Rumours are there is a tunnel leading down to the sea the smugglers used, but I don’t know if it is true or not.”
As we continue our walk around the boiler house he explains.
“This place is amazing the estate is more or less self-contained I’m still learning things about the place myself.” Referring to the building I inform him. “Hmmm I saw this place when I was here last but it was all boarded up and the doors were locked at the time. These are the kinds of things I want at my place in France. The house in France is located in a pretty remote site and I reckon we will have to be more or less self sufficient. I definitely want electric lights in the place.” I make a note to contact Marcel as soon as possible. Maybe I will get him over to examine the wonderful innovations on the estate.
Around the other side of the building we detect the sound of a shovel being used. On turning the corner we are confronted by a big surly looking individual. When he sees us watching him he stops shovelling coke through a hatch and straightens up.
Toot introduces me to the middle aged man with the name of Joe. He touches his forelock and without a word he disappears through a door leading to a cellar.
Toot explains. “Joe is the boiler and generator man. He originally came to the estate to help install all the equipment and stayed on to run it afterwards. Joe was an engineer in the Royal Navy during the war I heard he got torpedoed a few times. They tell me he was a normal fella when he worked here before the war, you wouldn’t think so now. He never speaks to anyone keeps himself to himself. He always seems to be on duty whatever the hour day or night.
When he joined up the boiler wasn’t used during the war because of the shortages and no one knew how to operate the thing anyway. I believe it became neglected and was in a right mess when Joe came back. Within a week he got the whole caboodle working again.” I remark.
“He sounds a good man Toot where does he live?” He informs me.
“Well according to Tom and he allegedly knows everything about everyone around here Joe is a widower and has a place in the village. But I have only seen him here on the estate he never goes into the local pub either. He doesn’t even eat with the rest of the staff Mrs Humphreys sends his food over to him. The maid leaves it by the door there and he takes it to his place down below she picks the empty dishes up later.”
I enquire. “Has he got a room down there?” Toot shakes his head. “If he has I’ve never seen it so I have no idea what it’s like in his little kingdom, he won’t allow anyone else down there you see? I have tried making conversation with him but he doesn’t want to know.”
Joe appears to be yet another victim of the war.
I inform him with concern. “I’ll have a word with Cecil and find out what I can about him. I have a lot to learn about the goings on in this place I rely on you to help me out here Toot”
I remember Gunter’s request and hand the piece of paper to him. “I have a job for you Toot, will you see if there is a field of these dimensions on the estate, it has to be clear of trees and pretty level. Before you ask, a friend of mine is thinking of landing a plane here. Mad eh? But do your best pal. He is convinced we will all be flying about in those crazy machines in a few years. Not me though.” I add with a shudder.
As we part Toot reassures me I can go to him anytime he then adds something that makes me shudder. “I have every faith in you sorting things out with you Wife Scouse. But if you do bleed please don’t do it in the Rolls. We know from experience how difficult it is to shift blood stains.” We shake hands Toot is still chuckling as I head for the house.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Denise and the baby
When I emerge from the house carrying Mathew accompanied by the trio of fussing Ladies Toot is waiting with the Rolls ticking over.
Toot loads the carriage into the car. I take Mathew wrapped up like an Eskimo onto my knee and we set off followed by all kinds of advice from the trio.
We arrive at Dover with quarter of an hour to spare. Toots parks and we transfer the baby to the perambulator I wait impatiently and nervously as close to the ferry exit as possible. The ferry is right on time and Denise is amongst the first to emerge down the gangway.
She sees me and races into to my arms. Oh the joy of having my Wife in my arms again feeling her body close to me. Unashamedly despite the people surrounding us I smother her in kisses until she prizes herself away and looks into the Perambulator. As soon as she sees Mathew is awake she removes him from the perambulator and hugs him close while kissing his cheeks.
She whispers. “My boy, My baby, My Little Mathew.”
She repeats this over and over again.
It is with great difficulty I persuade her to return Mathew to the carriage for the walk back to the Rolls. Even then I notice she doesn’t take her loving eyes off Mathew as I walk alongside carrying her bag.
At the car I introduce Toot she hugs him and says. “I feel I have known you forever I am so grateful to you for looking after my Adam during the war.” Toot, embarrassed by her praise mumbles a reply and helps load the carriage into the car. Mathew is wide awake he sits happily on Denise’s lap gurgling away as we set off for the journey home.
We travel with my arm firmly encircling my dear Wife enjoying having her close to me but dreading
what I have to reveal. Should I confess now before we arrive at the estate? What if she rejects me and wants to return to her family in France what would I do then? No I dismiss that idea I only hope there is no mention of my secret before I have the opportunity to confess to Denise myself. All these thoughts plague me on the way home to St Margaret’s. Denise giggles and remarks. “I didn’t expect to be transported by a chauffeur driven Rolls. Did you see the other passenger’s faces when Toot saluted me? I must say he looks very handsome in his livery he even has those shiny gaiter things on his legs. He looks like a figure from a film show?”
Teasing she adds. “You never told me he was such a dashing figure.” She sighs and continues.
“I once fell in love with a man in uniform.” She pauses before explaining. “Well he was more of a boy really.” I join her in laughter and hug her close to me. I imagine Toots face if he had been described as dashing in front of his mates when he wore his frequently blood stained uniform during the war. I warn her. “If you think Toot is a little out of this world as a friend of mine often says, you ain’t seen nothing yet. Wait until you feast your eyes on the estate and meet my family.”
The Ladies must have been waiting for our arrival or had a servant on lookout as we draw up at the front door Emily, Angelique and Pamela emerge to greet us. The first encounter is very successful Denise is welcomed as a family member. Despite the offers she does not part with Mathew however. The day goes well Mother Emily and Pamela go out of their way to make Denise feel at home. Thankfully they all get on well together. Pamela hands over the duties of nurse to Denise with an offer to assist anytime she is required. By mutual agreement Emily agrees to exchange rooms with us. The day culminates in a wonderful dinner party with Jonah and his Wife as our surprise guests.
Surprise! Surprise! It is Emily that calls for a toast to welcome Denise into the family. Mrs Humphreys has baked and decorated a special cake with the words Welcome Denise adorned in icing. Something comes up during the conversation over dinner that could have far reaching implications for me. Jonah is telling us a story about one of the cases he heard while in court.
A man had lied about his age to join the flying corps he was accepted and served with valour as a pilot. It was only when he tried to claim his inheritance at the age of twenty five the problem became highlighted and the family arguments began. In my case the army papers state I am two years older than my birth certificate. My passport has my true age. My French identity card has the false date. I have had no problem up to now but it could possibly give me problems in the future for example it will affect the right to vote. I decide to enlighten Jonah about the situation but not right now. I have more important things to worry about. After dinner Jonah and I retire to the billiard room with brandy and cigars leaving the five Ladies to gossip in the lounge. Whilst idly chatting during the game, Jonah discloses the reason why Mother dislikes Kathleen Bellamy. It seems it was her and her Father that persuaded Emily to make the bad investments in arms manufacturing. Before it collapsed near the end of the war they sold out themselves making a handsome profit. They did this without warning Emily. Things got heated, accusations began flying about. Emily brought a slander case against them but she has subsequently dropped it. Much to Jonahs relief as he reckoned it was a no win situation and had warned Emily continually to drop it to no avail.
The moment appeared right. I used the opportunity of us being together to admit I had a similar problem to the client he told us about. The different recorded ages on my passport and my army discharge papers. Jonah informed me there were lots of cases similar to mine coming to light. He assured me he would sort it out for me.
It has been a long day the transfer to Emily’s room sited alongside the nursery has been completed. Thankfully Denise has no problem asking Pamela’s advice and accepts it gracefully. Now Denise and I are alone on a settee in front of the nursery fire. Mathew is tucked up in his bed fast asleep. Oddly I feel slightly awkward as if I was on a first date.
I begin to cuddle and kiss her although she responds somehow it does not feel quite the same as it did before I left on my trip.
I have to do it before I go any further I must confess.
“Denise. My love I have something I have to tell you, it’s about Mathew.”
I feel her physically tense then she kisses me deeply and whispers. “I knew as soon as I saw him, any doubts I had disappeared immediately. You are his Father aren’t you and Peggy, poor Peggy, his Mother?”
“How did you guess Denise? How long have you known about this?” Without a word she retrieves her handbag from the bedroom and extracts a letter. The envelope is a mass of redirection addresses. I know instantly what the contents of the letter entail without bothering to read it. It is the letter Peggy sent informing me of the birth of Mathew.
Denise says calmly. “I only have to compare Mathew and you together, there’s no doubting you are his Father.”
I apologise profusely. “There is no excuse for what I did.”
After stating this I then begin making excuses for my conduct.
“You had left me, for good as far as I knew. Peggy was on her own after her husband was killed. She was lonely and trapped into a life looking after Tommy’s sick Mother, day and night. I was lonely and I admit angry without you. It just happened I can assure you it was not planned in any way. I tried to tell you on many occasions but I was afraid of losing you.
Instead I took the cowards way out and pretended it never happened.” I pause, waiting for an angry reaction, any reaction, when none comes I ask glumly “Where do we go from here Denise? Whatever you decide to do I don’t blame you?”
She puts her fingers over my lips. “Adam my love I forgive you. Believe me I know what it is like to be lonely. We have the Son I have always wanted. We both know I can never have a child of my own. As far as I am concerned he is our Son. Peggy came into your life and gave us a gift. It has been a long and tiring day let us retire now and face a brand new day together tomorrow. No need for any more apologies.
Father Peter taught me confession is good for the soul and you chose to confess. All is forgiven our life with our Son begins from now.”
Denise casts the unread letter into the fire a symbolic gesture of closing that chapter in our lives. There is one more delicate subject I need to discuss. It is with apprehension I decide now is as good as any time to ask her opinion. “Denise what do you think about the situation between er Emily and Pamela?” She responds with a smile. “You are referring to their love for each other of course?” Feeling somewhat embarrassed I reply. “Er Yes.” She smiles again before replying. “Adam I know you believe I lead a very sheltered life. In many ways I did, but as you know I spent time in a convent. The love between two women is not as uncommon as you think. If Emily and Pamela are content and it is obvious they love each other deeply. Good luck to them. It doesn’t bother me in the least. I now have two loves in my life.” She adds in a dramatic manner. “And let no man or woman attempt to break us asunder.”
I leave her in the small room straightening the covers on Mathew’s cot. In the bedroom I feverishly cast my clothes aside.
Thank goodness I survived that ordeal with my marriage and body intact. With more than a little haste I have a wash dive into bed and wait impatiently and I must add, expectantly for her to join me.
Five minutes pass, followed by another ten minutes, still no sign of my Wife. I climb out of bed and listen by Mathew’s room. I detect no movement. Pressing my ear to the door I detect nothing. I try opening the door to find it firmly locked. I tap softly unwilling to wake the child while enquiring. “Are you coming to bed my love?”
Denise replies. “I am already in bed my love.” Stunned by her reply I ask. “Are you coming out or will you let me in?” She replies accompanied by an exaggerated yawn. “No my love you will have to keep Jolly Roger company yourself until Wow, wow and I decide you have been punished enough.” She adds. “That could be for a long, long, time if
not for ever. Good night sweet dreams my love.”
I am sure I detect one of her musical giggles as I slink back to the huge empty double bed.
I lie awake for hours considering the injustice I am suffering. It is about three o’clock when I last look at my watch. I must have eventually dozed off. Suddenly I am awoken by the movement of a body snuggling close to me. Yippee! My punishment spell is over Jolly Roger meets wow wow for the first time in a month and a half and it is a fantastic reunion.
When I awake about seven o’clock Denise is not in our bed. I find her in the nursery playing with Mathew where I join her. He has soon bonded with her and it is a joy to see them together. I casually remark. “I bet Pamela and Emily miss the little fellow they have been so close since we adopted him especially Pamela. To be honest I was getting slightly jealous and had words with them yesterday I was ashamed afterwards.” Denise replies. “I won’t be making that mistake I realise how much he means to them. When you and Jonah were playing billiards last night I made an agreement to share our time with Mathew until we leave for home.
I shall have him at night and in the mornings unless I want a break. They have him in the afternoons up until evening. I want to see him to bed though, that’s my own time with him. Does that seem fair to you?” “That’s wonderful Denise, thank you for being so generous. I love you and this little fella.” I hug them both and enquire are you coming down to breakfast or are you having yours sent up here?”
She replies firmly. “No. From now on we should all take our meals together down stairs except for dinner of course.”
As we make our way down the stairs I remind Denise. “We need to discuss when we are going home?
By the way, you do know they would like us to stay over for Christmas don’t you? I would like to be with my family but I leave it to you to make the decision. That reminds me Denise I thought Louise was coming over with you. What happened I heard there were problems with Billy and a truck?”
