Steve walked me around the room a few times, before shoving me back under the icy cold water. I fought him with more strength this time as I started to sober up. “That’s it baby, fight for this. Fight to come back to me, fight to live.” He insisted. Pouring more cold water down my neck, damn that hurt so badly. Why couldn’t he just let me sleep? I was so tired; I grew grouchy punching him as he turned me around to lift me out for yet another walk around the room. Catching him in the chest. “Nice hit.” He commented as he repeated the actions until he felt I was sober enough to survive, my pulse growing stronger, healthier.
I was unsteady on my feet, and very tired, but I felt less of the drug’s effects on me finally. Steve's arm was wrapped firmly around me, as he helped me walk to the sofa, and settled me down on it. Checking me over so carefully, he looked so terrified that he could lose me. I’d never seen anyone look at me like that, never thought that I would either. No one cared about the fucked up kid anymore. He had changed my clothes, dried me off, covered me with a blanket and was now toweling my hair dry so I could rest comfortably. Talking quietly words of comfort as he did so, telling me how much he loved me, needed me, how beautiful I was, how special, how talented. Telling me all the things I needed to hear, that no man had ever said to me before.
The situation could have been far better; I was bitterly disappointed that he was here, seeing me at my weakest. I smelt something foul and realized I must have been ill several times before I'd got enough of the pills out of my system to awaken. I was humiliated, I never allowed anyone to see me when my mind was acting up. I always hid from everyone, never wanting to share my worse parts with anyone. It was far too intimate for my liking; I didn't let anyone in, ever. If this really was love starting to stir in my chest, if we two were going to have a future together, how could I ever forget that he had seen me as a disgusting freak? I wanted to die just so he couldn’t see my weakness anymore. Why couldn’t he just leave me alone, leave my life or death to the fates?
Steve knelt by my side and held my hand, it felt so good. "Seems to me that you really strongly have an obsession with dying, you need to get over that Vicky. You need to accept you have a future, a bright one, not just to die young and pretty. You can make it baby, you can be everything you ever dreamed of. I promise you that, I want to help you."
I smiled at him wryly, "Seems to me that you have an obsession with saving my life!" I countered, “I’m nothing, no one, I will never make anything of myself.”
"Then maybe you just need something to live for." He suggested, “You were never nothing to me, you are far too special for that. You are everything to me, my whole world!”
Before I could answer him mouth clasped onto mine in a deep kiss. I found myself responding without realizing, the passion growing inside me I kissed back my head spinning and not just from what I'd taken. I wanted to stay in this moment forever, the easy comfortable attitude between us, mixed with a large dose of lust.
When he pulled away I felt exhausted and weak. The world span again, and darkness approached swiftly, I had passed out again before he had even lowered my head back down onto the sofa as gently as he could. Taking such good care of me, showing a love I didn’t deserve, could barely understand.
"Sleep well my beloved, awaken to a beautiful blessed future." he kissed my hair and let me rest.
Dreams came that night shadowy and distant, over it all I could hear his voice comforting me and keeping me safe. I felt calm and comforted in a way I had never known before. In my dreams he was there with me, walking hand in hand along the cliff top where he had first saved me. Fighting off shadowy figures, the demons and nightmares I had endured for so long. A bright light came from inside him that gave the shadow creatures nowhere to hide. I woke a few times during the night to see Steven sitting in the chair across from me just watching over me, falling asleep listening to him humming a tune I distantly remembered from my past.
When I finally awoke again, sun was streaming through the window into a strange room. Not the one I had fallen asleep in, but it wasn't a bad thing when my eyes started to focus on my own things. Steve had taken me back to my own bedroom, and my own home. I looked at the clock; it was lunchtime and the date? I had been asleep for two days! How had no one noticed?
I was up and dressed in moments. When I went downstairs my parents were gone, not uncommon and there was a note saying they would be away for a few weeks on business. Again, quite normal. I could smell food, and followed my nose into the kitchen to find hot food waiting for me. A plate filled with hot bacon sandwiches, and I could guess who had made them. I was starving and destroyed the food quickly.
It was too late to go to college, so I picked up my bag and went for a walk. The air smelt fresh and clear and the walking felt good. I passed by the shops without really looking at them and found my way into the woods. My favorite place to be, there no one would disturb me, normally.
Although the last few times Steven had located me pretty easily. For a while I wandered, stopping to look at flowers and birds along the way. For once I felt calm, and untroubled. I tired quickly in the fresh air and soon had to stop for a rest. I sat for a while beside the river, splashing the water idly. Taking my shoes off and soaking my feet in the cool, clear water; there was nothing I would rather do right now, than relax in this idyllic setting. The sun was beating down on me, very warm for the time of year. My eyes grew heavy, and I laid back to enjoy a few moments rest in the sunshine...
Hours later as the sun was setting the cooler air woke me up. I had slept the afternoon away as well. I hadn't slept so much in years. Steven had bewitched me, for once the exhaustion that always beat down on my bones started to lift. I felt stronger than I had since before the relationship with Toby. I was starting to change, an inner confidence edging out of my subdued persona.
The trail was difficult to see on the way back so I cut back into the town to walk home that way. As I passed the pub I saw some of my college mates, they beckoned me over and handed me a drink. I sat there with them a while and barely touched the drinks they kept handing me. It held no interest for me anymore; I watched them getting drunk with a growing sense of boredom. I didn’t want to be here, they were just pathetic creatures downing crazy amounts of vodka and rum to survive. I didn't need to get drunk to get through the day I discovered, slightly shocked.
I hadn't been without drink for years. Constantly in a stage of drunk, getting drunk or coming down from being drunk. That was just my life, and I had accepted that bitter truth. I hadn’t looked for or expected anything else from my life, given up on making anything of myself just as everyone else had.
It was a very solemn walk home that night eating chips from a paper bag. Maybe Steven had been right, I just needed a reason to live again? The very thought of him left me hungry for another kiss. The confusion in my mind hadn't got much better, but at least I was sober. I guessed that was a start at least, something to build on. Part of me was still terrified of what he meant to me, the biggest part of me telling me to run before it was too late and I fell for him any harder. The feeling of knowing him more than I should grew every day. That face, that voice from my dreams. A puzzle I would have to work out soon, I always enjoyed a good challenge.
The Vampire Legacies Book One:
The Scarlet Drop
Chapter Four
Strange dreams peppered my thoughts that night; Steven was there, always there, by my side. I saw fractured images of times long ago, yet it was still us. We were dancing in a ballroom in a grand house; I was dressed in a beautiful old fashioned gown. High society meeting, everyone so well to do. Yet all I could concentrate on was the dancing, the man who swept me off my feet. Then there was a medieval image, where I shot arrows at a target while he watched me. A log cabin in the woods, where we just lay in front of a roaring open fire lost in each other’s arms.
I did believe in past lives, I knew I’d had several. A medium had once read me as being a knight and then an archer in med
ieval times. She had also spoken of two lives in ancient Egypt as a temple dancer, and a high priestess. Both time frames had always fascinated me, and the first time I had picked up a long bow at a medieval fair I had known how to use it. So I was open to the idea of having existed before. I had too many memories to have just existed for one life, at times I felt a lot older than my 20 odd years as well.
The nightmares were not just of my ex’s and the life I had lived now. I saw other girls raped, over and over again that felt like they were me. I saw images of me standing on a battle field covered in blood, bodies piled at my feet. Of being in a prison tortured for decades. They always said the strongest memories came back first, the most vivid. Those were normally the bad, not the good. The bad memories had been haunting my dreams for years now, only blotted out when I was drunk enough to not be able to dream.
To slip between pleasant dreams, memories, was a nice change. I wondered if Steven had always been a vampire, if what I saw had been just one life for him or many as it had been for me. He never seemed to change, although my mental image changed little from life to life as well. I wondered if the library scene I knew so well was another memory not an image of the future as I had thought a few days ago.
The next morning came too soon, waking me from a peaceful sleep. I dressed slowly, lingering over the best thing to wear, just in case I saw my beloved. Crazy how I could think of a man I barely know like that. Or maybe I knew him deeper than I ever could imagine? Thinking of all I had learned during the night, trying to put my dreams into an order. A kind of timeline in my head to try and track who I used to be so I could understand the person I am now. If I could control the images I received in my dreams, I might be able to understand the good and bad of my lives. I even bought a new notebook on the way to class to try and make notes of what I knew already.
College went by in a breeze; the day just seemed to race through. Classes were easier than usual; I seemed to know the answers whenever I was asked something. There were plenty of free periods between my studies to sneak to the library and work on my timelines. I even skipped lunch to sit there working on it all, just grabbing a sandwich from the canteen on my way to the library again. By the end of the day I had a large amount of text and doodles to work through. I was happy for once, even singing softly to my music as I bounced between classes. It had been too long since I had been able to do anything creative. Maybe love suited me? Or maybe this was just the calm before yet another storm.
As I left the library at the end of the day, Toby was waiting for me, "Fancy a ride?" he sneered as I passed him. He was rolling a cigarette looking all too calm for my liking.
"Why bother, the first time was nothing to write home about!" I couldn't believe it came from my mouth. I carried on, walking in fear that he might respond. I passed my secret vampire in the corridor without even seeing him, but that might as much have been his choice as mine. Where had the strength inside of me come from? This core of inner steel which kept me fighting on? I had experienced it only a handful of times in my life, it kicked in just in time to save my life. To make me stand up and be counted after a beating, when anyone else would just give up.
As I crossed the dark car park to get to my car, I knew I wasn't alone. Toby came up behind me and slammed me against the car hood, I screamed. No one would hear me, he would have his way again, and I knew it in my soul. He turned me over, and stuck his tongue roughly into my mouth. I was so angry, so frustrated that a man could do this to me yet again. I wouldn’t be a victim again; I couldn’t allow him to violate me.
Steve was the other side of the car park rushing towards us, I had no idea he was there. Suddenly from deep inside me I felt something snap. I bit down hard into the tongue in my mouth, blood pouring into my mouth and throat. I shoved Toby away from me with strength I never knew I had. He looked shocked, and horrified that I had stopped him. But I wasn't done yet, I kneed him hard in the crotch, and he fell to the ground. The self-defense training kicking in at long last or perhaps the fighting training gained from other lives? I felt more like myself then I had forever, like I needed the adrenaline surge to ‘wake up’.
He was writhing on the floor in front of me. I couldn't stop; I kicked him in the chest again and again. I was crying, and I couldn't see. But I could feel that man who had hurt me so much so I fell to my knees and punched him until I could breathe again. I was hysterical, part of my mind knew, but the rest of me was away with the fairies. I saw the beaten boy in front of me and it sickened me. I climbed into my car and floored the gas pedal; I had to escape this place.
I don't know how I didn't crash the car, I was driving blind. Nauseated by what I'd done, but glad too that he hurt the same way he'd hurt me. It was justice in a way, that the beaten had become the beater. Apart from the blood that stained my clothing, the copper smell that filled my car. The sickness grew inside of me, I had to stop. I pulled over and fell out of the car, emptying my guts all over the side of the road. I lay there for a while, my mind in a whirl. I had nearly killed a man, for all I knew he would still die from what I had done. I never thought I could do that to anyone, I never thought the anger that rode inside of me, and the darkness would spill out in such a fashion. I was a monster, a cruel heartless abuser no better than the man who had tortured me for so long. I couldn’t live with myself for committing such a foul crime; I had to fix what I had done. Toby was evil, of that I had no doubt, but evil or not he didn’t deserve what I had done.
That decided, I climbed back into the car, I had to make amends for my misdeed. I drove to the hospital, and asked after Toby Windsor. I had to lie and say I was his girlfriend to get in. The nurse took me to a private room, inside the boy was in a coma, beaten by a gang of youths she had said. I could barely hear her words as I stood there taking in what I had done to the boy.
Finally she left me alone there. I stood by his bed head and looked at the man I had once loved so much I thought I'd be with him forever. What a human idea, forever. Just a few months it had been really, I’d been so very young I had believed all the lies he had spun me. I knew so little about love he must have found it easy to play the innocent girl I had once been. The innocent girl that now had blood on her hands and held his life in those digits.
What I had to do now would not be easy, it could kill me instead of him, but I didn’t care now. I had to find some form of redemption, the only way I knew how. I held my hands over his body and felt for his wounds, cracked ribs, broken nose, many bruises and cuts, even head trauma. I had done a lot of damage; they were not even sure if Toby would ever wake up or if he would be the same again. I concentrated, pulling up a power I hadn't used for years, I felt a warm glow around my hands and I felt around the wounds healing some, leaving others that weren't too bad. Healing had always been my strongest magical talent, that and seeing the things that others didn’t. Puzzle solving; Toby had once used me as ‘gaming eyes’ when he was on his computer knowing there was rarely a dungeon I could not beat if I really put my mind to it. I could notice the tiniest little thing on the edge of the screen that no one else could, find the bugs in the programming to use to my advantage, cheat games sometimes.
When I had finished my work the boy looked far better and I knew that I had done what I had to. He would soon wake and I had to get out of there. The only problem was my body wasn't responding to my minds commands anymore, I found myself slipping down the wall onto the floor landing with a smack. My head was spinning; I felt like I could sleep for a week, I had given too much as always. Burning into my own life force. But I couldn’t rest here; I couldn't stay near this creature that had caused me so much harm.
I grabbed the side of the bed and dragged myself upright. Stumbling into the corridor and back out to the car park, ignoring the looks of the other nurses assuming I was way passed the legal limit. My car, it was there just in front of me. Just a few more feet. Oh look, Steve is here my mind supplied dully. I rested my hands on the hood of the car leaning heavily to support mysel
f. Magic and a weakened body really didn't mix well together that was for sure. Drunk would have been far easier than this; if I really wanted to I could always have healed away my lack of sobriety. I just had never wanted to, I allowed myself to feel its effects. Whereas now, I couldn’t push away the exhaustion crushing me.
"Why did you save him?" he asked.
I looked up at him and answered simply "Because I could." My knees buckled then, I couldn't stand anymore.
Steve caught me as I fell. He followed me down to the ground, "What's wrong with you?" he demanded.
He looked so scared, I wanted to touch him, to reassure him but I was losing the battle to stay awake. "Must rest." I muttered, "Please take me home."
I must have passed out then, or at least slipped into a semi awake state. I had no strength left, my limbs too heavy to move. I didn't know if I would live or die at this point, I had burned my pure essence to heal a man I hated. I didn't even know why I had done it, I would have loved to see him die, I guess just not at my own hand.
Steve must have picked me up then, because I felt my head gently laid on his shoulder as he moved me into the car. I dozed off again as he drove me home, knowing whatever happened he would protect me.
The Vampire Legacies Book One
The Scarlet Drop
Chapter Five
Dreams that night were not so easy to take neither comfort from nor escape. The smell of the blood, the actions of beating someone brought back memories I tried to suppress as best I could. Building a wall around them to keep them leaking into my mind, no barriers seemed to keep them out this time. I was cursed to spend the night trapped in a nightmare no one could help me escape from. The nightmare of my own guilty nature.
The Scarlet Drop: The Vampire Legacies Book One Page 3
