“Good.”
She quieted and held her breath as Adam began brushing the hair away from her face. His hands, as big as they were, were always so surprisingly gentle when he touched her.
“You and your family were very close, weren’t you?” he asked.
“Yes,” Nellie replied. “My mother and I were, definitely. She was the one who continued with my studies after the nuns fled. She taught me how to read, as well as a bit of the French language, although I am rusty now. I used to be close to my father when I was very young, but after what Una did, he seemed to be a shell of his former self. I wondered sometimes if he blamed himself for what happened. I wish I could tell him that I don’t blame him at all, and that it was never his fault.”
Nellie lifted her head up and looked Adam straight in the eye. “If we are to be married,” she told him, “then we much learn to trust each other. As much as I like being with you, I don’t know if it would be wise marrying you if we have two very different viewpoints about the intersecting events in our lives.” Adam didn’t respond. She sighed and settled her head back down in his lap. “You never talked much about your life and your family. I know you were close to them as well.”
“Aye,” Adam said softly. “Well, my mother died giving birth to me, as you know. Lachina did all that she could to save my birth mother, but at the end, it was either my life or hers, an’ my mother chose my life. When I first heard that story, I couldn’t stop feelin’ guilty.”
“But it was not your fault she died,” Nellie insisted.
He shrugged. “But in a way, it was my fault. If I was never born, she would perhaps still be here today, livin’ happily with my father. Having Una as my stepmother helped relieve the guilt I felt. By all means, she loved me just as a birth mother should, which makes it so hard to wrap my head around that she could really be a… a leannan sith that had set out to destroy your family.” Adam held out a hand.
“But I’m not saying that it’s not possible,” he added, knowing what Nellie was about to say. “But you must understand: it is like sayin’ that your mother is a fairy from the Unseelie Court who secretly destroyed some innocent family. It’s an absurd thought, is it not?
His words did make sense. It would be inconceivable and ridiculous if someone were to walk up to her and say that her mother was a leannan sith. Why did she assume that Adam would think otherwise when Una had raised him so lovingly?
“Despite all of that,” Adam continued. “Una acted so queerly ever since my father died. It’s like all the love she gave me suddenly stopped upon his death. Perhaps her love died with him.” He shrugged. “I hope you can remain patient with me as I sort everythin’ out.”
His request was more than she’d expected. “Yes, of course.” She leaned her head back onto his lap and yawned.
“You’re tired,” Adam stated. “Here, let me put the food away.”
Nellie reluctantly rolled off his lap and Adam stored the food back into the leather wraps. “You can stay out here by the fire,” Adam told her when he was finished. “I can stay in a guest room.”
“Are you sure?” Nellie asked as she put fresh blankets on her bed. “It must be dreadfully cold in there. We can pull a bed out here in the hall without a problem, and there are extra blankets.”
“No, that’s quite all right,” Adam said. “If I am to be honest, I would love to sleep near you, as we did at Rosach Castle, but the more I am near you, the more I fear that I can’t stay away.”
“And that frightens you?” Nellie asked softly.
“I’ve never felt this way before, so in a way, it does frighten me,” he admitted. “But not in a bad way, no.” He gazed at her with a look she knew to be desire. It was the same look she saw when they picnicked by the standing stone and when she first kissed him outside of Dunaid Castle. He looked to say something else, but then changed his mind, blinking the desire in his eyes away.
“Call to me if you need anythin’,” he said.
“Yes, I will,” Nellie whispered.
He is more prude than a nun, Nellie thought after Adam’s hasty departure from the great hall. She sighed as she settled underneath her blankets. It was strange being back in her bed. She half-expected to fall asleep with her parents nearby in their own beds, as they did night after night during the cold months.
She expected to wake up and have everything that had happened to her in Dunaid be a dream. Her mother would be ready with the morning meal, her father would go out to hunt for dinner, and she would be in her room, reading or practicing her script.
But if everything had remained the same, would she have ever met Adam?
Nellie awoke some time during the night. The fire had died down to a few burning coals and the rain had also stopped. The only sound of moisture was the drops of dew from the treetops hitting the roof of the castle. Nellie rolled over to her side and closed her eyes again, hoping to quickly fall back asleep, but a glowing light seen through her eyelids made her quickly open them again. She followed the ball of light as it glided over her bed and hovered just at the foot of it.
Was she seeing visions? Going mad?
No, there was a fairy in the room with her.
A sickeningly and intoxicating scent of roses mixed with lavender filled Nellie’s senses as she shot up in bed. The ball of light transformed into the shape of a tall woman, then slowly faded to reveal the woman’s features.
Una.
Chapter 22
She knew without ever seeing the woman in person that it was Una who stood the room with her. However, it was not Una in the flesh, but an apparition. Nellie could see through the leannan sith, as though she was a spirit of the dead.
She was surprised to find that Una did not look much older than herself. She had beautiful raven-black hair and brown eyes that shone bright like amber. A small blush stained her pale cheeks and she folded her delicate hands together in front of her. She looked more like a gentle mother than a wicked fairy.
“What do you want from me?” Nellie asked and froze as the fairy walked closer to her. A smile lit her face like she was happy to see her. Nellie knew she should feel fear, but instead, she felt a strange desire to have the fairy come closer to her.
Ach, she has me under a spell!
“Oh, you beautiful child,” Una told her. She reached forward and took a lock of Nellie’s golden hair in her hands. “You look just like your mother, you know? I believe she was about the same age as you when I last saw her. Maybe a little older. What was that, fifteen years ago? My, how time flies when you can live for centuries,” Una laughed. “Of course, you were just a little thing back then, so you probably don’t remember me, but I would watch you readin’ books, writin’ letters… Oh, how you loved to learn.”
She was spying on me while I was imprisoned at Burrach? Nellie thought, horrified. But the spell instead made her smile stupidly at the leannan sith. She was repulsed by how her body craved for Una to touch her hair again.
“What do you want from me?” Nellie repeated the question. The words made her feel out of breath, like she had just exerted herself from running.
Una acted like she did not hear her. “An’ what fate brings you here to Dunaid, to fall in love with my stepson? Aye, to marry my stepson. In a way, I just love that kind of romance—two enemies findin’ love—but on the other hand, I hate it. I hate that Malcolm’s daughter gets to find the happiness I never had with him. It is unfair. And the way you look so much like Abigail… it makes me feel like I’m reliving that nightmare all over again.”
“My father never loved you,” Nellie told her. “And Adam and I aren’t married.”
Una looked surprised. “If not, then what are you doin’ with each other here in Burrach? I’ve been here all day. I’ve seen the way he looks at you an’ the way he speaks to you. I know when he speaks with love. But you know what? He will always love his stepmother more than he will ever love you. Does he even believe your family was cursed? How could he love you if he does
n’t believe a word you say?”
Nellie could sense the jealousy in the leannan sith’s voice. She had a weak spot, but she still was a powerful, magical being and Nellie needed to have her wits about her.
“Are you going to kill me?” Nellie whispered. If so, she prayed it would be quick.
“I could,” Una said without compunction. She pursed her lips and stared up at the ceiling as she considered it. “It would be ever so easy. Humans are beautiful, but they are also so wretchedly weak.” She shook her head. “Nay, for the Lyalls, sufferin’ is much more satisfying than a simple death.”
Was she was going to lay another curse on her? Nellie clenched her jaw, but failed to stave off her anger. “Just do it and be done with it, you old hag,” she spat.
Faster than a blink, Una had her hands around Nellie’s throat. And although Una’s physical body was not really there, she felt cold fingers grip her skin tightly. She gasped for air.
“Watch your tongue, wench,” Una said fiercely. “Should that be what route I should go? A mute girl? Nay, that isn’t so bad of a punishment. What’s worse? Ah, yes. What pretty blue eyes you have, even when they’re filled with tears. How do you imagine it would be like to live in complete darkness for the rest of your days? It would be like a prison for you all over again, although this time, you won’t be able to read, or write, or see Adam’s handsome face. You would be in a prison of your own mind.”
Una wants me to beg for mercy, Nellie thought. But she would never give in to that. She would never give Una the satisfaction of having her fall to her knees, begging her not to curse her again. Aye, perhaps I am a bit too proud.
“Do it, then,” she dared the fairy. “At least I would never have to see your hideous face again.”
Una laughed a shrilling sound that made Nellie want to cover her ears. How was Adam not awoken by this?
“I sense the bitterness and anger in your words, lass. If your father would have had me all those years ago, then none of this would have happened. Be angry with him, not at me.”
“My da loved my ma and no one else. Convincing me otherwise is folly.”
“Oh, you sweet child. You’re as naïve as your mother, thinking Malcolm loved her.” She put her hand on Nellie’s forehead and Nellie realized she was not able to pull away from the touch.
“What are you doing?” Nellie gasped. Una was no longer the beautiful, young woman, but a terrifying creature, with blue skin and arms and legs longer than any normal human. Her mouth and eyes were hollow and she stood about the height of the great hall.
Nellie tried to recoil as tendrils of black emitted from Una’s arms and traveled from the leannan sith’s shoulders down to her hands and into Nellie’s eye sockets. She could not move a single muscle in her body, not even to blink. A piercing cold burned into her eyes, causing Nellie to scream with pain.
“What are you doing to me?”
“I am letting you see a world of darkness, as my world has been since your father left me.”
“He never loved you.” Nellie gasped and doubled over in pain. She had control back to her body, but she was too weak from the pain to move. “Adam, help me!” she yelled.
“He cannot hear you, girl. I saw to that.”
The searing pain did not stop. Her nose burned. She screamed until tears spilled from her eyes. She thought she heard Adam call out to her and Una mutter an oath. She also thought that she felt arms encircle her body, but all she could focus on was how she could end the terrible pain.
And then, it stopped. Nellie slowly opened her eyes and blinked, trying to clear away the curtain of darkness that framed her vision.
“Nellie, what happened?”
He was too late, much too late.
Adam was sitting next to her on the bed. She turned toward him, trying to focus on his face, but his features were obscured, like she was looking at him through a foggy glass.
“Adam,” she gasped, panicked. “I think I am going blind.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, I’m sure!” she snapped. She wiped the tears from her face. “I can’t believe it. I…”
“Perhaps you are sick? The blue sickness, or…”
“Nay, Adam. It was Una. She visited me in a vision. You didn’t hear her? Didn’t you see her?”
She could sense his skepticism without even seeing his face clearly. “In a vision?” he repeated.
“Yes, she cursed me because I’m with you. She cursed me because I look like my mother.” She began to laugh hysterically at the notion. “Why can’t this all be a terrible dream?”
“Are you sure it wasn’t just a dream?”
“It was real, Adam! Why don’t you believe me?”
“I never said that I didn’t. I am just considerin’ the options. Please, stay calm.”
“How can I stay calm if I’m losing my vision?”
“We’ll figure it out,” he said adamantly. “Perhaps you have a fever, or this has something to do with your head injury. Lie down. Let me get you some water.” Before he did that, though, he lit a few candles. “Can you see better now?”
“Barely,” she replied. “It’s like there is a thin sheet of fabric covering my eyes.” Nellie sat back on her pillows and looked up at the ceiling, trying, wishing, praying that the dark shroud around her vision would dissipate.
“Perhaps it’s not the blue sickness, but something else,” Adam said when he returned with water.
Nellie’s eyes filled up with tears of frustration. “What will it take for you to believe me?” she asked mournfully.
“Nellie, I’m the type of person that needs to see things with my own eyes.”
“I’m going blind. Isn’t that proof enough?” She shook her head furiously. “Leave me,” she demanded.
“As you wish.”
She listened to the rain as it started back up again. She knew not where Adam went, and now, she cared not. It happened to her again. She was cursed. She never would be able to escape Una’s wrath, especially when the man who supposedly cared for her didn’t even believe her.
But it wasn’t quite Adam’s fault. At least, not completely. Fairies do know how to charm people, both Seelie and Unseelie, and Una seemed to have been successful in charming Adam. She even charmed Nellie for a short while, despite her revulsion. Nellie needed to find a way for him to see Una in her true form. Either that, or she would perhaps end up staying at Burrach.
Part of her wanted to give up, but no, she must stay strong for her parents’ sakes. They couldn’t escape Una, but she would be able to. She would find a way.
Nellie didn’t realize she’d fallen asleep until she woke up sometime in the morning. The rain had stopped and she heard the soft crackle of the fireplace stirring to life.
“How do you feel?” She was surprised that Adam was nearby, stroking the fire.
“I’m absolutely fine, Adam,” Nellie said. “Save for my eyes, of course.”
“No fever, no aches, no chills?”
Nellie shook her head, biding her patience.
“Well, that’s good at least.”
“It’s not the blue sickness.”
“Aye,” was all Adam said. He glanced out the window. “The storm has passed. Let us make haste to Dunaid in case this is just a calm time between storms.”
For a wistful moment, Nellie thought again about staying at Burrach. Perhaps she would hire a few servants to help her. Ach, but that is just me wanting to give up again, she reasoned with herself. I will not stand for that.
“We’ll find a way fix this,” Adam told her, reading her thoughts.
“Persuade you stepmother to reverse the curse and you shall. She loves you. I heard the way she spoke about you. I believe she’ll do anything for you.”
“What did she say?” he began, but then shook his head “No, never mind. Let’s get out of here.”
Nellie stood up and tried to get her belongings in order despite her impaired vision, but it took her about twice as long as it
normally should. Adam ended up helping her, taking her gently by the arm as he led her out of the castle and to the stables, both of their bags slung around his shoulders.
“Are you going to be able to ride your horse on your own?” Adam asked.
“I believe so.”
She didn’t say a word as Adam lifted her up by her waist and swung her gracefully over Poppy’s back. “Here,” he said, and tied a rope connecting from his saddle to Nellie’s bridle. “I will take the lead and Poppy will follow me.”
Nellie struggled to hold back tears as they traversed back down the old path and toward the forest. It seemed that with each step they took, the less she could see. Adam would turn around and glance at her every now and then and she could tell he seemed worried. When they were back in the forest, Bhreac appeared almost immediately, fluttering gaily around them, chattering nonsensically, before realizing something was amiss.
“What is wrong with Miss Nellie?” he asked worriedly.
“She is ill,” Adam replied curtly.
“I am not,” Nellie snapped at the man, then took a deep breath. The fairy landed gracefully on the top of Poppy’s head and looked at her concernedly. “Bhreac, I’m so sorry. I should’ve listened to you.”
“Oh, no!” Bhreac cried, wringing his small hands together. “Was it the leannan sith? What did she do?”
“She cursed me again. The leannan sith took my vision from me. Bhreac, are you able to reverse a curse?”
She didn’t need to see him clearly to know how crestfallen he became. The tone of his voice said it all. Her own heart dropped as well.
“Nay, I cannot. Unseelie magic is very different from Seelie magic. It’s the difference between light and dark. You would need the same leannan sith to reverse it for you.” He paused in thought, then shot a finger up in the air. “Ah, but I can do something for you.”
He flittered off for a moment, leaving Nellie and Adam to look at each other questioningly. Finally, the pixie flew back.
Lady Nellie Page 15
