Point 3: The final point I’ll share is one I’ve believed for a long time. David said 90% of happiness was surrounding yourself with the right people. David can thrive because the people in his life—from his wife and family to his coworkers and friends—inspire him, support him, and love him. That is 90% of the battle. The remaining 10% is making enough money to put food on the table and a roof over your head, with enough left over to buy the things you need. Combine that with a career based on solid principles that align with your passion and contribute to the greater good, and you will be all right in life.
* * *
If a course in Major Life Decision Making did exist, the hour I spent with David would have made for a great lecture. I realized that it is not about what you do, but how you do it that matters. Our conversation wasn’t about how to find a job; it was about how to live your life. I decided that when I begin my post-college career search, I would focus less on job descriptions and company profiles and, instead, focus my attention inward. What are the core principles in my life? What do I love to do? How can I contribute to the world? Only then could I look for a career that aligned with those answers. I would build a foundation before the house.
Our conversation also helped me see the career search within the context of the bigger picture. When David receives praise and attention for his efforts, he is quick to point out and praise others who are working equally hard to make a difference. He is not in it for fame and attention—he is in it for the community and the greater good. That is a powerful characteristic to have, and one that resonated from our conversation.
The job or career search can easily become a quest for me. Where can I make the most money, where can I get the best benefits, where can I shine? The job market is tough—you have to be looking out for yourself—but David shows the power of turning that mindset around. Yes, it was my job, my career, and my life, but instead of searching for the job or career that creates the biggest impact on me, why not find a career where I can have an impact on others—where I can contribute to the greater good?
Tom Crawford
Sweetwater Café in Ann Arbor, Michigan
Medium brewed coffee
Every career path is unique—even if the destination is the same.
Two weeks before Cup 6, while sitting with my friend Brett at a coffee shop, I met Tom Crawford. Brett, who had recently graduated, was in town for a business meeting with Tom; Grand Traverse Pie Company had been one of our favorite places to do homework, so we met there before his meeting to get some work done.
When Tom arrived, Brett introduced us, and within an hour, Tom and I had a coffee meeting scheduled for Sweetwater Cafe in Ann Arbor the following Friday. I figured if Brett liked Tom, I would too.
* * *
The only thing I knew about Tom going into the meeting was that he was an entrepreneur and loved to travel. Those were two of my biggest interests, so I knew finding things to talk about wouldn’t be a challenge. When he arrived at the coffee shop, we ordered our drinks, found a spot in the corner next to the large picture window, and started talking. I asked him a few questions, and the resulting answers illustrated the career path he’d traveled down since he left college.
But before I get to that, let me take a quick tangent. Brett was one of my best friends in college (and the inspiration for 52 Cups). The reason was our mutual enthusiasm for entrepreneurship. When we first met, it was clear we shared the same perspective on postgrad plans: we wanted to bypass the 8-5 cubicle life of a corporate ladder-climber and go straight into the world of entrepreneurship where we could follow our passions, create something from nothing and pave new roads.
Fast-forward two years and that is exactly what Brett was trying to do. He had graduated from college the previous December and launched Remind101. He dove into the pool of entrepreneurship headfirst. I, on the other hand, had experienced a temporary change of heart. Living the life of an entrepreneur was still in my line of sight, but I had recently discovered it was not the best move for me right out of college. I knew that I needed to gain other experiences (a job at a company, maybe an MBA) and then ease myself into the pool of entrepreneurship, toes first.
As it turned out, I picked a great person to have coffee with: that’s exactly what Tom Crawford did.
* * *
While Tom was earning an undergraduate degree at Kettering University, he worked at the William Beaumont Hospital, which gave him great insight into how a 10,000-employee business runs. He went to work with the hospital after graduation, but eventually left for a company that would help him earn his MBA. While working full-time as a business analyst for a communications company, he was also a full-time student in the University of Michigan’s nighttime MBA program. For three years, Tom endured a grueling lifestyle where work and school occupied virtually every spare moment he had.
Once he finished his MBA, Tom landed a job as a consultant for a company called Root, which created the opportunity to travel both nationally and internationally and see how different organizations operate. When his position within the company changed, he had a chance to build a new program from the ground up—essentially becoming an entrepreneur within the comforts of a large company. The program his team created was a big success, but after a few years, the role became routine and Tom moved on to a new company. As he said, “Life is too short to spend doing something you don’t enjoy.”
His next job was similar in that he had the opportunity to build something from the ground up—but, this time there was a little more risk, and the safety net wasn’t quite as big. As his career progressed, he was lucky to work on projects that allowed him to wade into the entrepreneurial pool. These experiences resulted in an opportunity to hang up the corporate suit, set his hours and be his own boss. That’s where he is today, as the CEO of Visualization Network—living life as an entrepreneur.
* * *
It is interesting to think back to Tom and Brett’s meeting at the coffee shop. It was a meeting between two people doing the same thing—running companies—and yet the paths they had taken to reach that point were completely different: Brett dove headfirst while Tom waded in slowly.
So who made the right choice? And what is the right choice for me?
The truth is that they both made the right choice. Coffee with Tom helped me realize that we each have a career path that is uniquely ours—even if the destinations are the same. The only way to find success is choosing the path that is right for you—not the path others are traveling, or the one your friends and family think you should follow. What worked for Tom wasn’t the right fit for Brett, and what worked for Brett probably isn’t going to work for me. It is reassuring to know that we are all on own journeys, and as long as I stay true to myself, I will find my right path.
* * *
As our meeting was drawing to a close, Tom asked me if I knew how to get to my next stop. It was my first time in Ann Arbor, and I didn’t have a clue, so he borrowed a piece of paper from me and proceeded to draw me a map of where I was, where I wanted to be, and the best way to get there.
As I walked out of the coffee shop to navigate the unfamiliar streets of Ann Arbor by myself, it was nice to know what path someone familiar with the area would follow. It was equally reassuring to know that I was perfectly capable of mapping a successful route on my own.
Noshir Amaria
Espresso Royale in East Lansing, Michigan
Medium brewed coffee
Don’t let obstacles and critics deter you from your path.
When my parents dropped me off at school as a freshman, my mom’s parting words were, “Now remember, don’t talk to strangers!” Of course, she didn’t mean it literally (as an out-of-state student, everyone was a stranger to me). It was her way of telling me to be careful and make smart choices.
That being said, I don’t think she was too happy to discover I was making friends with strangers on the Internet for coffee.
Noshir Amaria and I had tweeted a few times,
just quick 140-character messages about random somethings or others (a common occurrence in the perplexing world of Twitter). Everything I knew about him came from his 140-character biography: Die-hard Spartan, Athletic Trainer, Future Sports Medicine Osteopathic Physician. Nice guy & friend to all SPARTANS (Michigan State’s mascot). He was a friendly Spartan interested in MSU Athletics—a description that matches each of the 80,000 sports fans who fill Spartan Stadium each Saturday home football game.
So why have Cup 7 with Nosh? Well, when I announced the start of my 52 Cups project on Twitter, he had responded within minutes, expressing interest in being one of the 52. My first reaction was to say okay—the unpredictability of meeting a complete stranger would add to the adventure.
But when the time came to schedule a meeting, I was torn. The truth is, sometimes situations with unknown outcomes make me uncomfortable, and my natural tendency is to avoid them. The rational person inside me kept insisting I go the safe route and ask a friend to recommend someone else for Cup 7. But I had already said yes to Nosh, so I had to hold up my end of the bargain.
At 10 a.m. on a Friday, I found myself sitting across from him at Espresso Royale. After I’d unknowingly walked right past him while he was waiting for me outside (I had no idea what he looked like), he came inside to introduce himself, and we ordered coffee.
I decided to kick off the conversation with the only topic I knew we had in common: interest in MSU Athletics. What I had expected would be a topic to break the ice soon became the focal point of our conversation. He had graduated from MSU with an undergraduate degree in athletic training, worked as a trainer for four years, and was now suffering through medical school in hopes that he could ultimately land his dream job as a sports physician with the Michigan State Athletics department.
Saying that Nosh likes athletic training is an understatement. He glowed when he talked about it, and the conviction in his voice could stop one of the 300-pound offensive tackles he used to tape ankles for before football games. However, achieving a big dream takes much more than just passion, and Nosh was quick to make that point. It takes focus and determination to overcome the obstacles and distractions that undoubtedly get between the dream and the reality. Luckily, Nosh has that too; he’d made up his mind and won’t let anyone—or anything—stand in his way.
It had not been easy. Nosh wasn’t accepted to medical school the first time he applied. When his second attempt was successful, he was forced to turn down attractive job offers in exchange for the grind of medical school. Some of his professors told him he would never survive school, he failed big exams, and some of his friends listed reason after reason for why he wasn’t making the right choice. He even battled his self-doubt during especially difficult times. But, through all of this, he had endured.
He gave some credit to his family. “You have to have people in your life,” he told me, “to support you when you can’t stand on your own.” But ultimately, it had been his burning passion and steadfast resolve to succeed that kept him going: “My mom said that of all the things I’ve ever learned, how to quit is not one of them.” The hard work paid off, as Nosh was preparing to graduate from medical school later that spring.
* * *
I figured my days of receiving advice from athletic trainers ended the day I left the cross-country team to pursue other interests. But there I was at Espresso Royale, learning something far more important than how to get rid of a blister or ease an aching muscle.
Unlike myself and many of my peers who have no idea what we are going to do with our lives, Nosh is still focused like a laser on what he wants to do. He maintains that focus even when the road is difficult. There are easier paths he could have traveled, yet he picked one full of potholes and tight turns. Why? He ignored what his critics said and listened to what his heart told him.
After my cup of coffee with Nosh, I wasn’t a single step closer to knowing what my dream career will be; thanks to him, though, I know what it will look like when I find it. Until I can sit in a coffee shop for two hours, glowing with excitement as I talk about what my future holds, I need to keep searching. Nosh is a prime example of what it means to pour your heart into something. We see athletes do this all the time: those iconic moments when players, with all odds stacked against them, go out onto the field or court and give all they have to succeed at what they love. In life, these moments can be hard to find. All too often, the noise of the crowd muffles what our hearts are saying.
I am no exception. I couldn’t help but wonder if the reason I couldn’t figure out my future is because I didn’t have the courage to shut out the well-intentioned noise from people I love and respect and just listen to my heart. Or maybe it was fear of the difficult roads I would have to travel to reach my goals. But the truth is, any path will be full of hardship; that is just the way life goes, and the surest way to overcome those obstacles is to have a burning passion for the dreams that wait on the other side of persistence.
My mom told me not to talk to strangers, but that didn’t stop me from sitting down for coffee with one and learning valuable insights. I guess you could say the decision to follow my heart and step outside my comfort zone paid off.
Barbara Burnham
Little Daddy’s Family Restaurant outside Detroit, Michigan
Bottomless cup of freshly brewed coffee
Life rarely goes according to plan; just keep growing.
Barbara Burnham’s life was right on track: she had graduated from college, found a job, married her college sweetheart, had babies, and achieved her goal of being a stay-at-home mom. For as long as she could remember, that was exactly the life she wanted.
The Barbara I sat down to coffee with at Little Daddy’s Family Restaurant outside of Detroit is much more than just a wife and mother. She has become a licensed builder, renovation consultant, designer, and now an emerging entrepreneur with no plans to stop working anytime soon.
The life she has created differs greatly from the life she had planned. What happened? Well, as John Lennon said: Life is what happens to you when you’re busy making other plans.
Barbara is 5’8” with short blonde hair, wears bronze-colored glasses, and is old enough to be a grandma—because she is one. She told me all this in an email so that I would be able to find her at the restaurant. If she hadn’t let me know, I would never have guessed Barbara’s age. She has the exuberance and spirit of a woman who is eternally young at heart. I liked her immediately and was grateful our mutual friend suggested we meet.
* * *
We sat down at a table and placed our orders. Then we jumped into the conversation.
Barbara had loved her role as a mother; however, she knew something was missing. Her artistic talents weren’t being used, so she found a landscape-design job she could do from home; each night, after she had put the kids to bed, she worked until 2 a.m. completing her assigned project. It was a challenge to juggle, but it gave her the creative outlet she needed.
When her children entered elementary school, she found a job where she could be back home before they came home from school. She worked for a builder who recognized her talents and encouraged her to get her builder’s license. She studied for the exam, passed it, and advanced into a new career opportunity.
A few years later, she started doing small renovation projects for friends: kitchens, bathrooms, etc. One day, she had been looking at her finances and realized that when she worked for the contractor she kept only 20% of the profits. But if she worked for herself—doing the same thing—she could keep 100% of the profits. That was when she decided it was time to take the plunge and start a design-consulting firm.
After 13 years in that role, she saw another opportunity. For her sister’s 60th birthday, Barbara had made a beautiful piece of artwork out of relief tiles with the logo of her sister’s alma mater. The piece, which now hung in her sister’s house, received endless compliments from friends. The gift had made Barbara realize the potential for college-themed tiles.
With her years of experience working with tiles, she knew she had found a business opportunity that was perfect for her.
The process of becoming an entrepreneur was once again difficult. Barbara had to teach herself new things, take risks, go outside her comfort zone, and deal with the mistakes every entrepreneur experiences at one point or another. Amidst the challenges, the process had come along with big rewards.
As Barbara told me stories of her past, I realized her method: she followed a simple pattern repeatedly. She would make a plan and follow it, but when something felt out of place, or she recognized a new opportunity, Barbara made a change. She stepped out of her comfort zone to try something new. This action caused her to learn, to grow, and ultimately to gain experience and confidence, which she could then leverage into a new opportunity and restructure her plan.
Throughout her life—as in everyone’s life, for that matter—she experienced two types of change: internal and external. Barbara’s husband had a job that required them to move to places they hadn’t planned (external). Barbara realized she needed a job in addition to being a stay-at-home mom (internal). With her mindset, she could cope with both types of change.
* * *
There are two ways to respond to unexpected change: let the change control you, or take control of the change. Barbara chooses the latter. She listens to her heart and works hard in whatever situation life throws her way. As a result, she is now doing a job for which she is passionate and has a wonderful family and fulfilling life. She knows she has much more to accomplish in her career, but she is on the right path. Hers is a constant journey, with no concrete destination.
52 Cups of Coffee: Inspiring and insightful stories for navigating life’s uncertainties Page 3
