Restless Rancher

by Jennifer Ryan

  Sonya shook her head all through that guilt-ridden statement. “Roxy knows what it’s like to live in a place that’s unhealthy and makes you feel as sad as the place looks.”

  “You do, too, don’t you?”

  “Roxy and I have a lot in common.” She glanced around the dismal room. “Roxy has the means to give you a hand up. Take it. And when you have the chance to do it for someone else, do it.”

  “Are you always this serious?”

  “Yes.” Cautious. Steady. Boring. Her sisters constantly tried to get her to loosen up. “Now get back to work.” She cocked her head toward one of the guys in the other room. “Looks like they found another buried treasure.”

  Austin turned and stared at the sterling silver box, tarnished by time. “My grandmother used to keep the jewelry case on the dresser in her room.”

  “Looks like your grandfather hid it in an old apple crate filled with dish towels.”

  “Where else would one keep it?”

  She liked the sarcasm far better than his earlier anger and frustration over what his grandfather had done to the house and his memories. “I found a Cheerios box filled with ketchup packets.”

  “I guess you have to store them somewhere,” he quipped.

  “He stuffed it behind a paper bag filled with other folded paper bags.”

  Austin shook his head and rolled his eyes. “Trying to figure him out makes my head hurt.”

  “I’m pretty sure that’s the massive hangover.”

  He frowned, but nodded his reluctant agreement. “There won’t be any more of those.”

  If he said so.

  “We’re making progress. Keep at it.” Just like every other daunting task in her life, that’s all she could do. One step at a time until the job was done. But like every other time, in the back of her mind, she wondered what happened next. Where was her life headed? With every achievement, was she moving closer to what she really wanted?

  Or simply going through the motions because she didn’t really know where she fit or belonged.

  Chapter Six

  Austin woke at the crack of dawn. During the winter, sleeping in the barn had made his bones ache in the freezing cold, but now the Montana days grew warmer with spring taking hold.

  After working all day yesterday, his whole body rebelled against the slightest movement. His muscles clenched every time he even thought about getting up. He didn’t know how many times he’d dragged the large trash cans out to the Dumpsters yesterday, but it was enough to tell him he was getting old and soft. If nothing else, all this hard labor would get him ready for the ranch work ahead.

  Before he let his mind spin out on everything he needed to do to bring animals onto the ranch, he focused on what needed to be done today. He and the guys Sonya hired had cleared the main living space. It shamed him to let anyone see the place in such dire conditions. But what they did in one day would have taken him two weeks or more on his own.

  He turned his head and stared at the piles of stuff on the tarps out in the yard. At first, he’d wanted to keep every little thing. A lot of the stuff had barely been used, if ever.

  He found a vacuum cleaner in the box. Why? There wasn’t a square inch of floor you could use it on. Until now. He found other cleaning supplies and flattened boxes. Signs his grandfather had at least wanted to try to clean out the house, but like Austin, he had probably taken one look at the mess, gotten overwhelmed, and simply ignored it rather than do the hard work.

  Austin had spent too long putting things off for later.

  He’d put his whole life off for later.

  Not anymore.

  His muscles still protested, but he rolled up and turned to sit on his uncomfortable and too-small cot. Across the yard and next to her truck, Sonya stood on a mat in tight black pants and a pink long-sleeve T, her arms stretched up to the sky. She bent at the waist and planted her hands on the mat, her sweet round ass pointed right at him.

  Damn. He’d spent most of yesterday trying not to notice the beautiful dictator. From the minute she arrived, she’d been in charge, telling him where to start, what to do, when to take a break, when to eat, when to quit for the day. She set up all the workers and contractors. She made the decisions for the updates to the house. He’d gone along for the ride because he’d been too hungover to think let alone keep up with her.

  Today would be a different story. He didn’t need her to get the place in order. He could oversee the workers. She was supposed to write the checks and make sure he didn’t squander Roxy’s money. He wished she’d stick to that and stay out of his way. Because she was a distraction he didn’t need or want.

  His aching morning wood didn’t heed his wishes. It wanted to nudge itself right past her round bottom and bury itself deep inside her.

  But that would end in disaster.

  She was Roxy’s sister. The last thing he wanted to do was give Roxy any reason to back out of their deal.

  Besides, he didn’t have the money to take her out on a proper date and still fill the gas tank in his truck.

  So he’d kept his head down yesterday and tried to keep up with the guys helping out.

  Didn’t mean he didn’t notice Sonya’s boundless determination, her strength, and the way she defused his anger and frustration when it came to this place and how he’d let down his grandfather. The woman didn’t bat an eye at the mess, the roaches scurrying from one hidey hole to the next, or the rodents squeaking their displeasure at having their homes disturbed. She voiced her opinion about the atrocious smell, but never demurred when it came to cleaning unidentifiable grunge and droppings.

  He’d had a moment when he stood in the middle of all that filth and disarray and thought he should just get a bulldozer and level the place. But with every memory he uncovered—the rocking chair his grandmother read him stories in, the paint-by-numbers floral painting his mother did in high school that hung proudly over the fireplace, cans of his favorite Hershey’s hot cocoa he used to sip by the fire while playing cards with his grandpa—he wanted to return the house to what it was for him: a home where he’d been safe and loved. Where he’d been enough.

  Sonya moved into a deep lunge, arms overhead, then falling sideways as she stretched. Maybe he should join her and loosen up, though he doubted anything would untie the knot in his gut that pulled taut every time he looked at her. He tried not to look into her eyes. Every time he did, he saw something deep inside her. A longing and wanting.

  Not the way he wanted her in his bed. It had been a long time since he’d satisfied the itch she exacerbated with every graceful move she made as she worked out in the soft morning light. No, she wanted something deep and meaningful.

  How did he know that? He’d seen the way she looked at the house and talked about how his grandfather buried his memories. A life he’d lost with the death of his wife and daughter.

  Austin felt their loss keenly. Yes, he’d lost his mother, but did that kind of pain even come close to losing a beloved wife and child? The ache in his chest had intensified with every recollection of the good times he’d had here with his family.

  Granddad must have found the memories unbearable to have buried them deep in the chaos he’d created in the house.

  Unwanted and unloved by his own father, Austin finally understood why he’d been drinking himself into oblivion. He missed his mother, his grandparents, and the love they’d given him unconditionally and wholeheartedly.

  Their loss had hit him harder and more profoundly than his father firing him from the business and disowning him. At the time he’d thought Kelly would stick by his side. She didn’t get his connection to this place. She said he loved it more than he loved her. Well, he’d kept the land and let her go. If she didn’t get it, he didn’t need her.

  That’s what he told himself.

  But the long lonely nights always made him second-guess himself.

  After what Kelly did the other day, he had no doubts he’d made the right choice. Her deceitfulne
ss and calculation cut deep and showed him just how little she cared. Who could do something so despicable to someone they claimed to love?

  Sonya rolled up her mat, set it in the truck bed next to the inflatable mattress where she’d slept last night, picked up a toiletry bag, and headed for the back door.

  He stood and stretched his back. His foot knocked over a beer bottle that toppled two more. Sonya stopped and stared over at him. She didn’t show any outward sign of disapproval, but he felt it all the same.

  She thought him nothing better than a drunk. Well, she’d had the barbecue and beer delivered last night for him and the crew, though three beers was nothing compared to what he’d been drinking lately.

  He didn’t need to forget and numb his body and mind anymore. He had things to do, a business to start. He deserved a couple of cold beers at the end of a twelve-hour day.

  She didn’t know anything about him and what he’d been through.

  I’m arguing with myself.

  Fuck.

  He didn’t care what she thought.

  To prove it, he grabbed his stuff and headed for the kitchen. They’d left the doors and windows open to air the place out last night. It only smelled half as bad as it did yesterday. They didn’t need the masks in the kitchen. The bedrooms they needed to clear today remained to be seen.

  Sonya stood at the sink brushing her teeth. He set his bag of stuff next to hers, took out his toothbrush and paste, spread some on the bristles, and started to brush. She didn’t say anything about him standing so close. She spit in the sink, turned on the water, leaned over to drink from the faucet, swished, and spit a couple of times. She left the tap on for him to do the same while she raked her fingers through her long dark hair, drew it into one hand, then used the band around her wrist to tie it up in a ponytail. She cupped her hands under the water and splashed it on her face. While droplets dripped into the sink, she squeezed some liquid soap onto her fingers, set the bottle down, lathered the soap on both hands, then scrubbed her cheeks, chin, and forehead. She rinsed, then used the small towel draped over her shoulder to dry off.

  “That stuff smells good.” Like the apricots pictured on the label. “Can I use some?”

  She handed him the bottle. While he washed his face, she spread lotion over hers and massaged it in. When he finished rinsing his face, she handed him her towel.

  “You’re quiet in the morning.”

  “I need coffee.” The pot slowly dripped on the counter in front of him. “I’m sure you do, too.”

  For some reason, that sparked his anger. “I’m not hungover. I had a few beers after a long day. Shoot me.”

  She held her hands up in front of her. “Hey, I’m not your babysitter. Do whatever the hell you want. I only meant if you’re as tired as I am, it’s going to take a lot of caffeine to get through this day. You want to get smashed, be my guest. You’re the only one who can ruin this deal. I just work here.” She grabbed her stuff and walked out, leaving him feeling like a complete asshole and still holding her towel in his fist.

  He pressed it to his big mouth, smelled her, and tossed it on the counter she’d cleaned along with two mugs. The rest of the dishes she’d salvaged from the cupboards and piles in the house were stacked and spread out on a tarp out back.

  She’d worked her ass off yesterday, fed him and everyone else, then made the coffee this morning. He had no doubt she’d work just as hard today. For him. For this place he couldn’t let go. And he’d snapped at her because he was angry at himself for the way he’d been behaving this past year, not because she’d in any way reprimanded him the way he deserved to be.

  Disappointed in himself for hiding in a bottle and treating the few people left in his life like shit, he vowed to do better and be better.

  He rinsed the mugs in the sink just to be on the safe side, then filled both with hot coffee. He carried them out the back and found Sonya standing at the lowered tailgate of her truck. He handed one mug to her.

  “Thanks.”

  “You’re welcome. And I’m sorry about snapping at you. Drinking to avoid my problems was beyond stupid. I want this project to work, and I’ll do whatever I have to do to make it happen. I don’t need a drink, I need this business to succeed, and I know that only happens if I’m on my game.”

  She stopped studying the papers in front of her and turned to him. “Keep your shit together and work harder than you did yesterday.” Sound advice. She gave no quarter. He didn’t deserve any. But her direct manner still annoyed the hell out of him. “What do you think about opening up the casing into the living room and putting in an island?”

  Back to business. “I think it will cost a lot of money I don’t have.”

  She pinched her lips. “I think it’s just what the house needs.” She picked up her phone and tapped a button. “Ask the cabinet guys to add an island to the order.”

  “How many messages did you record for yourself yesterday?”

  “It took me twenty minutes to go through them last night and write them up on my various lists.”

  He cocked his chin toward the phone. “Is that how you keep track of everything?”

  “It’s easy and convenient. I don’t have to stop what I’m doing and find a piece of paper or my notebook.” She set her phone aside. “It may take an extra day or two for the cabinet guys to do the island. I sent them the final measurements for the kitchen last night. If you need the kitchen sink for anything, I’d do it this morning because I’m tearing out the old cabinets and sink today.” She opened the lid on a plastic bin and pulled out samples. “This is the floor I chose. Wide planks to match what’s in the living room.”

  Sonya held up a white square. “I went with marble countertops. Classic. Because the floors are dark, I ordered white cabinets with brushed nickel nobs. They come in standard sizes, which is why I could get them so quickly. I’ll match the kitchen cabinets in both bathrooms with under-mount sinks and brushed nickel faucets. Roxy suggested wood-look tile on the floors.” She pulled a sample from the bin and set it on the tailgate. “She also chose the rectangular shower tiles.” Sonya showed him the light gray tile sample that had a soft texture that added depth to the pale color.

  “I knew she wanted to redo the kitchen, but both bathrooms, too. That’s going to take time and a hell of a lot of money.”

  “We talked about it and agreed that doing it all at once when the house was gutted was the best time. Once you’re working the ranch and busy with other things, you’ll never find time to do the improvements.”

  “I take it the ‘we’ you’re talking about was you and Roxy plotting and planning my life.”

  “I don’t see how redecorating is plotting and planning your life, but we did save you from picking tile and floor samples. If you want to change something, then say so.”

  “I don’t want any of this. Yes, I wanted the house cleaned out, but I don’t want to be beholden to Roxy for all this money. She said she’d help me with the ranch. Okay. Let’s focus on that.”

  “I’m sorry, Austin, but there is no way in hell Roxy is going to allow you to live like you’ve been living here. She grew up in some terrible places. She knows what it’s like to go to sleep and hope the cockroaches don’t cart you off in the middle of the night.”

  “Roxy knows? Or you know?”

  She stared into her coffee mug. “Roxy has a kind and generous heart. She wants to do this for you. It’s happening. Make my life easier and just go with it.”

  “I heard you quit your job and gave up a huge salary and a chance at a promotion.”

  “The promotion went to a coworker who did half the work and was a quarter as smart as me, but he had a couple years on me and the same equipment as the guys running the place, so despite my being the better employee, he got a job he’ll suck at and no one will do anything about it because he’s part of the boys’ club. They didn’t bat an eye when I gave my notice. But I’m still getting emails asking for help on accounts.”

&nbs
p; “I hope you told them to fuck off.”

  “If only. I might need a reference, so . . .” She shrugged and pulled more tile out of the bin. “What do you think of this for the kitchen backsplash?”

  He gave up his objection to the renovation. Apparently he couldn’t win that futile battle.

  Black, white, and light gray tiles in different sizes were held together by string or something. “I like the random pattern. The colors will go with the marble. It might be nice to have some color.”

  Sonya dipped her hand into the seemingly bottomless bin and pulled out a sheet of dark blue glass tiles. “What if we pulled out some of the black and added in the blue?”

  “I like green better. Maybe a dark and light shade added to the pattern. Green goes with everything, right?” He spread his hands out to indicate the massive fields around them. “Let’s bring the outdoors in.”

  “Green it is. Any other requests?”

  He didn’t want to add to the bill, but . . . “What about the appliances? I can live with a coffeepot and toaster oven, but an upgrade might be nice.”

  A glimmer of a smile tilted her lips. “Everything new in stainless steel. They’ll be delivered in four days. So you’ll have to rough it a few more days.”

  “I can’t believe you’ve got this all set up and ready to be done in such a short amount of time.”

  “Yeah, well, it will be a few extra days to get the bathrooms done. But once they are, you’ll be thanking me. Well, Roxy.” She put away all the samples and folded up the blueprint of the house she’d drawn up. “Sun’s up. Let’s get to work. The crew will be here in about an hour, but I’m sure you and I can make a dent in the hallway to the bedrooms.”

  “Drink your coffee first. I want to go through the donate and keep piles, see if there’s anything I want to switch.”

  “Okay. I’ll drink my coffee and sort dishes. There’s so many random items and multiples of things that I need to see if there’s actual sets of things that make sense and donate some of the extra items. I mean, how many potato peelers do you need?”