by Sara Orwig
“If Agnes is that shallow, then Zachary is better off. Love should bridge differences and different pasts.”
“Do you think so, Crystal?”
Startled, she was surprised by something in his voice that made her curious. “Yes, I do,” she said, sensing a double purpose in his question. He sounded as if he were talking about the two of them, yet that was absurd because they had no problems about their pasts and their different cultures.
As she watched him, his brown eyes darkened. Travis unbuttoned his collar and tossed it aside. He pulled his shirt over his head and reached out to draw her to him. Her pulse jumped when he leaned down and brushed her mouth lightly with his.
“I need you,” he whispered, his hands drifting over her, unfastening buttons, removing ribbons and pins, kindling a blaze deep inside her.
She ran her hands over his broad chest, marveling in his hard, strong body, aching for him, and knowing his need for her could never be any greater than her need for him.
Nights became bliss, followed by stolen afternoons when Travis rode home for an hour while Jacob napped. And the next month when Crystal reported she was still not carrying his baby, all he could feel was immense relief.
In April the days became nice enough for Travis to commence building a room onto the house and Crystal had him around more than ever. Construction was temporarily halted because of cows calving and new foals, land that needed to be tended. They had to get animals ready for market, and the reading lessons ceased because the men became so busy with spring chores. Jacob was ten months old, toddling and jabbering with new words each day. Crystal felt invigorated by spring, wanting another baby, so deeply in love with her tall husband.
It was a cool spring night when she stirred and awoke and found the bed empty beside her. She sat up and looked around the room. Moonlight bathed it, and the house was empty, save for her and Jacob, who was sleeping soundly. She slipped out of bed and pulled on her gown and wrapper and went to look outside, wondering where he was and why he was gone.
Eighteen
Crystal returned to bed, puzzled because he had never been gone during the night since he’d stopped sleeping in the barn. Or if he had, she hadn’t been aware of it.
When he came back to bed and pulled her into his arms, she wound her arms around his neck. He raised slightly to look down at her, his black hair framing his face. He was naked, his body warm, hard against the length of hers. His shaft pressed hotly against her, and she knew he desired her.
“I woke up and you were gone.”
“I couldn’t sleep and went for a walk.”
“Why—”
His mouth brushed against hers and desire flamed low within her. He brushed his lips over hers again, so light, so tantalizing, and then his tongue touched her lips. She moaned and pulled his head down, kissing him as his mouth pressed hers and his tongue went deeply into her mouth. He moved over her, and she forgot about his inability to sleep.
The next day when Travis left for work, Zachary caught up with him. “Travis, I’ve wanted to ask you something.”
“Go ahead and ask,” he said, feeling springtime in the air. The grass was greening and the winter had not been harsh enough to hurt them. Calves were dropping and it looked like it would be a good year. And Crystal was not yet with babe. He knew she was disappointed each month, but he could not keep from being enormously relieved.
“I’d like to keep working for you.”
“I’d like for you to.”
“What I want—I’ll pay for all of it because I’ve been saving my money.”
He glanced at the tall boy walking beside him. Zachary was raw-boned and gangly, but all lean strength with his hard ranch work.
“Zachary, what do you want to do?”
“I’d like to build on to my house. It’s rather small.”
“It’s damned small,” Travis remarked, wondering why Zachary suddenly wanted more room. He was rarely in the little cabin, spending his days at work and his early evening hours with them.
“I’d like to build on because I want to ask Agnes to marry me.”
Startled, Travis glanced at him. “You’re sure? You’re still young.”
“I’m real sure,” Zachary said. “I’ll be eighteen this year.”
“It’s fine with me if you build on. I’ll pay for the costs of the materials, since it’s on my land and it stays if you quit.”
“Whillikens! Thanks! That’s great.”
“You’ll have to talk to Agnes’s father.”
“I plan to. I know her mother wants her to marry someone in town, someone who has land or a business. I’ll get my own place someday, but I like working here. You pay me well, and it’s good to work with you and Turtle River. I’m learning.”
“How old is Agnes?”
“She’ll be eighteen a month after I am. That’s old enough to marry.”
“Her parents will have to approve.”
“I know they will,” Zachary said, staring solemnly ahead. He glanced at Travis. “I know I’m not much in lots of ways, but I love Agnes and I’ll be good to her. And God strike me dead if I’m ever a man like Eb North.”
“You won’t be.”
“No. I’m honest and hard-working and I love her. I hope that’s enough.”
“I wish you luck.”
“Thank you.”
“When are you going to talk to Mr. Blair?”
“I’ll go by when we’re in town Saturday and see him if I can.”
They reached the horse pen, and the bay walked to meet Travis as he entered the pen. “Thanks, Travis.”
He nodded as Zachary mounted the pinto and turned away from the barn. He watched the boy ride away and hoped he didn’t come home with a broken heart. But if he did, he was young and he would mend.
Travis thought about his own eighteenth birthday. A hell of a cry from Zachary’s. Wanted for murder. Travis turned to look at the house. The past was better left dead and buried. As much as Crystal cared for him and as close as they had become, her rigid view of the law would see only one thing—her husband the outlaw.
He mounted up, his thoughts on his brother Brett, on the past, on the future.
Two nights later Crystal woke, disturbed by a faint creak of the boards on the porch. She turned to Travis and stared at emptiness. Swiftly she grabbed up her wrapper and stepped out of bed. She saw him crossing the ground, his long stride carrying him swiftly and purposely toward the barn. If he were a man unable to sleep, why was he striding away as if he had to be somewhere in the next few minutes? And he looked as if he carried something beneath one arm.
What was worrying him that he wasn’t sleeping? Why the jaunts away from the house in the dead of night? He didn’t act like a man in the throes of worry. Nor did he seem unhappy with her. Far from it. Curiosity gnawed at her. What was Travis doing and why was he keeping it from her?
She leaned against the window and stood watching as he disappeared into the barn … and did not come out. Puzzled, she stayed at the window until her legs grew tired. Maybe he had gone there to sleep and she would stand until dawn before seeing him again. Yet she couldn’t give up and go back to bed. And she didn’t want to leave Jacob alone and go to the barn. Nor did she want to take the baby out into the night.
She pulled a chair to the window and sat, watching and waiting. Finally she returned to bed and lay awake, worrying about whatever he was concealing from her. When he stepped through the door, she watched him move around and saw his arms were empty. Whatever he had carried to the barn, he had left there.
And then he was in bed beside her, pulling her into his arms.
“Travis, where have you been?”
“Out walking,” he said, kissing her, and once again all the questions she had intended to ask were gone like smoke in the wind. The next morning she faced him over the breakfast table while Jacob still slept.
“Why aren’t you sleeping?”
His dark eyes were inscrutable. “Just restl
ess. Maybe worried about you.”
“Me? I’m fine.”
“I know, but I worry.”
She sat on his lap and slipped her arms around his neck. “Then stop worrying. I love you, Travis Black Eagle, and you’re not going to lose me.”
He gazed at her solemnly. “I hope you mean that, Crystal. I hope with all my heart you mean that,” he said so earnestly her heart missed a beat. What about his feelings for her? How deep did they run now?
She leaned forward to kiss him, a slow, wet, lingering kiss that made him tighten his arms around her and carry her back to bed.
As he dressed to go, she lay in bed watching the ripple of muscles in his back and she remembered how smooth the skin on his back was. Love for him surged in her while fears about his jaunts outside at night were a torment. Pulling on her wrapper, she crossed the room and slipped her arms around his waist.
He grinned, his teeth white against his dark skin, and she gazed up happily at her handsome husband. “What’s this? Back to bed again? Crystal, my knees are almost too weak to hold me up now, and I have more than a full day’s work ahead.”
“We’re not going back to bed. I’m just hugging you before you go. And stop worrying about me.”
His grin vanished and she saw a shuttered look in his expression that she hadn’t seen since their first months together. “Crystal, I—” He stopped, staring at her, and then he bent his head and kissed her hard.
Her heart thudded and she returned his kiss passionately, all the love she felt for him welling up in her. He had given her so much, a full, rich life, a son, joy, endless hours of loving that drove her wild, a home and a future and hope for another baby. She loved him to the depths of her soul and she wondered if he had been on the verge of declaring his love for her. And if he had, why was it so hard for him to do so?
She didn’t care. She had enough of him now. Lord knows, he acted like a man in love.
He released her. “Damn, you make me want to go right back to bed. I can’t get enough of you, woman!”
“I hope you never get enough of me,” she said.
“I’m getting out of here while I can still walk. I have to go to work.”
“You go, darlin’,” she drawled, “and just think about coming home to me.”
He inhaled, his chest expanding; and instead of giving her one of his teasing answers, he gave her a hard look and touched her chin. “Lady, that’s all I do think about.”
He left and she stood in the open door and watched him stride away, wondering why he was so tied in knots. What had he been about to say to her? One thing, the man cared for her. Maybe more than he could acknowledge, but that farewell had sounded like a man in love if she could judge by her own feelings. Her joy was tempered by an instinct that made her feel something was amiss. Something was coming between them and she couldn’t fathom why or what.
On Saturday, Travis drove her to town in the wagon to have lunch with Eloise Knudsen and her friends. Zachary rode with them to purchase his new horse and then ask Agnes’s father for her hand in marriage.
After lunch, when Crystal left the Knudsen’s and returned to the livery stable, she wondered how Zachary had fared and she was anxious to be with Travis and Jacob. Nights in Travis’s arms were magical and she was looking forward now to going home.
As she reached the livery, Zachary rode up. He wore the new black suit he had ordered and his hair was combed down and parted neatly in the center. One look at his white face, and she guessed he did not have good news.
She shaded her eyes and looked up at him.
“Mr. Blair wants us to wait a year.” Zachary’s hands were knotted on the reins, his knuckles white. “A year, Crystal! I’m in love with Agnes and I know I shall be always.” He dismounted, his face in a scowl.
“Nineteen is not an old age,” she said, disappointed, but not surprised.
“Hellfire, Crystal! Sorry. I love her and I want her to be my wife. And she loves me. She’s home crying now.”
“Zachary, if she loves you, then both of you can wait. She won’t change and love someone else. And they haven’t said no. They just asked you to give a year to waiting.”
Her pulse jumped because she could see Travis through the open door. He raised his head and smiled at her and she smiled in return.
“See, dam—sorry. See what you two have. Marriage is good. Both of you are happy.”
“Yes, we are,” she said. Travis moved away from a stall and came to meet her, handsome in a chambray shirt and denim pants that hugged his slim hips. He brushed her lips lightly with a kiss. Jacob toddled after him and he swung him up in his arms. Jacob held his arms out to her.
“Mama, hug.”
She wondered if she would ever stop thrilling to hearing Jacob call her mama. He went into her arms and hugged her, wrapping his little arms around her neck. He smelled like hay and horses, but she hugged him and was glad to be back with him. He smiled at her with a big grin that showed his tiny baby teeth.
Travis watched her and then draped his arm across her shoulders. “We’re busy today. I’ve bought two horses and sold three, so business is brisk, besides the horses brought in for me to board and the ones I need to shoe. Andy will not be back until late.”
“I can help,” Zachary said, going inside.
Travis watched him. “The boy is a help. He wants to learn everything he can. I’ll hear from him, but how did it go for him with Agnes’s father?”
“Mr. Blair wants them to wait a year.”
Travis watched her with smoldering fires in his brown eyes. “That one year will be eternity to Zachary. I don’t want to wait the rest of the day to get you home to myself,” Travis added in a husky voice, touching her collar, brushing her throat with his fingers. His hair was fastened behind his head, leaving the planes and angles of his face more stark and handsome.
Feeling a rush of longing, she leaned closer against Travis until Jacob wiggled to get down. She set him on his feet.
“I’ll walk down to the general store. I can take Jacob with me.”
As Travis nodded, she took Jacob’s hand. They set off down the street and she could feel Travis watching her. Turning, she waved, feeling a strange tingle and wondering about the long looks he had been giving her lately.
That night she came awake in bed as she heard the door close. This time she was awake instantly and turned to look at the empty bed. Once again when she looked out the window, Travis was hurrying to the barn and he had his arms full. What was he doing?
Something was incredibly wrong. Travis was slipping out every night and not sharing with her why or what he was doing.
There was only one way to find out. She could not bear to leave Jacob alone in the house. Stepping onto the cold floor, she dressed swiftly in one of her black woolen dresses and pulled on her shoes and cloak. She gathered up the sleeping baby, who didn’t wake, and wrapped him in a small blanket. Holding Jacob close, she emerged into the cold, clear night.
At the barn her pulse speeded up. She could see a light beneath the door. She stared at the thin sliver of yellow light, suddenly wondering whether she should turn and run back to the house and never discover what he was hiding from her.
Her life was good—more wonderful than she had ever dreamed possible. Travis was marvelous; their loving was ecstasy. Jacob was adorable, and the future looked promising. She had a dreadful premonition that whatever Travis was hiding, he was hiding it from her because he knew she would not like it.
Crystal stood immobile, torn between a need to know and the strong feeling that discovery might be a Pandora’s box that would destroy her marriage.
Yet she had to know. She remembered her drunken father and grandfather and how they had ruined lives. She had to know what Travis was keeping from her. She moved forward cautiously, stepping close to the doors.
Only inches from the barn door, Crystal heard Travis’s deep voice. Shocked, she stared at the door. Someone was staying in their barn. Travis was slippi
ng out at night to see the person without telling her. What were they doing? Were they planning something they didn’t want her to know about?
Puzzled, wondering about her volatile, inscrutable husband, she leaned against the door. Their voices were muffled, but it was another man and they were arguing.
Anger that he would hide something from her filled her and caution went up in smoke. Impulsively, she reached for the handle and tugged the barn door open and swept inside.
Nineteen
Shocked, Crystal halted. Travis stared at her. He was bent over a man with a roll of bandage in his hand. Seated on bales of straw, the man had a bloody wound in his side that looked dreadful. Travis had obviously been changing the dressing.
While they both stared at her, she looked into two pairs of dark-brown eyes belonging to two dark-skinned men with black hair. The other man’s hair was cut shorter and he was thicker through the shoulders, but he was as powerful as Travis and blatantly handsome. They had the same firm jaw, the same nose. She guessed instantly that this was Travis’s brother. He wore black denim pants and dusty black boots. He smiled at her, a wide, charming smile that surprised her and tempted her to smile right back. Except she was too filled with fury to smile.
“Why are you hiding in the barn?” she asked Travis.
“Oh, hell,” he said. As the two men exchanged a look, the injured one stood. He swayed and sat down.
“Crystal, I want you to meet my brother Brett. Brett, meet my wife, Judge Black Eagle.” The way Travis stated her title, she surmised the wound in his brother’s side was a gunshot or knife wound and the man was on the wrong side of the law.
Stunned, she stared at Brett, who flashed her another charming smile. “Ma’am, I am delighted to meet you.” His words were slurred, and she saw that he was in terrible shape. “Don’t be angry with my brother. I needed a little help and I’ll move on tonight. No one will ever know I passed through here.”
“You need a doctor,” she said.
“There’s no damned doctor in Cheyenne since your brother’s demise,” Travis said. “They’re trying to get a doctor, but in the meantime, there isn’t one except for Doc Chaney, the vet.”
