by Judy Mills
"Focus. Don't touch anything."
"The key is feeling. And trust," he added.
I opened my eyes. "Game over." Trust in general was a bit of an issue for me. Trusting feelings was even worse.
"Emotions are a higher vibration than physical matter. When you trust them, they work for you." Cooper leaned over and poked me lightly in the center of my chest. "That's the energy that expands out into your cells, moving them into the fourth dimension. Your thoughts then direct how you re-form in this dimension."
I got up. "I'm done."
Cooper grabbed my wrists and pulled me back down. I squirmed a bit on general principle, and he planted his palms on top of my shoulders to hold me still. The heat from his hands soaked into me, soothing my tension. I was being a jerk. He hadn't asked to do this, I had.
"I'll try," I muttered, crossing my legs again and taking a deep breath.
"Trust the process. Feel." He gently touched the middle of my chest with the tip of his index finger. "Picture the form you've bonded with—" he touched my forehead, "—and your body will do the rest. Let's try it."
"You are so going to fail."
* * *
Marc had been concerned, but they'd both agreed that there wasn't much they could do until something happened.
Something was happening.
On the far side of the garden, Margaret slid further down the angled roof of the ridiculous replica of a Greek temple. Through the binoculars, she watched as two black vans pulled up in the street outside the front gate, headlights off. A dozen FBI agents in S.W.A.T. gear poured out, armed and ready for a battle.
A sleek, stealth helicopter swept toward them from over the tree tops in the forest beyond, eerily silent.
She radioed Marc. They had half the men as the FBI, civilians to protect, and the Prince deep in the woods doing goddess knew what. There wasn't much chance this battle would go well for their side.
Her smile peeled back from her teeth and a primitive joy coursed through her blood.
A lost cause...the best kind of fight.
* * *
Cooper and I had been breathing and focusing for what felt like forever. Was something supposed to happen?
I cracked my eyes open and stole a peek at Cooper. His body was glowing. I glanced down at mine. Nothing.
I closed my eyes and tried harder. Sadly, my thoughts were fragmenting from boredom and frustration. I never had liked to fail and tended to think about other things when I did.
"You should feel a tingling pulse in every cell of your body," Cooper said in a calm, dreamy voice.
I gave up and watched him. "Won't shifting destroy our clothes?"
He released a long-suffering sigh and opened his eyes. "Yes. But only if you do it. Try again."
I did, but I was losing hope. I mean, Cooper had spent his life around this stuff, had grown up expecting to do it someday. For me it was all brand new and a large part of me wasn't even convinced I was made for it.
"I'm not sure this is really me," I muttered.
"I am."
There must be something I wasn't getting. Some important detail that was so normal for him he hadn't thought to mention it. "What about the ground?" I asked. "Won't we dissolve that when we shift?"
"If your change is too slow, a shallow indention will be left. Humans used to call them faery circles. Normally that doesn't happen. The life force of the Earth interacts with other dimensions all the time. She can handle it."
"Maybe Laswell was lying to me."
"This is going to take a while, isn't it," he stated.
"Feel. Picture. Trust. I know. He could have been."
"That doesn't explain your list of unusual talents."
"Like how I can smell when someone's popped in or out of the fourth D?"
"Not anyone, any time. Only when they don't belong here. And yeah, that one's unusual. Also the humanly impossible jumps, strength, injury repair..."
"I get it. But I'm still adjusting." I took a deep breath and let it out. "I miss Wizard. Not sure how I feel about the tail, though."
A tingle started in the center of my body and spread out, flickering along my arms and legs, moving over my face. It felt nice. Maybe I was finally starting to relax.
"Focus on your heart energy and let it build. You won't have very good control at first, but it'll be worse if you don't get these basic skills down."
The tingling got stronger like a light buzz of electricity was moving through my body. I wondered if my father would have been the one to guide me when it was time.
"Now picture Wizard," Cooper said, sounding so far away, so unimportant. "The texture of her fur. The weight of her in your arms—"
The image of a man's face flashed across my mind and was gone. If my life had been different, my father would have probably been the one teaching me this. A shadow of sorrow settled over my heart.
A gunshot blasted from the direction of the house.
Fear and shock erupted through my body and my heart nearly jumped out of my chest. The tingling shattered over me—a hot, piercing jolt of electricity.
I felt Cooper jump to his feet as the energy raced through my body, tangling with waves of power. My thoughts went numb and my world exploded into light.
* * *
Cooper watched in alarm as Addison's body burst into pure energy and expanded, stretching up about eight feet. He'd never seen anything like it.
Inhuman arms sprouted and then reptilian like legs, wings and a monstrous head. A blurry and vague form made out of light.
He instinctively reached for his gun, grateful it wasn't there for once. This was Addison. His Addison. Whatever the hell she was shifting into.
Another shot echoed some distance away, but now on the grounds. Whoever they were, they were getting closer.
As her form solidified, he back-peddled away from her, unable to completely stop the fear bristling down his back. What she was becoming wasn't possible.
"Change back!" he yelled, panic sweeping away his common sense. If anyone saw her, if anyone found out, they would kill her. Once a shift was this far along, it was nearly impossible for an experienced Were to reverse. No beginner could ever accomplish it.
A sharp clap of sound like a cosmic doorway shutting burst over him. The light-made creature was gone. In its place a biped eight foot gargoyle-like creature with claws, teeth, bat wings, the works—plus green cat eyes, a ruff of soft white fur around its neck and a fluffy tricolored tail.
A tingle of shift energy swept over him and he tamped it down. He would not let fear control him. This was Addison. Horrifying, dangerous, but also confused and frightened. And somehow she'd blended her cat totem with something that shouldn't even exist.
He dared to take a step closer, though it made his hackles rise. "You have to change back, Addison," he growled at her.
The creature...Addison tried to speak but only a garbled tangle of grunts and hissing came out. Its reptilian monster face contorted into a frightening parody of a puzzled look.
"You can't be seen like this. You can't even exist."
The demon-like monster—damn it, this was Addison!—cocked its head.
"For once do what you're told," he scolded, his fear and frustration boiling over into panic.
She flapped her wings in agitation, stirring up dust and leaves.
"They'll kill you!"
Understanding finally dawned and with it a shimmer of fear flickered across her strange cat-like eyes.
She nodded her head and closed those eyes. A glow blossomed out from the center of her chest and wrapped around her body as gunfire rattled through the dark forest.
* * *
I felt like I stood inside a silent, glowing egg made of light, half in and half out of the place I saw briefly before I landed in a body I didn't understand but had felt strangely at home in. I could see Cooper gesturing at me to stay where I was, or maybe to move—I wasn't sure. I could see the panic on his beautiful face as FBI agents dressed
completely in black and holding wicked looking rifles rushed at him from the forest around the clearing.
A faint brush of fear feathered across my mind, but not enough to interrupt the peace and comfort of my light-made egg. As if in slow motion, I watched Cooper duck, strike, and disarm one of the agents. I saw him run for cover, firing randomly to cover his escape.
Dispassionately, I noticed the agent across the clearing as he took careful aim and fired. I saw the bullet strike Cooper, followed by another.
I saw him go down.
* * *
The fiery, screeching pain of the bullets tore through Cooper's shoulder and thigh as the team of special agents swarmed him.
The burn didn't stop, bubbling his flesh from the inside as the moonseed coating them reacted with his blood, weakening him. He fought anyway, doing his best to dodge the PRC they were trying to get on him, though his real purpose was to keep them from focusing on anything but him.
As the collar snapped around his neck and the suppression of his DNA calmed the allergic reaction to the herb, he risked a glance toward Addison.
The clearing was empty.
Relief flooded him, momentarily carrying away the pain radiating out from his shattered shoulder and torn leg. She was safe, and that was all that mattered.
* * *
The buzz of energy racing through me was weakening and I struggled to hold it as I watched the agents haul Cooper to his feet and drag him away.
Fear rippled through the light around me when a few of them straggled behind, peering past and through me as if expecting reinforcements to burst out of the woods.
A couple gunshots off to the right inspired them to dash off, and the clearing grew quiet. Nausea rolled through my gut.
The light around me flashed, blinding me. A clap of sound hit me full force, pounding my organs to mush. Sounds, smells and feelings rushed in on me and I staggered, almost going to my knees as the fear and horror poured into me.
I was a monster.
I'd seen it on Cooper's face. I'd felt it in my body.
The cold wind hit my skin like a whip. Vulnerable and terrified, I turned and ran.
CHAPTER TWELVE
I crouched high up in the fork of a large tree, shivering. The weather had turned its attention toward autumn, putting a bite in the air. Dawn lightened the sky, casting it in watered-down shades of purple and peach. In the distance, Laswell's mansion sat dark and silent.
I was a fool to have listened to the practitioner. I should have left well enough alone. Human was what I'd always been. Human was what I should have stayed.
I'd hidden in the tree all night, nothing but a coward. I couldn't face what had happened. I couldn't even make myself find out if the others were alive or dead.
I choked back a sob, surprised I had any tears left. If Falcon was alive, he'd probably been arrested. They'd find out there was no Uncle Ben. He and Chiwa would be shipped out to an orphanage or foster home. He'd lose the store. Cooper would be brought up on charges of treason, then handed over to his Clan for disposal, and I...
I was a nightmare.
My stomach wrenched and threatened to heave, but there was nothing left to throw up. I'd emptied it long ago in the woods.
Clear and painful, the memory of Cooper's face, pale with shock and repulsion, flashed into my mind. The fear I'd seen in his beautiful eyes...it would haunt me forever.
Below me, Agent Stillman melted from the shadows a few yards away. I wasn't surprised that she'd survived. Had she even fought? Or had she let them in?
She approached the tree and looked up—straight at my bare butt as if the thick leaves around me were invisible. "Nice view," she said, a note of amusement in her voice that pissed me off.
"Why didn't you protect him?" I growled, angry that my legs had gone numb and I couldn't jump down and kill her with my bare hands. "Wasn't that your job?"
"No."
"Protecting Laswell came first, is that it?" I snapped.
"There's nothing we could have done. We're no use to him dead."
"Screw you."
"It's up to the three of us now."
"Marc?"
She nodded.
I scowled down at her. "Why should I trust you?"
"If I wanted to kill you, I had a lot of time to do it. I've been watching your back all night."
I swallowed against my suddenly dry throat. I hadn't even noticed. This was why I hated feelings. They made you vulnerable in every conceivable way.
"When I saw your Were form, I drew the agents away." Stillman pinned me with her yellow wolf eyes, her gaze hard. "No one can know what you are. It's too dangerous."
Fear of the terrible, uncontrollable power I'd felt shook through me as the memories of being in that body crashed in, squeezing down on my chest like an icy, unforgiving fist. I pressed my hands to my stomach and all of my misery spilled out of me in a torrent that I couldn't control. "I thought of my father," I whispered. "How he would have been there. Teaching me. Then something hit me in the chest and.... I didn't want it. I didn't mean for it to happen."
I pulled in a harsh breath, fighting to bring myself back from this suffocating self pity. This wasn't me. I was tough. Hard. I endured no matter what.
With an effort of will, I pushed past the pain, forcing myself to leave behind what had happened and to focus on the terrors of the present. "Who's left?" I choked out.
"Marc's watching the building where they took Cooper. Laswell and his sister were questioned, but not arrested. We sent the boy home."
A giddy relief washed over me and I almost fell out of the tree. Falcon was safe. Thank, God. But my joy didn't last.
"Cooper was always the target," Stillman said, her expression grim. "We think the vampire called in our location."
My anguish burst free and I fought to keep it from pulling me under. "So it was Danny, not you. I should have known."
"Apology accepted." She held out a bundle of clothes and my holstered gun. "Now are you going to play tree nymph and pout, or are you going to help us figure out what to do?"
I stared at the weapon. How could I ever make this right?
With a flash of understanding, my pity party came to a screeching halt.
* * *
"What if the vampire doesn't know where they've taken him? Or more likely, won't tell you," Stillman asked.
I couldn't do anything until dark, so I'd gone back to safe house fifty-three to eat, sleep and prepare for the confrontation ahead of me. When I woke up, I'd found Stillman on the stairs and Marc on the roof. My own personal guards. Yippee.
"We're out of options," Marc said. "Her idea's worth a shot."
"Bellmonte prides himself on knowing everything. I'll get it out of him." I checked the size and location of the pockets on the para vest Stillman had brought for me.
The vest was specially designed to withstand clawing, biting and bullets, but was surprisingly lightweight. The material was some kind of synthetic leather with a thin layer of what felt like flexible metal sewn into the lining. It felt like Christmas.
"She can't go in without backup," Stillman said, her yellow eyes taking on a threatening gleam.
An amused smile flickered over Marc's mouth. "She isn't."
"I said, no." I held his gaze. I didn't have time to mess with their pushy alpha crap. Cooper had been gone almost twenty-four hours. Whoever had him hadn't been playing patty cake and serving him tea this whole time. "Laswell and his sister need protection. So does Falcon."
"I have my orders," Stillman growled.
"And I told you that I don't need your protection. I don't care what Cooper's instructions were. I can't focus on what has to be done unless I know the others are safe."
"From Bellmonte?" Marc asked.
I stuffed Falcon's gadgets that I'd adopted into the pockets of the black cargo pants I wore. "From any number of directions." I stopped fussing with the equipment and looked at them, worry, anger and cold determination hardening in my hear
t.
"Marc said that someone inside the FBI must have allowed Cooper to be illegally moved. We're playing outside the box now. That's my world. We do this my way."
"Except for the backup," Marc said.
Argh. Stubborn sonofa— "Fine. After I see what I can find out from Bellmonte."
Marc grinned at me, a feral touch of crazy behind the flash of teeth against his deeply tanned skin. "Deal."
* * *
Getting into Bellmonte's penthouse was easier than I expected. I hadn't even needed a pizza box.
A nice trench coat over my clothes, some makeup, a bit of fluff to the hair and a vapid gaze was all the disguise I needed. Abracadabra, just another idiotic moron who wanted the big shot vamp to bite me.
The concierge hadn't even asked my name. He'd brought me up, let me into the penthouse, and made tracks. I'd ditched the trench coat, scrubbed off as much of the makeup as I could and waited for Lord Donkey's Butt to finish with his shower.
The look on his face when he emerged immaculate and ready for work only to find my gun pointed at him, had been an extra bonus. I think I'd actually surprised the old bat.
"You should wear makeup more often." He leisurely picked up the snifter of brandy he'd left on his elaborate antique dresser and sauntered into the living room. "It brings out your eyes."
"Sit," I ordered.
Bellmonte settled into one of his million dollar chairs and watched me, a sharply curious edge to his gaze. "Attempt to kill me, or don't. I have a board meeting in twenty minutes."
"Tell me what you know."
"Child, we would be here until you died of old age if I were to do that." He took a sip of brandy. "Care to be more specific?"
"Why did Danny betray Cooper?"
"I would be more interested to know who claims that he did."
"He was the only one who knew."
"Certainly an exaggeration," Bellmonte said, his tone drifting toward lazy. His piercing gaze moved over me like he was taking my measurements.
