Mr. King kicked some shell around for a few moments. "What was it that judge said?" he muttered to himself. "Oh yes. His strength is as the strength of ten because his heart is pure. Yeah, his heart is pure and his head is empty, and I don't know how you can beat that combination." He stopped muttering to himself, and said, "Take the bulldozer. Call your father and I'll give him a lift. What do I care?"
He turned and stomped back to his jeep, and I called Pop and sent him after Mr. King for the lift to Gulf City.
It was a real handy thing to have that bulldozer around. The feller running it helped me yank out a couple pilings where our shack had stood, and we used them for rollers, and in a couple hours had our place back where it wouldn't take nothing but jacks to lift it up again and put it on pilings. After the bulldozer left, Holly and me fixed dinner and set around feeling good.
Holly said, "I don't suppose your Pop will get back tonight."
"No," I said, "he was fixing to stay in town, and come back tomorrow."
"Then we have the place to ourselves, don't we?"
"Well, yes, if you want to look at it that way."
"I do want to look at it that way."
"I reckon that is all right if you got nothing better to look at."
"Toby," she said, "this is sort of like being married and alone together in our own place, isn't it?"
"It is real restful if that is what you mean."
"Oh, you make me tired!" she said, and got up and went in the shack.
Well, it didn't make much sense for her to be feeling rested at one moment and tired the next, but there warn't nothing I could do about it. I set there watching the moon come up, and in a while Holly come back out. She had put on her high heels and a right pretty dress that buttoned down the front and nipped in at her waist.
"You look real nice," I said. "It is too bad there is nobody around to see."
She leaned against the doorway and wriggled a little against it like a cat scratching its back. Then she said, "You haven't kissed me since that night on the bridge when I gave you that lesson on looking out for yourself with girls."
"That was a right good lesson," I said. "I bet it will come in handy when I run up against a girl."
She said in a funny tone, "Isn't it lucky I'm not a girl."
"Well," I said, "you are getting kind of close to it. That night on the bridge I thought you was one for sure. But afterward I seen I was wrong." "Are you sure that lesson of mine didn't come in handy with Miss Claypoole? When you were talking to the judge the day before yesterday, you said something about how embarrassed you got, the time Miss Claypoole gave you one of those word-association tests."
"Maybe it come in a little handy that time."
"What happened that day, Toby?"
"Oh, nothing much. After she give me the test, we was setting on the blanket and pillows—"
"Pillows!"
"Pillows are right comfortable when you are setting on the sand."
"Just a moment," Holly said. She went into the shack, and come out bringing a blanket and a couple of pillows. "Let's sit here on the porch floor, and you show me how everything was arranged," she said.
"I am not sure this is a good idea."
"Toby, if you don't show me just what happened, I'll think that the worst possible things happened. You don't want me to worry myself sick, do you?"
"Couldn't you take my say-so for it?"
"I'd rather see exactly what happened."
Well, I knowed she didn't really mean that, because she didn't know that some bothersome things had happened, but I figured I could show her a couple of little things and that would take care of her worries. So I spread out the blanket and fixed the pillows and we set down.
"How it all started," I said, "was Miss Claypoole said I must be tired after the test, and why didn't I lay back and rest. So I done that. Like this, see?" I laid back with my head on one of the pillows. It was real comfortable, and I gave a yawn and said, "I could near about go to sleep."
"Toby, you never got away with taking a nap that day."
"Well, no. I was thinking of right now."
"Just show me what happened and don't change the subject."
"Well, Miss Claypoole run her hand over my forehead to help me relax after that there test."
"Like this?" Holly said, reaching out a hand and stroking my face.
"You have got it down pretty good," I said. "Only it has to be real soft and not so much like you are ironing shirts for the twins . . . yes ma'am, that's much better."
"Then what did she do?"
"She said she would relax too, and she undid her hair and said I could run my hand through it if I liked."
"Oh," Holly said. "Now I begin to see how you go about this." She undid her hair and shook it loose around her face, and leaned over me. "Do you like me this way, Toby?" she said.
"However did you figure that out?" I said. "Holly, them is just the words she used."
"I don't think she invented them. Is my hair as nice as hers?"
I reached up and run my hand through it. Her hair was soft and felt all tingly against my fingers. The moonlight come through her hair and made her face real pale and pretty, like one of them lilies floating in a cedar water pool. "I reckon I like your hair better," I said. "Yours is smoother and don't get tangled in my fingers like hers done, which was why Miss Claypoole's face and mine kind of got pulled together when I combed my fingers through her hair."
"Oh dear," Holly said. "You just hit a tangled place."
I didn't feel no tangle but of course it warn't my hair getting pulled, so Holly knowed better than I did what was happening, and all of a sudden our faces was right together and I had to admit we was kissing each other.
After a minute Holly lifted her head and give me a queer look and said, "Toby Kwimper, what were you doing with the top button on my dress?"
"I was undoing it. I kind of forgot where I was."
"You thought you were with Miss Claypoole, didn't you?"
"Well, yes and no. That time with Miss Claypoole I didn't want to undo the button on her shirt, and this time I got to admit I did want to. So I'll just say I am sorry and maybe we better set up on chairs and stop this."
"No, Toby, I have to find out what happened or I'll never stop worrying. What happened?"
"Well, the top button on her shirt come undone by itself, and her fingers was stiff from taking notes so she couldn't fix it, and she asked me to button it for her. I meant to button it, but my fingers went off on their own and done the wrong thing."
"Like they're doing now, Toby?"
By that time a couple more buttons on Holly's dress had come undone. I got a little bit dizzy and my chest was starting to feel like I had been swimming under water two-three minutes, and I said, "Holly, you don't have nothing on under the top of your dress."
"She didn't either," Holly said. "Don't forget I saw her, before you went off with her that day."
"Holly," I said, and my voice sounded real weak, "you have growed more than I thought."
"How many more of her buttons did you undo, Toby?"
"Honest, I didn't undo no more. I was starting to get pretty bothered about that time, near about as bothered as I am getting now, and things got real mixed up. I was trying to get my hands away from where they might get in more trouble, and it seemed like Miss Claypoole was counting the ribs under my shirt and I couldn't talk real good on account of our faces was close together and I pulled her arms down to her side and—Holly, how can I keep telling you what happened when you keep doing all them things!"
"I'm just trying to help you remember," she said, snuggling close up against me.
"Holly there warn't a thing more that happened, on account of this is where I reached four times six is twenty- four, and got myself untangled and went for a swim."
"Good for you," Holly said, snugghng closer.
"But this is where I need to go for a swim, Holly. I mean right now."
"What would have happened if you had
n't gone for a swim?"
"I'd ruther not think of that," I said.
But it didn't do no good to say I'd ruther not think of it because I was thinking of it. And on top of that I never had managed to pin Holly's arms at her sides like I had done with Miss Claypoole. I am sorry to say I warn't trying very hard, either, and there is times when a person's hands just don't pay no mind to what you tell them not to do. So I went to work real quick on the times table, starting from four times six where I had left off with Miss Claypoole. I got to five times five and it was helping some but things was still pretty much up in the air as to which way they would go.
"Toby Kwimper," Holly whispered, "you're doing that damn times table."
"Yes ma'am," I said. "And I am near about running out of numbers, too."
"How far are you in the times table?"
"I just done five times five."
Holly said real fast, "Five times six is thirty. Five times seven is thirty-five. Five times eight is forty."
"Holly! That is as far as I can go!"
"I know it, Toby."
I took a deep breath, hoping it would steady me some, and said, "Holly, what comes after five times eight?"
She wriggled just as close as she could get, and said in a kind of pleased way, "Me, Toby."
It turned out she was right about that.
19
THINGS started looking real good
for us after we come through the hurricane. Pop got our claim in at the County Courthouse. The Jenkinses and Browns moved back, and we helped them get fixed. Mr. Endicott at the bank lent us five hundred dollars more, and found a crew of fellers that warn't doing much one day and sent them out to get our shack up on new pilings. We took apart the big dock that Little Nick and Blackie had left, and used some of the lumber to build a little place right by the bridge where Holly could serve coffee and sandwiches, and the Key Lime pies and pecan pies that Mrs. Brown made.
By the end of November, the tourists was coming along steady and we was starting to make a hundred dollars clear every week, which was even better than we had done off the government when Pop was getting relief or Unemployment Compensation, and the twins was getting Aid to Dependent Children and I was getting Total Disability. It was more fun than getting it off the government, too.
I had done some worrying about what happened with Holly that night on the porch. I knowed it warn't nice to let things like that happen but I couldn't rightly say I
didn't want it to happen again. So I talked it over with Holly, and she said things like that was fine if the two people was married. There is times when Holly has a good head on her shoulders, and I said I didn't have nothing agin getting married as long as it was to her, and if she warn't doing anything some day maybe we could run into Gulf City and see how you went about it. Well, it turned out she didn't have much she was planning on for that day, so we went into Gulf City and got things rolling and in a few more days we was married as nice as you please. Being married worked out so good it was a wonder I hadn't thought of it before, or that Holly hadn't, for that matter.
So things was fine until the end of November, when I come up one day to Holly's little place by the bridge, bringing some fresh water for coffee. Pop and Holly was in the lunch room, talking to a feller I had seen a couple times around the County Courthouse. He was one of them fellers that always smiles at you and has a good word for everybody. The funny thing was, Pop and Holly warn't looking very happy, even though the feller looked like he was being real friendly.
"Well, well," the feller said to me. "And this is Toby Kwimper, isn't it? Happy to meet you, sir. I'm Billy Smith."
Holly said in a faint voice, "Mr. Smith is from the County Tax Collector's Office."
"Happy to meet you," I said. "And I am glad to know where you are from, on account of having seen you a couple times before."
Pop said to him, "Tell Toby what you just told us."
"Oh well," Mr. Smith said, "it's just a couple of little things. I dropped around to say how happy we are that you folks have a good legal claim on your land, and how nice it is to see folks getting along the way you folks are."
"That is real neighborly of you," I said.
"What I been telling your Pop and your good wife here was that we have a few little things to take care of. Like taxes, you know."
"Oh yes," I said. "I heard about them things. But I reckon we have not come up agin them before."
"So I understand," Mr. Smith said. "Up to recently, of course, the title to this land was up in the air. We didn't feel we could visit you to talk about tax matters because it might have been looked on as recognizing your claim. But now I'm happy to say that we do fully recognize your claim."
"That is real nice of you," I said.
"Now," Mr. Smith said, "there is the little matter of the occupational tax for this diner your good wife has here. At the moment you're under fifteen chairs, so the State and County occupational tax is only seven dollars and seventy-five cents. If you had more than fifteen chairs and less than fifty, the tax would be fifteen dollars and twenty-five cents."
"This is all new to us," I said. "But we want to do what's right, and we will bring around the seven dollars and seventy-five cents."
"Good. Tomorrow will be soon enough. We're open till five on weekdays. Now there is the occupational tax on boat rentals. I see that you have four rowboats for rent. That is four dollars and seventy-five cents per boat, plus three dollars for each person employed. Let's be friendly about this and say that you are the only one employed on the boats. The total is, I believe, twenty-two dollars."
"Well," I said, "it is not a real big lot of money, and the way things is going we will make it up by selling more bait to the fellers that fish here."
"I'm glad you brought up the subject of bait," Mr. Smith said. "Bait is handled by and through the State Fish Conservation Department, and it will be necessary for you to get a permit. It doesn't cost much. The Fish Conservation Department has a local man in Gulf City, and when you stop by my office tomorrow I'll have Iris name and address for you."
"It isn't a lot of trouble for you?"
"No, no. It's my pleasure to help. Now of course there is the Personal Property Tax. I have looked around and made an estimate, and I'll work out your tax and have a bill ready for you to pick up tomorrow."
Pop said, "Don't forget to tell him about the real estate tax."
"Oh, yes!" Mr. Smith said. "This is a fine property you folks have acquired, and we're happy for you. I'll have the Real Estate Tax bill for you tomorrow. Of course, it will only be for the last two months of this year, starting from the date when you filed your legal claim. Next year you'll qualify for the full twelve months."
Holly said, "Don't forget to tell him about the sales tax."
"Strictly speaking, it's out of my field," Mr. Smith said. "The State Sales Tax is three percent on all sales, including food, collected from the customer and sent to the State Comptroller. I'm afraid that you folks will have to dig it up from your own pockets for the month just past, since I understand that you haven't been collecting it."
"Is ... is that all?" I said.
Mr. Smith frowned and lowered his voice. "No," he said, "there's the Federal Income Tax. Don't ask me to act happy about that, and don't ask me to give any advice on it. They're very rigid people, and they don't allow a man a bit of leeway, the way we do. You're on your own there, like all of us. Well, into each life some rain must fall. Right? Nice to have met you folks, and I'll be waiting for you tomorrow." He smiled and waved and went out to his car and drove away.
Pop and Holly and me looked at each other, and finally Pop poured out some of that fresh water I had brung, and swallowed it. "Man's throat gets dry," he said.
"Holly," I said, "what is all this going to cost us?"
"I—I don't know, Toby. We don't have all the tax bills yet. And I'll have to study up on the income tax."
"We have been making a hundred dollars clear a week," I said. "
That's better than we done when we was living off the government. How much do we make now that the government is starting to live off us?"
Holly give a sigh. "Less, I suppose."
"What do we do about it?" I said. "Do we go back to living off the government?"
Pop drew himself up tall, and said, "We do not! They have tried everything they could think of, from trying to run us off the land to trying to coax us off, and from trying to take them twins away to sending a hurricane that I don't doubt they stirred up with one of them atom bombs. Now they are trying taxes. We are going to stay right here and pay them taxes and fight it out! Holly is with me. Are you with me, Toby?"
I took a deep breath, and said, "Yes, Pop, I am with you. But I reckon us Kwimpers are crazy, after all.”
Scanner’s Notes
My grandmother gave me this book to read when I was 13. It has been one of my favorites and I still have the battered 1959 paperback that she gave me. Unfortunately , I did not know about the Elvis movie based on the book (“Follow That Dream”) before my Grandmother died. She would have enjoyed it.
The book was reprinted for a 50th Anniversary Edition in 2009, but was not available in an ebook format.
This text is from the 1959 version, with all of the colloquialisms and original misspellings intact. I may have missed some OCR errors in my editing though.
Pioneer, Go Home! Page 24
