by A. J. Markam
All RIGHT!
“Thank you,” I said, then gestured at the bandits’ bodies. “I’ll take what they’ve got, and then I’ll go.”
I found another three silver and 75 coppers, not to mention a better pair of boots and gloves that gave me extra armor in addition to +2 Stamina each. Plus the Mage’s body yielded a better belt with an accompanying strap over the shoulder that gave me +4 armor and +3 Intelligence. A pretty damn good haul overall.
“Did you want this man’s weapon?” the wife asked.
I saw that she was holding out the Bandit Mage’s staff. That’s actually what it was called when I selected it: ‘Bandit Mage’s Staff’ appeared in a little window.
And I saw that it would give me +20 intellect.
Hell YEAH I want that man’s weapon!
Not only that, but the staff magically snapped into place on my back, somehow held in place by the crisscrossed leather strap across my body. I had no idea how, but I wasn’t about to look a magical gift horse in the mouth.
“Thanks, guys,” I said. “I’ll be on my way now.”
“One last thing, stranger,” the wife said.
“Yes?” I said, expecting to hear some overblown profession of eternal gratitude.
“You really should take a bath,” she told me instead.
“It’s the next thing on my list,” I said grumpily, then turned and left the house.
14
Actually, the bath was going to have to wait. The soul counter had 40 souls – which meant I could now forge a new collar and summon my succubus!
First I went by the original farmer who originally sent me off on the bandit quest and collected my goodies: 500 XP, two silver, and a Horticulturist’s Cloak that added +3 armor and +2 Intelligence.
Then I summoned Stig.
“Everything turn out alright, boss?” he asked.
“Yes – thanks for your help in the fight.”
“Sure thing, boss!”
“Plus I got the 40 souls, so now it’s time to summon the succubus!”
“…oh,” the imp said with a distinct lack of enthusiasm.
Despite Stig’s misgivings, we ventured deep into the woods where we were sure not to be disturbed. I brought out the book the dwarven witch had given me and opened up the cover. Lo and behold, there was a new page of writing in it.
I started reading aloud, and the words just came pouring out of my mouth. At the same time, my hands and fingers moved in ritualistic patterns I wasn’t consciously controlling.
As I spoke, shadows begin to come from the trees all around me, floating through the air like dark mist, swirling around and solidifying into a circular object. The more I chanted, the more solid the object came. The counter up in the left-hand corner of my vision begin to drop, sold by soul, until it plummeted down to zero – and a crack like a thunderbolt crashed all around me.
An object dropped out of the mist and fell at my feet. I picked it up and inspected it carefully.
It was a black velvet choker, the kind you see on hipster chicks and in Victorian paintings. But instead of a cameo silhouette engraved in ivory, the choker had a tiny skull made out of pure white stone instead. The detail was amazing – almost like it was a real skull, only an inch tall.
“Uh oh,” Stig muttered under his breath.
I looked over at him. “What do you mean, ‘uh oh’?”
“You really going to go through with this, boss?”
“Of course I am.”
“That’s why I said ‘uh oh.’”
“Yeah, but why?”
“I told you – hot chicks are nothing but trouble.”
“It’s going to be fine,” I reassured him.
“Sure, boss,” he said, but shook his head ‘no.’
I sighed and rolled my eyes, then turned back to the book. Another page had appeared. Apparently this one was how to summon the succubus itself.
I followed the directions, although once again I had no idea how I knew the language.
I sat cross-legged on the ground, placed the choker collar in front of me on the grass, and began to read out loud.
Shadows gathered all around me. Day turned to twilight, then night. The ground beneath the collar began to crack, and purple light shone from the gaps in the earth as black smoke billowed into the air.
It was interesting – other than the crazy horror movie developing around me, these new incantations contained a couple of warnings.
“Never fall in love with a succubus,” I read aloud in whatever bizarre language I was speaking, though I understood the words’ meaning perfectly. “Only a man who is pure of heart can resist the lure of the succubus.”
Suddenly, the purple light disappeared in a bright flash, night turned back to day, the earth closed up – and the collar was gone.
“What the hell?” I asked in frustration.
“That’s a laugh,” a sultry voice spoke behind me. “There is no man who’s pure of heart.”
I turned around, startled – and saw the most astoundingly beautiful woman I had ever seen before.
I’m talking real life, movies, magazines – anything. She even put Robert’s succubus to shame.
As I stood there staring, mouth wide open, she giggled and smirked at the same time.
“Like what you see... master?” she asked sardonically, like she was mocking me – but she still turned around to give me the full show.
Her face was classically beautiful, with high collarbones, slender nose, and delicate features. She had perfectly shaped eyebrows and thick eyelashes. Her lips were sensual and soft, with the wet sheen of lip gloss on them. Her teeth were snow-white pearls, perfectly formed and even.
Her black hair was a wild mass of luxuriously thick curls that spilled down her shoulders and back.
The irises of her eyes were sapphire blue, but rather than looking cold, they warmed me to my core when I looked into them.
Her neck was long and graceful, and displayed the black velvet choker I had just summoned moments ago.
Her body was lithe like a dancer’s. Her arms were incredibly thin and toned, her midriff was soft but with the light contours of muscle beneath, and her legs were slender and graceful. She had one of the smallest waists I had ever seen on a woman, ever.
The parts of her that were not like a ballerina’s were her chest and ass. Those belonged to a Playboy Playmate of the Year. Maybe even Playmate of the Century.
Seriously, she had the largest natural breasts I had ever seen that still managed to remain absolutely firm and perky, fully defying gravity. They were full and round, with tantalizing cleavage, so perfect that you would’ve sworn they were fake, except that they were too perfect to be fake.
And her ass – to paraphrase Robert the QC Warlock, my GOD it was a work of art. After the tiny waist and lusciously wide hips, her ass just kind of appeared out of nowhere. BOOM! A bubble butt so firm and shapely it would’ve put J-Lo’s to shame, even in her prime.
Every part of her perfect body was on ample display, because all she wore was the skimpiest leather bra and thong imaginable. Her bra was just big enough to support her gorgeous breasts and cover her nipples, because it was so skimpy it didn’t cover much more. The two cups were joined in the center of her chest by a tiny metal skull less than a half an inch tall.
Don’t even get me started on the thong. It wasn’t exactly a Brazilian bathing suit, but the sides were basically strings, and the leather between her shapely thighs couldn’t have been much bigger than a postage stamp. The thong certainly didn’t hide ANY of her ass – it basically covered her crack just enough to make sure you didn’t get too lustfully obscene a glimpse of her nether regions.
She was fairly tall – although the three-inch stiletto heels on her thigh-high leather boots made her look taller than she actually was. The boots were one of the sexiest parts of the outfit – soft and weathered looking, but skintight. Surely she was only able to stand because she was aided by magic. Those stiletto heels should have punched ri
ght through the ground, they were so sharp. Plus her feet were so tiny that she should have keeled over – but instead she walked confidently and gracefully with every step.
That was another thing I was thankful for – she appeared to have human feet rather than goat’s hooves. Thank you, game designers.
Oh – did I mention that her skin was completely red? Red as a ruby, though with the soft luster of human skin. There was definitely nothing hard-edged or rock-like about her, that was for sure.
She also had two black horns curling from the sides of her heads – although rather than grotesque or evil, somehow they were graceful and elegant, and managed to set off the curves of her body even better.
Like the other succubus I had seen in the town square, she also had a pair of wings – but unlike the other woman’s raven feathers, hers were like a bat’s.
Maybe a bat is the wrong comparison. More like an elegant dragon’s, sculpted out of leather and shiny black latex. They were folded up on her back, so I had no idea how big they were, but they complemented the black of her bra, thong, and boots perfectly.
She also had a tail – a long, thin, curling, sensual red thing that tapered off into a triangle at the tip.
Truly, a devilish pin-up girl if ever there was one.
She was looking at me with a little smirk – an I know you’ve been a bad, bad boy and I know you want me to do something about it kind of look.
Suddenly her features scrunched up into an expression of disgust. “What in Light’s Blood is that smell?”
Oh crap.
My imp sold me out.
“The boss,” Stig said cheerfully as he pointed right at me.
“I got sprayed by a skunk!” I protested.
The succubus pinched her nose with her delicate forefinger and thumb, which ended in long, feminine, plum-colored nails. “I wanted to serve a human master, not a Stench Beast.”
Even her voice with her nose pinched shut couldn’t make her sound less than incredibly sexy.
Despite all that, though, I was super-annoyed by her attitude. “Well, your first act of service can be to help me find a stream.”
“Anything,” she agreed, “as long as I don’t have to smell that anymore.”
15
As we tromped through the forest, the succubus kept her distance – both physically and conversationally. She kept slightly ahead of me, about 15 feet to my right, and she was mostly silent.
“Are you sure we’re headed towards a stream?” I asked, annoyed that this devilish goddess was treating me like a leper.
“Yes,” she said simply.
The fact she could act like a dowsing rod was bizarre to me. I hadn’t seen a single river the whole day, or even heard a hint of a burbling creek.
“How do you know?”
“I’m a creature of fire. I wouldn’t go so far as to say that water is an enemy, but it’s not the most pleasant thing for me to experience unless it’s piping hot. As such, I can feel its presence when it’s nearby – almost like a sixth sense.”
“Huh,” I said, not sure what to make of that.
We traveled a bit longer in silence, which made me nervous. Damn it, she made me nervous. Hot women always made me nervous.
And I felt bad about just staring at her breasts and ass in silence – mostly because I knew she could tell I was staring.
So I tried to make conversation. “I’m Ian, by the way.”
She didn’t answer.
“What’s your name?”
“Alaria.”
“Alaria… that’s a really pretty name.”
She gave me an amused look. “Are you going to ask me if I come here often?”
“Just trying to make conversation,” I muttered in irritation, finally broken out of my hot-chick haze.
“There’s no need,” she said, then pointed at the choker around her neck. “This collar means you don’t have to. I just do whatever you tell me to, master,” she said with mock sweetness. Actually, more like sugarcoated arsenic.
“Stig and I get along just fine,” I said grumpily.
Alaria looked down at my imp, who was waddling along next to me.
“Is that true?” she asked with a touch of mockery. “Do you and master get along ‘just fine’?”
Stig looked up at me. Then he looked back at Alaria.
“Oh yes,” he said, but he shook his head ‘no.’
“You little jerk,” I muttered.
Alaria laughed out loud, and it was a glorious sound – like the pealing of church bells turned into an angel’s voice.
Even though her body had all the lustful trappings of a devil.
“There’s no reason we can’t all get along,” I said.
She stopped laughing and looked off vacantly at the horizon.
“Whatever you say, master,” she said dully.
“You don’t have to call me that.”
She raised an eyebrow. “What do you want me to call you – ‘boss’?”
“No – Stig doesn’t have to call me boss, either. He just does.”
“I’m sure,” she replied.
“No, really – watch! Stig, stop calling me ‘boss’!”
“You got it, boss.”
“See?” I said in triumph. “And I’m not punishing him or anything!”
She smirked. “Yeah, enslaving him, that’s not a punishment at all.”
Jesus. Whatever the programmers had done to this portion of the game, it was taking a really weird turn.
“Whatever,” I snapped. “Let’s just have a good time, go on some quests – ”
“And kill people,” she said brightly.
She didn’t seem to be joking.
I looked at her askance. “…I guess?”
I mean, technically, that’s exactly why people played the game – although nobody really said it out loud.
We’ll have adventures! And see beautiful things! And experience a magical world!
And kill people!
“Anyway, you can just call me Ian,” I said. Then I stupidly held out my hand to shake hers, like a chump with a crush.
She looked at it disdainfully, then turned back to the forest. “I’ll just call you master, if it’s all the same to you.”
“Fine,” I grumbled. “Call me whatever you want.”
“Really? Can I call you Goat Anus?” she asked playfully.
“No.”
“How about Orc Balls?”
“No.”
“Vicious Taint?”
“No.”
For the first time since she’d arrived she seemed to be enjoying herself. “But you said I could call you whatever I – ”
“Just call me master,” I snapped.
“Okay,” she grinned. “Master. By the way, did you know that the word ‘boss’ sounds like the Impish word for ‘asshole’?”
“What?!” I asked in surprise.
“Yes – bos-sh. It means ‘anus’ in Impish.”
Stig gave her a dirty look like he wanted to kick her ass.
“Stig, is that true?” I demanded.
“NO, boss,” the imp said, though he shook his head ‘yes.’
“HEY – ”
“Is that a river?” the imp asked, then sprinted off through the forest.
Little bastard…
But he was right about the river. I could hear water rushing across rocks somewhere nearby.
“Huh, you were right,” I said to Alaria.
“You thought I was lying?”
“No – I – ”
“I’m just playing with you, master,” she said, and smiled sweetly as she turned to face me. Her breasts jiggled tantalizingly, and I basically lost every coherent thought in my head as I watched her boobs wobble behind her bikini top.
“We’re here,” she announced, and I emerged from my mammary-induced hypnosis.
It was a small river, maybe 20 feet wide, with crystal-clear water spilling over rocks of all sizes. Rapids and small waterfalls made
up the majority of the river, but off to the side were still, limpid pools that seemed to be at least four feet deep. Perfect for bathing in.
Except that… I had an audience.
Alaria could sense my hesitation.
“You know, you don’t have anything I haven’t seen before.” She made a face. “You definitely have an odor I’ve never smelled before, but I’m sure everything else is the same.”
I just stood there uncertainly, unsure whether I wanted the hottest woman I’d ever seen to see me naked.
She sighed, crossed her arms, and shut her eyes. “Go ahead, I won’t look.”
I quickly stripped down to my birthday suit, leaving my belt, bags, staff, and boots on the ground, and my other clothes in a pile on top of a fallen tree.
I retrieved the bar of soap, then guiltily glanced back at her, just to get another glimpse of those luscious breasts without her knowing I was ogling her –
She was staring right at me with one eyebrow slightly raised and an amused half-smile on her lips.
I was horrified and outraged at the same time. “You said you weren’t going to look!” I yelled as I clamped my hands over my junk.
“I’m a succubus, a demoness from hell. Of course I’m going to lie.”
“Eyes over there!” I yelled, and was about to point until I realized that I needed my hand to help cover my nads.
“Where?” she asked politely, as though she were confused.
“Over there!” I shouted, gesturing with my head off into the forest.
“Where?” she asked a little more insistently.
I knew she was tooling me and just trying to get me to remove my hands from my crotch.
“Look straight up at the sky!” I barked.
“Yes master,” she cooed, then raised her head and looked up at the tree canopy.
What pissed me off even more than her insolence, was that I was getting kind of turned on by it.
But being turned on wasn’t a problem for much longer. As soon as I dipped my foot in the water, I yelped and withdrew it.
“What’s wrong?” Alaria asked with fake solicitousness as she kept staring into the sky. “Did something jump out of the water and eat you up?”
“No, the water’s ice cold.”
