by Lexi Blake
“He’s not faking it. If you had been there with me, you would know. No one can fake that. Someone tried to give him a cure and it went poorly. The man I met this afternoon, he wasn’t the same Steven.”
“Only because he’s forgotten,” her mom said ominously. “But anything that can be forgotten can be remembered. What if this cure takes some time to work? What if he wakes up and remembers exactly who he is? Then where will you be? I hope you know what you’re doing. You’re betting all our lives on this group.”
Her mom knew how to make an exit. She walked away and Roni walked into the bedroom, looking for the one thing in the world that could truly calm her.
Her daughter.
Vi was asleep, her arms wrapped around the doll Roni’s boss had given her at her second birthday. They hadn’t had a party because they rarely had people to the small flat they rented.
Vi deserved a party. She deserved cake and friends and to be able to walk in the sun and not be afraid.
Tears threatened as she looked down at her baby. So much had gone wrong, but Vi was one good thing to have come from the mess she’d made. She had to do everything she could to give her a better life.
Don’t be afraid of me.
He’d known her.
What if her mother was right? It didn’t matter that Tucker was some kind of saint. He hid a devil, and the devil seemed to know her name.
A moth to the flame. She was going to get burned all over again. She just had to make sure her daughter survived.
Chapter Three
Tucker came awake with a hole in his gut. Hungry. He was so damn hungry. His stomach growled and he forced himself to sit up.
The lamp was on and all around him there was the soft sound of medical equipment beeping and purring. This wasn’t his bed, but he often wasn’t in his own bed. What had happened? He’d been having the strangest dream and then…
He was at The Garden and he’d been in a coma for weeks. He’d woken up and Rebecca had told him he’d had an incident with his heart and Tag had offered to pull a tube out of his dick. That felt way more normal than it should. Something hadn’t been normal though.
Veronica. Roni had been here.
“Hey, stay calm, man. If those beeps get bad, they won’t unhook you.” Robert was sitting in a rocker to the side of the bed Tucker was in. “You’ve still got an IV and a whole bunch of attachments reading your heart rate, but I managed to talk them into taking out the catheter. Owen was right. Rebecca has a gentle touch. You didn’t even wake up.”
At least he’d been spared that humiliation, but he wasn’t worried about his medical state. “Where is she?”
“She’s having dinner with Owen,” Robert replied. “Steph is around though. She’s been checking on you.”
“I meant Veronica.” Had she left? Where was she? She’d been missing for years. He remembered that much. Finding her had been part of the mission they’d been working in Munich. The minute he’d heard her name, he’d known she was important to his own story. He hadn’t been able to recall any of the pertinent facts about her, but there had been a feeling he couldn’t deny. A hollowness. Like he’d always known something was missing and it now had a name.
Roni.
She couldn’t be gone.
“Veronica Croft?” Robert sat down at the end of the bed. “I saw Solo bring her in. I haven’t met her yet. I’m sorry I wasn’t here when you woke up. I was with Ari visiting her mom. She’s been under the weather. I should have been here.”
“I’m sure you rarely left my bedside. You get to have a life, Rob. Do you know where Solo took her? Is she still here?” She had to be in London. If she left, he would lose her again, and he couldn’t lose her. He had zero idea why, but he knew the most important thing in his life right now was getting close to Veronica. He needed to talk to her, needed to figure out why she was constantly in his dreams.
“I’m not sure. I got back and they told me what happened. I came in here to wait for you to wake up,” Robert replied. “Solo took her and left a couple of hours ago. She’s coming back in the morning. We’re having a big meeting in the conference room and I think she’s going to be there.”
“I want to see her tonight.” He couldn’t lie in bed and wait. Too much could happen. He needed to know she was okay. Why had she been in hiding all this time? Why? God, he needed to know if she’d been hiding from him.
Robert stood, his brow furrowing in obvious worry. “I think you should take it easy. A lot has happened in the three weeks since you’ve been down. We need to talk about it.”
Robert was the most reasonable of his brothers. If Owen were here, he’d already be plotting how to get them out of the building. But no, he had to deal with Robert, who always proceeded with caution. He didn’t have time for caution. “How about you write me up a memo? Pass me that kit the docs left.”
Robert sighed and put the small container on Tucker’s tray. It was a good thing that Rebecca and Steph were always prepared. They’d left exactly what he needed to get out of this place. He opened it and found the bandage and gauze that would make this whole process far less messy.
Tucker gripped the line that held his IV.
“What are you doing?” Robert’s hands went to his hips. “Don’t do that.”
He eased the cannula out and thanked the universe muscle memory was a thing. He bandaged his hand with very little trouble. All that mattered was he wasn’t tethered to this freaking bed. “It’s fine. I know what I’m doing.”
He stood on shaky legs and glanced around. This wasn’t the bedroom in his apartment. He wasn’t completely certain where he was. He wasn’t in the clinic Stephanie Carter had put together, but then it was really only for minor accidents. They would have put him in a place suitable for long-term care.
He needed pants.
“Yeah, you’re walking around with your ass hanging out.” Robert followed him into the hall. “You planning on running around Chelsea screaming her name? It’s a subtle play.”
“I’m going to find pants and then I’ll run around Chelsea very quietly screaming her name.” The important thing was finding her and making sure she didn’t disappear again. Although if he could find her and a cheeseburger, it would be a good thing. “Does anyone have Solo’s number?”
Someone had to have it, right? Did CIA agents give out their numbers? Ezra probably knew where she was. He said he didn’t want to have anything to do with his ex-wife, but Tucker was pretty sure the man knew where she was at all times. He would likely say he needed to know where the enemy was or some shit, but Tucker knew better. There was some serious drama that would play out between the two of them.
Robert strode beside him as he walked out into the hall. “I don’t think calling Solo is a good idea.”
He was right. If he called her, then she would know he was coming. “Yeah, I don’t want to give her a heads-up. Smart thinking. I need the element of surprise.”
“She’ll be surprised all right,” Robert agreed. “Everyone will be since you’re supposed to be in bed. They’ll be super surprised when you have another heart attack and die.”
“I’m not going to die. I feel fine. Rebecca would have taken me to a hospital if I was in serious danger.” He stopped because he wasn’t exactly sure where he was. The Garden was a big building and he wasn’t in the office section or the residential part. “Where’s the elevator?”
Robert stared him down. “I thought you knew everything.”
Tucker sighed. “Come on, man. I have to find her.”
“Veronica? She’s important?”
Tucker nodded. “Yes. I can’t explain, but I know she was important to me.”
“In a you-were-in-love-with-her way or a she-tried-to-kill-you way?” Robert’s question was fair since he’d recently been through the wringer with his ex-wife, who’d also been the reason he landed in McDonald’s clutches in the first place.
“I don’t know. Maybe both.” He couldn’t be sure. The way his life seemed to go he�
��d been in love with her and she would turn out to be an assassin with a hit on him.
“Can we slow down for a minute and talk this out? You know nothing about this woman.”
“I know I need to find her.” How could he make Robert understand? “This voice inside me is saying I need her.”
“Need who?” Jax came out of a door to the left. He carried a can of soda and smiled broadly as he caught sight of Tucker. “Hey, man. You’re up. How are you feeling?”
And now he knew where he was. The basement halls all looked the same. Jax kept an office here. Jax was exactly who he needed. Owen might help him run up and down the streets looking for Roni, but Jax might actually be able to find her. “Hey, I need you to figure out where Solo would stash a guest. I assume she’s a guest, right? Or did Solo like arrest her or something?”
She would be in a worse mood if she was stuck in a cell somewhere. But then of course she might be in a better mood if he rescued her. She might be more inclined to talk to him if he saved her. There was always a bright side to things.
“I think Solo’s coming in,” Jax said, holding up his phone. “I got a text from Tag a few minutes ago. He said I’m supposed to go down and meet Solo and escort her and our guests up. Penny got their rooms ready. They’re in a two bedroom on the fourth floor. Not far from you, actually. Do we know who she’s bringing in?”
“Not really,” Robert said. “And that’s a problem. We have no idea what this woman wants. She could want revenge for something Tucker doesn’t even remember he did. Have we forgotten that we got shot up by the last woman who said she knew one of us?”
“She did know you,” Jax shot back. “She was your wife. Who is this new chick saying she is?”
“I used to work with her at Kronberg. So did Rebecca.” He wouldn’t believe she was coming in until he actually saw her walk through the doors. She would have to come in through the garage at this time of day. “It’s night, right?”
He didn’t even know whether it was light or dark outside. There hadn’t been a window in his room. Like there hadn’t been windows in the cells they’d been kept in when he’d been one of McDonald’s soldiers. He hadn’t known whether he would walk out into the light or have cover of darkness. His body had lost its natural rhythms. It was one more form of torture.
“Yeah, it’s almost ten p.m.,” Robert affirmed. “Why don’t we let Jax do what he needs to do and I’ll get you something to eat. When he’s done, Jax can come down to the kitchen and give us a report. I don’t think you need to confront this woman until we know who she is and why she’s here. I know Tag wants to question her, but I want to know what she’s been hiding from for the last couple of years.”
“Me.” It was what he was afraid of. “She was hiding from me.”
Then why had she shown him such compassion earlier? She could have walked away, but she’d stayed with him. She’d been holding his hand when he’d fallen asleep. She’d calmed him down and that was why he’d been able to relax.
He shouldn’t have fallen asleep. He should have stayed with her.
He shouldn’t have left her. She’d been the one sleeping that day. A flash of Roni lying wrapped in white cotton sheets whispered across his brain. Her hair spread across the pillows and her eyes closed as the early morning light caressed her skin.
“Don’t go there,” Robert said, staring at him like he knew what was going on in his head. “I think you should get back in bed.”
The pain stabbed at him, but he took a deep breath and tried to let it go. He wouldn’t find her there. If she was here, then he wanted to see her.
He turned and started toward the elevators.
“He’s killing me.” Robert groaned behind him and then he heard the sound of feet pounding as his brothers caught up to him.
“So we keep close and make sure she’s not here to murder him. You know half this job is making sure one of us has backup while he’s doing dumb shit,” Jax said, falling in beside him. “I’m sorry I missed out on your ex. All the good drama happens when I’m not around.”
“It wasn’t good drama,” Robert groused. “It was awful and a whole lot of people died and Rebecca got kidnapped and Tucker went into a coma.”
“That last part wasn’t actually your ex-wife’s fault,” Tucker pointed out. “It was Levi Green’s, and we need to talk about him, too. I don’t honestly remember much after he injected me. Is he alive?”
The man deserved a bullet, but his death would complicate things. Green might be the only person who could tell him the truth.
“That’s one of the things we should talk about,” Robert insisted. “Once you get back in bed.”
Jax shook his head. “He’s not getting back in bed, man. Tucker, we think Levi’s alive. I tracked Solo putting him on a plane in Munich that went back to DC. I lost them from there because the CIA is pretty damn good at hiding their tracks. I believe he was taken somewhere to be debriefed. Hopefully in the harshest of ways. He hasn’t resurfaced so I think they’re either holding him or they’ve gotten rid of the problem.”
“If they took him back to the States, they wanted to talk to him.” Robert seemed to give up on getting him back to the room. “I have a hard time believing they would kill him. He knows way too much, and he’ll likely work out some kind of deal. He’ll be back when we least expect it. Has anyone asked Solo what she did with him?”
“I’m sure Tag did and I’m sure she told him shit,” Jax replied. “The question is can we get Ezra to smooth talk her. She might tell Ezra.”
“He’s been in a bear of a mood since she betrayed us,” Robert said. “You should be glad you missed that.”
He sent Robert a glare. “I missed it because I was in a coma.”
Robert shrugged. “You still got to miss it. I’ve been avoiding him. He didn’t even smile at the wedding.”
Tucker stopped. He’d missed a lot. “Wedding?”
Robert winced. “Yeah, Ari and I got married.”
“So did Rebecca and Owen,” Jax said with a smile. “Double weddings are a thing here. We had it right in The Garden, so you were kind of there. Not that we had the ceremony in your room or anything. It was in the actual garden part of The Garden. I thought we should do a whole Weekend at Bernie’s thing and have you stand with us, but Rebecca put the kibosh on it. I had picked out an outfit for you including sunglasses and this awesome hat for the pictures. She said no. Something about keeping you hooked up to all the machines. Doctors never let you have any fun.”
“You didn’t even wait for me to wake up?” This team was his family. “It hasn’t even been a month. Most people can’t plan a wedding in a month.”
Robert’s expression had gone solemn. “We didn’t know when you were going to wake up—if you were going to wake up—and honestly, after everything that went down, it was kind of a live-for-the-moment thing. Between what happened to you, and Sasha and Peter dying…I didn’t want to wait.”
Tucker took a deep breath. Sasha had died right in front of him. Peter had gotten out of the spy game and he’d still died. Dante had betrayed them all. Robert had needed an affirmation of life. They all had. “Yeah, I get that. But I hope you took pictures. Did he cry?”
Jax grinned. “Like a baby.”
“I did not,” Robert shot back. “I teared up once. It was my wedding. And I’m pretty sure this time my wife won’t hand me over to a crazy doctor. I was emotional. And I missed my best man. I’m sorry I’m acting like a mother hen, but I’ve sat at your bedside for weeks hoping you would wake up.”
He got it. “I know you were worried, but I have to find Veronica. She can fill in so many gaps. And if possible, I need to talk to Levi Green.”
“I’m not letting him anywhere near you.” Robert looked at him like he’d gone insane.
“He wanted me to remember for a reason. I think I worked with him. I had this dream that I was meeting him somewhere.” And it had felt like a beginning. It had felt like he was starting something impor
tant.
“That doesn’t prove anything except that the fucker is in your head,” Jax replied. “A dream isn’t a memory.”
“He stuck a needle in your neck. Of course you had a nightmare about him. Given that we don’t know what that drug was or how it was supposed to work, we can’t trust anything it does to your memory.” Robert pushed the button for the elevator. “Can you put on pants before we confront the next woman who might try to kill one of us?”
The elevator doors opened and Owen was standing there. A grin spread across his face. “You’re up. Tucker, mate, you have no idea how we’ve worried. I thought you might be stuck in that bed forever.”
“Is that why you posed him?” Jax asked.
Dear god, what had his brothers been doing? “He posed me? What the hell does that mean?”
Owen shrugged, holding the door open. “Seemed a shame to leave you like that. Besides, they’re supposed to move you around a bit. Lying in one position is bad for a body. I just took it a bit further. Got costumes and everything. Don’t worry. I took pictures. I made a book of them. I call it All Tuckered Out. Everyone gets one for Christmas this year.”
It was good to know his friends had his back. Sometimes his brothers were assholes. But it was probably pretty funny. He was self-aware enough to know he probably would have done the same if he’d been on the other side. “I look forward to it. Now, I need to get down to the parking garage. Solo’s bringing Veronica back.”
She was coming back. Willingly. It was a good sign. Or was Solo forcing her back? Solo would do a lot to help her cause with Ezra Fain. She loved her ex-husband and had done some crazy shit to get his attention.
“Pants first,” Robert insisted as he pressed the button for the floor they all lived on.
“I don’t know, mate,” Owen said as the doors closed and they started going up. “If we’re worried she’ll react to him like Rebecca did, him being in a johnny with his arse hanging out might make him less threatening.”
He reached behind and pulled the gown together. No one ever gave him any dignity. “How long did she stay after I fell back asleep?”
