Moonlight

by Lisa Kessler

  “Okay. Jason is on his way over,” Adam said. “And he’ll be sure Malcolm doesn’t know anything yet.”

  Aren nodded, then they both turned toward me.

  “What? Should I go hide with the horses in the barn?”

  Adam walked over and took my hand. Aren frowned and turned his head to look out the window.

  “Let’s go outside,” Adam whispered.

  He walked with me in the moonlight. It was so close to the full moon that we could see everything without a flashlight, even without superhuman eyesight. When we got to the barn, Adam stopped to look at me.

  “Aren has amazing hearing, and I don’t want him to know we’re leaving. Especially not right now while he’s injured.” He glanced up at the house and then met my eyes again. “I guess we shouldn’t have checked you out of the hotel yet. I thought we’d get Aren home and take off, but with him injured, I can’t leave yet. Not now.”

  Not ever, I thought to myself.

  “I’ll just visit with the horses,” I offered. “Will that mask my scent enough?”

  “Yeah, it should.” He sighed and looked up at the moon shaking his head. “I know this is really crappy, Lana. I hate that it has to be this way.” Adam met my eyes again. “I want you in my arms, but I can’t risk Jason and my father catching your scent on my clothes.” A muscle in his cheek tightened. “You deserve better than this. You saved my brother’s life.”

  My eyes welled with tears and the urge to kiss him tormented me. “Not your fault I’m a jaguar.” I blinked back the tears and managed a smile. “Just so you know, I would kiss you right out of your boots if I could.”

  The corner of his mouth tilted up into a crooked smile that melted my heart. “I’m going to hold you to that later.” His gaze slid over my entire body. “I’m going to do more than kiss you.”

  I wet my lips. “Promise?”

  When we heard a car drive up Adam groaned. “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

  “I’ll be here.”

  He turned and jogged back up to the house. I walked farther into the barn, chatting with the horses that put their heads over their stall doors to visit. I could see why Adam loved it here. It was peaceful and simple.

  Too bad I couldn’t stay.

  Chapter Thirty

  Adam

  I couldn’t wait to have Lana back in my arms. After nearly two hours of assisting Jason with Aren’s ankle, I was emotionally and physically drained. The bone had fragmented into several different pieces, and he should’ve had surgery, but Jason did the best he could. It wasn’t life-threatening. Not worth the risk of taking him to a hospital.

  Before tonight, I felt like the Pack would be fine without me. When it came time, Aren would ascend to the Alpha. But now there were questions I couldn’t answer. What if something happened to Malcolm before Aren’s ankle healed? What if his ankle was never right again? Would someone else in the Pack challenge him for the Alpha position? It would be within their rights. He might not be able to win if they did, especially not now.

  I ground my teeth together and walked faster toward the horses. Toward Lana.

  “Is everything okay?”

  Without hesitation, I pulled her into my arms, holding her tight as I kissed her hair.

  “It will be, but Aren’s ankle may never be the same.” I loosened my grip enough to look down into her eyes. “Jason did the best he could. I guess we’ll know in a few weeks when he takes the cast off.” I paused and corrected myself. “I mean, they’ll know.”

  “You can’t leave this place, Adam. They need you and you need them.”

  “I don’t need anyone who can’t treat you like part of the family.”

  She kissed my chest. “Jaguars haven’t been very good to your family.”

  “You’re more than a jaguar. You’re my mate. You saved my brother tonight. And even after you did, he still won’t speak to you. I can’t stay here and subject you to that.” I shook my head. “I’d end up hating every one of them for not accepting you. It’s better to leave before that happens.”

  She looked up at the moon. “Isn’t the moon full tomorrow night?”

  I nodded.

  “So you should stay and run with the Pack.”

  I shook my head. “We’ve gotta get going. It’s only a matter of time until Sasha is back on our tail. Sebastian may be helping her for all we know.”

  “Don’t break their hearts on a full moon. You should run with them.”

  I stared into her dark eyes, unaware until this moment that I could love anyone so much. I brought my hand up to cup her cheek, my thumb brushing over her soft skin. “How did I get so lucky? I have the most beautiful, sexiest, and bravest mate a wolf could ever hope for.”

  She smiled and nuzzled into my palm. “Too bad I’m the wrong species.”

  I bent to kiss her and whispered, “There is nothing wrong with you, Lana. Nothing.”

  A tear rolled down her cheek as she pulled me closer. My hand slid back into her hair, holding her close as the kiss deepened. God, I could not get close enough to her.

  Our tongues tangled, and I growled into the kiss when I felt her hands glide up my stomach and across my chest. Every muscle in my body reacted to her touch. She set me on fire, until my jeans were way too tight and confining. When her hand wandered down, stroking my rock-hard erection through my pants, I broke the kiss. I couldn’t take much more, or I was going to take her right there in the barn aisle.

  “Aren’s in the house resting.”

  “I need you,” she whispered, nibbling at my neck. “Now.”

  Just when I thought I couldn’t get harder, I felt myself pulsing, aching for attention. My lips fused to hers as I walked her backward into the tack room. The rich scent of clean leather surrounded us as I backed her up to the saddle rack. Her nails scratched my skin while she struggled to yank my shirt off.

  Knowing that she wanted me as desperately as I wanted her was making me crazy. Instead of pulling away to lift her T-shirt over her head, I grabbed the neckline and tore it down the middle. I’d buy her another shirt later. I needed her bare skin against mine.

  I kissed down her neck as I unhooked the front clasp of her bra. Feeling the weight of her perfect breasts in my hands made me growl against her skin. When her back arched toward me, offering her body to me, I bent to take her breast into my mouth. Her skin was so soft, with a faint salty taste, and the sound of her gasping my name made me want to take her even higher. I wanted her to shiver with desire when she looked at me later. I wanted to see her glow and know it was because of me.

  I licked each nipple slowly, watching her mouth while her fingers clenched my hair. She ran her hands down my back and around my waist to unbutton my jeans. I groaned with hunger when I felt her slender fingers slip inside to stroke me. I couldn’t take any more teasing. I needed to be inside of her.

  I opened her jeans and pushed them down her hips. I knew she was wet and ready for me. Her lace panties were next. Kissing her hard, over and over, I lifted her onto the side of a saddle.

  She broke the kiss with a gasp. “It’s cold.”

  I grinned, hooking her leg over the saddle horn so she was totally open to me while I freed myself from my jeans. “Want to stop?”

  Her eyes sparkled as she watched me move closer. She wet her lips and shook her head. “Never.”

  I kissed her again, humming into her lips as I brushed against her. Slowly I rocked my hips, rubbing, teasing, enjoying the way she moaned and clutched at my ass trying to force me into her. When I couldn’t wait any longer, I drove my hips forward, moaning as I felt her surround me inch by inch.

  I stared into her eyes, watching every emotion play across her face as I sank deeper inside her. The cool evening breeze teased our skin, and the moonlight filtered through the open door. I worked into her, harder, unable to take my eyes off of her perfect body as she tipped her head back.

  “You are so sexy, Lana.”

  She opened her eyes, looked up
at me, and hooked one leg around my waist, grinding her hips into my thrusts. I could feel the pressure building, but I wasn’t ready for this to be over. Not yet.

  I slid one hand between us, teasing her until I found the right spot. Her entire body shuddered as she gasped, “Faster!”

  Her hands kneaded my buttocks as I slammed into her hard, my fingers working faster until I thought I was going to ignite. “Let go for me,” I growled. “You’re mine.”

  And she was. In that moment we were one. Every muscle in my body contracted as I felt her orgasm seize around me. I peaked with her, rocking until I couldn’t move anymore. I held her close, fighting to catch my breath. I felt her lips kiss the left side of my chest, right over my heart.

  “I love you, Adam,” she whispered. “Forever.”

  I closed my eyes and kissed her hair. “I love you too, Lana. Always.”

  …

  I watched Lana sleeping in my bed and my heart felt too big for my chest. I’d carried her up from the barn after we made love and dozed for a couple hours. Her black hair was strewn across the white pillowcase, and her face looked peaceful. For a second I caught myself wishing we could just be normal people. No wolves, no jaguars. Just people. We could get married and have a family. There would be Little League, horseshows, and Lana could write the novels she dreamed about.

  But it wasn’t so simple. I was going to have to wake her up before the sunrise and rush her out like an unwanted stepchild. I’d open all the windows and put new sheets on the bed so Luke wouldn’t catch her scent in my house. It wasn’t right or fair. Yet, it wouldn’t matter after today. Tonight was the full moon, and in the morning, we’d pack up and hit the road. That wouldn’t be simple either. The Nero Organization wasn’t going to give up searching for Lana. I’d have to be on alert all the time.

  I went in the kitchen and poured a can of Dr. Pepper over a tall glass of ice while I tried to push the thoughts from my head. I didn’t have any control over those things so why worry about them, right?

  Except I did, I realized.

  I took a swallow of caffeine and stared out the darkened kitchen window. This was usually the time I’d sneak out of bed and try to figure out how to get rid of the bimbo I’d brought home. That seemed like ages ago now.

  I walked around the corner to the bedroom. Leaning against the doorframe with my glass, I smiled. Lana was still sound asleep in my bed. It made me want to snuggle up with her and doze off, and at the same time I wanted to pull her in my arms and kiss her awake and make love again until the sun broke over the horizon. Just the thought had my blood pumping.

  What a way to start the day.

  “Is she still here?”

  Holy crap! I almost doused myself with Dr. Pepper. I spun around to see Aren hobbling into the kitchen. In my blissful afterglow, I’d forgotten my brother was still in the house. Guess it was a good choice to pull on a pair of sweatpants earlier.

  “Yeah.”

  “So when are you going to tell the Pack?”

  “I’m not.”

  Aren shot me a look as he leaned on a crutch and bent into the fridge. “You’re just going to keep her a secret? They’ll find out eventually.”

  I took another swig of Dr. Pepper. I couldn’t tell Aren we were leaving. I knew he’d break and Malcolm would find out. Why did finding my mate drag me further and further away from my family? Love was supposed to enhance your life, not tear it apart.

  Aren turned around. “Well?”

  “Didn’t Jason say you needed to keep your leg elevated?”

  “Don’t change the subject.” Aren popped open a can of Dr. Pepper for himself and took a gulp. “I’m your brother. I’ve been keeping this secret too. I didn’t tell Dad or the Pack.”

  “Tell me what you think of Lana.”

  Aren looked confused. “Why? If what I thought mattered, you never would have gone to San Antonio with her, and I never would’ve gotten shot.”

  “Low blow.” I shook my head. “No one asked you to come along.”

  “You never would’ve let me leave town with a jaguar either.” He stared at me, daring me to deny it.

  Instead I shrugged it off. “Probably not. But now you know she wasn’t trying to set me up. She saved your life. None of that makes any difference to you?”

  He stopped making eye contact and stared at the soda can. “I just know Gabe would be alive and I wouldn’t have a broken ankle if Lana had never caught your eye.”

  I set my glass down on the countertop harder than I meant to. “How can you put all this on her? She didn’t even know what she was the night I met her. She can’t remember when she shifts. Until I told her, she had no idea she was a jaguar.”

  “And now she does. That doesn’t make her your mate.”

  My hands clenched into fists at my sides. “Lay off, Aren. You’re in no place to give me relationship advice.”

  “Just because I haven’t found my mate doesn’t mean that you have. That’s all I’m saying. Can’t you see what she’s doing to you? You’ve been my brother and my closest friend our entire lives, and now in the span of two weeks, she’s already come between us, and if the Pack finds out they’re going to want to know why you think you’re in love with Gabe’s killer.”

  I stepped in closer until Aren had to lean back. “Lana did not kill Gabe.”

  “Then who did?”

  “Sebastian.”

  Aren’s eyes widened. “The one who came with you to Vegas?” He shoved at my chest, pushing me back so he could hobble by. “I’ll kill him.”

  I sighed. “He’s not so easy to kill.”

  Aren wheeled on me. “Jesus, Adam! Are you the protector of jaguars now? Have you forgotten who you are?” He shook his head. “Forget it. You do whatever the hell you want. I’ll watch over the Pack and bring Gabe’s killer to justice. Have fun with your kitty.”

  He rounded the corner, and I punched the cabinet so hard that the wood splintered and cracked open. When I turned around Lana was standing in the doorway draped in one of my dress shirts with tears shining on her cheeks.

  “Your brother is an asshole,” she whispered. “But he’s right about one thing. I am tearing your family apart.” I started to argue, but she held up her hand. “You need me out before Luke gets here, and I need some time. Can I borrow your Jeep?”

  Part of me wanted to say no. I wanted to tell her Aren was wrong, she was wrong. But seeing Lana sad, and knowing that loving me was hurting her so deeply, sucked all the fight right out of me.

  “When will you be back?”

  She shrugged, and her dark doe eyes looked up at me. “Tonight you’re a wolf. I’m guessing I should stay away.”

  I ground my teeth together, struggling to find a solution to this mess. “You stay inside. Sasha could already be here looking for you.”

  “I know what she looks like now. I can take care of myself.”

  I walked past Lana to my room and opened a safe in the back of my closet. We weren’t afraid of banks like we were hospitals, but in case something happened to the Pack, we kept a pretty healthy savings in the safe. I went back to the living room and handed her a bound pack of twenty-dollar bills.

  “That’s a thousand dollars. Don’t use your credit cards or an ATM. Sasha worked for the police department. I’m pretty sure she can get your electronic information.” Lana took the money, and I pulled her into my arms, breathing in the scent of her hair.

  “I’m sorry this isn’t simple, but we’ll start over, okay?” I pulled back when she didn’t answer and lifted her chin until she met my eyes. “Don’t give up on me.”

  She nodded and kissed my lips. Her mouth was soft and inviting. I could feel her love flow through me like a warm summer breeze. It felt real—like it was something I could hold in my hand and never let go. Without a word she went in my room to get dressed. She came out with my keys in hand and the wad of cash bulging in her pocket.

  She stared at me for a long time, and I wished I knew what was goin
g on her head, wished I could make her smile again.

  I started toward her, and she rushed into my arms.

  “I’ll see you soon,” I whispered, but she didn’t reply. Instead she just kissed me. In fact to call it a kiss was too simple. It was hunger and passion and love and heartbreak all wrapped up into one deep, slow kiss.

  When she finally pulled back I wasn’t sure I remembered my own name. Her eyes lingered on mine for a moment. “I really do love you, Adam.”

  “I love you, too,” I replied. “See you soon.”

  And then she was gone.

  Chapter Thirty-One

  Lana

  I cried the whole way back into the city limits. At least with the roof off of the Jeep the wind dried my tears for me. My hair whipped around my face in a frenzy, and all I wanted was to keep driving. I wanted the hurt to stop a little more with each mile.

  I heard every word Aren said when he and Adam had been fighting. And most of the time he was right. Here I was wishing I could have a family like Adam’s, and at the same time I was ripping his apart. But it was so hard to make myself leave him, when every part of me wanted to stay.

  The sun was still hidden below the horizon, but the faint glow of daylight was starting to seep across the mountains. It would have been beautiful if I weren’t such a mess. I pulled off at a rest stop and killed the engine. Gradually the colors bled across the dark sky, painting a masterpiece over me. As the sobs and hiccups calmed, rational thought crept back into my mind. First off, I needed to find a place to stay. I couldn’t take Adam’s Jeep when I left town, but I also couldn’t bring it back to him during the day while the other wolves were around. I’d have to wait until sunset. While the Pack changed, I could leave Chaney and call a cab.

  Maybe I’d leave Adam a note, so he wouldn’t worry that something more sinister happened to me.

  Just the thought of saying goodbye made my eyes well with tears again.

  I needed to focus on the future. Sasha was in my future. I needed to stay away from her, and then there was Sebastian. Was he my friend or foe? Hard to say with him. Either way, I couldn’t really trust him. But I had to keep them both away from Adam and the Pack.