by J. Kenner
Immediately, he became drunk on the taste of her, aroused by the feel of her.
He wanted to crush her body against his, to feel her heat, her heart. He wanted to bruise her mouth with his kisses and close his hands tight around her arms. He'd come so damn close to losing her, and he couldn't stand the thought of ever letting her go.
But he didn't--he couldn't. She was too fragile, and the possibility that he might hurt her--more, again--ate at him. So instead, he littered soft kisses on her face, her neck. He stroked her. Touched her. Hell, he worshipped her.
"Dallas?" Tentatively, her fingers brushed his face.
He blinked and focused on a space over her shoulder, knowing that he'd come completely undone if he looked into her eyes. "I thought I'd lost you. First, when you walked out. And then--and then--"
The words caught in his throat, too horrible to even voice. "Christ, Jane. I can't lose you."
Gently, her fingertip stroked his lower lip. Even more gently, she took his chin and forced him to look at her. "I'm right here."
"And thank God for that."
Their eyes met and held, and for a moment there was no time, no space, no world that judged them. There was just them.
Then she lunged, her mouth closing over his with such firm finality that it both broke the moment and had him laughing. "This is how I want you," she said, and he answered her silently but enthusiastically, pulling her hard against him, slamming his mouth against hers. Taking. Consuming. Until he was nothing but heat and need, an ache building in him that he couldn't quench no matter how tight he held her, how hard he kissed her.
He was lost in her, drowning in the sensuality of her fingernails digging into his back. Of her teeth claiming his lips. Of the way her pelvis ground hard against his erection.
With a low, needful groan, he slid his hands down and grabbed her hips, craving an even closer contact. He tightened his grip, pulled her toward him, then immediately released her and stepped back when she released a soft, sharp, "Oh!"
"Jane?"
She stood before him, breathing hard. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry."
He frowned. "I hurt you."
"No. No, I'm fine." She shook her head, but he knew better. "Dallas, please. I don't want--"
"What?"
"Distance." She dragged her teeth over her lower lip as if she was unsure about how he felt.
"Oh, baby. No. Never." He held out his hand. "Come here."
She cocked her head, then narrowed her eyes. "Where?"
"Do you trust me?"
"Yes."
The speed of her reply sang in his heart. "Then let me take care of you."
The corner of her mouth twitched. "If you're thinking about putting me to bed, you can just stop that nonsense right now. I've been in a hospital for almost two days. Between boredom and sedatives, I'm all caught up on my sleep."
"I promise, sleep is the last thing on my mind."
That was a little bit of a lie. She'd protest, he knew, but she needed more sleep. Good sleep, not with nurses popping in and out and a sterile bed with the scent of hospital disinfectant permeating the room.
She'd sleep, all right. But he intended to make sure she was ready for it. That she would drift under, safe and warm and content in his arms.
Gently, he drew her into the bathroom, her favorite room in the apartment. The previous owners had knocked out a wall, turned the small second bedroom into a closet, and used part of that space to make room for a steam shower and an oversize whirlpool tub. The day they'd moved in, Jane had told him this bathroom was a little slice of heaven.
He turned the water on, cranking up the heat the way he knew she liked it, then he stood her on the dense, white rug that filled most of the space.
"Are you tending me?" Her voice was as teasing as her expression, and it was all he could do not to gather her close and sigh with contentment. Yes, he knew she was still aching and sore. No, they didn't know who her attacker was. Yes, her birth father was locked in a cell, and Dallas was the one keeping him there.
But none of that mattered. Not then. All he cared about--all he could hold in his head--was Jane. That she was alive. That she was his.
That she'd come back to him.
"Damn right I'm tending you. Now put your hands up," he added with mock sternness.
She complied, and he peeled off her scrub top, delighted to find that she wore nothing beneath it. Her breasts were perfect, round and firm, and as he watched, her nipples tightened and her areolae puckered. He wanted to roll her nipples between his fingers. He wanted to taste her breasts and feel her arch back and moan, her tits hard and hot in his hands as he licked and sucked, taking her so far that she came in his arms simply from the pressure of the desire building between her legs.
Not now. Not yet.
Instead, he met her eyes. Then he lowered his gaze to her chest, watching it rise and fall as her desire heightened to match his. Her pulse quickened in her throat, another spot that he wanted to lick and tease.
Slowly, he reached for the drawstring of her pants. His fingers brushed her abdomen as he did, the touch so light it was almost negligible. It was enough, though, and he felt the shock of that connection all the way down to his cock. He was rock hard and straining against his jeans. And when her pants slid over her hips to the floor--when she stood before him completely naked--he had to fight the battle of his life not to step forward, slide his hand between her thighs, and feel the creamy heat of her arousal.
Instead, he simply stood and stared and wanted, his gaze caressing her. Reviewing every curve, every nuance. He knew her body as well as he knew his own, and the bruises he saw on her thighs and hips started a slow burn inside him.
He was going to kill whoever did this. No doubt. No question.
"Dallas."
Her voice drew him back.
"I'm okay. I'm safe, and I'm here, and I don't want to think about it."
Reluctantly, he nodded. He should have known she'd read his mind.
"Really," she urged, then grinned mischievously. "Need me to prove it?" As she spoke, she slid her palm down over her ribs, her belly, then between her thighs. She made a whimpering noise, and he almost exploded right then.
"Oh, no you don't."
She lifted a shoulder in a casual shrug. "No? But it feels so good. Are you going to make me a better offer?"
"Damn right," he said, then scooped her off her feet, shocking her into laughter.
Christ, but he wanted to take her. He wanted to claim her like a fucking caveman. Wanted to lose himself inside her and thrust hard and deep until she cried out his name. Until she drew blood with her fingernails, marking him as belonging to her.
He wanted wild heat and violent passion. He wanted to feel everything there was to feel, and then take it up tenfold from that.
He wanted all of that and more--but right now he couldn't have it. Because what he wanted even more was to care for her. To push his own needs aside and tend to her. He'd give her what she wanted, absolutely. But not in the way she expected.
Careful not to press too hard on her various bruises, he gently deposited her in the half-full tub. Then he opened the bottle of bubble bath she'd unpacked first thing, and added two capfuls. The smell of lavender infused the room, and she breathed in deep, then sighed. "You joining me in here?"
"I'm not," he said, then chuckled at her surprised expression. "Now lean back, close your eyes, and let me take care of you."
She sat back, but she didn't shut her eyes. Instead, she reached out for him, twining her bubble-clad fingers with his as she looked so deep into his eyes it seemed as if she'd crawled into his soul. "You've always taken care of me."
Her voice was a whisper, low and intense. It rumbled through him, pushing away the last bits of doubt, the lingering fear that she hadn't fully come back to him.
"I have," he said, the simple words belying the way his heart swelled in his chest. "And I always will."
"Oh, god, Dallas, yes." I'm lean
ing back against a bath pillow, my mind drifting from the scent of lavender even as my senses fire from the temptation of his hands on my heated body.
I'm still sore--my muscles tight and my bruises tender--but those aches are nothing compared to the burning need that Dallas's touch is driving within me. I don't care about the pain or the stiffness or the exhaustion that seems to pull me down like weights sinking in a churning ocean. All I want is his touch. All I care about is that I am back in his arms.
I know that he can tell how desperate I am. How could he not? This is the man who anticipates my needs. Who knows me at least as well as I know myself. And there is no way that he can miss the desire that I know is so palpable it must be wafting off my body like perfume.
I crave his body against mine. I long for wildness. For heat. For bone-melting passion.
And yet it doesn't come.
Instead, he teases me with soft touches and gentle strokes, and I moan softly, biting my lip to keep from begging as his fingertip traces up and down my arm, the sensual rhythm soothing me even as it stokes the embers of my growing passion.
I know what he is doing--he is tending me. Coddling and protecting me. I can feel the tension in his touch, a tightness that underlies the slow and easy sensuality of his caresses. He wants to lose himself in the fire as much as I do, and yet he's holding back. Reining in his own desire in order to pamper me.
But, dammit, I want more than just gentle touches. And though I say nothing, I shift my body, arching my back so that my breasts rise out of the water in a not-so-subtle hint. I want to feel everything building inside me, and then, dammit, I want to explode.
Dallas, however, steadfastly refuses to satisfy me. Instead, he continues his leisurely assault. Fingertips tracing from my shoulder to my wrist. His lips brushing my forehead, his tongue teasing my ear. I feel a throbbing demand between my thighs, and I can't hold back any longer. "Please. Dallas, please."
He says nothing, but the lazy progression of his fingers shifts direction, slipping easily up my arm to caress my shoulder, careful to avoid the still red and tender scrapes from where I fell back on it. Slowly, his fingers tease down toward my breasts. So slowly that I can hardly stand the anticipation, and I hold my breath, waiting for that sweet moment when his finger will caress my nipple.
He draws out the torment--and the pleasure. Slowly, he cups my breast, slipping his hand into the water before bringing his dampened fingers out to toy with my nipple, rolling it between his thumb and forefinger as I bite my lip and moan, losing myself in the fiery pleasure now throbbing between my legs.
"Do you like that?" His lips brush my ear as he speaks, and a flurry of sparks course through me.
"Yes. Oh, god yes."
"Tell me what you want."
"You. More. Please." I have been reduced to single syllables, and I slide my hand down beneath the bubbles and between my legs.
Gently he reaches under the water, takes my wrist, and tugs my hand away. "Oh, no, baby. That's for me."
"Then touch me, dammit."
"Whatever the lady wants," he says, his low voice rumbling with amusement. He stands, moving forward a bit so he's now in my field of vision. His jeans and T-shirt are damp, but he doesn't seem to notice. As for me, all I'm noticing is that he's no longer touching me, and I whimper in protest.
A slow grin plays across his mouth as he leans over to turn the taps back on. The tub has a handheld nozzle, and as he lifts it from its hook, he orders me to stand up, then flips the toggle to drain the tub.
I shiver a bit now that I'm out of the tub, but Dallas soon aims the gentle spray over my body, warming me and sending clusters of bubbles sliding down my skin to melt in the tub before swirling down the drain. He's thorough in his washing of me, aiming the spray at my shoulders, then down the curve of my back. He circles around and concentrates on my breasts, then slowly moves the nozzle down and down until the spray is gently teasing between my thighs. With a little gasp, I spread my legs, wanting more.
He doesn't disappoint, and I release an impassioned moan when he aims the spray at my clit, then reaches between my legs with a cloth to carefully cleanse me, the friction making my core clench tight. I close my eyes, then reach blindly for the towel bar, wanting to steady myself for the storm I know is coming.
Except it doesn't.
I open my eyes, confused.
"Not just yet," he says.
Bastard.
"In that case, I may as well get out." I start to reach for the towel, but he beats me to it.
"Tonight, I'm taking care of you." Slowly--gently--he eases the towel over my body, drying me off, and, in the process, igniting my senses even more. I know it's intentional, and I bite my lip so as to not beg for a more intimate touch. I already know damn well he's not going to touch me until he's ready. And I know that he wants me to beg.
Right now, I'm determined to practice the art of self-control.
I manage for a while. My breath is shaky as he strokes the towel over my breasts, then slides it behind my neck before easing it between my legs. I sigh when he finally wraps me, warm and soft and safe, in the thick terry cloth, then lifts me effortlessly into his arms.
I snuggle against him as he carries me to the bedroom. It's still a mess, filled with open boxes, books, papers, and clothes piled up in corners. He sits me on the edge of the bed, then brushes the hair off my face. I feel like a child, being soothed after a bad dream, and yet there is nothing childlike about the way his touch makes me feel.
"Dallas," I say, and it's all that I say. But I know he hears the plea in my voice.
He bends and kisses me, sweet and gentle and so full of emotion that it makes me gasp. Makes my heart constrict.
He breaks the kiss and meets my eyes, and though I know him almost as well as I know myself, I can't read what I see there. I start to ask, but his finger on my lips silences me.
He takes my towel away, then eases me back so that I am stretched out on the bed. Slowly, he kisses me down my body, and I slip into a state of bliss, my head on the soft feather pillow, my body floating in space as his lips and hands trail gently over my breasts, my belly, my thighs.
I shift, parting my legs, not even trying to be coy about where I want those kisses next, but that touch doesn't come. Instead, I feel the cool brush of material moving up my body.
With a frown, I open my eyes and see that he is pulling up the crumpled sheet to cover me.
"You need rest," he says in response to the astonishment that surely covers my face.
"The hell with that. I need you."
"You have me. Always. I can't believe there was a time when we fought it, because I can't live without you."
The intensity of his voice breaks through me, and my throat feels suddenly thick with tears. "Me neither." I may have walked away from him before the attack, but I could never have stayed away. We're bound, he and I. We're inevitable. And despite the taboo, those binds between us don't feel like chains, but like a gift. Because how many people actually find the one person in all the universe with whom they can fully share themselves?
"Then sleep," he says as he sits on the edge of the bed beside me and strokes my hair. "I'm not going anywhere. Let me take care of you."
"Then do it. Take care of me." I take his hand and guide it beneath the sheet to my breast, then arch back against his palm. I want him so bad I am aching. And while I know that he feels like he needs to coddle me, right now I need more.
"Letting me sleep isn't helping me," I insist. "Letting me sleep is ignoring me. Dallas, please. Please," I repeat as I slowly guide his hand down over my ribs, my belly.
His eyes are on mine, all dark heat and wild desire. But there's something else, too. He's still holding back, still second-guessing what he thinks is best for me.
"This," I say as I spread my legs and guide him lower, trailing his fingers over my smooth pubic bone and then lower still to cup my sex. "Touch me," I say. "Fuck me," I beg.
Electricity shoot
s through me, and I quiver, closing my eyes as I arch up and manipulate his fingers to tease my clit.
"Oh, Christ, baby." His words are low and hard, almost a growl, and I know that I have him.
"Bye-bye sleep," I murmur as he eases two fingers inside me even as he bends forward to take my breast in his mouth.
He moves over me and lowers his mouth to my breast. His teeth graze my nipple, and I cry out, bucking against him as he nips and bites, then kisses his way down my body. He pauses at my pubic bone, then tilts his head up to look at me. "Is this what you want? My mouth on your pussy? My tongue teasing your clit while I thrust my fingers deep inside you?"
My body clenches in response to his words, and I manage a garbled sound that is reasonably close to a yes.
"I'm going to take you to the edge, baby. Right to the edge, but not over. Not yet."
I whimper, then almost beg, but his tongue flicking over my clit silences me, and I arch up, the pleasure almost too much to bear. But he won't let me escape any of the delights with which he torments me. Instead, he holds my hips firmly in place as his tongue works a wild magic on me. I'm close, so close, and my breath is shallow as I focus on that one spot, that one place where all the pleasure in the world seems to be trapped, and Dallas is so close to releasing it, and if he would just--
But then he stops, and I'm left on the precipice. I cry out in frustration, but as I do, he releases my hips and thrusts his fingers inside me. My body clenches around him and I almost cry with relief.
I need this so much. No, not this. Him. I've missed him. Hell, I've missed us. And the feeling of him inside me is like coming home. "More," I whisper. "Dallas, please, more. Everything. You."
I'm not even coherent, but I know he understands.
Even so, he backs away from me, and I'm about to call him every dirty name I know, when I realize that he's not leaving. On the contrary, he's stripping, peeling off the damp jeans and then tossing his shirt across the room. He stands there for a moment, naked and perfect, his cock hard and ready. Just seeing him makes my body respond, my pussy clenching in anticipation of him filling me. He's mine. And right now, I want him inside me.
More than that, I want it hard. Fast. I want the wildness of being claimed. The surrender of being filled. And I'm completely shameless when I beg him, "Please, please, please, just fuck me." The words rush out of me without thought, and it's only after their echo has lingered that I think how wonderful it is that I can make that demand. For so long, Dallas hadn't been able to penetrate a woman, and I'd feared I'd never feel him inside me again.
