"I'm sorry, Liesel," he whispered after a moment, his own voice strained. A sob broke forth from her chest, as his touch had sent her head spinning in more ways than one.
"How long have you known?" she demanded tearfully, staring only at the ground. "I just need to know the truth."
"My father called me one night when I was fourteen." Kurt's voice was husky as he stood. "My mother pleaded with him to let me be, but he said if I was ever to be the pack leader, I would need to know what to do one day when the need arose." Liesel couldn't help but wonder if his next need would be for himself or his son after him.
"He sent his youngest brother, my Uncle Egon, to do it, but we were to watch from a distance. I was excited to be going with the men. I wasn't old enough to turn, so it was a privilege to be out so late at night." Kurt sat on the ground a ways away from where Liesel knelt.
"I was enjoying myself until I saw the look in your eyes. You were terrified," His voice grew quiet. "The next day was even worse, when I realized that the same deed had been done to my mother. I felt sick to my stomach for days after that. I think that's when I truly began to grow up. I'd once longed to turn sixteen, but no more.
"My father made it clear, however, that without a Pure Blood, I and all the others would lose what precious little humanity we did have. And without that humanity, there was a very good chance that I could choose to spare you one day to accidentally kill you the next." Liesel finally looked up at him, tears still sticking to her eyelashes and making his figure blurry.
"If you knew all of this, why did you promise me we could leave together one day?" She felt rather silly for asking. It seemed foolish that she had held on to a promise made so young. But if Liesel was honest with herself, the hope she had put into that promise had been the fire that had driven her on for so long. It had become her anchor every time her life became a storm.
"It was a boy's hope," he said quietly.
"Would you go if you could?"
"I'm afraid I cannot afford to dwell on such thoughts anymore. I have others to care for."
13. ON ONE CONDITION
The dress was old, possibly as old as the curtains in the bedroom. That it had been altered repeatedly was obvious, as the white lace was worn far more at the hems than the rest of the raiment. Still, the basic shape was becoming, as the seamstress was skilled. Liesel was silent as the woman finished her fitting. The two women had hardly spoken a word since Kurt had dropped her off. The seamstress had a kind smile, but Liesel couldn't bring herself to make small talk today.
"When she's finished, you may walk around the town a bit," Kurt had told her. "My family knows you like to explore. I've told them to leave you be." Of course, what he was really telling her was not to run away. Liesel set her jaw stubbornly. Would this really be her whole life? Perhaps it wasn't heartbreak the Pure Bloods died of, but rather boredom.
"You couldn't wed a better man," the seamstress said sympathetically. But Liesel pouted.
"A good man wouldn't have lied to me."
"That was wasn't by his choosing," the woman mumbled, her mouth filled with pins. She took them out and paused in her work to look right at Liesel. "His father forbade him from telling you. The boy was so taken with you from the start that Old Garrit knew he'd fare better giving Kurt guidelines to follow instead of trying to separate you two completely." The seamstress nodded to herself and went back to pinning. "Things really couldn't have turned out better." Liesel looked at her incredulously.
"Couldn't have turned out better?" She echoed in disbelief. "My father was tricked into leaving our home. I watched both my parents die. Now I will never leave this wretched forest again! How is that in any way desirable?"
"Old Garrit could have laid claim to you," the woman said matter-of-factly. Liesel felt the color drain from her face. The seamstress continued talking matter-of-factly on as she worked. "Most pack leaders marry again and again until they die. So don't you go thinking this pack leader has no feelings. Garrit's a tough old thing, but he loves his son. When he realized Kurt was sneaking off every day to see you, he told Kurt's mother that you would be Kurt's and no one else's." The seamstress looked a bit smug, nodding again to herself. "I know because she told me. Good friends we were, despite her being Pure Blood and all. And there," she turned Liesel before the mirror. "This will be all done tomorrow. You'll be a lovely bride."
Liesel wanted to cry as she looked in the mirror. Dressed in an ancient shabby lace gown without any family or friends was hardly her idea of a lovely wedding. Instead of crying, however, she decided to force another question in an attempt to steady her voice as the woman helped her carefully out of the clothes and back into her own.
"Why is everyone so quiet here?" Even in Ward, the people had laughed and talked when she wasn't near. But here she noticed that there was very little conversation going on...anywhere. Only the children seemed to remember how to speak. And the seamstress, of course.
"That would be the magic," the woman gently laid the gown back on her work table. Liesel looked at her, confused. The woman sighed. "When we're born, we are very much human. As Kurt, I'm sure, has told you though, we begin turning at sixteen. Fear is what turns us. You learn quickly, however, that the human heart fears much. You eventually realize you can't live your life that way, constantly letting the wolf rise up. People get hurt, and you start to lose your mind. So we simply work to stop turning. With every choice, however, we give a bit of humanity to the wolf. We might keep our human form, but a piece of us dies. As we feed more and more of ourselves to the wolf, we lose the words that were once within our minds. Some of us have more words than others. Take me for example." She gave a sad chuckle then sighed. "But even I've begun to find moments, spells of time when the words don't come because the wolf doesn't have any to give. I fear if I live long enough, there will be a day when even I speak my last." The seamstress's words painted a haunting picture. Liesel quietly thanked her, more for the conversation than the dress, before leaving.
It wasn't until Liesel stepped out into the street that she realized she had nowhere to go. Though she'd craved freedom since arriving, the looks the townspeople threw her were almost more depressing than she could bear. Despairing eyes were everywhere with not a smile to be seen. Suddenly, she wanted very much just to go hide in the bedroom with the lace curtains and read her book. Out here she felt exposed, especially as barks and snarls could be heard scattered throughout the town. She did not have to stand there for long, however, as a girl with light brown hair rushed up to her and grabbed her by the arm.
"Let's go," she whispered excitedly before yanking Liesel down the street behind her.
"Where are we going?" Liesel had to work to keep from tripping and getting dragged along the ground. The girl didn't answer though. Instead, she suddenly stopped and whirled around.
"You can leave us alone now, Keegan! I can handle her for a few minutes," she scowled. Liesel couldn't help but feel a little unnerved. Kurt's brother had been following her? Keegan seemed to appear out of nowhere, but Liesel could see now that he'd been hunching to blend in with the street crowd.
"You might let her go," he frowned back. The girl huffed.
"Really, Kee, do you think me so daft? You have no business watching women relieve themselves in the woods." At those words, Liesel was grateful. She really had needed to go since arriving at the seamstress's cottage. "Besides," the girl added, "I'm fifteen, and more than old enough to know what happens if I lose her." Keegan stood uncertainly for a moment before nodding once.
"Fine. But I'll be checking on you." The girl stuck her tongue out at him before flipping back around and breaking into a run. As she still had a good grip on Liesel's wrist, it was all Liesel could do to stay upright as they ran. The girl was strong and quick. It wasn't long before they were out of the town and in a part of the forest Liesel had never seen before. Though there was still no sun, it was a little brighter here. When the girl released Liesel, she realized that they could see the c
abin and most of the town from the little hill they'd just climbed. Gigantic cone-laden trees still towered above them, but there was less brush, making it easier to see the town as a whole.
In truth, the little hill would have been lovely, had it been discovered under different circumstances. Purple dew-laced flowers carpeted the ground and even the bases of the tree trunks. Various boulders and stumps provided places to sit, but not enough for the space to appear crowded. As Liesel wondered at the tranquil scene, the girl said nonchalantly,
"If you truly do need to relieve yourself, I would do it now. I'm not sure how long Kee will be able to contain himself." As confused as Liesel still was, she hastened to do as the girl advised. When she returned, the girl was examining a tear in her skirt, muttering under her breath, something about how the seamstress would have her hide this time. "Finally," she glanced at Liesel, then returned to her torn dress. "I was starting to think you'd run, and I would have to hunt you down." Liesel's expression must have betrayed her, because the girl laughed and rolled her eyes. "It was a joke. Now, on to more important matters. Do you love my brother?" Liesel stared back, trying to figure out who her brother might be.
"I'm sorry, but who is-"
"Oh, right. I forgot. I'm Lora, Kurt's younger sister." As soon as she said it, Liesel could see Kurt's golden-brown eyes in the girl's face. They didn't look greatly alike, but she was very pretty, despite favoring her father. "So, do you love him?" she asked again.
"I...don't know," Liesel faltered. And in truth, she didn't. Lora studied her for a moment before finally nodding.
"I think you do." Liesel wasn't sure how qualified the girl was for making such judgements, but she held her tongue. It wouldn't do to offend her. "This is for you," Lora shoved a parchment at her that was sealed in blue wax. Liesel's own name was written in a lovely script on the front. Liesel looked at Lora quizzically, but Lora just shook her head. "I didn't write it. But I can tell you that it's going to help you break the spell." Liesel frowned.
"This spell has been active for two hundred years. Why should I suddenly have the answer?"
"Because you want it more. No other Pure Blood has ever loved the pack leader the way you do." She climbed up on a round boulder and stared down at the town, her voice resentful. "Kurt used to believe. But Father drove that from him as fast as he could." The way the girl sounded made it seem as if she knew everything about their unusual relationship, as if theirs was a lovely tale for children at bedtime.
"But what can I do?" Liesel looked up at her incredulously. The girl returned her gaze, the determination suddenly returning to her face.
"We are stuck here. But you can leave."
"I can?"
"It's in the letter." She hopped down and began to walk back the way they'd come. "Supper is in two hours back at the cabin. If you don't show, Keegan is going to eat me alive."
Liesel stared at the letter for a long time without opening it. So many times, she had come close to escaping. She didn't know if her heart could take another fall. If there was even a hint, an aroma of hope, and she took the leap, she could still fail.
And if he found her trying to escape, what would Kurt say, even if it was for the pack's good? Would he believe her or resent her forever? She was tempted to simply refuse. At least for now, her intended had some sort of affection for her.
And yet, a memory flitted through her mind. A boy and a girl, bent over a book, plotting the twists and turns of their one-day adventure. How sweet the air had seemed those days. The world had been theirs. They only needed wait a few years before gaining the freedom to chase their dreams. A part of her, an irrational part, still dreamed as that girl had. She still imagined the boy holding her close as they set off on their travels. She could almost sense his warmth beside her as she closed her eyes each night, whether under stars or roof. She could almost feel his lips caressing her own, smiling beneath hers as they watched the sun set over the ocean. With shaking hands, she broke the seal.
Dear Liesel,
I knew who you were the moment I saw you, and in that moment, my heart both mourned and rejoiced. I mourned because I knew what they were taking from you. I rejoiced because I knew you would bring much happiness to my son. The Maker knows he needs it.
Kurt has told me you're losing your grandparents. I was seventeen when I was marked for Garrit, though I wasn't called back until I was nineteen. The pack does it that way, marking girls long before they need them. It's easier then if the current Pure Blood dies suddenly, the next one is nearby. It sounds cruel, but I suppose it makes sense.
I have instructed Lora to deliver this note to you before you wed my son because what I have discovered is of the utmost importance. Unfortunately, I learned too late, but the moment I saw you, I knew you could be the one to break the spell. You have life in you still. It hasn't been beaten out of you like it has so many of the girls by the time they're brought here. (At least, that's what I've been told.)
I'm writing this now because I can sense the life within me draining. My husband would deny it, but the pack unwittingly draws life from the Pure Blood. There's nothing in the legends that says so, but I can feel it. The world has lost its color, and I can no longer taste the sweetness of honey. I pray to the Maker that this slow death is never yours, nor does it fall on any other woman. If you can stop the spell, it won't.
As I said, from the time I die, the pack has thirty days to carry on without a wedded Pure Blood. Tradition gives them four days before a new one is joined, three for mourning, and one for a wedding. You must leave before you are married, for if you leave after you are wed, the people will be lost. Your only hope of this is to convince Kurt to let you go. Because of his place in line, he has the authority to suspend the magic and let you go, just as he had the authority to call you. But this must all be done before my husband realizes you are out of the forest. Even with Kurt's blessing, you cannot escape Garrit's summoning while still within the bounds of the woods. If you can escape those, however, you're free.
Once you are out, you will have no more than twenty-six days to find the way to break the curse and return. Sadly, I cannot tell you where to find that. A fairy, perhaps, or a wizard could help. I can only hope someone shall know.
I have told you this in the absolute faith that you care for Kurt. I could see it in your eyes the day he found you near our home. If you decide to run, or are too late to return, everyone here will lose what humanity they have left forever. So consider your choices wisely.
Tell my Kurt that I love him. Although I was taken against my will, I have no regrets, except that I couldn't save them myself. The Maker has given me three beautiful children, and I would not trade them for the world. And don't be too hard on Garrit. He is gruff and obstinate, but he means well. My husband was actually much like Kurt as a young man, and he wasn't always the way he is now. Over the years, he's given much of himself to the wolf to keep order in the town. With each piece he sacrifices for others, he loses a bit of himself. He's a good man, and like Kurt, never had a choice in what happened two hundred years ago. They're as much prisoners in this forest as we are. They cannot leave, and they cannot let their people die. Please be the one who breaks this cycle of evil for all our sakes.
Sincerely,
Wanda
Liesel's heart hammered within her as she folded the letter back up, afraid to read its contents again. And yet, hope had already sprung up within her. Breaking it out once more, she memorized the lines. That the spell could be broken she had no doubt. As to how that could be done in only twenty-six days was another matter entirely. The suggestion that she use the plan as a ruse to escape danced across her mind, but she knew she couldn't do that even before the thought was complete. As Kurt's mother had stated, it would be impossible to leave Steffen and his sister and grandfather and all the others to the spell's sentence. And Kurt. She couldn't do that to Kurt.
Was Lora right? Was she in love with Kurt?
Liesel had to wonder at her girlish
assumptions about the future. Though they had never discussed it, Liesel had always assumed they would marry. It would be the two them and the rest of the world. She would give him children, and they would be happy, just like her grandparents had been. How little she'd known when she'd dreamed up such ambitious plans. But somehow, she still wanted them. Despite all that had happened, she still wanted him.
But if they failed, if Kurt said no, or if she was just too tired to try, the outcome was simple. She would return and live out her short existence here, as Wanda had done. It would be the easy thing to do. She would only have to follow the rules. She could still be his wife and the mother of his children, and they would stay together until death did them part. In fact, the ease of simply doing as she was told was tempting. Liesel was tired of fighting. Would it be so bad to simply let the spell have her?
"Lora said I'd find you here," Kurt sat down on the stump next to hers. Liesel turned to tell him that she would do as he wanted. She would marry him. The pack would live. She was done fighting. As she looked into his eyes, however, something stopped her from uttering the words.
As she watched, a strange look came over his face. His eyes glazed over, and his jaw went slack.
"Kurt?" Liesel frowned and leaned a hair closer. When she got no response, she gingerly reached out and touched his shoulder. "Kurt, what's wrong?" Slowly, Kurt turned his head toward her, but his eyes were still vacant. It was the same look she'd seen on him that morning, when she had tried to ask about the early deaths of the pack wives. The emptiness in his eyes made him look...other, and it frightened her. What had happened to her friend while she was gone?
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