I can’t.
My body is frozen, and the darkness steals my breath.
Nate
“I swear to God, Zane, if he’s hurt her, I’m going to gut the bastard.”
“We tried to stop him, Nate, but it was no use. He pulled his gun on us. Told us to send you, and only you. We didn’t want to do anything to put Emily at risk.”
I shake my head, charging toward the bar. Clenching my fist, I swipe my arm across, letting out a growl as I do. I glance around, all eyes now on me.
“Where the fuck is he?” I yell.
“Who, man?” Chuck asks.
“Silver. He took the girl. Where the fuck is he?” My eyes are glancing between the guys and the half-naked women strewn across their laps.
“Haven’t seen him, brother,” Chuck replies, grabbing his bottle and tilting the beer into his mouth.
I hold up my hands. “Anyone else?” I roar, noticing the guys jerk at the harshness of my voice.
They all shake their heads, a few responding with a lackluster no. I turn on my heel, storming out of the room and through to the next door along—the kitchen. I push open the door, checking over my shoulder to see Zane and Jarvis following behind. “We got your back, man,” Jarvis whispers, nodding toward the door. I step through and see Silver with Emily on his lap.
“The fuck, man?” I say, my eyes wide and focused on the asshole holding Emily. Her face has paled, and she sits rigid, clearly scared by the crazy fucker holding her captive. “You heard what Prez said. She’s with me.”
“I didn’t hear shit,” he replies smugly. His fingers trail lightly over her naked shoulder. “Nice bit of ink, Nate. Knew you had to be good for something.”
“What are you playing at, Silver?”
“I wanted to see what all the fuss was about,” he says, cupping one of Emily’s bare breasts. “Pretty pair of tits your girl has got.”
“Where’s my father?” I ask, reaching inside of my jeans, pulling out my handgun. Gripping it tightly in my hand, I’m so tempted to take this fucker out.
Silver shrugs lightly, his eyes landing on the gun I hold in my hand. “What you planning on doing with that?” His voice is playful, and it's clear he’s goading me. Trying to work out whether I’ll aim it at him and pull the goddamn trigger.
“Let her go before I have to do something we’ll both regret.” My voice is calm now, even.
“You wouldn’t dare. You don’t have the guts. Fucking pussy!”
Lifting my hand, I aim at Silver. Squeezing the trigger, the shot rings out around the room. Emily screams and Silver lets out a yell, jumping to his feet. Emily tumbles to the floor and I drop to one knee to help her up.
“My shoulder,” Silver grumbles, dabbing his hand against the graze to the skin on his shoulder. I never aimed to hurt him, just give the asshole a warning.
“You okay?” I ask Emily as I pull her from the floor, holding her against me. I let go of her, slipping off my vest, I remove my t-shirt, quickly placing it over Emily’s head. Her body shakes as she crosses her arms over her chest.
I turn my attention back to Silver, guiding Emily behind me and out of harm's way.
“We take this to church. I want you stripped of that patch and I reckon the rest of the guys should vote on it. You’re not worthy of being VP for this club.” I walk over to him on the chair, pressing my gun against his bleeding shoulder.
“Your father will never go for that. We’re brothers and he has my fucking back.”
“And I’m his son,” I roar, pressing harder with the gun. “And there is only one of us with the club’s best interests at heart here, right?”
“I care about the club,” he replies.
“You only care about yourself. You’re a crazy motherfucker.”
He lifts his brow. “Yet you’re the one pointing the gun. Tut, tut, Nate. I’m not sure Daddy would approve.”
“Speaking of the prez,” I say, tipping my head. “Where the fuck is he?”
“Where the fuck do you think he is? He’s upstairs enjoying the free pussy.”
His eyes widen as he stamps his boots against the floor, jumping up to his feet. In one swift movement he pulls back his clenched fist and hits me hard in the stomach. I hunch my shoulders as the blow to my stomach winds me, lifting my gun and pointing it at the silver-haired fucker standing in front of me.
“Nate, shit…” Emily cries.
“Enough,” Jarvis bellows. “Save it for church.” He steps between us, putting a hand on our chests, pushing us apart a little.
Breathing heavily, I try to catch my breath. I turn to see Emily with her hand over her mouth, tears prickling at her eyes. I relax my arm but keep the gun in my hand. Taking a few steps back, I glare at Silver. “This ain’t over.”
“Oh look. The little pussy has grown some balls.”
“Screw you, Silver,” I spit back. Grabbing Emily’s arm, I lead her out of the room. Jarvis and Zane follow on, and I check over my shoulder, making sure that Silver doesn’t pull any shit now that my back is turned.
“Hey,” I whisper. “You okay?”
“I’m not safe here, am I?” She sniffles as tears roll down her face.
“We won’t let anything happen to you, Emily,” Zane interjects from over my shoulder.
“You just did, jackass.” I can’t help snap at him, although I know he probably didn’t have much of a chance against Silver.
“That’s uncalled for, man,” Jarvis says. “You’ve seen that psycho in action. We had no choice but to go along with it. He could’ve put a bullet in her goddamn skull.” He presses two fingers to the side of his head, tapping repeatedly, his eyes wide as he glares at me. But my attention is caught by Emily who taps her fingers lightly against my hand resting on her arm.
“I don’t want to be here,” she whispers through her sobs.
“I’ll take you to my room. We’ll talk there.” I take her by the arm and lead her through the hallway and toward the staircase. I can sense that she’s freaking out and I need to calm her down.
We get to my room and I dig into my jeans, retrieving the key. Unlocking the door, I hold it open for her to walk in. I reach inside, flicking the light switch, turning to look at the guys standing behind me.
“Okay, I’ll watch her,” I instruct with a nod. “We catch up tomorrow, yeah?”
“Where were you, bro?” Zane asks with narrowed eyes.
I peer around the guys, making sure the coast is clear. “It was Tara. She turned up and saw me with Emily. Got the wrong impression and raced off. I went after her.”
“Shit,” Zane says with a sigh, his hand resting on my shoulder. “So, you and this Tara chick, you’re, uh, still seeing each other?”
“Prez would kill me.”
“But you have feelings for her, don’t you?”
“None of that matters,” I dismiss quickly. “My father has decided to lay a claim on her, and right now, my main priority is keeping her away from here. Keeping her safe.”
With a light pat to the top of my arm, Zane looks at me with some strange sort of look in his eye. It’s like he pities me. “Let’s hope for your sake Prez doesn’t follow through on his claim. Shit could get ugly.”
“Man…” I sigh, shaking my head as I stare at the floor. “It’s fucked up. I want to fight for her, fuck, she belongs with me. I’m just not sure going to war with my father and my own brotherhood, is a fight I will ever be able to win.”
My admission is killing me.
“Between us,” he whispers, leaning in, “this brotherhood is struggling to support Prez and his crazy VP. He’s too erratic, Nate. Most of the guys fear for their lives. It’s fear that keeps him in a position of power and that ain’t what this club is about. It should be about trust and respect. And I’m afraid to say that Prez ain’t got that from us right now.”
“I hear you, man,” I reply, glancing to Emily sitting on the bed. Fuck, this is a mess.
“We’ll talk more tomorrow, ok
ay?” My eyes flit between the girl and the guys standing beside me. Holding out his hand, I take it, pulling him toward my chest. I pat him on the back. “Thanks for everything, man.”
“Anytime, bro. You need us, you know where to find us.”
Nodding, I step inside my room, watching as they walk away. Closing the door, I drop the lock and make my way over to my closet. I let my vest drop to the floor and grab a plain white t-shirt. Sliding it over my head, I head over to the side of my bed, reaching into the drawer and pulling out one of my prepay cell phones. I need to call Brax. I need to know that Tara is okay.
Walking around the bed, I drop down in front of Emily.
“I’m so sorry about what happened, Em.”
“It wasn’t your fault.” She pulls her legs up, resting her chin on her bended knee.
“He didn’t hurt you, did he?”
“No,” she responds quickly, shaking her head vehemently.
“I gotta make a call,” I say as I stand and walk over to the bathroom. I close the door and dial his number. There’s barely any dial tone before his voice booms down the receiver.
“Nate,” he rushes out. “Do you have her with you? Please, fuck, tell me she’s there.”
“She was,” I say blowing out a huge breath. My hand rests at the back of my neck and I squeeze over and over hoping it will help relieve some of the tension. “What the fuck is she playing at?”
“I don’t know, didn’t you bother to ask?”
“Fuck, Brax. You were supposed to keep her away from here. I have so much shit going on right now that I can’t be watching over my shoulder the whole time, wondering if she’ll show.”
“I’m sorry she ain’t your priority right now,” he snaps, twisting my words.
“Don’t give me that crap, Brax. This… everything I’m doing… it’s for her, for us.”
“So where is she?”
“She should be back with you by now,” I say, feeling deflated. I fucked up again.
“NO,” he yells down the phone, so much so I have to pull it away from my ear. “There’s no fucking sign of her, Nate.”
My throat dries and I drop my head back. “Shit,” I say with a groan. “She has to be at her apartment. You need to check there.”
“We checked, asshole. She ain’t there.”
“Fuck!” I roar, rearing back my clenched fist before slamming it against the door. “Where is she? Where the hell has she gone?”
“I got my men looking, but she isn’t answering her cell, and no one has seen her.”
Pacing back and forth, I wrack my mind trying to think of where she could be.
“What if she’s gone home?” I ask, suddenly realizing she might be there.
“I just told you we checked her apartment...”
“Not the apartment,” I blurt out, cutting him off. “I’m talking about her home. Her mom’s house.”
“Things aren’t great with her mom,” he’s quick to dismiss.
“But girls… don’t they always go running back to their moms when shit goes wrong? Worth a try, right?”
“I don’t know, Nate. I really don’t think she’ll be there.”
“Then where? Where else could she be?”
“Izzy found an empty bottle of bourbon in the room she’s staying in. She must be tanked.”
“Yeah, man. She was half-cut when I saw her.”
“What the fuck happened?” Brax asks.
“She walked in on me tattooing this new chick, Emily. I took her under my protection because believe me when I say she had no idea what she was getting herself into. She was dragged here with the new guy as a gift to Prez. But my father pushed me toward her at the initiation party tonight. She’s a nice girl, too nice to be a whore, but we made a plan, Brax. She agreed to work with me in return for protection. We'd act like we were together, hoping it would take the heat off me long enough to figure out a plan. A plan to get Tara back.”
“And then what?”
“Tara walked in on me and the girl. I’d just tattooed her, and she wasn’t wearing a top. She peered into the studio and saw. Ran off, jumping to the wrong conclusion.”
Brax sighs heavily down the phone. “You should’ve got my guy to bring her home. What the hell were you thinking?”
“She ran off, but I chased her down. Pulled her into the side of the road, only the guys started to shout for me. Some shit was going on inside and I was fearful for Emily’s life.”
“So you left her? Really, Nate?”
“I did what I thought was right,” I reply solemnly. But I didn’t believe my own words either. Looking back, I should have done more. “Silver had the girl. He’d taken her hostage.”
“You need to sort this bullshit out, Nate. It’s time to fucking step up and be what your club needs.”
“I know,” I say nodding in agreement. “Listen, I’m gonna check out her mom’s. See if she is there. If I don’t find her, I’ll sweep the area. Bars, motels, hospitals. I will find her, Brax. If it’s the last thing I do.
“Yeah, you better. I’ll make sure my guys search the area too. Let me know if you find her. Keep in touch.”
“I will, man,” I say before ending the call and pushing my cell back into my pocket with a sense of urgency. This is on me and I have to fix it. I have to find her. Grabbing the handle, I yank open the door and walk back into my room. Emily is curled up on the bed, her arms holding her knees to her chest.
“Hey,” I shout over to her and she turns slightly. She smiles, but it’s kind of sad. “I gotta go out, but I’m gonna get one of the men to come and stay here with you.”
She nods but doesn’t say a word.
“I know this has been shit for you, Emily. But it’s just how it is here. You gotta tough it out or get out. And when I mean get out, you go far, far away from here. Because my father will kill you if you ever run. They find you, you got a target on your back, baby.”
She sits bolt upright, her confliction evident in her eyes. “I have nowhere to go, Nate. No money. Nothing. Being here with you is the closest I’ve been to making friends in a long time. I’m scared and I never for one minute thought it would be this way but leaving now just doesn’t seem like an option.”
“So you’re staying?” I ask with a smile.
She nods once. “Toughin’ it out, right?”
“You sure?” I ask, worried about her sudden change of heart. I was sure she’d jump at the chance.
“Like I said, this may be shitty right now, but what’s waiting on the other side really isn’t any better.”
I look at the girl sitting up on my bed and feel sorry for her.
“You want to talk about what happened with Tara?” she asks, quickly changing the subject. “Was that who you just called?”
Pushing my hands in the pockets of my jeans, I drop back leaning against the wall. “She saw us. Got the wrong impression.”
“I guessed as much.”
“For her own safety I sent her away. The guys were shouting for me to help you and I was torn. I don’t regret helping you, not for a minute...” I pause, dragging my hands down my face. “But I let her go and now no one knows where she is. I fucked up big time, Emily.”
“Shit.” She exhales a huge breath. “This is partly my fault, isn’t it?”
“Shit, no. You didn’t ask to be dragged out by that asshole.”
“But still…”
“No,” I snap. “This ain’t your fault. This is me. All me. And now I have to rectify it. I need to search for her. I’m sending Davo up to stay with you…”
“What?” she screeches, cutting me off mid-sentence.
“Don’t panic,” I say, pushing myself away from the wall and stepping closer. I stop, just in front of her, squeezing her shoulder gently. “Davo is a good guy. I trust him completely and so should you.”
I watch as she swallows hard. “Okay.” She presses her lips together.
“I’ll be back as soon as I find her.”
&nb
sp; “And what if someone asks where you are? What should I tell them?”
“You say I went for a ride. Needed to clear my head after the shit that went down with Silver.”
“Right,” she says with a determined nod. “Got it, and…” she says meekly, as if speaking with caution. “What happens if you don’t find her, Nate? What then?”
My stomach churns at the thought. “I’m gonna fucking find her, make no mistake about that.” I shake my head, scratching my stubble before pulling out a cigarette which I place to my lips. Digging in my pocket, I retrieve the lighter and flick over and over until the flame flickers. I place it to the end of my cigarette, taking a long drag as the smoke fills the air around me. I hold out the packet to Emily and she stands up from the bed and reaches, pinching one between her thumb and forefinger. A smirk twitches at her lips as she snatches the cigarette placed loosely in my lips. Pressing them end to end, she puffs until her own is alight.
Handing me back the cigarette, she points her fingers at me. “Go get your girl, Nate.”
Pushing the cigarettes back in my pocket, I give her a firm nod. Inhaling deeply, I race around the room, grabbing everything I need. Grabbing my shoulder holster, I slide it on, loading up the 9mm, one in each holder. I have no idea where I’m going, or where I might end up, but I’m making sure I’m prepared. I grab my cut, sliding it over the top, before buckling my knife sheath to my waistband.
“Jesus,” Emily says, letting out an exaggerated breath. “You look like you’re going to war.”
“This is nothing,” I say with a shake of my head.
“Oh, sure it is,” she chuckles. “Two guns, a knife, I mean, everyone carries that much protection, right?” She takes a quick drag of her cigarette, pursing her lips together and slowly blowing out the smoke. I can’t help but laugh a little. This is just another reminder of how she is so unaware of what happens here.
“You’ll get used to seeing it. We all carry this much protection. Being who we are, it’s necessary, believe me.” I lift my brows and her eyes widen a little.
“Just stay safe, Nate,” she stresses, concern in her voice.
“You don’t need to worry about me. Here,” I say offering her the spare key for my room. “Lock the door and stay low until my return. If you need to go anywhere, take Davo with you. I don’t think Silver will try that shit again, but then no one ever quite knows what’s going through that sick head of his.”
The complete scars series: Books one-four Page 55
