by Oxford, Rain
“Why would you come to save me?” I asked. Even though I was Dylan’s friend, I didn’t think Divina particularly liked me enough to come into the spirit world to get me.
“Because Dylan is out there causing havoc trying to save you, and he would risk his life to get to you. I figured if I came and got you, then he would stop. There are some things more important than Dylan. Unfortunately, I don’t know what they are anymore. Say goodbye to your mother so we can get out of here.”
It was astonishing that a god understood the need to say goodbye to loved ones, but I wasn’t going to waste the opportunity. I hugged my mother for the last time and we both cried, then I hugged my sister.
“I can’t believe you are my sister.”
“I am just a memory now… but that is all I ever wanted to be; remembered. Now you know I existed. I made foolish choices and I hope you never make similar ones. Keep thinking and acting with your heart and you will be fine.”
* * *
The flash cut our goodbyes short and we landed in a dark, underground room with Dylan and Edward. “Here’s your stupid friend. Will you stop trying to tear yourself apart now?!” Divina demanded of my friend.
Dylan looked to be a little in shock. “Um, thank you for saving him, but…” He pointed to Edward. “Did you save him, too?” He definitely seemed confused, and I was completely lost.
When did Edward need saving?
“No, actually, I haven’t been saved, I am just on rent. It is nice to see you again, Divina. Always a welcome sight when I return from the grave,” he said.
Something was wrong; Edward didn’t talk like that.
Use your nose, Rojan advised.
I did, and realized what was off. That was definitely not Edward. He smelled similar, and he looked identical, but his scent was different. For that matter, Dylan looked nearly identical to Edward and this man.
This was Ronez… Dylan’s dead father.
“Please don’t flirt with my girlfriend, Dad. I think I need some water,” Dylan said. “Mordon, this is my father. I opened the void to try and find you and Ronez was standing there. I’m happy to see you three, honestly, I’m just a little overwhelmed.”
“You tried to open the void when you knew what could happen to you?” I asked. He nodded absentmindedly, swaying a little. I moved as if I were going to steady him, but instead slapped him as hard as I could on the cheek. He went down, but he deserved it. “You stupid idiot!” I yelled.
Dominant-protective tendencies, Rojan muttered to himself. Despite my best efforts to ignore his pain, I reached down and helped pull him back to his feet.
Divina snorted. “I agree with you. Maybe a few more beatings and he will stop being so stupid all of the time,” she said.
“Divina,” Ronez admonished. “Men do not like to be bullied by their women. You should be nicer to him because he’s the man and you are just the little lady.”
“I never really liked you,” she taunted, glaring at him.
“I guess those were pity kisses then? That’s fine with me. You should pity me more; I’m dead. That’s pretty pitiful. Kisses?”
“That is not exactly attractive.”
“Please stop. My girlfriend and my dad… No amount of therapy would make this all better.”
“I’m sorry, son. It’s genetic; no woman can resist me. I passed it down to you, so you should be pleased.” Ronez was much more playful than Edward, a lot more like Dylan. Apparently, Dylan had his father’s personality minus the philandering.
“If Divina didn’t save you, how are you here?”
“Kiro made a deal with the demon guard. Janus, a demon himself, is precarious to deal with, but the two of them have a standing, uneasy alliance. Unfortunately, Janus and the void itself suffered from the damage of time, so I ended up kind of late. I was supposed to arrive the same day Kiro ordered me.”
“Don’t trust Void-Express one-day,” Dylan said.
That made no sense at all to me, so I assumed it was a human reference.
Dylan sat cross-legged on the ground. If it looked more like he collapsed in shock and exhaustion, no one said it. Never tell a madwoman she was crazy, and never tell Dylan he was tired.
“Do you have to heal this world now? Can’t you come back later?” I asked.
He opened one eye to look at me, as if he were concentrating with the other. “I can’t allow people to suffer and die so that I can take a nap. Besides, I’m halfway done already.”
“What do you mean?” I asked. I shifted my eyes to see the tears and gashes in the universe healing at an alarming rate. Something had happened for my friend to have grown this powerful. Of course, I had no idea how long I had been away.
The magic passed through me without pause, which was odd. I figured with everything I went through, there would be some damage on me like there had been on Shiloh, but it appeared not. Within another minute, the world was as it should be and there was no sign of damage. Dylan’s magic was gentle and controlled as it dispersed and he stood with no signs of overexertion. I felt happy for my friend that he had accepted his magic, just like I had accepted Rojan.
Divina’s expression was schooled, but I could scent her worry for him. As that was the last thing Dylan wanted, I hoped she kept her feelings hidden. Ronez’s intentions were more difficult to read, as they appeared to be quite a bit shallower. Or perhaps that was a distraction.
“Can we all go home now so I can take a nap or something?”
“Dylan, you must never let your lady know you are lacking stamina. Fight through it.”
“Shut up, Dad.”
“That’s my boy. I told you I would be back to haunt you again. Let’s go see my brother. I bet I scare the piss out of him.” He looked positively gleeful at the prospect as the room filled with light, then cleared and left us in Dylan’s cabin. Edward was on the floor, playing blocks with Sammy.
“Mama!” Sammy screamed, jumping up and running into my arms.
“Dylan? Are you okay?” Edward asked, staring at his brother as if the man would disappear.
“I’m fine. Ronez said you brought him here.”
“I made a deal with Janus so that he can help you. I just didn’t actually think I would see my brother again.”
Ronez’s playfulness dropped like a rock in water. “I’m sorry about the way things were between us. I couldn’t talk about---”
He was interrupted as Edward hugged him. They were completely identical by sight, but their personalities and scents were different. Edward let him go and patted his shoulders. “How are you solid? I thought you would be…”
“I am essentially a demon. This body is as synthetic as Divina’s. I mean, demons are a species while I am a soul, so I could never be a demon, but my body is designed the same as a demon’s.”
“Then you can stay?” Dylan asked, hopeful.
Ronez smiled sadly. “I am the previous Guardian of Earth. It would be unnatural for us both to live, and the universe needs balance now more than ever.”
“What if I gave up being a Guardian? You could go back to being a Guardian and---” Dylan started. Divina cut him off by putting her hand over his mouth.
“You will always be the Guardian of Earth. It was what you were born to be, just like you were meant to be with Divina,” Ronez insisted. “I was just keeping her warm for---” Divina slapped her other hand over his mouth to shut him up.
“What a family. Sammy, don’t grow up to be like anyone in this room, okay?” I told the baby. He giggled and buried his face in my shoulder.
Divina removed her hand from Dylan’s mouth and he took her arm, dragging her off to the bedroom. Edward sighed. “I’m sure he’s thanking her for saving you,” he told me. “We should go outside.”
“I really hope he’s not thinking of me right now.”
We all went outside and Edward cooked dinner. After the first good meal in days, the sun was getting low and I was ready to go to bed, even if it was just to rest in peace.
When Dylan and Divina came out, they both looked disheveled, but didn’t smell of sex. Divina sat beside me, discreetly adjusting her skirt, and took Sammy from my arms. She certainly looked more natural with the baby than before. Dylan didn’t sit down; instead, he grabbed my arm and pulled me from the log.
“We need to talk,” he said.
“Oh, no thanks,” I said.
He rolled his eyes as he dragged me back to the cabin, then finally let me go to fall into one of the chairs at the table. “What happened in there?” he asked. “When you were pulled into the void, I thought you were dead.”
I shrugged. “I’m not sure if I was or not. All I know is that I found out a lot about myself.” I explained everything that happened since I went into the void. When I was done, he was staring at me.
“Are you okay?” he asked finally.
I shrugged. “I’m not really sure. I should be happy that I met my mother and sad that it was for so short, and miserable and guilty about all of the people who suffered… but all I can feel is… I don’t even know. I really feel nothing.”
Your friend is knowledgeable in psychology, yes? Ask him what that is called.
I do not want Dylan to diagnose me with anything, I insisted.
“You need to sleep and process things.”
Great. So he skipped right to the prescription. “I can’t sleep.” I tried not to sound like a temperamental four-year old when I said it, but I could only hope my friend understood. “I want to sleep, but I’m wound up.”
He leaned forward and pressed his hand against my forehead. “Sleep,” he said calmly. Lethargy overtook me and I felt Dylan catch me before I hit the floor.
* * *
Over the next few days, Dylan woke me up to eat and bathe and made me read a book, insisting that it would help me to have a break. I also played with Sammy. In that time, I worked through what happened, but I never really had an epiphany. Rojan and Dylan told me repeatedly that the world was better off with me in it. Mostly, I wanted to help Dylan finish healing the universe and get on with life. Whether or not it was right that I was here and so many others were dead, all I could do was make good use of my life. The best way to do that was to help Dylan.
Ronez was fun to visit with, but I hardly saw Dylan or Edward; they were both taking the opportunity to be with him. I would have been okay, but Divina must have been feeling left out because she took care of Sammy more than I did. I was tired of being alone with my thoughts.
“You said you had no motherly instincts,” I said one night as Sammy ate berries in her lap while we were all sitting by the fire. I had wanted to put Sammy to bed, but Divina insisted he stay up longer, since he had apparently taken a nap earlier.
She shrugged. “Maybe it’s a learned talent.”
“Good thing you are getting the lessons then,” Rojan said. I hadn’t realized he was about to say something, so I didn’t think to stop him.
Divina froze and looked at me. “What are you talking about?”
Rojan grinned, but I didn’t let it out. Instead, I shrugged. “That wasn’t me. Rojan must be bothered by something.” I turned my attention to Dylan and Ronez, who were having a heated argument about who the best Doctor Who was.
“Tom Baker was born to be the Doctor. All of the others based their acting on him,” Ronez insisted.
“You haven’t even seen Matt Smith! You don’t know the Doctor until you’ve seen Matt Smith!”
Edward put his face in his hands. “Divina, cover your eyes, you shouldn’t see me strangle your mate and ex-Guardian.”
“Strangle Ronez, but leave my mate alone,” she said. Sammy giggled.
“Cut me a little slack here, I died to protect Earth. Do you know how many of my favorite shows I missed?” Ronez asked.
Dylan rolled his eyes. “Ungrateful dead,” he muttered.
“What?” Ronez narrowed his eyes at his son.
“I said, ‘glad you’re not dead.’ You know, that you’re back. I’m glad you’re back.”
I thought it was nice that Ronez and Dylan were bickering like they were; it made things feel settled. Still, I could smell that something was bothering Edward. I had learned that I could rarely comprehend Ronez’s intentions, probably because he was dead. The problem was between Edward and Dylan; they were both being cautious around each other.
Let me talk to Ronez and Kiro, Rojan said.
I shrugged. If Rojan had something to say, who was I to keep him quite? I asked Ronez and Edward for a moment and they both followed me into the cabin. Dylan gave me a look before I closed the door, but he trusted me.
Rojan’s presence took control of my body flawlessly. I could have been worried that he had always had this power over me, but he was my dragon, a part of me, and the one who gave up his life so I could have one. I could give him nothing less than my full trust.
“Dylan is much younger than both of you, but about the same age as Mordon,” Rojan began to speak with a strong tone and no preamble. This strategic approach was well-known to both of us to display competence and obtain attention. “Therefore, he has confided many of his worries and thoughts in his friend. I am telling you this for the emotional well-being of Mordon’s friend.”
“He’s upset about my pig-headed brother, isn’t he?” Ronez asked, shooting a glare at his identical twin.
Edward glared back, but didn’t respond. Good… He was reasonable for now.
“Ronez, I can see that Dylan likes you very much, but he calls you by your name. When he is unsure of something, he looks to Kiro, not you. He consciously thinks of you as his father, but not subconsciously.” Rojan’s tone was gentler than before, but Ronez still looked like he was slapped. “You have my sympathies, but not my sorrow, for your stay is temporary. With his deep affection for you, it will be distressful enough for him when you must leave; do not wish more upon him.
“Kiro, you are another matter. The man Mordon knows has grown leaps and bounds with your help. Dylan grew up in a world that never cared about him. His mother barely tolerated him, and his only experiences with father figures were abusive. He learned to rely on himself, to never look to a father as a role model. You have broken down those preconceived notions, those learned fears, but your past has replaced those fears with new ones. He believes you hated your children, and that you would hate him by association. He fears that the closer he is to you, the closer you are to kicking him out.”
“I would never kick him out! None of my children have ever liked me and I never wanted Dylan to have the same---”
“You are such an idiot,” Ronez interrupted him. When Edward glared at him, he didn’t give his brother the chance. “You gave up on your kids. You always wanted it to be easy. Family is difficult. It’s demanding, stressful, and completely disastrous sometimes. You make mistakes, they make mistakes, and at the end of the day, everyone says they’re sorry and they move on. You never gave them the chance to apologize, and you never moved on. Dylan is the best son you could ever have and you are going to ruin it because he is everything you ever wanted in a child!”
“I don’t want him to leave, but soon he will leave to live his own life and I don’t want to get in his way.”
When Ronez opened his mouth, Rojan raised his hand calmly to halt the Guardian. Ronez closed his mouth, probably in shock. I doubt anyone else was brave enough to silence the man.
“I was a father once, Kiro. I may not have been the best, but I can tell you that I was loved by my children. It was not that they told me they loved me, or that they always obeyed. You have to know your children better than they know themselves to truly understand their feelings. Very often, they do not comprehend what they feel. However, Dylan is not a child, and he knows exactly what he feels. What he does not know is how you feel.
“Yes, he will soon go and live with his mate, but if you do not turn him away, he will still look to you for guidance. He will always look to you as a father, whether it is with the love and respect you have al
ways wanted from your children, or the aggressive, obligated disfavor as Mordon feels for his father. Talk to him, because he has too much to lose to come to you. He has only ever known the rejection of a parent, so you will have to give in first. Show him what a parent is supposed to be. Show him that he can rely on you to be honest with him. Do not let fear ruin your relationship.”
When they both stared at us, a million questions crossing their faces, Rojan waited patiently. Oddly enough, I believe he was trying to model the role of a parent.
Finally, Edward asked the question they were both burning with. “How old are you?”
Rojan smiled. “I was alive when the books had not yet been created. I flew in skies crowded with dragons, when the gates to the worlds were open and we could all travel freely between worlds.”
“You are older than us,” Ronez said in awe.
“Quite a lot older, yes. So heed the wisdom of my years and sorrows. There is nothing more important than family.” Blood or not blood. Rojan told me, giving me back the control. It was a little awkward standing before the two of them, so I just turned and walked back out to the campfire.
“Not now,” I told Dylan silently when it looked like he really wanted to question me. “So what is the game plan?” I asked as the twin Guardians rejoined the group. “Where do we go? What do we do?”
“Dylan has healed enough that the universe is stitching itself back together nicely. The ripples that caused the damage in the first place have stopped. All we need to do now is deal with the beast. Unfortunately, the Ancient keeps getting more powerful,” Divina said.
“The demon is still after Sammy. Even when we got him to Dios, the demon was still after him. Of all the children on all the worlds, why Sammy?” Dylan asked her.
She sighed and Rojan growled; she knew why and had been keeping it secret. I should have predicted that Dylan would figure it out.
“When Mordon was pulled into the void, you said no one would remember him. Edward forgot, but you and I remembered because of the Iadnah energy. You said we saw the universe differently.” He was confrontational now. She nodded. “But Sammy cried.”
