by K. K. Allen
Rose will have the cops out looking for me if I miss dinner. I scramble to my feet and brush the rock residue from my bottom.
It takes me just a few minutes to walk back down the rock pathway that empties into the deserted community beach. The Florida heat thaws away my anxiety as I head to the house.
The houses to the left of me come into view and I can’t help but compare them to Rose’s estate. I am not surprised to see that they are all almost the same size, possibly built by the same person. The next house that I pass is the one that caught my eye earlier. My eyes sweep over this estate again quickly but stop when I catch his eye. A guy, about my age, is leaning over his balcony staring down at me – or at least it appears that way. His hands are clasped together, an intense look on his face.
It hits me like lightning – so hard and fast that I’m falling to my knees. Jolts of pressure are stabbing me behind my eyes. The palms of my hands press against my ears. My mouth opens as if to scream, but no sound comes out. The pain is excruciating. A flash of bright white light takes over my vision, and then another, and another, and another. I don’t know how many times it hits me but each flash feels like a jab of electricity. After what seems like forever, the light sticks. The solid white light is accompanied by an overwhelming peace that makes up for all of the jolts that just entered my brain. I am sinking.
What I see now makes no sense but it’s as clear as the sun that’s setting over the Bay. In my vision I’m in the great room with Rose and Charlotte. Balloons decorate the room brilliantly, a few dozen hanging in mid-air, as if levitating. A three-tiered birthday cake sits in front of me displaying white frosting with green trim. It reads “Happy 16th Birthday, Katrina” in gold lettering. Gold decorative leaves are scattered on the second layer. It is the most beautiful cake I’ve ever seen. I am on the couch across from my grandmother who sits in her oversized chair. Charlotte stands at the window, smiling. It’s like a scene from a movie, as my life plays out before me. Rose pulls out a rectangular object, wrapped in silver and gold paper. She hands it to me. My vision jolts forward to my small fingers opening the jewelry box. And then there is a close up of the gift inside. A necklace with a stunning green stone attached sits in the palm of my hand. The next vision is of an overly joyous me wearing the necklace – and then it’s gone.
I’m knocked out of whatever vision my mind forced me to have and I’m back on the beach. I squeeze my eyes shut tighter, suffocating the pain I once felt. My breathing is rapid as I try to get ahold of reality.
What just happened?
I remember feeling pain but now all I feel is – alive.
“Hey!” A voice is shouting at me. “Hey, are you okay?” A figure drops down beside me in the sand.
It takes me a few seconds to adjust back to the present time. What was that? I ask myself this again and as I do my heart begins to race inside my chest. Suddenly, I go from electric – to terrified. I think back to that dream I had the first night in the estate, and now this – a vision that felt as if I was there. Why am I seeing these things?
“Can you hear me? Talk to me.”
The panic in the stranger’s voice shakes me enough to look up. Confused as to why this person is here with me now, I focus. My eyes are still closed.
Slowly, I open them but all I see is a blurry dark shadow. As my eyes adjust to the new image before me, the shadow fades to normal and I see him. A boy, my age I guess. Concern floods his face as he stares down at me.
“Thank you.” As soon as the words come out of my mouth I wake up completely. I try to sit up but dizziness overtakes me and I’m falling into a set of arms.
I focus in on the face above me. His hazel green eyes, even in the growing darkness, are clear. His short wavy hair is a dark shade of brown. His face chiseled and unspoiled. The touch of his arms burns through me. I’ve stared at him too long.
“Hey.” His voice is lighter now as he realizes I’m okay.
“I – I’m sorry, I don’t know what happened to me.” I find my voice, and when I do I’m shocked at how put together I sound. I’m seeing things, feeling electric shocks through my body, and now I’m calm? Impossible.
I’m able to sit up now so he helps me and then sits with me. I watch him search my body for damage. I scoot inches away. When his eyes fall back on mine I find comfort in them immediately. Who is this guy?
“I was at my balcony when I saw you fall.” He explains. “You looked like you were in pain. I just wanted to make sure you were okay. Are you okay?” His voice is gentle; I can’t help but notice it. And his eyes – there’s something about them.
I make the connection now as I look up to the balcony. “I remember seeing you there. That’s when it happened.”
“What happened?”
“The – headache.” I don’t know why I’m choosing to be vague right now but it’s like the right thing to do. “It hit me out of nowhere. And then I fell. And it just seemed to – linger.”
The boy nods, seeming to accept my story. “Maybe I should take you to the hospital. I don’t think those kind of headaches are normal.”
I edge myself away from him and shake my head. “Thank you but I’ll be fine. I feel fine now.” I stand effortlessly to prove it.
He looks unsure with my decision but rises with me. “Can I at least walk you back to where you came from? Where did you come from?”
What a strange question. “I’m just next door, almost there.” My eyes move towards Rose’s estate. “I’ll be okay, I promise.”
“You’re Rose’s granddaughter.” His voice changes but I can’t make out the tone. He’s confident in his assumption. And disapproving? I shake the thought away – now is not the time to try to understand anything.
I nod my head. “Yes.” I turn away slightly, but sneak a look at him from under my eyelashes. “I should go.”
I turn toward the place I’m forced to call home before he can argue and disappear from his sight.
Maybe I was slightly rude to just take off like that, but this situation is much too strange to explain to a complete stranger – a stranger whose name I didn’t even ask. But it didn’t matter. Something told me I would be seeing him again soon.
I’m able to sit up now so he helps me and then sits with me. I watch him search my body for damage. I scoot inches away. When his eyes fall back on mine I find comfort in them immediately. Who is this guy?
“I was at my balcony when I saw you fall.” He explains. “You looked like you were in pain. I just wanted to make sure you were okay. Are you okay?” His voice is gentle; I can’t help but notice it. And his eyes – there’s something about them.
I make the connection now as I look up to the balcony. “I remember seeing you there. That’s when it happened.”
“What happened?”
“The – headache.” I don’t know why I’m choosing to be vague right now but it’s like the right thing to do. “It hit me out of nowhere. And then I fell. And it just seemed to – linger.”
The boy nods, seeming to accept my story. “Maybe I should take you to the hospital. I don’t think those kind of headaches are normal.”
I edge myself away from him and shake my head. “Thank you but I’ll be fine. I feel fine now.” I stand effortlessly to prove it.
He looks unsure with my decision but rises with me. “Can I at least walk you back to where you came from? Where did you come from?”
What a strange question. “I’m just next door, almost there.” My eyes move towards Rose’s estate. “I’ll be okay, I promise.”
“You’re Rose’s granddaughter.” His voice changes but I can’t make out the tone. He’s confident in his assumption. And disapproving? I shake the thought away – now is not the time to try to understand anything.
I nod my head. “Yes.” I turn away slightly, but sneak a look at him from under my eyelashes. “I should go.”
I turn toward the place I’m forced to call home before he can argue and disappear from his sight.
<
br /> Maybe I was slightly rude to just take off like that, but this situation is much too strange to explain to a complete stranger – a stranger whose name I didn’t even ask. But it didn’t matter. Something told me I would be seeing him again soon.
Chapter Three
Night passes without another vision or dream to wake me in a cold sweat. A disturbing thought. In my exhaustion from recent events I expected the dreams to come. In a strange way, I wanted the dreams to come. I thought if they came to me I could begin to understand them. What struck me the most in both my vision on the beach and nightmare in front of my vanity mirror, was my appearance. The girl in the mirror looked like me, but different. Like a porcelain doll, with my skin so clear, eyes so bright and hair so perfectly placed around my face. And the necklace – I don’t know what to think about that green stone necklace, but I was wearing it in both illusions.
The most disturbing thought on my mind now is that in my dreams and visions I look happy. Maybe someone is telling me something. Maybe the dreams mean that I will find happiness in this small town. A picture of the boy next door crosses my mind and I wave it away, knowing those thoughts are only distractions.
Disappointment accompanies me downstairs as I take my seat at the breakfast table across from Rose. Her breakfast plate is clean with the exception of a piece of toast.
Charlotte places a hot plate in front of me and pours a glass of milk. “Thank you,” I respond without taking my eyes off of Rose. I realize I’m fearful of her being angry with me. The cold shoulder I got from her when I returned from my late-night walk last night doesn’t help. “I’m sorry I’m late for breakfast.” My eyes are turned down to avoid her discontentment.
“Nonsense.” My eyes shoot up. “We’ll get our routine down soon enough. Besides, this time is troublesome, I can imagine. You need whatever rest you can get.” Rose smiles brightly at me. I let out a breath of air in relief.
I wonder whether or not I should tell Rose about the strange events of last night. Maybe she can help with whatever is going on in my head. Maybe I need to see a shrink.
“Did you have a nice night? Charlotte says you went for a walk on the beach?”
I nod, stabbing a piece of egg from my plate. My appetite hasn’t been great lately. “My walk was nice. The beach was – peaceful.” My answers are short, I know, but I’m still debating what to say.
“This might sound strange,” I start again, “but – I fell asleep on the beach last night. When I woke up it was dark, and that’s when I finally came to dinner.” I continue to spill the rest of the story, speaking fast, but making sure to catch every important detail in hopes that someone will have answers.
Rose and Charlotte catch each other’s eye and I wonder what this silent exchange is supposed to mean. “Yes,” Rose answers. “You were all out of sorts when you came home last night. We thought maybe you’d gotten too much sun.”
Charlotte chimes in now, agreeing with Rose. “You were definitely out of it. The sun is so hot in the afternoon and that, mixed with the salt air, is all one needs to zone out.” Her smile reminds me of one worn from a mom on a black and white sitcom.
I nod slowly, not sure if I agree with her or not but secretly relieved they don’t want to put me in a straitjacket.
Rose catches my eye, knowingly. She understands. “I’m going to wash up. Church in an hour.” She stands. “Would you like to come with me, Katrina?”
Caught off guard, I look up with a shake of my head. “Um. No thank you.”
We haven’t had the religion discussion. My mother never took me to church growing up. It’s not that I wouldn’t go with her in the future. I’m just not sure what to expect or how to dress, or what to do.
Rose walks off without a word and I’m left to my food. Charlotte is now sitting across from me in Rose’s seat. She gives me a little smile. “Don’t worry Kat. Everything is just new to you here so it’s all coming as a shock. Rose and I will take care of you so there’s no need to worry about a thing. Just relax, enjoy your time here and don’t be afraid to make some new friends.”
I frown. “What if it’s not that easy? What if no one here likes me? I’ll be the new kid in school again. No one likes the new kid in school.” I think back on my brief time in public school.
Charlotte tilts her head, giving me a tender look. “Oh Kat, don’t be so insecure. Have you seen yourself lately? You’re the girl everyone will want to be around. The guys will drool over you and the girls will be so jealous of you they will want to be your friend just to find out your beauty secrets.” She winks at me now. I find myself smiling back.
She leans in closer as her eyes shimmer, as if made of glitter. “Besides that, you seem like the sweetest young woman I’ve ever met.”
I don’t know what I would do without Charlotte’s boost of confidence. I know that she’s being kind but I am encouraged by her words. And she’s right. I shouldn’t be so insecure. I’m in a new place. No one has to know that I have never really had any friends.
“So, what’s on the agenda today?” I ask perking up a bit.
“Well,” she starts. “Afternoon tea is served at noon. From there I believe Rose is going to give you the tour of her side of the house.
Charlotte summons me down to the great room for afternoon tea. I decide to dress up for the occasion in a simple green sundress, gold sandals, and my gold heart necklace given to me by my mom before she died.
“Sit, sit.” Rose gestures me to the couch across from her. I take the seat, curious as to what this is all about.
“How are you doing, Katrina? It can’t be easy making the adjustments that you are forced to make.” I wonder if Rose will always be formal with me? I suppose I’m the same with her. I just can’t imagine myself ever calling her Grandma. It would feel too foreign.
I think for a second before answering. “My mom is gone, I don’t know anyone here, and I’m living with my grandmother whom I have never met until now. It’s all a bit – unsettling.”
Rose nods and to my surprise, smiles. “We have a lot of catching up to do.” I see her relax into her chair, as I remain rigid in mine. “I’m so sorry to hear about your mother, Katrina. I know you may find this hard to believe but we were once very close.”
“Then why haven’t I met you until now?” I’m surprised by my own boldness.
Rose doesn’t seem to notice. She shakes her head now, looking far off into the distance. “I tried to keep a relationship with her. But she wanted nothing to do with me after your father…” She sighs. “She was like a daughter to me. I raised her as if she was my daughter and I’ve never stopped loving her, all these years. I understood her reasons for – everything. But I never stopped thinking about her and loving her just as mothers do. When I heard of her passing, I was heartbroken.” She stares at me now. “I am still heartbroken, for her, and for you.”
As touched as I am by Rose’s confessions I know that there’s much more to the story than she’s letting on. I find my voice again. “I never questioned my mom too much about your relationship with her. I just always assumed she had a good reason for keeping you all at a distance. But now I’m curious. You say you understood her reasons. What were her reasons?”
Rose sighs. “I understood her reasons and I respected them. I think after you spend some time here you’ll understand too. Things are different in this town and with our family especially. She just didn’t want to be a part of the life we lived. She didn’t want to live here anymore. It’s not that I never made an effort to see you both, but once she made her decision she stuck to it. She refused any type of relationship with me, your grandfather, and eventually your father.”
Rose takes a breath, allowing me to take in what she’s said. Then she continues, “I didn’t want to lose either of you. The moment I got to hold you in my arms I knew you carried a special light. But the moment she had you, all she wanted to do was protect you. And for whatever reason, she thought that she had to cut off all ties with our
family to protect you.”
“But why? Who was she protecting me from? She never said anything bad about you.”
Rose sways slightly, and takes her time to answer my question. “Your mother just wanted the best for you. This isn’t the town for everyone. Our families – traditions – aren’t for everyone. Your mother thought that this town – your father, and me especially – would have a negative influence on you.” Rose, again being vague, takes a sip of tea as if she’s just made all the sense in the world.
“But what about now? Don’t you think me being here would go against my mothers wishes?”
Rose sighs, then shrugs. “Your mother was afraid of a destiny that could not be altered. You would have ended up here no matter what. I’ve always known this. I guess that’s why I didn’t fight her too hard. I knew one day you’d be right here where you belong.” Rose’s cryptic answer leaves me with a million questions but Rose holds up her hand before I can continue my questioning. “Not now, Katrina. You will have your answers in time. I promise.”
This frustrates me since now I’m more confused then ever. And then it hits me. My grandmother is going senile. She doesn’t look her age but she sure is acting it now. Maybe I can talk to Charlotte about it. I’m sure Charlotte will know what to do.
As Rose continues to speak I watch her mannerisms in an effort to see if there are any other symptoms I should be aware of.
“You know, when your grandfather died, I thought I would never be the same. He was my best friend my entire life and then one day, he was taken from me. I understand what you are going through now and I just want you to know that I’m here for you.”
Thinking of my grandfather brings sadness to me as I remember the brief story Charlotte told me yesterday. “I’m very sorry to hear of how he died. My mom didn’t tell me the story. Did she know?”
