by Ava Benton
He was always the one with the answers—or, rather, he normally was.
I realized he looked a lot like Dad just then. Worried. He was usually so sure of himself and the decisions he made for the team.
He wasn’t thinking first about the team anymore. He was thinking about Hope and the baby.
Normally, I would say she could handle herself—I remembered everything about the mission to rescue her and everything she dealt with to keep herself alive, but that was then.
She wasn’t pregnant then. And even the worst bad guys her father could hire were nothing compared to what we were up against.
Slate and Carter looked lost, too, torn between what to do for the pack and what to do for their women.
I wanted to shake sense into both of them. I wanted to tell them they were being short-sighted. But I couldn’t. It would make me a hypocrite. I had killed one of the two men sent to spy on us just to save Nia, and I would do it again in a heartbeat.
It was time to step up. “I think we should wait to see what Mary thinks.”
Dad’s frown deepened. “Since when do I let her tell me what to do?”
“I wasn’t talking about you letting her tell you what to do. I thought she might have some ideas, is all. And you just said yourself that you weren’t sure which way to go now. If she has information that could help us, we should wait until we hear it from her.” I looked around with a shrug. “That’s what I think. It wouldn’t hurt to wait until morning.”
“You don’t think so?” Dad asked. “What happens when those two guys don’t report back to their commander or whoever it is?”
“It still wouldn’t be enough for them to send an entire squadron after us, would it? I mean, can you imagine? There are dozens of us, and we’re not the only people here. Somebody would see something, hear something. What would they do? Kill everybody? Make them disappear?”
“They could.”
“It’s a damn big risk, Dad.” I looked at my brother. “If we were on a mission, we would never take a risk like that. Not on our own, not when we were Special Ops.”
He nodded. “Yeah. You’re right.” I wondered if I should thank him for finally admitting that I was right about something.
“I think we have a little time. Maybe not a lot of time, maybe we shouldn’t set down any roots here, but this is the best place for us to be until we have a plan to end this once and for all. We can’t let them scatter us. We have to stay clear and focused, or that’s exactly what they’ll do. They’ll wait until we fall apart and run scared, and they’ll either pick us up or pick us off.”
The frown lines on Dad’s forehead started smoothing out. “You make a good point.”
“He does sometimes,” Carter muttered. It was better than nothing. Knowing he was coming around a little was almost as good as having Dad’s respect.
“Somebody’s gonna have to tell the group,” Lance pointed out. “We sound sorta bipolar here, don’t we? We’re leaving. We’re not leaving.”
“That’s true,” Dad admitted. “I’ve been losing my head way too easily, and I apologize for that. You all deserve a better leader. Somebody who can handle these curveballs with a little more grace.”
“You’ve done a great job so far,” Nia offered with a smile.
“Yes, but things have never been as hot as they are now, have they? It’s easy to be a leader when everything’s going fairly well. You keep your people as happy as you can, try to keep them from squabbling too much. You do everything in your power to keep them comfortable and safe. You think you’re doing a pretty good job—you might even get a little full of yourself. But then, something like this happens, and everything looks different. You don’t know anything you thought you knew. You realize how comfortable you got over time, even though you thought you were being so smart, so careful.”
“You have to stop beating yourself up,” Roan murmured.
“I wouldn’t call it that. I would call it being realistic.” He sounded tired and defeated.
I hated hearing that note in his voice, especially when we still had so much to do.
“That’s enough,” I snarled.
All heads turned in my direction, including Dad’s.
I stood up straight. “I’m about sick to death of hearing you feel sorry for yourself over this. You’re doing the best you can, but it’s not over yet. Suck it up and get on with leading your people. Go out there, get them together and tell them what the hell is going on. That we can’t leave yet and probably shouldn’t anyway. They need to know. You don’t want to lose their faith.”
The second the words were out of my mouth, I wished I hadn’t spoken them.
A chill spread over the room.
Dad’s eyes widened, but they were the only part of his body that moved. He stood as still as a statue. He was either going to throw me out of the cabin or kick my ass. One or the other.
I braced myself.
Instead of other of those options, his shoulders went back, and his chin lifted. A light came into his eyes that I hadn’t seen for a while. “Nia and Lance, I want you to go out and get everybody together. I’ll be out there in a minute to get them up to speed.”
The two of them jumped like somebody touched jumper cables to their asses. Nia was smiling to herself as they hurried out of the cabin. I thought she liked hearing Dad with a little more life in his voice. So did I.
When it was just the five of us, Dad slid his hands into his pockets and sighed. “Thank you for bearing with me right now,” he said in a low voice. “It means more than I can say.”
“We’re family,” Slate reminded him. “And our father would want it this way.”
“He would,” Dad agreed. His eyes met Carter’s for a millisecond.
“We’re family,” Carter agreed.
Dad’s smile spread across his face and lit up the room.
The five of us gathered around Alice’s laptop in an awkward semi-circle. She peered at the screen, frowning. “I can barely make you all out.”
“You don’t need to see us. You just need to hear us,” Roan said.
“And we can see you, so we win,” Slate added with a wink.
“Oh, you,” she said, shaking her gray head. “I swear, the world could be falling down around your head…”
“What did you find?” Dad asked, cutting her off.
She cleared her throat, shuffling papers around on her desk. “Staying there at the campsite was the smart move. There hasn’t been much chatter in regard to the two scouts sent out to search the area. It could be that they weren’t supposed to check back so soon—they might have gone out there with camping gear for several days of scouting. You might still have gotten lucky.”
I bit my tongue when I remembered the way the man had pleaded for his life and the warmth of his blood running down my face. Yes, we got lucky.
“What about finding out the location of the facilities?” Dad asked.
“We have it narrowed down to three locations. One is in Washington state, just outside Seattle. One in Colorado. One in Wyoming.”
“At least all three are roughly local,” Carter said. “I mean, considering.”
“I’m leaning toward Washington. It seems like most of the information we’ve picked up has come from the Washington area over the last six months, but there’s a chance they’ve moved since then. Even so, we’re more confident by the hour.” Mary looked up from her paperwork, and her lips were drawn in a thin line. She was just as stressed out as the rest of us.
I wondered when she had last gotten a decent night’s sleep.
She rubbed her eyes. “We’re going to get to them. I’m sure.”
“I believe you,” Dad said, and he actually sounded confident.
“What’s the plan once we locate the guys in question?” she asked.
“I can’t speak to that right now, since it’ll change depending on where we go.”
“Drew.” Mary looked around, like she was looking for me and the rest of
my team. “How do you feel about this? Do you think you’re up to the challenge?”
“Since when have we ever backed down from a challenge?” I asked.
“Yeah—compared to some of the things you’ve had us do, this is nothing,” Roan grinned.
Slate snorted. “I mean, I had to hang out in Disney World for a solid week. I still have flashbacks.”
She smiled. “I’m glad this hasn’t changed you, jokers.”
11
Nia
“How do you manage to spend time around all those kids and not get sick, like, constantly?” Alice asked Maggie.
She was sitting cross-legged on the cabin floor, and I could almost see her taking notes in her head.
Even though she wouldn’t write an article about a girl working in Disney World, she was a journalist, first and foremost, and asked questions like crazy.
Maggie chuckled. “It’s not easy. You should see some of the vitamin regimens other cast members are on. I’m talking mini pharmacies that they basically take every day, not to mention juicing and tons of water and, of course, hand sanitizer. Lots of it.”
“What happens when a snotty kid wants a hug and a kiss?” I had to know.
“You just hold them at arm’s length and coo over how sweet they are and try to razzle dazzle them into just taking a damn picture already.”
We all laughed.
“I don’t know how you do it. I don’t have nearly enough patience to work in that sort of environment.” I shook my head.
“You would make a great Elsa,” Maggie suggested. “Tall, willowy. All you need is a long, white braid.”
“No, thanks,” I said, shaking my head again. “Or—ooh—what about a villainess? Maleficent was always my favorite. I can be very domineering when I want to.”
Alice giggled. “Does Drew enjoy that about you?”
“Oh, shut up! You’re worse than Layla, I swear.”
“You didn’t answer the question,” Hope pointed out with a wink.
My face flushed. If Layla was there, she would’ve died laughing.
“There hasn’t been a chance to find out yet.”
The girls laughed. “If he’s like Roan, you’ll never get the chance,” Hope said, shaking her head.
“What’s that mean?”
“I don’t think any of these guys know how to step back in anything—not just in the bedroom, but anywhere in life,” Maggie explained.
“I remember when I first met Roan.” Hope leaned against the back of the sofa with a soft smile. “We were sitting in a diner, and he just about scared the crap out of me. All that masculinity, you know? He was overwhelming. I didn’t know how to be.”
“And being with all of them at once for the first time,” Maggie said with an eye roll. “Like, four alpha males in one room. I felt all flushed and giddy, but I blamed it on the situation. You know, the whole “somebody wants to kill me” thing. Maybe it was, partly. But mostly them.”
“You have an advantage over us, anyway,” Alice pointed out.
“What?”
“You’re one of them. You’re not a human trying to find your way around their world.”
“That’s a good point,” Hope nodded. “I was so sure they wouldn’t accept me. You girls are all welcome for me blazing the trail, by the way. I expect hefty baby gifts.”
“They aren’t like that, though. Right? I mean, I know there are people like us who won’t have anything to do with humans, or they only like certain humans who prove themselves worthy of being liked.”
Maggie shook her head. “No way.”
“I think they’re all too close to being fully human to be that way,” Hope mused. “Not that I think they have it in them in the first place, of course. They’re decent guys. They were raised well.”
“They were all more concerned with how I would react to them,” Maggie explained. “I wasn’t exactly marching in any pro-Shifter parades at that time, either, so they took their time letting me become comfortable.”
I checked the time and gasped in surprise. “Damn it. I was supposed to check in on the patrol shifts fifteen minutes ago.” I scrambled to my feet and headed for the door. “Let’s put a pin in this, because I would love to come back to it at some point.”
“Whenever you want,” Hope grinned. “We’ll tell you everything you need to know about getting yourself tangled up in this family.”
I was smiling to myself as I left the cabin, but my smile slipped when her words sank in. The way they all made it sound, Drew and I were already a permanent thing.
Didn’t I want us to be? I searched my heart as I walked across the campsite—it was a lot quieter than just a day earlier.
Most of them were keeping to themselves in their tents and cabins. Probably for the best, I reasoned. Were Drew and I for the best? Did I want things to carry on for us?
Would he want them to?
I was never the sort of person who liked putting my money on something I wasn’t sure of. Running around with Jordan and the rest of them was one thing. That was survival. I didn’t have a choice.
But with Drew, the choice was there. I didn’t have to take a chance when so much of my life already relied on chance.
What would happen when it was all over? What would life even look like then? Where would he want to live? How would we survive?
I was still mulling it over when I reached the oversized tent Layla and Daniela shared. It was tall enough to stand in without stooping, and big enough to fit four or five of us easily—a luxury compared to the way some of the others chose to sleep.
The flap opened just as I reached for it, but instead of Daniela or Layla, it was Lance who came out. And he didn’t look happy.
“Oh—sorry,” I said, stepping back.
His face was flushed, and his eyes were wild.
I couldn’t remember ever seeing him like that. Of course, my thought fear was for the group. Something big must have happened.
He shook himself. “No problem, Nia. Everything’s cool.”
I wanted to tell him everything sure as hell didn’t look cool, but I was smart enough not to challenge him.
Things got intensely awkward. He looked around like he needed a way to change the subject.
I decided to take it easy on him. “Have you talked with the patrol groups?”
He nodded with a relieved smile. “Oh, yeah. All’s well. They haven’t found any camping equipment yet, but they haven’t gone too far into the woods. Jordan told me he wants a larger group to look for that under the cover of darkness, if we do at all.”
“Fair enough.” I watched him hurry off with his hands clenched in fists, shoved deep in his pockets, before opening the tent and stepping in.
Layla was alone in there, sitting on a pile of blankets. Her expression was blank.
“What happened with Lance?” I asked.
She shook her head. “Don’t sweat it. Seriously. Not even worth talking about.”
I took a few steps closer, going slow, so I didn’t spook her. “You sure? He seemed pretty pissed.”
“Yeah, well, what else is new? He’s always had an attitude problem.”
I sensed something much deeper—much, much more serious—but I wouldn’t push when she looked and sounded so depressed.
She’d come to me if she needed me.
“Okay. So where’s Daniela?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. She sorta disappeared when Lance came around. You know how it is, since you’re just like her. Trying to get us together.”
I smiled in an attempt to lighten things up. “This coming from the girl who left me naked in the middle of the lake because she wanted to awkwardly get me together with Drew.”
She snorted. “You have a point.”
“How’s morale around here?” I asked as I sat across from her.
“Pretty good, all things considered. You know the group. We roll with the punches.”
I believed that. “This is out of the ordinary, though
.”
“Yeah, but everybody understands how important it is to stick together.”
“Even with Jordan being sort of…”
“Distant? Distracted?”
“So you’ve noticed,” I murmured. My stomach clenched.
“I have. It doesn’t mean everybody else has. And even if they have, they love Jordan. He means a lot to you and me and Daniela and Lance, but we’re not the only ones whose lives he’s changed. He’s a father figure to every single person in our family. And the thing about father figures is, you’re willing to overlook things and forgive where you can. It’s part of loving somebody, I guess.” She sounded so sad.
I wondered if she was talking about Jordan anymore. I remembered the look on Lance’s face. That wasn’t normal anger. It was personal. Was she holding out on me?
Daniela’s whistle floated through the air as she walked up to the tent. “Just thought I’d come in…” she sang.
I realized she was announcing herself just in case there was something going on inside and laughed helplessly.
Her face fell when she saw me sitting there. “Oh. It’s only you.”
“Ouch!” I kept laughing, especially when I caught the way Layla scowled at the two of us.
“You know what I mean.” Daniela sank gracefully to the ground, tucking her feet under her. “How’s it going with Drew?”
“Yes. Let’s talk about something else.” Layla cracked her knuckles in preparation. “Spill. Everything.”
“I don’t kiss and tell. Or do anything else and tell.”
The two of them practically screamed. “I knew it! I knew the two of you were meant to be!” Daniela cheered.
“You did? I didn’t.”
“Oh, please. It’s so obvious. You’re, like, the same person. Only a boy and a girl.”
“How are we the same?” I was serious, too.
Layla spoke up. “You’re both natural leaders. You both put the needs of the group ahead of your own without being asked.”
“And if any of us were in danger the way you were, you would throw yourself in front of us,” Daniela added. “That’s totally the sort of thing you would do.”
