by Shaw, Leia
She’s a lesbian. You’re fantasizing, man. But what if he wasn’t?
Maybe he should stay away from pillows around Scarlet.
Chapter 10
The front door slammed behind Reece as she dropped her purse on the kitchen table. It had been a long ass day. She kicked off her heels then ripped through her pantyhose. Riding home on the late-day train always made her feel sweaty and dirty. What she needed was a long shower, a mug of tea, and a trashy reality TV show. She checked the clock. Scarlet should’ve been home by now but it was quiet. Usually, Scarlet was starting dinner when Reece got back from the city – on the days she commuted.
Barefoot, she padded down the hallway and into their bedroom.
Scarlet was there, sitting in the center of the bed, grinning. “Look what I picked up today to try, kitten.” She dangled an object between her fingers.
A sense of dread formed a pit in Reece’s stomach. “Ugh. Not now, Scarlet.” Ever since Malachi had gotten involved in their relationship, they’d been sliding down a slippery slope. Yeah, sex was hotter than ever before. There was a certain amount of...rightness when they played now but...
The jingle caught her attention. She glared at the pink jeweled collar in Scarlet’s hand. A collar. Like a pet. Like a real sub. Maybe she submitted, at times, but she wasn’t enough of a sub to wear a collar.
“It’s just for play.” Scarlet frowned. “Try it. You might like it.”
She scrunched her nose. “It’s not really my kink.”
Scarlet knee-walked across the bed toward Reece. “How do you know without trying?”
One shoulder lifted in a careless shrug. “I just know.”
Her girlfriend’s features sharpened, as did her voice. “Come here, kitten. Now.”
She started to move then stopped herself. This was Scarlet, not Malachi. She could say no to her. There was no muscle to back Scarlet up if she didn’t accept it either. “No.”
Scarlet’s jaw clenched and her eyes narrowed. Slowly, she stepped off of the bed and approached Reece. When did she learn to look so mean? Had Malachi taught her that? She gulped and took a few steps back.
A moment later, Scarlet had her back pressed up against the wall. “You don’t tell me no, little pet. The only words that should come out of that pretty mouth are either a safeword or yes, uh...” She trailed off, looking contemplative.
“Sir?” Reece finished for her, giggling.
Scarlet focused those sharp eyes on her. “It’s better than no!”
The idea of the collar both thrilled her and scared her. Unfortunately for Scarlet, fear overrode excitement. Caving now would be the easy way. She couldn’t let Scarlet have the upper hand. A collar was a serious step. She’d read the books and blog posts. It meant she was marked. Owned. No longer herself, but a toy, an object for someone else to use. Weak and unimportant.
Despite the stern look on Scarlet’s face, and the little flutter it caused in Reece’s stomach, she couldn’t give in. Besides, it wasn’t as if Scarlet could force her. Even with her athletic body, she still weighed less than Reece. If it came down to a wrestling match, chances were good she’d win, especially in her current mood.
Instead of cowering against the wall, she stepped up to Scarlet so they were just inches apart, stared into her eyes and said, “No, sir.”
A quiet moment passed and anger grew in Scarlet’s eyes. When she thought she’d give in, like she had so many times before, Scarlet grabbed a handful of Reece’s hair and dragged her to the bed. She’d forgotten how much power Scarlet had with a hand in her hair. If she resisted, she’d lose a chunk of it.
At their bed, Scarlet shoved her face down on the edge. Reece put her hands on the mattress to push herself off but Scarlet kept a firm grip on her hair.
“Let me go!” she yelled.
“No, brat.” She pushed down on her head, keeping her pinned. “We’re going to have a little talk.”
Her temper flared and she fought. “Fuck you!” Reaching back, she grabbed onto Scarlet’s hand in her hair and tried to pry it off. When that didn’t work, she twisted her body, trying to get loose. She felt Scarlet shuffle, attempting to keep her under control. At least she was making it difficult.
A knee pressed down on her lower back, stopping her from writhing around.
“Scarlet!” She reached around again and smacked and pinched her leg wherever she could. “Ouch!” Her scalp burned when Scarlet forced her head to the side. She felt the bed move as she shifted her weight. The knee above her ass moved to her upper back.
Weight pressed on her long locks, keeping her head in place while Scarlet caught her wrists and held them behind her head. She squirmed and kicked and struggled. All it did was tire her out.
Panting, covered in sweat, she finally gave in. “Scarlet. Please let me up.”
“No,” she snapped. Then she shifted both Reece’s wrists into one of her hands and pulled up Reece’s skirt.
Oh crap. “No! Don’t!”
It was too late. Scarlet had whipped down her underwear before the protest came out. She smacked one cheek. “Why do you obey Malachi and not me?” She didn’t give Reece the chance to answer before she slammed her hand down again on the other cheek.
“Ow!”
Over and over she spanked her, alternating cheeks. She didn’t hold back and her freakishly strong hand stung like a bitch. “Why can’t you let go? I know you like it. Why are you being so stubborn?”
She stopped for a moment, seeming to wait for an answer. Even if Reece wanted to answer, she couldn’t even begin to sort out how. But Scarlet didn’t wait for long. She started spanking her again and each slap felt harder than the last. Soon she was squirming to dodge them. Tears threatened to spill. From the pain?
Another slap. And another.
“Ow, Scarlet!”
“Answer me!” she demanded. “Why won’t you just let go?” Her voice broke but she kept hitting her sore ass over and over.
It was becoming clear Scarlet wasn’t going to stop until she answered. But even she didn’t fully understand why she couldn’t do it. Why she was holding onto control so hard? Why couldn’t she let go when it came to Scarlet? Finally the floodgates opened and she started to sob.
“Okay,” she yelled through tears. “I’m scared! It’s because I’m scared.”
From the corner of her eye, she saw Scarlet’s hand go up. She braced herself but nothing happened. A moment later, Scarlet scrambled off of her.
“You’re scared?” She sounded incredulous.
Rubbing her face back and forth on the mattress, she wiped the wetness from her cheeks. Or maybe just spread it around. “Can I get up?”
Silence.
“Please, Scarlet?” Her voice sounded so tiny and pleading. Was this what Scarlet wanted? Her, broken and sad?
“Yes. I...I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”
She turned over, hissing when her ass hit the bed. Scarlet had moved to the middle of the bed, and sat there with slumped shoulders and red, puffy eyes. Red eyes?
“Why are you crying?” she asked, fighting the urge to comfort her. If anything needed comforting, it was her sore ass.
“I don’t know. Why are you crying?”
She rolled her eyes but sniffled. “Gee, I wonder.”
“I didn’t hit you that hard.”
“You underestimate your strength,” she mumbled, scooting toward Scarlet.
They sat cross-legged in the middle of the bed, both awkwardly gazing at anything other than each other.
Before Reece could fill the silence, Scarlet said softly, “I don’t want you to be scared of me.”
“I’m not scared of you.” She looked up and saw the sadness there on Scarlet’s face and it felt like a punch to the gut. She deserved better. An explanation at least. Or an attempt at one.
“I love you too much to let this break us up,” Scarlet said. “If you don’t want to be my sub –”
“It’s not that.”
/> “Then what are you scared of?”
After a loud sigh, she gave in. “Everything. I’m scared this will change us. I’m scared I won’t be good enough for you. I’m scared something bad will happen if I lose control –”
“Not lose,” Scarlet said, shaking her head. “You’re not losing control. You’re handing it over willingly.”
Reece looked at her. “Right.” Same difference.
“You still don’t get it. Submission isn’t me taking your will away. It’s you giving it over to me. Because you trust me.” At Reece’s silence, she frowned. “Do you trust me?”
Did she? Trusting anyone was a stretch. She was a classic type A personality. Giving up the slightest bit of control made her panic. But that was what Scarlet wanted of her. She wanted her to hand it over. Just like that. To prove she trusted her? Was this a test?
“Don’t think about it so hard,” Scarlet said then pressed her finger between Reece’s knitted brows. “Just answer. Do you trust me?”
She thought back through the last year of their relationship. She’d shared parts of herself she’d never shared with anyone. Her deepest, darkest secrets. Her biggest fears. When her grandma had died suddenly from a heart attack, she’d fallen into a deep depression, gained twenty pounds then almost slipped into a full-blown eating disorder. Not only had Scarlet been there for her, she never judged her. Not even a little bit. She made her feel beautiful – stretch marks and all.
Scarlet had seen every bit of ugliness inside her – every nasty thought, every weakness, and loved her anyway. Reece had spent the first six months of their relationship shocked that she could tell Scarlet anything and it wouldn’t scare her. She’d tested it, waited for Scarlet to become disgusted and leave. But she only loved her harder, insisted she was beautiful and smart and worthy. At this point, trust was a no-brainer.
“Of course I trust you,” she said.
“So why don’t you trust me to take control for a little while? Do you think I’d push you further than you can handle? Do you think I won’t take care of you? I love you more than anything. I love you so much it hurts. Every time you walk into the room, it takes the air from my lungs. I’d never do anything to risk losing you. Or to hurt you –”
Reece tossed her a look.
“ – more than you can handle. I’d do anything for you. Even go back to vanilla if that’s what you want.”
“It’s not what I want.” That much she knew was true. Then what did she want?
“Do you want to go back to switching? We could do that. Maybe you just need some pointers from Malachi then –”
She shook her head. “No. He’s right. I’m not a switch.” Then what was she? A submissive? A weak-willed woman who needed someone to direct her life? If that was what Scarlet wanted... Tears fell from her eyes and trickled down her cheeks.
“Ohhh,” Scarlet said then shifted to sit against the headboard. “Come here, love.”
Reece looked at her arms, open and inviting, just like her heart. Scarlet deserved someone better. Maybe she’d finally come to her senses and dump Reece. But the comfort was too much to resist right now so she crawled across the bed and into her arms.
Lips pressed against her head and Scarlet stroked her hair, soothing the ache she’d caused. “Don’t cry. We’ll figure it out. The important thing is we do it together, right?”
She didn’t trust her voice so she just nodded.
“Nothing will ever change that, Reece.” Scarlet rubbed her back then kissed her hair again.
She wasn’t dumping her? After all this, Scarlet wasn’t giving up on her? She felt a huge relief lifted from her shoulders.
Stuttering and hiccupping, she asked, “If I agree to be your sub, will you still...” Her voice quivered. “Love me the same?” She squeezed her eyes shut, fearing the worst.
“What?” A hand came under her chin and Scarlet forced her head up to look at her. “Of course I will. You’ll always be my kitten, whether you’re the sub, the Domme, the mother of our children...” She smiled. “Or an old lady.”
Reece chuckled and buried her face in Scarlet’s neck.
Scarlet tightened her arms around her. “Being a sub doesn’t mean you’re not you, silly. And I don’t want to control your life. Trust me, it’s waaay too complicated for me to want to meddle in.” A little laugh then she sighed longingly. “We’ve always been like this, you know. Even before we officially started kink. You’d show me submission in small ways. You just didn’t recognize it. Then when we forced it in the bedroom, you resisted and withdrew.”
“I did?”
“Yes. Don’t you remember? When I came in from work, you’d help me shower then let me play with your hair for hours while we talked and watched TV.”
“I just wanted to see you naked.”
They both chuckled.
“You like kneeling for me,” Scarlet said. “Admit it. Because like most subs, deep down inside, it makes you feel good to please me.”
Her face flushed. How could something sound so wrong but feel so right? She wasn’t a simpering female who believed in stereotypical family roles. She was an independent, strong woman. But there was a certain satisfaction in pleasing Scarlet, going the extra distance. Even kneeling at her feet felt...right. She hated that she felt that way. Being a Domme fit so much better with her personality and career.
“I love that about you, you know,” Scarlet said quietly, still petting her. “I love this soft side of you. That you may be powerful in your day job but when you walk through that door, you’re mine. My pet, who lets me do naughty things to her then curls up in my lap and falls asleep. That you give me that, Reece, means the world to me.”
Though more tears fell, a small smile made its way to her lips. She loved that too. It made her feel loved and protected and...complete. She could trust Scarlet with that, right? It wasn’t as if she’d turn into some cruel dictator. Scarlet was all goodness and fairness and love. Maybe Malachi had been right. If she stopped fighting it, stopped forcing their roles and putting them in the box she thought they belonged, their sex issues would work themselves out.
“Scarlet?” she said in a small voice still tight from sobbing.
“Yes?”
After a deep breath, she peeked up at her. “Can we try again?”
Her brows lifted in a look of surprise then her eyes warmed. “Yes. We can try again.”
Reece wiggled out of Scarlet’s embrace and peered around the room. When she spotted the discarded collar on the floor at the foot of the bed, she turned to her girlfriend. “I’ll be right back.”
She hopped off the bed and picked up the collar. It really was beautiful. She could tell Scarlet had put a lot of thought into choosing it for her. Delicate and girly. It even looked like a name brand. Emotion lodged in her throat. She was the shittiest girlfriend in the world.
Eyes on Scarlet, she crawled toward her until she was kneeling in front of her. She held out the collar. “Will you please put it on me, Scarlet?”
Her lips curved into a wide smile. “Yes.” She knelt up and took the collar from Reece’s hand then fumbled with the buckle. Once it was open, she moved Reece’s hair to the side.
“Take your dress off,” she whispered.
Reece didn’t question the order. Naked felt right for this. She slipped the dress over her head and threw it on the floor.
Scarlet’s expression changed as the collar buckled into place. Gone was the satisfied grin. Now she watched her intently, her gaze focused on Reece’s neck like a predator eyeing its prey.
“There,” she said, arranging Reece’s hair around the collar. “It looks...perfect.”
As Scarlet stared at her, all admiration and love, she was struck with an overwhelming sense of devotion. Maybe it had something to do with the collar, snuggled up tightly around her neck, a constant reminder of Scarlet’s hold on her. Whatever caused it didn’t matter. Right now she wanted to belong to Scarlet – wanted to be hers forever. Her sub. Her ki
tten. Her wife. If she had a ring, she’d propose today.
“Is it comfortable?” Scarlet asked.
“Very.”
“Fuck. I’ll have to get you another one soon.”
“What?”
She chuckled. “It’s not supposed to be too comfortable. It’s supposed to be a reminder of who you belong to.”
“It is. Trust me.”
Scarlet’s brow creased. “Are you okay with it?”
She gave her a shaky smile. “Yes. More than I thought I would be.”
Her answering grin was contagious. After an awkward moment of grinning stupidly at each other, Scarlet gave her head a shake then ordered, “Up. Come on. I want to teach you some positions.”
Why did this feel like a homework assignment? “Positions? You know I suck at memorizing, Scarlet.”
“We’ll start with three. You can remember three, right?”
She sighed dramatically. “I guess.”
Scarlet swatted her ass. “You’re already starting on a bad note. Don’t make me spank you again. Pain seems to be the only thing to get you in the right mindset.” She stood up next to the bed and stared down at Reece. Her lips tightened and she crossed her arms, as if asserting all of her power into one heated glare. If she was going for authoritative, she nailed it. Lessons with Malachi were paying off.
Reece dropped her gaze.
“Good girl.
She was surprised to find she liked Scarlet’s praise. She felt that “good girl” right down to her toes. Maybe the collar had magical powers that transformed the wearer into an uber-sub.
“Now kneel.”
She dropped to her knees on the area rug.
“Mmm.” Scarlet slid a finger under the collar.
Reece dared a glance at her face. Her gaze was rapt, like she was relishing the sight of her. The finger disappeared and Scarlet walked off. Reece heard her rummaging through the closet then she returned, brandishing a crop.
“First position is a relaxed kneel.” She stood in front of Reece. “This is a service position. It means you’re ready and waiting for instruction. Keep your head down unless I tell you otherwise.” With the crop, she tapped her knee. “Open your legs wider.”
