Now, driving this car, rushing with my best friends in all the world through the night, I felt a sense of freedom. It was as if we had all thrown off the chains of who we were and what people tried to make us into and had finally become free. As recently as a few hours ago, we were better known by the numbers on our files. We were, as Crystal often said, "in the system," labeled and described by some official, our little histories summarized in a few pages that included biological facts about our blood type, our eye color, our inoculations.
None of that mattered to us now. We were launched, sailing into space, searching for a new planet, a new place to call home. We would soon make our own histories, fill our own files. For the first time, I felt like I was in control of my destiny.
"Watch your speed," Crystal said. "Even at this hour, there could be a radar trap, and we can't get pulled over, Brooke."
"I know," I said and glanced down at the speedometer. The truth was I hadn't been watching it. I had been daydreaming and I was going too fast. Good old Crystal, I thought, always thinking
I glanced in the rearview mirror. Butterfly had slumped down in her seat, her head to one side, her eyes closed. She looked like a rag doll, so vulnerable, so dependent. I think all three of us saw something of ourselves in Butterfly and that was why we were so protective of her.
The radio droned on. Miles and miles of highway rolled out before us and then disappeared into the darkness behind us. Occasionally, another vehicle drew closer and then passed us. I held the wheel steady. We were making good time. I felt like the pilot of a space ship, launched and moving closer and closer toward that point when we would break out of the earth's gravity. Soon, the past's strong grip on us would be broken and we wouldn't look back.
"Maybe we ought to check your map now, Crystal," I suggested as we left more familiar places.
Crystal unfolded the map and found the switch for the light in the rear, but it didn't work. She leaned forward to catch some of the illumination from the front.
"We could either get onto the New York Thruway or take Route Six to the Palisades Parkway and find the exit for 1-95," she explained.
"Which is better?" I asked.
"The fewer people who see us and can trace us, the better off we are," she concluded. "Avoid toll booths. Take route six. The exit should be coming up shortly."
We watched for it and when we saw the signs, I slowed down, made the turns and followed the highway.
"You're really doing very good," Raven said, impressed. "I should have taken drivers' education, too."
It would have been a great help to have another driver, I thought.
Crystal sat back and yawned.
"If Megan didn't wake anyone, they still don't know we're gone," she said after a long moment.
I glanced at the clock on the dash. It was nearly three-thirty in the morning. Gordon, his brain soaked in whiskey, lay dumb in his bed. Everyone else slept quietly. In a few hours, they would all be surprised.
Raven rested her head against the window. The exhaustion we had staved off with our excitement was settling in our limbs, in our eyes.
"Are we going to drive all night?" Crystal asked me.
"It's probably a good idea to make as much distance as possible, don't you think?"
"Of course, but are you all right? You don't want to fall asleep at the wheel."
"I'm fine," I said even though my eyelids wanted to slide closed like elevator doors. I
concentrated on keeping them wide open. The radio station had become all talk. "Find some music again, Raven," I asked. "Something lively, okay?"
She turned the dial until she found some upbeat sounds and sat back again.
We drove on. I should have kept up the conversation. Butterfly was in a deep sleep by now and Crystal, despite her efforts, permitted her eyes to close one time too many and drifted off as well. Raven, emotionally and physically exhausted, stopped talking and let her head lay back. I suddenly realized I was the only one awake. I started to count, to sing to myself, to move with the music, anything to keep myself alert, but I went into a daydream at the wrong time and suddenly blinked and saw a sign that said: GEORGE WASHINGTON BRIDGE.
"Crystal? Crystal!" I cried.
"What? Oh, I'm sorry. I must have fallen asleep. Where are we?"
"Are we supposed to go over the George Washington Bridge?" I asked. The toll booth was directly in front of me. There was no way to avoid it.
"No, No!" she cried. "Oh Brooke, you missed the exit."
"What should I do?" I asked in a panic.
"What's wrong?" Raven asked. Butterfly groaned and sat up, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.
"Just cross the bridge," Crystal said quickly. "Don't act lost. Act natural. Act as if you've done this before. I'll figure something out afterward," she said, unfolding her maps.
I slowed down, read the toll cost and reached into my pocket for the money. An African- American woman who looked like she was about forty took the bill and gave me change without even looking at me.
"She couldn't care less who we were. That has to be one boring job," I muttered and then looked ahead at the George Washington Bridge all lit up. What a daunting sight, I thought as I started us across it, my heart thumping like a parade drum again. New York City came into view against the night sky.
"Look at that," Raven said, her voice full of amazement-The three of them put their faces to the window and gaped at the Empire State Building and the Twin Towers, all the buildings twinkling. Commercial jet planes seemed close enough to crash into them. It was breathtaking.
"I bet Broadway is lit up like a carnival," Crystal said excitedly.
"Broadway! Can we see Broadway?" Raven asked, jumping up and down in her seat.
"Yes, can we?" Butterfly chimed in.
"We've got to get back on track," I said. I wasn't sure I'd be able to drive in the city traffic.
"Oh, please. Let's just see it. It can't be far, right, Crystal?" Raven pleaded. "We're already here. We might as well make the best of the mistake."
"What do I do?" I asked as we approached the Manhattan side of the bridge.
"Stay on your right. We'll take the Henry Hudson Parkway and go downtown. Then, we'll let Raven and Butterfly see Broadway before we go through the tunnel and I get us back on the route. Stay alert now, everyone," Crystal ordered.
This late at night, there thankfully were no traffic jams. Following Crystal's instructions, I got off at 42nd Street and drove very slowly through the city streets until we suddenly burst out on Times Square. The lights and the signs were so overwhelming, I had to pull over. All of us just gaped at the big screens, the number of people walking the streets despite the time, and the traffic.
"Everything's so gigantic," Butterfly said, sticking her head out and looking straight up at a towering building. "It's beautiful," she cried.
"Someday, Butterfly, your name's going to be up there in lights," I said. "And Raven will sing on a stage here."
"And what about you?" Crystal asked.
"I'll own one of the theaters," I said. Everyone laughed, and then jumped when we heard a loud rap on the side of the station wagon.
A tall policeman stepped up to the car.
"And what do you think you're doing?" he asked. He leaned down, looked in at all of us and then stood up and squinted at me.
Oh no, I thought. If he asks for my license and registration, it's all over. All we would have accomplished was a ride to New York City.
"We just wanted to see the city at night, officer," Crystal interjected. "We just came in to visit my aunt."
"Well you can't park here. See? It says 'No Parking or Standing." He pointed to the sign in front of the station wagon.
"I'm sorry," I said.
He took a closer look at all of us.
"You should all be asleep now anyway," he continued. "Your aunt know you're out here?"
"We've just arrived. We're on our way to her apartment," Crystal said.
"You kno
w how to get there?" he asked.
"Yes sir, we have good directions," Crystal replied.
"Move on, then," he said.
"Thank you," Crystal said. "Go, go, go," she muttered behind my ear.
I put the car in gear and pulled away, again a little too fast. Everyone held her breath. Crystal looked back.
"It's all right. He's not chasing us."
"You did great, Crystal," I said. "Fast thinking." Were we all just naturally good liars? I wondered. Had our lives made us that way?
"Just stay` alert. Turn here," she commanded. "We're looking for the Lincoln Tunnel." She glanced down at her map. "Make a left ahead and keep going."
Despite the hour and our fatigue now, it was impossible not to be wide awake. I followed Crystal's directions precisely. When we entered the tunnel, Butterfly was afraid we would never get out. It did seem to go on forever, but suddenly we burst out and then carefully, now with all eyes on the signs and directions, found our way to the route west.
I gazed at the clock again. In a few hours, Gordon Tooey would wake, get dressed, have his coffee, complain about something, step out of the Lakewood House and see his car was missing.
And then, it would begin.
We drove into the dawn, seeing and feeling the sun come up. When it became very bright, we saw a clear, blue sky ahead with just a puff of a cloud here and there against the horizon.
"Why don't we stop for some coffee?" Raven said. "I need some caffeine, and I need to use the bathroom."
"Me too," Butterfly chimed in. I was glad they asked. I hadn't wanted to be the first to say it, but I was getting to feel like a balloon filling with water. I saw a sign advertising a rest stop in ten miles.
"We'll stop there," I said nodding. Just a little more than ten minutes later, we pulled into the parking lot and stepped out of the car, all of us stretching. Probably from the tension, my lower back ached and my legs felt as if I had been squeezed into Gordon and Louise's famous pickle barrel.
"It feels great to move around," Raven said. "If you're complaining already, can you imagine what you'll be like by the time we reach the
Midwest," I said. I had to keep them all strong and determined, which meant I had to be even stronger. "Who's complaining? Was I complaining, Crystal?"
"Let's not argue about it out here," she said.
"Come on." She took Butterfly's hand and the two of
them started for the restaurant.
There were three motorcycles parked in front of
the restaurant, and through the window I could see
three young men in leather jackets gaping at us.
Actually, they were all staring at Raven.
"Uh oh. Here we go again." I warned. "What?" Raven had been fiddling with her
purse and hadn't noticed the motorcyclists.
"Brooke's just pointing out that you seem to
have a fan club inside," Crystal said in her matter- offact way.
"Ugh. They look like the guys my mother used
to date. Trouble. With a capital T." Raven shuddered a
little as she wrapped her arms around herself. "Don't worry, Raven, we won't let them bother
you." Butterfly was always eager to protect Raven.
She knew what it was like to be lavished with
unwanted attention.
"Come on, let's just go in and sit down. They'll
leave us alone if we ignore them." I said, opening the
door to the diner.
After we'd ordered I got up to use the bathroom
and when I returned to the table I saw that one of the
motorcyclists had sat down in my vacant chair. I
cleared my throat and he started to get up. Crystal,
Raven and Butterfly all looked up at me gratefully, as
if I'd saved them from some sort of torture. When I
heard the motorcyclist speak, I knew I had.
"Well, if you girls need anything you just holler
for Paulio. I'll be right over there," he said, pointing to
the table where his greasy friends sat.
Thankfully the waitress came then with our
order and we settled in to fill our grumbling tummies.
As we finished the last of our food Crystal asked if
we'd need gas soon.
"I'll get gas here before we leave," I said. "The
wagon's a guzzler. Lucky we have Gordon's credit
card."
"Don't you have to sign his name?" Butterfly
asked fearfully.
"We'll use those tanks where you just stick the
card in," I said. "When we drove up, I saw they had
them here."
Crystal took out the map and we started to
discuss the trip, where we thought we would be after
another day's travel, and how far we would get by
tomorrow.
Suddenly, all our hearts fell. A police patrol car
pulled up and parked right under our window. The
officers got out and gazed toward Gordon's station
wagon.
"It's too soon for there to be a description," I
said and looked to Crystal for confirmation. "Unless Megan went right to him after we left
and he got on the phone with the police," she replied. Butterfly looked ready to cry.
"They'll put us in jail," she whispered.
"Everyone take it easy. Don't act suspicious," Crystal
said.
The waitress brought us the coffee and juice as
the policemen entered.
"What are they doing?" I asked Crystal. She
glanced up.
"They're going to the counter. They're not even
looking our way."
I blew the air out of my lungs and sat back. "You know," I said mournfully, "we're going to
have this sort of reaction every time we see policemen."
"That's why we want to get off the main highways as soon as we can," Crystal said. She went back
to her map. The waitress served our toast and muffins
and we all started to eat.
"So where are you all going?" I turned to see
one of the motorcyclists standing by our table. "To visit relatives, like I said," Crystal replied.
"Early start on your summer vacation, huh?" "Something like that," I said quickly and gave
him my best look that said "Buzz off." But he ignored
me and turned to Raven again.
"Where do these relatives live?" he pursued.
His dirty, dark brown hair, although tied back, had
strands popping up like broken piano wires. He had a
thin nose and deep-set dark eyes. If he had shaved
recently, he had done a poor job. Patches of stubble were on his chin and cheeks. His sideburns looked
coated with motor oil.
Raven looked at Crystal for help.
"We're going to a little town outside of
Philadelphia," she said and pointed to it on her map. "Oh, you got a map, huh?" He leaned over.
Then he looked back at his two buddies who were
paying their bill. "Be right along," he called. "I know
that town," he told Crystal. "What you want to do is
get off at the next left down here," he said pointing
through the window and up the highway, "and follow
that road for ten miles to 1-78. You can cut in here,"
he said tracing his long, bony finger on Crystal's map,
"and you'll save about fifty miles."
"Really?" Crystal studied the map intently. "Yeah, really. We're from here so we know the
shortcuts and stuff. Well, have a good trip," he said
with a smile and joined his friends.
"Thank God he's gone," Raven said in a rush,
and it was obvious she'd been holding her breath. "Maybe he wasn't as bad as we thought. A
nd, if
he's right," Crystal said, "that would cut miles off our
trip and also give us a way to avoid heavy traffic. It
looks like it makes sense."
We gazed out the window as the three mounted their cycles, all of them looking back at us. The one with the ponytail waved and then they roared out of the parking lot. We finished our coffee, toast and muffins, paid the bill and left as quietly as we could. One of the policemen at the counter gazed at us, but
quickly went back to his eggs.
"My stomach was doing flip-flops when that
cop looked at us," Raven said after we all got into the
station wagon. "Brooke's right. We're going to be in a
sweat every time we see a police car or a policeman." Crystal paused and studied her map again. "Let's try the shortcut he gave us. It looks like a
very quiet way and maybe we won't see any policemen for a while."
"Good idea," I said. We got in and I drove up to
the gas pumps, filled the tank, paid with Gordon's
credit card simply by slipping it into the slot on the
pump, and then drove away without looking back. "This is it," Crystal said, pointing to a road on
our left. It looked poorly maintained.
"This? Are you sure?"
"It's what he told us," she said. "First left turn
after the restaurant."
"Okay," I said, turning. The road was chipped
and cracked and after only what seemed like a mile or two, was nothing but potholes. I had to slow down considerably. "This can't be right," I said. "No wonder
it's quiet, it's unused."
"I'm sure this is the road he pointed out,"
Crystal said. "It's what he told us," she repeated and
then, as if they could hear her, the three motorcyclists
appeared, two crisscrossing right in front of us, the
other, with the ponytail, riding alongside. I had to
stop. The two cyclists in front of us stopped, parked
their motorcycles right at the front bumper, and got
off.
"What's going on?" I demanded, my voice
quaking.
"I see you took my advice on your shortcut,"
Paulio said. "You girls must be in a big hurry." "So?" I said. I hoped he couldn't hear my voice
shake.
"So you're on a toll road," he said with a grin. "What?" I started to smile, but one of the other
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