by Mira Bailee
Devon hands me a drink, and I take a sip. Fruity and a little too strong. But I’m on a luxury vacation. I’m going to enjoy every moment.
His own drink in hand, Devon finishes it in seconds and goes for a refill. I sit on one of the window seats staring out at the horizon. It’s phenomenal—the sky a canvas of oranges and pinks leading us toward the ends of the Earth.
“You know, the view’s even more spectacular outside.” Devon sits behind me, not leaving much space at all between us. He speaks quietly into my ear, sending a tingle down my spine. “Want me to show you?”
“I’m okay here. You don’t have to.”
He places his lips on the back of my shoulder, and his hot breath caresses my skin. “I want to.”
I want to too. But my mind is far from the sunset when I look back at him. “Okay.”
I take a gulp from my drink, and set the glass on the bar, letting Devon lead the way again. Another flight of stairs, and we’re greeted by the open air. “You do understand how ridiculous this boat is, right? Like the friggin’ Titanic.” Oh, Olivia. Stupid comment. This is why you shouldn’t speak.
Devon doesn’t miss a beat and seems to find me endearing instead of awkward. “Only much smaller and above sea level. Come see this.”
We’re on the sun deck, and he pulls me toward the front of the boat—the bow, he explains. I’m learning so much, maybe I can have my own yacht someday…See, I can make jokes.
The front of the deck is tiled with thick cushions. Who needs lounge chairs when you can drop to the ground and be immediately comfortable? A dozen people could sleep on this…easily. Pillows line the edge as though to keep everyone contained. Come to think of it, very kinky things could happen here…and probably have.
I look straight out toward the setting sun and step closer to it like I could touch it. My shins hit the edge of the cushions. I sit down, still staring. All the luxury inside couldn’t possibly compare to the natural beauty out here. “Devon. Wow, this is just…” There are no words.
He sits behind me again—his body almost flat against mine. I feel his mouth on my skin, and I can’t help but close my eyes. I lean forward as his soft kisses trail along my back and up my neck. My entire body feels electric—alive.
Devon gently nudges my arm to get me to turn around. I scoot back to one of the propped up pillows. Yes, it’s all as comfortable as I assumed. I could live here forever. Staring up at Devon, I want him closer. Maybe it’s the atmosphere. Maybe it’s the liquid courage I was just drinking. But for the first time, I’m not afraid to act on my feelings.
So I do.
I clench the fabric of his shirt in both my fists and pull him down to me. Without hesitation, his lips meet mine. Not soft and slow this time, but quick and with force—like two young lovers about to be caught. He tastes like liquor, and my own light-headedness makes me briefly wonder if this is the right time. I made such a big deal about how we hardly know each other and accused him of wanting only one thing. Yet here I am. A hypocrite. But I’m sick of the push and pull between us. The strange interactions. The stupid arguing. The obvious spark igniting every time we’re near each other. Devon kisses my neck, and I stifle a moan. I want more where this came from. Who cares what we think tomorrow? I just want tonight.
I let my hands travel the terrain of his bare chest—my fingers making their own paths along the crevices and smooth plateaus of his toned body. I can feel his pounding heart against the palm of my hand. Oh Devon? Mr. Calm and Cool. You’re giving your excitement away. And not just through his quickening pulse. I can feel him growing harder against the inside of my thigh, and I move below him to encourage whatever he wants to do next.
Devon’s hand moves down the side of my breast. Down the side of my stomach. Down to my hip, where his powerful fingers grip my flesh as though I’d float away if he let go. I’m locked in place as he presses against me harder. His lips and tongue send electrical shocks wherever they touch—my fingertips. My temple. Behind my ear. My throat. I lick at his lingering taste on my lips as he moves lower. He kisses the skin exposed at the top of my dress. He kisses at the hint of cleavage just above the fabric. He kisses my breast as he hovers over my body, still making his way down.
I’m more alive right now than I’ve been in years, and it’s been a long time since I’ve been with a guy—not to mention a lifetime since I’ve been with a guy like Devon.
Just for one night. I’m letting go.
Oh, and I do. Devon kneels in front of me and kisses my bare knee with the lightest touch, as though it’s breakable. I use my other leg to hook him from behind and force him closer.
He reaches up with both hands, finding a place for them on either side of my hips. In his firm grasp, I squirm, wanting to beg him for more.
He moves one hand away and a single finger teases the skin at the hem of my skirt. I’d like to rip the whole dress off to make it easier on him, but let’s not hurry things. I bend my free leg to run it along his torso. His skin is becoming slick with sweat. I press my foot in between his thighs, rubbing the length of his hardness. I want him in me.
He pushes the fabric of my skirt up, and his fingers meet the silky edge of my thong. I’m exposed to the entire world, and it’s exhilarating. I try to focus on steadying my breathing, but each inhale catches as fire sneaks its way through the depths of me.
Without hesitation, he moves up, his mouth just over the thin fabric of my panties. His hot breath cuts straight through to my skin, and my muscles involuntarily stiffen. I’m no longer in control as my hips move forward pleading for him to touch me. To taste me.
He looks me straight in the eyes—his pupils black stone—as he leans down and kisses the silk covering my clit. A moan escapes me, and he grins as he uses his tongue to massage me in slow circles.
I throw my arm over my mouth knowing if he keeps at it, things could get…loud.
His hand runs along the outside of my panties, and I feel myself growing wetter with each stroke. He slips his thumb through one side, and pulls the fabric away. Just as the night breeze hits my bare skin, I hear something.
No.
Footsteps come stomping up from the lower deck, and I jump up to straighten my dress.
No. No. No. No.
Dammit! We were so close to…to something.
But Devon isn’t discouraged. He continues to tease me through my dress.
“Hey, someone’s coming up here.”
“It’s okay.”
I gulp. “Devon. People are coming. You have to stop.”
He obeys, smoothing out my skirt and returning to my side.
“Sorry,” I say, as though I told his friends to interrupt.
Devon meets my gaze, his eyes wide and intense. The sun’s been replaced by a pitch-black sky sprinkled with stars. Even in the dark, I can see him clearly. He sits up straight and kisses me, softer this time, and the gesture ensures me I have nothing to be sorry about. I wish his friends would leave—go back inside, jump overboard, whatever. But they’re settling in their own spots on the lounges that line the rest of the deck. They’re too close which means our moment is officially over.
I’m disappointed as Devon takes my hand, tracing his fingers along my own while I try to join our intruders’ conversation.
“So Olivia. Our man, Devon, might have convinced you he’s a hotshot, but—”
“Don’t be an ass, Mac,” Devon butts in.
Devon turns to me to see if I want a drink. I’m good, thanks. He gets up to help himself at the bar up here. This yacht has everything.
“So what sort of secrets is he hiding from me?” I ask, knowing his friends are probably drunk enough to divulge. The aching in me is tapering off as I find myself returning back to the real world, but I watch Devon at the bar and am tempted to thank the stars above that I agreed to come out here with him. This could be the new normal. I can do this. We could be together.
Devon’s friend Mac speaks up again. “You should ask him about the
Audi story.”
“The what?”
“The Audi story. It’s his best one. Never mind, watch this.”
Devon rejoins the group, sitting next to me while his friend brings up this supposedly epic story of Devon’s past.
“Just tell her about it.” Mac—who’s proving to be sort of a jerk—turns to me. “And if he tries to make you think he wasn’t arrested too, he’s full of shit.”
I nod. Arrested? Is this what I’ve been avoiding in the tabloid articles?
“It’s nothing,” Devon says. “Me, Mac, and Lucas…” He points to his other friend who’s been mostly silent all evening. “…We borrowed a car, and it had to be returned.”
“Have you gone soft, Dev?” Lucas has a mischievous grin that could compete with Devon’s. He’s attractive, and his dark eyes and the tattoos on his arms and chest make him look intense. “So one night, we go by Austin’s—he’s the guy who used to hook us up with good shit, if you know what I mean.” I don’t. “So Devon always prepaid Austin to keep the supply steady. Plus, the guy didn’t talk to the paps, so he was secure. But on this night, Austin doesn’t pull through. He’s got nothing. So a coked up Devon here decides his money’s not to be wasted, and steals his car as retribution. We’re following behind the stolen car and stop for some cigarettes a few miles down the road. Devon ends up getting caught with it right in the damn parking lot. Only while Mac and I were inside, he and Kennedy decide to get busy like a couple of fucking rabbits, so he’s caught bare ass naked in the backseat.”
Lucas is laughing like this is the funniest story ever. My stomach is twisting in a knot. I can’t even bring myself to look at Devon who’s not even bothering to stop his so-called friend from telling me all this.
Mac takes over and finishes the tale. “But Lucas and I were dipshits and walked back to the car like it’s ours anyway. We don’t bother to acknowledge the police cruiser parked behind it, and we get snagged up just as quick. Fortunately, your boyfriend has connections, so it ended well.”
I nod my head slowly, not looking at Devon. Stolen car. Public sex with his ex. Getting arrested. Cocaine. Ended well?
I don’t know what part of all this I like least.
“I think I’ll get that drink now.
I stand up before Devon can offer to get it for me. I’m not sure what to think right now. Instead of stopping at the bar out here, I find the stairs and head back inside to the lobby. I just need to be alone for a minute.
God, I’m such an idiot. I knew I should’ve stayed away, and I was dumb to think I could be with him. I throw some mixture of juice and vodka into a glass. I’m tempted to smash the bottle of liquor against the wall. Or maybe against Devon’s head. I knew he was hiding something. Why would I get on a boat with a guy I don’t know? Everything about him has screamed that he’s trouble, and I followed him around like it could just be ignored.
This room is quiet—peaceful—and I make myself comfortable on one of the plush couches. At some point, the Captain must have turned the boat around because I can see the coastline growing nearer.
After several minutes, I wonder if it’s possible Devon could’ve forgotten about me. I kind of wish that were the case.
“You okay?” he says when he does come looking for me.
Devon comes down the stairs and sits down next to me. He reaches over and brushes a loose strand of hair behind my ear. I flinch, pulling away from him.
“I’m fine.”
“Good.” He leans over and kisses me, but I push him away.
“Dammit, Devon. Obviously I’m not fine.” My heart pounds as I try to control how angry I’m feeling. “What the hell was all that?”
“What? The guys? They exaggerate.” He runs his hand up my thigh and under my skirt. He reeks of whiskey, and I can’t help but wonder if he’ll even remember all this tomorrow.
“So make me feel better. Tell me which parts of all that weren’t true?”
Devon rolls his eyes and gets up. “Olivia,” he says, drawing out each syllable. “You’ve got to relax.”
“What part of that story wasn’t true, Devon?”
He sighs and leans against the arm of a couch. His gaze shifts up as he goes back through each detail.
“Tell me,” I say again. This time I’m almost pleading. He can’t be that person. An addict. A criminal.
“It doesn’t matter. It was so long ago.”
It was all true. No matter how much I don’t want to believe it.
“I can’t do this.”
“Do what? We were having fun.”
“I’m your employee. You’re practically my boss. And besides that, I can’t be involved with someone who spends his time breaking the law and doesn’t seem bothered by it.”
“My past, Olivia.” Devon stands up and walks to the bar. Great, keep drinking. More points against you. I shake my head just as he turns around and sits on a bar stool instead of going to the other side to play barkeep. “You’re telling me you’ve never fucked up before?”
There’s anger in his voice. Just like that first day we met when he was mad at his father. I stare at him with no other response.
“Sorry. Listen, Mac? Lucas? They’re assholes.”
“They’re your friends.”
“Sure, but they’re assholes I’ve known all my life. Guys who I’ve been hanging out with long before people gave a damn about who I was. People like that—who have known you longer than your money and fame—they’re hard to come by. I’m sorry for the crap they say. They’ve never had a filter before. I mean, Kennedy never cared, so…”
“Great. Well, I’m not Kennedy. Maybe you should get back with her.”
Devon doesn’t bother to keep his voice quiet. “Maybe you’re right. You can’t do this. And by this, I mean act like a grown woman and lighten up.”
“Lighten up? Devon, you’ve got me on some roller coaster, and last I checked, I couldn’t handle being spun around without crumbling into a mess. If you actually knew me, you’d know that.”
“So everything is perfect in your world?” He yells at me as he crosses his arms in front of him. “You’re happy with where you are and who you are? It’s all sunshine for you? I’m so glad you’ve got it all figured out. That makes one of us.”
Now I’m livid. He doesn’t know the first thing about what my life’s been like for me—what I go through on a daily basis. “That’s not fair. It’s not that easy for me. And whatever you’re wanting from me—expecting from me, I can’t be that person.” I won’t be. And who’s he to think he’s such a victim here? “And what about you? Huh? Am I supposed to just accept it all? Stealing cars? Drugs? Luring in new girls and claiming them as your own?”
He slowly shakes his head. “Wow. Yeah. That’s me. Because there’s no way I could be genuinely interested in you. No, you’re just something I felt like conquering. Please, keep making these assumptions. The double standard here is fucking poetic.”
“You haven’t giving me much else to work with this week.”
“Apparently not.” He gets up and heads back toward the stairs to leave. “And I’m not starting now.”
“So you dumped him?”
It’s Friday afternoon, and Maddie and I are walking down Rodeo Drive eyeing stores I’ve always avoided in the past. “We were never dating, so no…I didn’t exactly dump him. But I’m pretty sure things are done for good.”
Maddie pulls me into a tiny boutique called LuxRy. If it weren’t for the credit card Celia gave me, one $700 price tag in here would have had me turning and running. Still, I can’t help but be shocked by how expensive everything is.
“You’ve got to look the part, Liv. Embrace it. Be grateful you get to dress cute. I’m stuck in a uniform that makes me feel like a penguin.”
She sifts through the assortment of gowns with the focus and haste of a professional. “An open door to a guy that spectacular, and you slam it shut.” She shakes her head and pulls a green dress off a rack near the back of the sto
re.
“I’d only intended to, I don’t know, prop the door open with a shoe—put things on hold to make sense of it all.”
She puts the green one back and grabs a second dress—a vivid, dark purple one and holds the gown high to show me. The silky fabric falls like a waterfall down her arm. “Ooh!” She squeals and thrusts the dress toward me. “It’s even on sale. Must be a sign. Go try it on.”
I check the tag. Goody, a bargain at $350. Rolling my eyes at Maddie, I take the dress into a fitting room while she returns to the racks to drool over the gowns she won’t be buying. Trying this thing on is terrifying. It feels too delicate, like I’m going to rip it apart as I squeeze into it. But it’s stronger than it looks, and when I see the result in the mirrors…well, Maddie picked a great dress. Maybe too great. The last thing I want to do is stand out at the party. I’m just there to work, and when it’s over, I never have to go back to that house.
I take a breath and prepare for Maddie’s overreaction. She’s already out there waiting for me, wearing a little black dress that makes her golden hair angelic.
I cross my arms in front of me. “What are you doing?”
“What? I can dream.” She reaches over to me, grabbing my hands and stretching my arms out wide. “But you. You look smokin’.”
“You think so? I feel like…like I’m not wearing anything.” The fabric is cool and thin. Blindfolded, I could almost believe I’m naked. This’ll make for an interesting night surrounded by Hollywood’s finest.
We change back into our commoner’s clothing and check out. I hand my dress to the woman at the register, but instead of taking it, she’s just frozen and staring.
Yeah, I know. I don’t look like someone who can afford this thing, and the truth is I can’t. But hello? I’m right here. Ready to pay.
“I’d like to buy this.” I push the dress even closer to her.
She blinks and steps back, taking the dress like she’s just stepped out of a trance. Maddie and I finish paying and leave the store.
