by Dee Mann
Paul and Rob liked DHL because it was never so crowded or loud you couldn't carry on a conversation. That the place offered thirty-six beers and ales on tap, with another three dozen in bottles didn't hurt much either.
"Your favorite Backstreet Boy? You didn't really say that?" Rob's incredulous stare conveyed more than his words.
Paul surveyed the long mahogany and brass bar that ran along the left wall and the lacquered pine tables surrounded by wood chairs comfortably padded with dark, leather cushions that filled most of the rest of the space. "I swear. It just came out. And I can't figure out why. I never even liked the Backstreet Boys." He shook his head. "But it didn't matter. We hit it off, man. We really hit it off. She was so uptight and embarrassed after spilling my coffee but then she just seemed to relax. And after that, there were no games, no posturing. We were just talking and laughing. Really connecting."
Rob screwed his face into a grimace. "Geez, man, you realize you're starting to sound like a girl."
"Up yours. Are you telling me you and Lisa never talked about stuff?" He knew Rob had suggested drinks for a reason and figured it was time to start the poking and prodding.
In response to silence, Paul said, "Look, buddy. I really didn't want to come here tonight. I wanted to head home and call Jillian. If you hadn't practically begged me…you know?"
Rob sighed. "Well, yah, of course. We talked about movies, and food, and sex, and things to do. Stuff like that."
"Maybe that was the problem. Maybe she wanted to talk about more than that. Feelings and stuff. Chick stuff, you know?"
Rob stared into space for a few seconds then sighed, nodding slightly. "Yah, maybe."
"So what's going on there?"
"Same as yesterday. Same as last week. We're on a break. She wanted a break to think about us."
He paused for a few seconds, again shaking his head. "What's there to think about? We go out, we have fun, the sex is great." He grimaced. "It's her friends, I know it's her friends. They don't like me much. They think I'm a troll."
Caught off-guard, Paul almost choked on his beer as he tried hard not to laugh. "A troll?"
"They don't think I'm handsome enough for her. They want her to find some guy who's more in her league. I'm too ordinary for them, which would be okay if I had lots of money, but I don't. I guess I embarrass them. When all the beautiful folk get together they don't want to have to look at commoners."
"Come on, Rob. Lisa is not that shallow. She…"
"I know, I know. But her friends are. And they're at her all the time about me."
"How do you know? You've heard them?"
Rob fidgeted with discomfort. "Two months ago we were at a party. It was a benefit thing for some beavers or possums or something like that. Anyway, I'm standing at the bar waiting for our drinks. Lisa's off with some museum people she knows. These two girls come up behind me talking."
* * *
"So how long has she been seeing him?" Kiki asked.
"Like, a couple of months," her friend Rachel replied. "I can't believe you didn't hear."
"How would I hear? Four months I'm in Paris and did anyone call me? You didn't call me."
"Yes I did. Two weeks after you left. You said you were having très much fun and met this guy François, and just didn't have time to talk because he was waiting for you in the lobby and…"
"Oh…well…yes, now I remember. Well…"
"I decided you'd call if you got lonely. Not that I could imagine you getting lonely in a country full of hot guys."
"Girl, you can not imagine. But that's for another day. So you say she's been seeing him for two months?"
Rachel nodded. "Two or three."
"But why? Does he have this enormous package or something? Or is he, like, really rich? He certainly doesn't dress it if he is."
"I don't know about his package, but he can't have much money. Nobody ever heard of him." She shrugged. "None of us can figure it out."
"Has anyone asked her?"
Rachel didn't even try to hide her disdain. "Of course," she said, then added in a mocking tone, "She said he treats her nice and makes her laugh."
"And that's supposed to make up for his looking like a truck driver? What is Lisa thinking?"
Rob didn't usually listen to chatter or gossip but his ears perked up when he heard Lisa's name. He paid close attention now, as the women continued their conversation.
"I don't know. But she's, like, totally into this guy. Everyone keeps telling her she should dump him and find someone in her own league, you know, because this guy is just so far beneath her. Oh, and you haven't heard the worst yet."
"What could be worse than no money and no looks?
"His name's Roberto something. I think he's from Mexico, or Puerto Rico, or someplace like that."
"No!"
"Yes!" Rob's voice mocked her exclamation.
The bartender had just placed the drinks on the bar. Rob grabbed one in each hand, turned, and smiled at the women.
"Actually, my family is from Ecuador."
Smiling, he introduced himself. "Roberto Tello. It's so nice to meet you. It's good to know Lisa has such warm, caring friends who look out for her best interests even when she's so obviously out of her mind."
Both girls were embarrassed to discover the subject of their gossip had overheard them, but neither appeared contrite. Just the opposite.
"Well, I'm sorry you heard that," Rachel sniffed, "but maybe it was for the best. You have to know that you're just a fling for her." She smiled viciously. "I mean, we all go slumming once in a while."
"Really? We all do that?"
"Those of us who, well, you know."
"Yes, I think I do know."
Not to be left out, Kiki chimed in. "You really should, you know, save yourself a lot of future pain and move on to someone who's more your type. I mean, this thing with you and her can't last. She'll get tired of people making fun of her because of you."
Rob's smile disappeared. Worry lines creased his forehead. "People, her friends you mean, make fun of her because she goes out with me?"
"Yes! All the time!" Her voice lowered as she confided, "You know, people at our level can be, well, mean sometimes."
"No!" Rob appeared confused. "I haven't noticed that at all since we've been together."
"Oh you wouldn't. I mean, we're not uncouth or anything. No one would come right out and say anything if you or she were, like, around. But people do talk and the talk certainly gets back to Lisa."
"Yes, I can imagine." He could no longer hide his contempt. "I guess it is a good thing she has friends like you two who she can count on to keep her abreast of all the mean and hurtful gossip your little minds produce."
Being chastised by someone she considered beneath her was unthinkable and Rachel's glare could have melted steel. "Sure, as if you never say anything about anyone. See, that's what I mean. You think you're as good as she is but you're not. Lisa should have someone who's her equal. Both socially and, ah, visually. You are not that person. And you'll never be that person."
Rob was growing tired of the two snobs, but his honor had been offended, something he could not let pass.
"Well…this was very enlightening. Very enlightening indeed. If you'll excuse me."
He started to walk between them, but appeared to stumble, sending the contents of one of the glasses spilling down the front of Rachel's dress. "Oh my. I'm so sorry. How clumsy of me."
Rachel was livid. "You did that on purpose. You…"
Rob interrupted her. "Please, let me get something to dry you off."
He turned to Kiki and said, "Here, hold this, while I get a towel."
He handed her the drink, which slipped from his fingers, bounced off her hand, and spilled on the front of her dress.
Kiki gave a short scream of dismay.
"Oh dear!" Rob said. "Again! I really am sorry." He turned to the bartender, who winked at him. "May I have some towels please?"
Bo
th women were beside themselves now with fury. They could not believe any man, especially one like him, would treat them this way.
"You asshole!" Rachel seethed, her voice dripping with venom. "You stay away from us. Just remember, Lisa will dump you. And I'll be standing next to her laughing at you when she does."
* * *
Paul's raucous laughter caused a few heads to turn their way. "Are you serious? They really said that stuff? You really did that to both of them? Why did I never hear about this?"
"They did, and I did. When I told Lisa what happened, she couldn't believe I'd actually do something like that."
"I can understand. I'm having trouble believing it myself."
"Well, she insisted I promise never to do that to anyone again, no matter what the provocation, and not to tell anyone else about it." Rob shrugged. "You know Lisa. What else could I do but promise?"
Paul was still chuckling.
"I guess I see why you think her friends may have had something to do with it. All I can say is, I wish I had been there to see it."
Paul extended his hand, palm open and they exchanged slaps twice.
"Do you have to hang around a lot with these people?"
"No, not really. They're not friends like we're friends. Not any more. They're the kids of people in her parent's social circle. They all used to hang out when they were in high school, and I guess many of them still do, but Lisa doesn't really see them much…once in a while at some social thing."
"That would be once in a while too much for me."
"Me, too. But Lisa feels like she has to be friendly for her parents' sake."
"So, you haven't heard from her at all?"
"Not a word. And it's been, like, almost two weeks now. I called a couple of times but got her voice mail. I left a message once, but she never called me back."
"That's tough, dude."
"Yah, well, she said she wanted time alone to think, so I probably shouldn't be surprised. But I miss her, man, you know? We were so good together. I loved how proper she was in public and how wild she could be when we were alone."
He glanced away for a few seconds, trying to gauge whether to risk ridicule by continuing.
Paul read the indecision on his friend's face. "I know what you mean, buddy. It's like a big hole, a big empty place she used to fill, but now…nothing."
"Exactly." He decided to take the risk. "You know when you were talking about coffee girl before, and you said that when you saw her the first time you felt something click. Well, that's what happened to me when I first met Lisa."
"Did you ever tell her?"
"Tell her? No. I don't think I ever really acknowledged it to myself, much less to her. I mean, you know me. I've always been free, having a good time, one girl after another. Do you realize I'd been with Lisa for over five months before this break. Five months! That‘s the longest I've been with one girl since high school. Even then, I wasn't really exclusive with anyone. But with Lisa, it's different." He sighed. "You know, I realized last week that since I've been with her, I never even think about other women."
Paul looked skeptical. "Man, I've seen you ogling…"
"Yah, yah, I know. I look at pretty girls. But it's the damnedest thing. I look, but I never fantasize about what it would be like to be with them anymore."
"Sounds like the ‘L' word to me," Paul said. "Sounds like you have it bad. Did you ever tell her you loved her?"
"Of course, like when we were doing it and stuff."
"That's it?"
"What do you mean?"
Paul was shaking his head. "Rob, how can a man with Latino blood in his veins, a man who's had more women than most men dream of…how can you know so little about them? Are you seriously telling me you only told Lisa you loved her while you were screwing her?"
"No. Sometimes I'd tell her afterward, or before."
Rob was beginning to regret taking that chance. He wasn't comfortable talking about love and emotions. And he really didn't like talking about sex, although he'd engage in bragging banter with other guys when it seemed to be called for.
Paul noticed his friend withdrawing.
"Rob, Lisa is the steadiest, most unassuming girl I've ever met. She's smart, funny, looks great but doesn't seem to care, and, well, you know I could go on and on. Five months ago, for whatever reason I'll never know, she chose you. And until this taking-a-break thing, I thought you two were made for each other. So did everyone else, which is why none of us can figure out what the taking-a-break is all about.
"But now I think I understand. You believe it was her friends dissing you, but from what you say, they'd been doing that right along. No, this is not the fault of her friends, buddy, it's all your fault."
Paul took a swig of his beer, sat back, and waited for a reaction.
Rob looked dazed. After a minute he mumbled, "My fault?"
"Your fault," Paul shot back. "Man, if you want to keep a woman like Lisa you have to work at it. She can have any guy she wants in this town. Hell, she can probably have any guy she wants in the world. But she chose you. Why would she do that?"
"She said I made her laugh, and that I'm nice to her."
"Okay, that's what hooked her, but what kept her coming back for five months?"
"I don't know," Rob replied. "Good times, great sex?"
Paul signaled the bartender to send over another round.
"Rob, she can get that anywhere, and probably in greater quantity and quality."
"Hey…"
"Yah, blah, blah, I know. I've seen you in the shower, buddy. You ain't that special. Look, Lisa saw something in you, something that made her want to stick around. But you never gave her any reason to do so. Women want, no, they need to be told, to be reassured all the time. They need to hear the words, and not just when you're in bed with them. I'd bet money Lisa's trying to decide if you'll ever wake up and realize that being together involves more than fun and games, especially if she's thinking long term. You know what I mean about long-term?"
Rob nodded. "Yah, I guess so. But it's too late now. I can feel it. If she hasn't called in two weeks, she's not going to. Not until she gets up the nerve to tell me it's over for good."
"You don't know that."
"Yes I do."
"No, you don't. But what have you done the past two weeks to help her decide? You've done nothing but leave one message on her machine. What do you think that's telling her? It's telling her you don't care enough to pursue her."
"She said she didn't want to talk to me, she wanted the time alone."
"Bullshit. She wants you to come after her, to show her that you really want her, and not just for sex and smartass. She's waiting for you to decide if you really want her for the long haul. She's waiting for you to do something, you dope."
"Do what? What can I do?"
"What can you do? Are you serious? Send her flowers, call her and tell her how much you miss her. And leave that message if she doesn't answer the phone. Camp out on her door step. Invite her out to talk. Tell her you love her, stupid."
Paul punched Rob in the arm. "Tell her and show her how much you love her."
7:35 PM
Jillian opened her door and waited for her friends to hike up the twenty-one stairs to her floor.
She'd spent the forty-five minutes between hanging up with Liz and her friends' arrival vacuuming her already clean rugs, washing and polishing her already spotless bathroom fixtures, and setting dishes, glasses, and chopsticks on the burled oak coffee table she'd rescued from the trash last year and had spent an entire weekend restoring to beauty. It rested in front of the sofa which was nestled in the large window bay.
The girls bounced up the stairs whispering to each other, then hurried down the short hall when they noticed her waiting for them.
"Jilli's got a boyfriend, Jilli's got a boyfriend," Jenna sang as she pranced through the door and hung her jacket on a peg. "Liz and I discussed it on the way over and we decided we really don't want
to know anything about him. We'd rather watch a movie."
Liz nodded her agreement as she set the bag full of aromatic Thai food on the bar separating the kitchen from the rest of the studio.
"Oh, well, if you really don't want to hear about him…"
Just then, the CD Jillian had started earlier played the last chords of I Believe In You And Me and restarted with Always and Forever. The dreamy expression returned as her eyes slowly closed, and she began swaying slightly with the music, her thoughts suddenly far from friends and food.
Liz and Jenna exchanged astonished stares. Jillian was the practical one, not usually given to overly romantic flights of fancy. They watched her for a minute, grinning and pointing, mouthing silent questions and replies to each other.
"Okay," Jenna said, no longer able to keep silent. "Enough of this game. Anyone who can make her do that I have to hear about."
7:45 PM
Halfway through their third beer, the two had pretty much talked-out the Lisa situation. They'd been sitting quietly for a few minutes, each lost in his own thoughts.
Paul glanced at his watch, ready to split.
Man, I hate leaving him here like this, but I really want to get home and call Jillian. Why the hell is he just sitting there? I'd have been out of here long ago looking for her. It's like he really doesn't think he can do anything. But how can he not at least try?
He was about to tell Rob it was time to go when he noticed two women walk in. The shorter one waved their way as they approached the table.
"Hi Rob. Sorry we're late. We took the train and something happened and we sat there, stopped, for almost twenty minutes."
She leaned over to give Rob a short kiss. Perplexed, Paul's glare demanded to know what was going on.
"Hey, Debbie." He turned to the other girl. "You must be Marianne." When she nodded, he said, "Hi, I'm Rob and this is Paul."
