by Lexi Blake
“Yeah, I thought so. I had to perform an autopsy on a twenty-one-year-old girl today. The sheriff and I had to talk to her mother. We had to inform a mother that the child she carried in her womb is gone. The child she loved and nurtured, the child who should have buried her is gone from this earth.” The doctor’s voice shook. His eyes had welled up in righteous anger, and Alexei’s teared up in shame.
“I am sorry.” It was all he could think to say.
“Yeah, I can see that. It won’t bring her back.” The doctor turned. He pointed at the sheriff. “You get that asshole out of my town, Nate.”
The sheriff spoke quietly, as though trying to placate the other man. “The feds are coming for him. The roads are keeping them out of here tonight, but they should make it by tomorrow night. Until then, he’s going to stay right there in his cozy cell.”
The doctor huffed and stormed out as quickly as he’d rushed in.
Callie’s big brown eyes stared at him sympathetically. “Please forgive Caleb. He lost his wife a few years ago, and his family no longer speaks to him. Once he was a highly paid surgeon. Well, I won’t tell you that story, but he’s got a lot of anger. Don’t take it personally.”
“He is right.” Self-recrimination tasted bitter on his tongue. He deserved whatever these feds gave him. He deserved whatever hell waited on him.
A soft hand covered his own. He heard Zane curse, but Callie simply tightened her fingers over his hand. “Tell me something, do you honestly believe that you would have stood there and allowed this Ivan person to kill that girl?”
He didn’t recognize himself anymore. And he had no idea what the word honest meant in reference to his own life. He’d lived a lie for so long. “I don’t know.”
Her breath came out in a tiny sigh. “I do. I know you’ve been through some bad things, but deep in your heart, you’re good and worthy, and you can fix the things you’ve done wrong. You would have stopped him. You would have saved her.”
Tears fell from his eyes. The room seemed oddly still. Only Callie’s voice meant anything in that moment. “You do not know me. How can you possibly know what I do?”
“Because you saved me.” She leaned down and placed a single chaste kiss on the back of his hand. “Because you saved Jen. And because you saved my baby.”
The men in the room gasped. Their deep, shocked voices were one. “Callie?”
She smiled at Alexei before turning, opening her arms wide. She nodded, her voice choked with emotion. “I took a test this morning. Three, actually. I was going to tell you this evening. We’re finally pregnant.”
The men crowded her, their arms forming walls around her. They squeezed her tight, kissing and nuzzling her.
Alexei watched the scene. He no longer cared that theirs was obviously an odd relationship. They loved, and it filled the room. They loved, and it filled him with longing. He had absolutely no one who would put their arms around him and shut the world out. He’d given up even the chance of love for the pursuit of revenge, and suddenly it seemed like a terrible thing to have missed out on.
He let his head rest against the cold metal bars. He would probably see a lot of metal bars in his future. An image of that pretty waitress slid across his mind. Holly. He would never have a chance to date a nice woman like Holly. He would be lucky if he survived at all.
“Hey.” A gruff voice pulled him from his misery.
He looked up, and Zane’s hand was out. It took him a moment to realize what the other man was asking for.
“You are sure?” Alexei had to ask. It felt wrong to simply accept that hand. The man should be sure.
“Yeah.”
Tentatively, he put his hand in Zane’s. He wouldn’t have been surprised if it had been a trick. He wouldn’t have been shocked if Zane had used his hold to pull him through the bars and bash his skull against them. A part of him kind of wished he would do it, but that large hand strongly pumped his own.
“Thank you. I don’t know why you did it, and I don’t care. You saved our wife and our baby. I don’t think I can ever repay you for that.”
Emotion choked him. One good thing. He’d managed one good thing. He would have to settle for that. He wasn’t sure if it would save his soul, but it began to make it feel lighter. “I am glad I do this.”
“I’m calling Logan.” The sheriff hadn’t taken his hands off his wife. “I want to go home, Zane. I want to show our wife how well we’re going to take care of her.” He kissed the top of her head and walked to his desk.
Fifteen minutes later, they left, their arms around one another. The lanky deputy took over.
“You okay in there?” Logan’s face was open and slightly curious. He was young, so young, to have a badge on his chest.
Was he okay? Perhaps not, but he was more okay than he’d been in years. His future looked bleak, but he had a chance to be something more than he’d become. He could not erase past mistakes, but maybe, just maybe, he could find a way to earn forgiveness.
“Yes. I am good.”
The young man smiled. “All right, then. I’m the night shift. I’ll probably fall asleep at some point in time. Just bang on the bars if you need something.”
“Yes, I will bang bars.” He wouldn’t need anything. He settled himself on the cot, feeling lighter than he had in years. The oppressive sadness he’d felt was gone, only remnants clinging to remind him of his past mistakes.
“Oh, and your cell phone’s been ringing. I know I’m not supposed to, but did you need to talk to someone?”
It must be a mistake. Everyone he knew was either dead or half a world away. It didn’t matter. He lay down on the cot and pulled the covers up around his chest. It could be his cousin, but he wouldn’t worry Nick with his troubles. “No. There is no one to call me. Ignore this.”
Logan tipped his hat, a grin curling his lips up. “Can do. I’m really good at ignoring stuff. Only thing I’m better at is avoiding work.”
The deputy sat down in his chair. He propped his feet on his desk and leaned back. He tipped his hat over his face and was asleep in no more than five minutes.
Alexei stared at the ceiling, the events of the day playing through his mind, and a deep sense of relief spread through his body. Deep in the night he heard the cell phone buzzing from its place in the small locker where the sheriff had placed all his personal items at the time of his booking. He ignored the sound. After a long while, he fell asleep and dreamed about what it would be like to have a best friend and a wife. He dreamed about how it would feel to share a life.
* * * *
Jen woke and stretched, her limbs deliciously sore from repeated and vigorous sexual encounters with the man she could only think of after last night as her boyfriend. A smile stretched across her face. He’d said it. He’d said I love you.
Oh, he’d looked terrified at the prospect, but he’d said it, and he hadn’t taken it back or tried to pretend like it was a friendly thing. No, he’d said it and held her and let her fall asleep in his arms and then promptly woke her up twice more in the night for some rough sex.
She might need to take up yoga. Nell taught a class at the rec center. Maybe limbering up would help her keep up with her old man. She winced inwardly. Never call him that. She couldn’t tease him about their age difference.
A heavenly scent wafted into the room, and Jen opened her eyes to discover she wasn’t alone.
“Whoa!” She pulled the covers up because she was looking at someone she hadn’t expected.
“Good morning, Miss Jennifer.”
Mrs. Truss was a solidly built woman of roughly sixty-five years with a perfectly upper-crust British accent. The older woman smiled down at her and placed a mug of what smelled like coffee on the nightstand.
“Good morning.” Jen glanced around the room. It looked like Stef had put up all the toys they had played with last night, but they were still in a dungeon. The woman’s grandmotherly smile and crisp white apron was incongruous in a room that had a whippin
g chair, a doctor’s table with a TENS unit, and a St. Andrew’s Cross.
“Don’t you feel self-conscious, Miss Jennifer. I’ve been cleaning up after Master Stefan’s parties for years. I received thorough training on how to take care of all the toys and sterilize them.”
Dear god, Stef had hired Mary Poppins to watch after his collection of vibrators. “I am so sorry.”
Her laughter trilled through the air. “Not at all, dear. The master is a bit odd when it comes to his sexual proclivities, but he’s a dear boy. I’ve been with him since he turned sixteen. Miss Stella hired me to take care of the house.”
Her curiosity was on full alert. Carefully keeping the covers around her, she sat up and grabbed the coffee. “Stella hired you?”
“Yes. Stella practically raised the master, you know. After his father left, Stella took over. His father hired a few nannies, but Stella watched them like a hawk after one left Stef alone for a weekend. She was only in her twenties herself back then, and she’d never had children, but she loved Master Stefan like he was her own.”
Stef had been lucky. Stella was a natural mother. It had always been confusing to her why someone with as much love to give as Stella had never gotten married. As far as she could tell, Stella never even dated. She’d thrown herself into her business and caring for the people around her.
“Why did Stella take over? Max and Rye’s mom was alive then. So was Callie’s mom. That would have made more sense.”
She shrugged. “I have my theories, but nothing concrete. Stella felt a deep connection to the young boy. He felt it, too. I came in to let you know that Master Stefan is having breakfast. I don’t believe he wanted to wake you, but I thought it might be a good idea if you joined him. He’s dining with his father, you see.”
That could go poorly, and the last thing she needed was for Stef to screw things up with his dad. It had become apparent that part of Stef’s problem was his unresolved conflict with his father. She wanted to be there to referee.
“Thanks, Mrs. Truss. I would very much like to join the Talbot men.”
The older woman nodded her head as though satisfied. She started out the door but turned. “Oh, and you have a call. It’s on hold. I had it transferred out here. When you’re ready, pick up the phone on the nightstand, and it should come on. I’ll let the cook know to set up another place. I’m happy you’re here, Miss Jennifer. I think you’ll be perfect for the master.”
The door closed behind her, and Jen picked up the phone, wondering who would call her here. Everyone she knew would call her cell phone.
“Hello?” Jen asked, holding the phone to her ear.
Ten minutes later, soul utterly deflated, she got dressed and placed another call, this one to Callie Hollister-Wright. After arranging her transportation, she walked out of the guesthouse. She made her way to the main house and the breakfast room, her heart sick. She had to face Stef.
For the last time.
Chapter Sixteen
“Have you thought at all about what I said to you yesterday, Stefan?”
Stef looked up from his coffee as his father took the seat across the table from him. Had he thought about what his father had told him? He’d been awake all night thinking about his relationship with Jennifer, and his father’s words had played in his head over and over again.
His mother had been certain she wanted a family. His father had said it himself. She’d been sure she wanted children, had pushed him for marriage and kids. Would it be the same with his Jennifer? Would he marry her and then be left behind when she realized how big the world was?
“Of course,” he said smoothly to his father. He found he’d softened toward him sometime in the night. He’d finally felt a true kinship with the man. They both loved women who could break them in two. “I want you to know that I don’t blame you. You wouldn’t have been happy here in Bliss. I understand and I appreciate that you were willing to let me stay. It would have been easy for you to force me to go back to Dallas. I’m truly glad I stayed here.”
His father’s face flushed. “Yes, you made a family for yourself here. I can see that. But you’re wrong. I would have been very happy in Bliss. I was simply too afraid to stay.”
“Afraid?”
His father’s hands slipped around the mug of coffee in front of him. He took a drink before sighing and sitting back. His eyes were heavy as he spoke. “Yes, I was afraid. I told you yesterday that I made a mistake in not staying here with you. I deeply regret it, and I hope you won’t make the same mistake I did.”
The food in front of Stef suddenly didn’t seem as appetizing as it had before. He’d meant to come to the main house, grab some food, and rejoin Jennifer in the bed they had shared the night before. He’d meant to feed her from his hands and more than likely make love again. He’d realized the minute he walked into the house that he needed a bit of space. The night before he’d thought about keeping her in Bliss. He was making decisions based on his own needs rather than hers. He was heading down the same path that had ruined his father’s life.
“I don’t intend to make the same mistake.” He forced himself to pick up his fork. “Why do you think I’ve made the arrangements I’ve made?”
Studying in France would give her the time she needed to make an informed decision. Of course she thought she wanted to get married and start a family. He knew Jennifer’s history. Her mother had been a bit of a drifter. Jennifer had gone to ten different public schools. It made sense that she would want roots, but she had no idea how successful she could be, how important her work could be. She should know all the facts before she decided how her life would go. It was the greatest gift he could give her.
Sebastian’s hands came down on the table, causing it to shake. “You do not understand me. You are making the same mistake. You’re walking out on a woman you love.”
Stef sat back, his father’s outburst shaking him a bit. The man had never raised his voice before. “Mom left you, Dad.”
“I’m not talking about your mother. I’m talking about Stella.”
The fork dropped from his hand. “What the hell does that mean?”
“This is what I’ve been trying to discuss with you. You think the biggest mistake I made was marrying your mother, but it’s not true. I was impetuous when I married your mother. She was lovely, and I thought it was time to get married. Your grandfather had turned over the reins of the company to me, and then he died. Mother had died the year before him. I missed my parents terribly. I threw myself into the relationship with Jackie. I wanted so badly to rebuild the family I had lost that I convinced myself I could love her. It wasn’t until I met Stella Benoit that I realized I had no idea what it truly meant to love a woman.”
Stef sat back, shocked at the way his father’s entire being softened at the mention of Stella’s name. Had his father really had this whole life he’d never known about? Somehow, he’d thought his father simply worked. He’d always believed his father’s deepest relationship was with the company he ran. He’d never thought about his father’s heartaches past the wife who had left him.
“I met Stella the day we came to Bliss. You won’t remember, but I didn’t mean to stay here. We were going to visit my sister in Las Vegas. It was only chance that the car broke down here. It was only luck that a large section of land had just gone up for sale.”
Stef searched his memory. He had a sudden image of himself as a child, a bit lost and tired from the long car trip. He’d been relieved when the car had died. His father had taken him to a diner. His feet couldn’t touch the ground from the booth. He’d sat there swinging his feet back and forth, back and forth. “It was supposed to be a hotel. A ski resort.”
“Yes. And we were only supposed to stay for the three days it would take to fix the car.” His father relaxed into his story. “I actually thought about calling to have another car delivered. I was going to make the call while we sat and had lunch, but those boys walked in. They walked up and asked if you wanted to
play. It was the first time I’d seen you smile in a month.”
Max and Rye. Oh, he remembered that. They’d been grubby and disheveled from sleeping in the woods for days. They had explained that they were mountain men. Their momma let them sleep in a tent on the mountain they lived on. It had sounded like a magnificent thing to do.
“While you played with the Harper boys, I talked to the owner of the diner,” his father continued. “A few days turned into a week, a week into a month, and I bought the land from the hotel developers at twice the price.”
And Stef had rarely left since. He’d gone on trips. He went to Paris and London. He’d traveled across Europe and Asia. He’d studied in New York, but Bliss was his home, his heart and soul.
Not really his heart anymore. Jennifer was his heart.
“Why did you leave? If you loved her, why did you leave?”
A look of infinite sadness spread across his father’s face. “I was afraid. When your mother left, I was devastated. I felt like the world was ripped out from under me. I put everything on hold. Stella was beautiful, but in every other way she was different from your mother. In every way but one.”
“She was young.”
“She was twenty-two years old when I met her. She was working the diner with her mother. She was even younger than Jackie. And I loved her more than I had imagined possible. I was in so deep with her. I told myself that it was a rebound fling. I fooled myself into thinking it was casual, but one night about a year in, I almost asked her to marry me.” He put a fist to his mouth as if to stop some great emotion that might come out. “I couldn’t. I couldn’t do it again. She said all the right things. She said she wanted to be your mother and wanted to have more kids. And I broke it off with her that night. I believed she was too young to make that decision. I left soon after.”
