by Rachel Wells
‘Not literally,’ she said, as if she understood me. ‘Sorry Alfie, but I’m going to bed and I think I’m going to stay there for the rest of the day.’ She left the room. I looked after her wistfully. My humans were complicated, that was for sure. I was beginning to feel as if I would never fully get to understand any of them.
I went to Jonathan’s, as Claire was clearly not going to be any fun at all today, but he still wasn’t home. I wondered if he’d come home and then gone out early but my breakfast dishes were still on the floor; he clearly hadn’t thought about feeding me at all. I fleetingly wondered if I should worry, but then Jonathan wasn’t the sort of man you worried about. If I could take care of myself then he certainly could. But I didn’t like the fact that he hadn’t been home at all since he left for work in the morning. And I particularly didn’t like the fact that he hadn’t given me a second thought, otherwise he wouldn’t have made me miss two meals. I wondered what I could do to convey my anger to him.
I was about to give up on him and leave. Obviously I couldn’t reward his behaviour with another gift, so I thought that if I walked out on him the way he walked out on me, then maybe he would understand what it felt like. But as I was about to head out, I heard the door open and in he walked, in his work clothes, but looking quite fresh regardless. Nothing like Claire, that was for sure.
‘Alfie, sorry,’ he said, petting me and smiling at me in a way I hadn’t quite seen him do before. ‘I hope you’re not too hungry – I didn’t expect to be gone so long.’ I miaowed angrily, in a way that said he certainly wasn’t forgiven, and yes, I was expecting him to be there for me; after all, he didn’t know I had already eaten.
‘Oh, Alfie, you’re a man of the world. You know how it is when you get lucky,’ he winked. I blinked, then looked at him through narrowed eyes. I didn’t know how it was. I certainly wasn’t that sort of cat. He laughed.
‘If I didn’t know better, I’d say you disapproved.’ He laughed again. His phone beeped. He read something and smiled. I wondered if he was still drunk like Claire had been last night, because he wasn’t himself. He definitely seemed happy, but maybe a little bit crazy. ‘Sorry, of course you’re hungry. I’ll get you some food.’ He looked a bit puzzled as he picked up my empty plates and then he fetched me some prawns. They might be one of my favourite things but I wasn’t going to be won over that easily.
All the while I ate, he played with his phone. He would type something, it would beep and he’d smile and type something else. I actually found it all irritating; in my mood I would have preferred to dine in peace.
‘Alfie,’ he said finally. ‘I like the woman I went out with last night. I’ve known her for a while, although not well, but I saw her again last week. Anyway, she’s attractive, funny, smart and has a good job. I actually think I may be a bit “in like” with her.’ I refused to look at him and concentrated on my dwindling prawns.
‘Oh come on, you can’t be mad at me forever. Surely you can be happy for me?’ I felt my fur prick up as I wanted to tell him that I surely couldn’t, if it meant I was going to be forgotten about. I could really, if it meant he wasn’t sad any more, although I wasn’t ready to let him know that! ‘Look, this is why I didn’t want a cat. I’m free and easy and if I want to stay out, I should be able to. I don’t mind when you stay out all night, for God’s sake. I’m a grown up, Alfie.’ Still I didn’t turn round. ‘Oh, Alfie, just get over it. Next time I’m going out I’ll bring her back here.’ I turned around, but I didn’t give him a smile. ‘And why the hell am I apologising to a bloody cat?’ Jonathan looked bemused.
I gave him an indignant look, then I stalked out of the cat flap. But as soon as I stood outside, I realised it was raining. I hadn’t thought about the weather, being too cross to do so, but what a predicament I’d put myself in. Claire was asleep, Jonathan was in the dog house, and so I had no alternative but to get wet, which I hated, and walk down the street to the flats at number 22.
Feeling extremely disapproving of both Claire and Jonathan – Margaret had certainly never got up to such antics – I thought that perhaps it was time to step up my charm offensive with both Franceska and Polly. Maybe they would be more reliable.
As luck would have it, I struck gold. Matt, Polly’s husband, was pushing the pram into the house as I arrived, allowing me to sneak in.
‘Oh, hello Alfie,’ he said, and I felt quite chuffed, both that he spoke to me and that I was in the dry. He took his shoes off and left the pram just inside the door. I purred.
‘Shush,’ he said, quietly. ‘I’ve just got Henry off to sleep. Polly is having a much-needed lie-in. Come in and I’ll get you a towel to dry you off and give you some milk.’ I followed him into their small, but very neat, kitchen. He grabbed a tea towel and rubbed me down which was very nice, before pulling some milk out of the fridge and filling the kettle. I felt companionship developing between us as he quietly put some milk in a bowl for me, giving me a gentle pat. I lapped the milk as quietly as I could while Matt made himself a drink. He took it through to the living room and I joined him. We sat, side by side, on the sofa. He picked up a book to read and I just sat, quietly, showing him that I was able to be a good cat. I curled up, and after a while I started dozing off. I was roused a short while later by Polly appearing.
‘How long did I sleep for? Where’s Henry?’ She sounded panicked.
‘It’s fine, darling. He’s asleep in the pram and you probably got a couple of hours’ kip.’
‘But doesn’t he need feeding?’
‘He had breakfast, and it’s not lunchtime yet. Pol, he’s over six months so he can probably start having more regular feeding times.’
‘That’s what the health visitor said. And Franceska.’
‘So they’re probably right, then. Can I make you a cup of tea?’
‘Thanks, that would be lovely.’ Matt got up and Polly sat down next to me.
‘Hello, cat,’ she said stiffly. I tried to raise my eyes; she knew my name. ‘Sorry, Alfie,’ she corrected. I was sure that I was getting quite good at communicating with these humans, but then I was getting a lot of practice. She reached over and lightly touched my fur. I stayed still. Polly seemed afraid of me, but then, she seemed afraid of everything. One observation I had made was that she was definitely afraid of her baby. She seemed terrified of tiny Henry.
Matt returned with the tea and put it on the coffee table in front of her. He picked me up and sat down, putting me on his lap.
‘I hope that Henry isn’t allergic to his fur,’ Polly said.
‘Of course he isn’t. Mum had a cat and we were round there all the time.’
‘Oh yes, I’d forgotten,’ Polly replied. She looked vague. Matt’s brow creased and he didn’t look happy.
‘Polly, are you OK? I mean really? I know this move has been a huge upheaval and I didn’t realise I’d be working so much straight away, but I’m worried about you.’
‘I’m fine.’ She looked around the room with an expression on her face that seemed to say she had no idea where she was. It was still quite bare, the same as when they moved in. Apart from the sofa, chair and trunk table, the room was quite sparse. Even with the baby mat and toys on the floor it still didn’t seem like a home, nothing like next door. ‘It’s just hard and I’m tired,’ she continued. ‘I’m tired and I’m homesick and although I have Franceska now, I do feel lonely. I miss my family.’ It was the most I’d heard her say, even to Franceska.
‘I’ll do anything to help you,’ Matt said. ‘Maybe we can go home soon, would you like that? Or if you really want to, you and Henry can go and see your mum for a week. I could drive you up on Sunday and pick you up the following weekend.’ He looked a bit pleased with himself.
‘So you want to get rid of us, do you?’ Her voice was filled with panic.
‘No, I’d miss you both, of course, but I just thought you’d like to spend some time with your mum.’ Polly glared at Matt but further conversation was interrupted by Hen
ry’s loud wails.
‘I’ll feed him.’
‘Do you want me to make up some baby rice or formula?’ Matt asked. He sounded very sad; defeated even.
‘No, my breasts are hurting. I’ll feed him.’ She disappeared and I could hear Henry’s wails all the way to the bedroom. I heard the door close and then it went quiet. Matt sighed, and looked as if he was far away. It was similar to the way that Franceska looked sometimes. He started stroking me absently, and although I knew he was thinking about other things, I enjoyed it all the same.
After a while, Polly returned with Henry. She put him down on the mat and he started grabbing at his toys.
‘We need to encourage him to start sitting up on his own,’ she said.
‘OK, well I’ll put some cushions behind him.’ Matt started arranging cushions, he looked grateful for something to do. He then propped Henry up, coaxing him to try to sit by rattling toys in front of him. Henry liked this game and started giggling. Matt laughed, and even Polly smiled. I wished they would take a photo so they could look at it and remember that they were a happy family; because for that moment they looked like one.
‘Right, Pol, shall we go and get ourselves a smaller pushchair, so we can get rid of that bloody monster truck?’ Matt suggested, after Henry had given up with the sitting game and was lying on his back again, studying his feet.
‘Yes, we can walk down to that shop Franceska and I found the other day.’ She perked up a bit.
‘Shall I take him in the sling?’ Polly nodded and they started to busy themselves getting ready.
I took this as my cue to leave. I watched them walk down the street and then I miaowed really loudly outside Franceska’s house. But there was no sign of anyone and there were no lights on in the house. It looked like they had gone out. It seemed everyone had somewhere to go but me.
So instead, I went to visit Tiger. The community I was building wasn’t just made up of my new families, it also included fellow cats. Now, at last, if ever I was in need, I had a support network to fall back on and it was growing stronger by the minute. Not that I would ever be in trouble again, but just in case …
‘So what do you want to do?’ Tiger asked.
‘Let’s go to the pond by the park and look at our reflections.’ It was one of my favourite new pastimes. Tiger and I would stand on the bank, as close to the pond as we dared go, and we would look at ourselves in the water. We looked so funny as the water distorted us; it was a very pleasant way to spend the afternoon.
We then explored the back gardens in the street, jumping fences and sheds and having a fun old time without any of the nonsense I’d been subjected to lately.
‘Oh, look at that funny small dog,’ Tiger pointed out. We hissed loudly at him, from our vantage point on a fence, and he yapped, running around in circles in his back garden. It was good, innocent fun. I enjoyed being with Tiger, she was good company today; very compliant, not too loud and generally entertaining to be with.
As I entered Jonathan’s house one evening a few days later, I was struck by a delicious smell. I found Jonathan in the kitchen, doing something I had never seen him do before; cooking. There was a bottle of wine open on the side and he had a bottle of his beer next to him.
‘Hi Alfie. Have you forgiven me yet?’ he asked. I purred. I hadn’t seen much of him over the past couple of days but I had forgiven him, on the proviso that I would get a good dinner out of it. As much as I liked the others, he gave me the best food. He went to the fridge and took out an open packet of salmon. He dished some out for me and smiled warmly. I narrowed my eyes at him; there was something different about him but I couldn’t put my paw on it. Instead, I ate and then took a place on the windowsill in the kitchen, where I could watch him and look outside as well.
I enjoyed watching him cook. He had changed his clothes, and looked nice in a white shirt and pair of jeans. He also smelt good. He whistled as he cooked, and he had this new energy about him; what a cat would liken to having a spring in their step.
The doorbell rang and Jonathan seemed to bounce towards the front door. I waited. After a while he returned with a woman in tow and I understood his mood. She was tall and slim, with long auburn hair. She was wearing jeans and a white shirt, dressed a bit like him, actually. She didn’t look like the type of women I’d seen here before, that was for sure. She was attractive but not like his other women. I guess she was more groomed and not falling out of her clothes. ‘Philippa, can I get you a glass of wine?’
‘That would be lovely, thank you.’ Her voice was very posh.
‘Red or white?’
‘Um, red please.’ He gestured to her to take a seat at the kitchen table and delivered a glass of wine to her.
‘Thank you.’
I was still on the windowsill, but she hadn’t looked at me. I miaowed to let her know I was here.
‘Is that a cat?’ she asked.
‘What?’ I thought. ‘Of course I’m a cat. What a stupid question.’
‘Yes, that’s Alfie,’ Jonathan replied.
‘You don’t strike me as a cat man,’ she said dryly, and again I felt insulted.
‘He kind of came with the house. And although I didn’t think I wanted any kind of pet, let alone a cat, I’m really fond of him.’ I preened myself. Take that, you mean woman; Jonathan really did like me.
‘I don’t like cats,’ she said. I couldn’t believe my ears; I wanted to scratch her but I knew that was the wrong thing to do. ‘Don’t see the point of them at all.’ I waited for Jonathan to step in and defend me.
‘I suppose if I had a snake or a lizard, that would seem more manly,’ he joked.
‘Or even a dog. But a cat?’
‘He’s all right, you’ll get used to him, I did. More wine?’
I was so upset that I jumped off the windowsill and hissed as loudly as I could, before stalking out.
‘Look, you’ve upset him now,’ Jonathan said, laughing rather than sounding cross, like he should have done.
‘He’s a bloody cat, for God’s sake.’ Those were the last words I heard as I strode out of the house.
I spent the next few evenings with Claire, who hadn’t been herself since the whole drunken incident. She still went to work every day, but she looked sad when she came home in the evenings and although I didn’t know why, I paid her extra attention for a few days. I didn’t know exactly what she needed but I made sure she knew that I was there for her. That I would do anything to make sure she was OK.
Just as we were having supper together, her phone rang. She looked at the screen, blinked and then answered it.
‘Hello.’ She looked a bit shocked. ‘Oh Joe, hi.’ There was a pause. I couldn’t hear what he was saying. ‘I am so sorry about the other night, I was so drunk and I don’t normally drink like that.’ No, she didn’t, in all fairness. She might have liked her wine but I hadn’t seen her that bad before.
They chatted for a bit longer, and as they did, a huge smile began to form on her face. When she hung up, she picked me up and cuddled me as if I was a rag doll.
‘Oh Alfie, I didn’t mess up. He’s coming here for dinner tomorrow night. Goodness, I really thought I’d made a fool of myself. Oh God, what am I going to wear? What am I going to cook? I haven’t had a date for years. Years! Oh, crikey. I have to call Tash.’ She jumped up and danced around the room a bit.
I was trying to help but it seemed that a phone call from a man she barely knew could do more than I ever could! Humans. They were definitely, absolutely, beyond even my advanced comprehension.
I stopped to watch Tiger trying and failing to catch birds as I made my way to Jonathan’s. I’d left Claire on the phone to Tasha; she was full of excitement. As I continued on to Jonathan’s, I wondered what I would find there. As I walked through the cat flap the kitchen was clean, but empty. I went into the living room and there he was, on the phone.
‘That’s OK, I enjoyed cooking for you.’ There was a pause. ‘I’m frantic at work t
oo but how about Wednesday?’ Another pause. ‘Brilliant, I’ll book a restaurant, see you then, Philippa.’ He hung up and seemed to notice me.
‘Alfie, my mate,’ he said, affectionately scooping me up onto his lap. ‘I am feeling very happy right now. I think I told you that I knew Philippa years ago, before I went to Singapore. We were both with other people, actually she was living with one of my old work colleagues. So imagine how I felt when I bumped into her and we’re both single! Honestly, having a cat might not be very manly, but I’m pretty sure you’re my good luck charm.’ He laughed and then went to get ready for his ‘gym’.
I felt like a bit of a yo-yo as I headed back to Claire’s. She was sitting at the kitchen table writing something.
‘Hello, babes,’ she said, and I almost looked around until I realised she was talking to me. I sat on the chair next to her and wished I could read as she scribbled away. The doorbell rang and she went to the door, returning with Tasha.
‘Thank you so much for coming round, honestly, you are such a good friend.’
‘Not really, I should have insisted you came home with me, rather than leaving you that night.’ Tasha gave me a cuddle.
‘I was so drunk.’
‘I was, too, which is why I left you with the others. Anyway, it’s all OK. Joe obviously likes you, you like him, and you have a date tomorrow.’
‘I feel like a giggly teenager. But I’m also terrified. Oh, God. Anyway, now that you’re here, this is what I was going to cook.’ They both looked at her list. ‘I have no idea if he likes Italian food but homemade lasagne and a green salad … I know it’s not very exciting, but it should work, don’t you think?’
‘I think it’s great, and he won’t care about the food when he sees what you’re wearing.’
‘But I don’t know what I’m wearing!’ Claire protested.
‘Come upstairs, you soon will.’ They both giggled.
I followed them into Claire’s bedroom where Claire and I plonked ourselves down on the bed and Tasha opened the wardrobe and began trawling through her clothes.
