by Sam Destiny
Tammy’s eyes finally shrank to slits as if only then she noticed something being off.
“This jacket smells awfully familiar, and it’s a guy’s jacket,” she pointed out.
“Mason Stiles drove me home. He found me walking down the street.” Taylor bent to retrieve her bag, careful to avoid her sister’s eyes. “Did you know he and Ash had been a couple?” Tammy must’ve known yet never mentioned it to her. Then again, maybe she just figured Taylor didn’t care anymore. After all, she had walked away. “You know, never mind.” She waved it off, reconsidering the question.
“Mason, huh? I could’ve picked you up. I just didn’t know when you’d be arriving and –”
“I wanted to walk, Tam,” Taylor interrupted.
Her sister just stared at her while Taylor took off the jacket, righting it on the coat rack. She felt the gaze burning on her back, and it made letting go of that tiny piece of Mason almost impossible.
“You were afraid,” her little sister guessed, and again, Taylor couldn’t get around noticing that her little sister was way too serious for her age.
“I’m no longer the country bumpkin people remember. Coming back here is like walking into everything I used to be and everything I wanted to leave behind. Besides, you have every right to hate me, and I wasn’t sure you really wanted me back.” She willed herself to stop talking. She wanted Tammy to stop worrying and be the young woman she should be, while Taylor would be the adult this household needed. They weren’t equals when it came to that.
“I wanted you back every damn day but not like this! Oh, Lori.” Tamara wrapped her arms around Taylor from behind, squeezing her before following her movements with her eyes as Taylor finally let go of the jacket.
“So Mason, of all people, found you?”
Taylor faced her sister again, arching a brow at the hidden meaning in Tammy’s tone.
Her sister grinned guiltily. “You’re town talk. Everyone expected you and him to be a couple, but it didn’t happen. When I’m in town and he’s there, too, everyone goes out of their way to mention how he really had deserved that Collins’ girl to be happy,” Tammy explained.
“We never were a couple. People don’t know what they’re talking about. Stiles and I were friends, and now, he’s driving around with Ashley’s pictures in his truck. All that aside, I’m not here to rekindle old love interests. I’m here for my family.”
“And you have Andrew.” It was a statement and not a question, but Taylor felt like answering anyway.
“Andrew and I are over. Now, Tim, are you still here?” she called, trying to chicken out of the subject.
“Here, I picked!” their little brother answered. Taylor shrugged at her younger sister, and then she went in search of the starving pizza-boy. She just needed to distract Tammy long enough until said subject was forgotten.
Two weeks. That was how long Taylor managed to avoid errands in Sunburn. Tammy had done the shopping while Taylor had thoroughly cleaned the house – twice. The only room she had left untouched was her parents’ bedroom. Tammy was sure it was where Taylor slept, but Taylor didn’t have the heart to correct her. She knew it was absurd, but she felt as if her own ten-year-old self was back the moment she tried to open the door. Her parents had never allowed them to go inside, and it prompted Taylor to sleep on the living room sofa, taking care that she was up before anyone else in the house woke. Their parents had transformed her bedroom into a cramped study the moment she had turned her back on her hometown.
“Timothy Collins, get down here!” She stood waiting at the bottom of the stairs. Tammy had left for college the day before. To Taylor’s relief, she hadn’t brought up the topic again, stating without many words how excited she actually had been for college life. Tammy had insisted on coming home on the weekends, but Taylor pointed out that was when the parties were, and she’d move heaven and hell to get her sister to fully enjoy college life.
“Comin’, Tay,” Tim called as he rushed down the stairs, tumbling into her arms while falling over his own feet. He laughed in delight while his big sister tried breathing through all the horror scenarios she had created while waiting. How would people react to seeing her? She couldn’t imagine and stopped herself from going crazy.
Grabbing the car keys to her dad’s beat-up truck, she headed outside and hopped into the cab. Timmy took a seat next to her, buckling up while humming. It calmed her down more than she was ready to admit.
“School supplies first, and then school uniform, then grocery shopping,” she listed, more for her benefit than his. “And bank. I need money, too,” she added as she thought of how she’d pay for all those items.
“Tammy brought back most of my supplies anyway, so you don’t have to worry about it,” Tim reported, and Taylor smiled to herself. Of course, her sister would’ve thought of that. She still drove the truck toward Sunburn’s general store. “Nope, don’t need anything from here,” Tim repeated, and Taylor shook her head, moving on to the bank.
“I’m the adult in the house, so let me pretend I know what I’m doing.” She grinned, and he cuddled with her on the shared front seat. She parked the truck, ready to hop out, when he hugged her tight.
“I’m glad you’re back. Tammy was getting too strict and too sad. She cried a lot,” he confessed, and she swallowed. Her sister most likely had been overwhelmed with it all.
“Well, we’ll make sure she’s only happy from now on, okay?”
Tim nodded while he stared at the bank. “Can I wait inside the truck?”
She shook her head. “Come on, I’ll be quick,” Taylor promised and then helped her brother out of the cab. Three people had hugged and welcomed her back before she had even entered the bank. While it was clearly nice, a bigger part of her was freaking out. She barely recognized the faces, let alone remembered the names. Rushing into the bank, she was glad once the brass-framed glass door quieted all the noise from the street.
“Tay! Oh, my gosh! I was wonderin’ when you’d be back in Sunburn! After all, the town has been buzzin’ with news of your return. I’m sorry it had to happen the way it did, but boy, am I so glad you’re here, honey!” It had taken all of two seconds before another hug engulfed Taylor, trying to match a voice she almost recognized with a woman that she wasn’t sure she had ever seen.
The face looked strangely familiar, and she thought it was one she had seen in the pictures two weeks ago, only now it was covered with too much makeup and framed by dark waves instead of the soft blonde Taylor had been used to.
“Ash?” she finally asked, realizing that her friend had tears in her eyes.
“I missed you so much, but we all wanted to respect your wishes and leave you alone. You know, you asked us to stay away and not contact you? I always thought you’d be back, but then months turned into years, and I knew I should’ve known you’d be one of those who would actually succeed at leavin’. No one heard from you again, and while your parents were still here and hated you, we’d have preferred you to them.”
Taylor could only shake her head in utter disbelief. “I never knew you were in love with Mason. I saw the pictures in his truck.” Of all the things she could’ve said, she picked that. A stupid topic, really, but she couldn’t help but wonder about the Ashley she had seen in the picture and the Ashley she now saw. In fact, barely anything was left from the best friend she remembered.
“He came by one day, and we talked. Then he came by here again and brought a flower and asked me on a date. I agreed, and we went out. Then we went out a few more times. He was just like you always imagined him to be, ya know? Sweet and fun, romantic and crazy.” Taylor rubbed the spot above her heart, trying to ease the pressure beneath her ribcage. She turned away, watching the street outside, while her friend continued. “You were gone, Tay, and I found out why you had been crushing on him so hard. Sadly, even though things were amazin’ for the time being, it took me until he held our baby girl to realize that while he had everythin’ he wanted, I was the wrong
woman for him. He looked at the girl, and I might as well have left the room. It didn’t matter. I wasn’t the right one.”
Taylor spun back to her former friend, eyes wide. “You have a daughter together?” she choked out, not even noticing that her throat was so dry, she sounded as if she was on the verge of tears.
“I … it’s his daughter. I signed away all rights soon after the birth. I thought a daughter would guarantee us a happy forever. It was the only reason I agreed to have a baby in the first place. Stupid, really, because I have never wanted children. Not once.” Ashley shrugged and then walked back around the counter. Taylor followed, taking out her checkbook absent-mindedly. She remembered her friend saying once that she had not one motherly bone in her body.
“You really loved him.” It came out more as a statement than the question she had intended to ask, but Ashley nodded in confirmation nonetheless.
“In a way, I did. I love the idea of what Mason and I could’ve and should’ve been, but once he held Rebecca, I knew I was dumb. While a daughter clearly is the most special girl in a father’s life, shouldn’t a girlfriend have been able to put a look of utter happiness on her boyfriend’s face, too? Just one moment when he looks at you and you know he’s happy havin’ you?”
Taylor smiled wistfully. She had read about those moments in books; in fact, she could definitely see it in her mind. It was something a couple should achieve in life.
“I knew exactly how it should’ve looked on his face. After all, I had seen it before, only it never was directed at me,” Ash went on.
Not sure what to say, Taylor decided to stay quiet instead.
“Anyway, I’m more than happy that you’re back because no one could be my best friend but you. Hey, will you come to the game tomorrow? First game of the season, baby! You need to come back and be you because, honestly, you look terrible, honey.” Ashley winked at her, and Taylor grinned. She wanted to go; she really did because she used to be one of those women who’d have died for football. Only that wasn’t part of her life any longer. She had seen exactly one game after leaving and that had hurt too much.
“Listen, Ash, I’d love to go, but I won’t take Tim to a game where everyone’s staring at me like I’m the dog with two heads,” she explained ever so quietly, but Tim came over nonetheless.
“People missed you, and Tammy never took me to a game. Max always gets to go,” he whined.
“Max?” Taylor echoed.
“The Rivers’ boy. I mean Kelly and John’s boy,” Ashley explained, and Taylor combed a hand through her hair, wondering if she’d ever catch up.
“Exactly how many people of our group are married?”
“Almost all of them,” Ash dutifully reported, and Taylor whistled.
“Nice. Then again … we’ve never been normal.” She winked and then handed the check over, waiting for her cash.
“Yeah,” Ash replied, counting out the money. “I’m gonna pick ya up at six. Wear somethin’ normal.” She eyed Taylor up and down, making her feel self-conscious.
“Can we leave, Tay?” Timmy asked, grabbing her light sweater. He had been more patient than she had expected.
“We’re going,” she promised, giving Ashley an apologetic smile while accepting the money Ash handed to her.
“Six, Collins,” Ashley reminded her as the two turned away.
“Call me Michigan. It makes me feel better. I barely remember the high-school me,” Taylor admonished over her shoulder.
“You got it, babe,” Ash assured her, blowing her a kiss before waving her off.
“Can we please hurry with the rest?” Timmy asked as they stepped out on the street. “I want to be done soon and … Mason!” The boy jumped excitedly at Mason, strong arms catching him while Taylor’s heart did a flip-flop.
“Hey, buddy! Hey, Michigan!” He winked at her, making her involuntarily smile.
“Look, there’s Max!” Tim, barely back on the ground, ran off, and Taylor groaned. She’d have to talk to Kelly next while she wanted nothing more than to forget about the shopping and return straight home.
“Hey, Mason.” She wanted to say so much more, but she got caught up in his stormy eyes, being thrown right back to senior year, when her crush on him had been the strongest. She noticed differences between now and then, though; his smile was more serious, his eyes less carefree, and his face more man than boy. He had a scar on his upper lip that hadn’t been there before. She found herself almost reaching out, wanting to touch it, when something bumped into her side.
“Tay, can I stay at Max’s until Sunday?” Tim wanted to know, another time pulling on her sweater.
“That’s three nights! I don’t think Max’s mom will be too happy with that,” she protested, the prospect of being alone terrifying her. Too many ghosts haunted those walls.
“Oh, honey! Actually, having Tim around will gimme a break. Hey, Taylor! Mason?” Kelly joined them, another high school friend hugging her without prompting, and Taylor couldn’t get around noticing that her behavior toward Mason was a lot less affectionate.
“I gotta go, Michigan. Keep that pretty head of yours up. Kelly?” He politely tipped the visor of his hat and then vanished inside the bank. Taylor watched Kelly look after the cowboy, thoughtfully shaking her head before focusing back on her.
“As I was saying, it’s not a bother at all. Tamara always brought him over, so he even has clothes at our place to tide him over.” She then smiled.
Taylor felt like cold water had doused her. Tammy surely had tried to get Tim out of the house so she could study for finals, or because their dad and the little boy were too much to handle for a twenty-one-year-old, yet Taylor was fine with having Timmy around.
“You know, Kelly, I’m not Tamara. I can handle my baby brother just fine, so no need to take him off my hands if that’s what you’re thinking. Should you, though, have offered because you know it’ll make them happy, I might be okay with him staying that long. I do have conditions. First, it won’t happen during school weeks anymore, and second, they have a sleepover at our place next.” She forced herself to finish the words with a smile to take the edge off her words as she waited for Kelly’s reaction.
Surprisingly, the other woman teared up, hugging her. “It’s so good to have you back,” Kelly claimed. “I’m gonna take the boys and see you at the game tomorrow. If someone can handle whatever life’s throwing her way, it’s you. Tim’s excited to be at the game with you.”
Taylor glared at her brother, reminding herself that everyone shared everything right away and without hesitation in a small town.
“I’ve been bullied into going.” She grinned. “But I’m excited to go.”
“How about before I drop them off Sunday, I grab lunch, and we hang out and talk? We’ve missed you here,” Kelly emphasized, and Taylor found herself nodding.
“Sounds like a plan. Well, I have to go.” It was true; Taylor was anxious to be back home and out of the town that had eyes on her. She didn’t turn to check who it was this time.
“Bye, Taylor.” Timmy hugged her, making her bend down so he could kiss her cheek.
“Bye, Tay,” Kelly added, and Taylor waved before walking back to her truck. She nodded at a few people who greeted her. Once inside the cab, she started the engine, intent on finishing her errands so she could get back home as soon as possible.
Mason had a hard time not turning back to the window to see if Taylor was still there. Even though he was in a hurry, he wouldn’t mind looking at her for just a few more moments. She looked better already; two weeks of countryside putting color in her cheeks, yet it was more than obvious how tense she’d been. There was no doubt she still felt out of place.
“She’s back.”
Mason blinked in surprise and utter disbelief. Those were the first words Ashley had spoken to him since they had broken up. For a second, he considered playing dumb, when in truth, he was super aware of the fact that Taylor was still outside the bank, but then he decided aga
inst it.
“Good for you. I know you missed her,” he remarked, meaning it. He knew how much Ashley had longed for her best friend, especially in the last year ... even with all the conflicting emotions she had most likely felt.
“I didn’t think we’d ever see that day. Honestly, not ever. And now, she was forced back here and …” Ash shook her head, not looking at him, but stared at a point over his shoulder to where he guessed Taylor was.
“I don’t reckon anyone can force Taylor to do anything.” He was sure of that.
“She’s loyal to a fault, Mason. Always has been and you know that. As long as she thought her siblings were well taken care of, she stayed away. They talked every night, and Tammy and Tim went up there regularly. Now, she knew they needed her, and she returned. I wonder what she thought about the fact her bedroom was no longer,” Ashley mused, and Mason cleared his throat, trying to avoid thinking about how Taylor had felt walking back into her personal hell.
“I think she’s keeping her head held high. Being upset or even cryin’ would’ve given her parents too much power over her,” he commented while getting the cash he had planned on retrieving.
“True. I never thought about it that way,” his ex-girlfriend stated, and he just nodded. “I’m takin’ her to the game tomorrow. She’s a little too city,” she continued.
“She’s still Taylor. She’ll love every minute of the game,” he reassured her, more than just a little irritated by this conversation simply because they were having one.
Silence met his statement, and he looked up, finding Ashley studying him.
“I suppose you’re right,” she finally gave in, and for the first time in a long time, she had a hint of gentleness in her voice.
“I gotta go. Shift,” he mumbled, no longer wanting to talk about Taylor or better yet, talking to Ashley about Taylor since said girl was the reason Ash now was his ex.
“Be careful,” Ashley told him, and it almost sounded like it had back when their lives were entwined.
