I exhaled, not having realised how up shit creek he was. It was true. The crib the DC had destroyed was Milan’s business, his livelihood, while mine was whoring myself out.
“Fine, I’ll come back,” I relented. “But you damn well better make those bastards respect me for this. Cos if they so much as make a joke ’bout me being a prossie, I will—”
“I’ll talk to them, make sure they don’t open their ugly pie-holes.”
“Also, make it known to Craven that me working for Sierra doesn’t mean I’m working for him. I don’t just want a verbal agreement, I want it in writing, cos I won’t ever do anything for that psycho again. It took more than you’ll ever know to get out from under his thumb, so there’s no way in hell I’d willingly go back under there.”
“No problem. I know your deal with him, Tane, Hemi told me all about it when it happened. I made sure before you agreed to go with Sierra that he couldn’t reel you in again.”
“Good,” I said, thinking Hemi was still doing good by me even after his death.
“So, when will you return? Sierra is furious that she had to fob her clients off last night.”
“She can start whoring me out tomorrow, I just want tonight to myself.”
“Hemi’s funeral is tomorrow, I had to move it forward a day.”
I went quiet, not sure if I was ready for that.
“You still there?” he asked.
“Yeah,” I breathed out. “Tell her I’ll do whatever she wants the day after his funeral. If she doesn’t like it, too bad.”
“Okay, I’ll make sure she backs off for the time being.”
“Ta, mate,” I said, pushing Hemi’s gate open.
I hung up and pulled out my keys, letting myself into Hemi’s house. He’d given me a key when he’d bought the place, the my house is your house not needing to be said. I closed the door behind me and looked around the Rakete home. It was stuffy, the windows all shut up as though they were away on holiday.
Wishing they were, I headed up the staircase and into Hemi’s bedroom, making a beeline for his king-sized bed. I kicked off my boots and crawled under the covers. It still smelt of him, his favourite cigarettes permeating the sheets. I could almost imagine him walking through the door with a ciggie in his hand, asking me why the fuck I was in his bed.
I pulled the covers higher and turned on my side, my tears finally falling.
***
I don’t know how I did it, how I got through Hemi’s funeral without cracking. It hurt, fucking hurt so bad that I felt like my heart was being ripped out of my chest, even more so when Painkiller went nuts. He’d tried to stop the coffin from being lowered into the ground, wouldn’t let go of it. It took four men to tear him off it, then it took both me and Rafael holding him to stop him from doing it again. We’d held him from both sides, wrapping him in our arms, only caring about Painkiller, not our differences. He’d sobbed in our embrace, his legs barely holding him up. I ended up half-carrying him to my truck, Rafael climbing in next to him.
I glanced at the two as I kicked the engine to life. Painkiller was still sobbing, allowing Rafael to hold him. Rafael looked up at me, his expression filled with sorrow. In that moment, I forgot to hate him, and was actually grateful he was here.
“Thank you for bein’ here for Pain,” I said.
He hugged Painkiller tighter. “This isn’t Pain, it’s Killer.” He ran a hand over Hemi’s brother’s head. “He’s in too much pain to care it’s me and not you.”
I didn’t reply, just pulled out into the traffic. The wake was even more heart-wrenching, especially when Jasper started screaming from downstairs. A few of the women went down to comfort the poor kid, our doctor too. He quietened down after that, but it didn’t stop the screams from echoing in my head, the torn sounds staying with me long after they’d petered out.
It also affected others at the wake, some openly crying. Sierra’s lounge was overflowing with people from all walks of life. Hemi wasn’t just important to our gang, he was important to so many, all of them wanting to farewell the big man with the even bigger heart. People I didn’t even know came up and patted me on the back. Everyone, whether I knew them or not, seemed to know all about me. Hemi had told them I was his brother, some of them not realising we weren’t blood. But I didn’t correct them, because I honestly felt like Hemi was blood. So, I let them shake my hand, say how sorry they were for my loss. I shook their hands back, heard the pain in their voices as they spoke about Hemi.
Everyone was hurting. Hemi meant the world to them. He hadn’t just been big in person, his personality had been massive. He had helped numerous people in the club, outside of the club too. It all came out that day at the wake. I found out that Hemi had loaned Mikhail a grand to pay off a loan shark, telling him there was no rush to pay him back. He’d also paid the university fees of a couple members’ kids, Fabian’s daughter one of them.
Her lip quivered as she talked about him, the slim blonde looking like a waif in a long black dress. “Hemi was the most beautiful person I’d ever met,” Nancy said. “No one had a bigger heart than him.”
I wished Hemi could’ve heard that. He thought he was ugly, that people looked at him with disgust because he’d been grossly overweight, but to hear this young girl saying he was the most beautiful person ... it broke me. I nodded as she continued to praise him, every word sending daggers into my heart. I had coped after his death, life’s distractions stopping me from fully accepting it.
Something I could no longer do.
I don’t know how I got through the rest of that day. I think I must have gone into autopilot. But the next morning, it all came crashing down on me. I woke up and just stared at the wall across from the bed. At that moment, I wished I’d died instead of Hemi. He’d affected people’s lives in a good way, making things better for them, but me... I’d done nothing but wreak havoc, destroying my family, murdering people because Craven had ordered me to, ostracising my eldest son, missing my youngest. I wished Dante had come back for the funeral. I knew he couldn’t, that he was safer up north, but I needed him more than air right now. Needed him to push me, to tell me to get up, that I couldn’t lie in bed all day. But the only person pushing me, telling me to get up, wasn’t doing it for my benefit, but for hers.
Sierra was hovering over me, barking, “Get up, Tane!”
I ignored her, just wanting to die. She didn’t care that I’d had to attend my best friend’s funeral yesterday, didn’t care that everything inside of me was breaking apart. All she cared about was that I fucked her bitches so she got paid.
“Why won’t you get up?” She shoved me again, I think she even hit me across the head, but I barely felt anything on the outside. My body was numb while my mind was weighed down. I felt so depressed, so fucking depressed. I went to close my eyes.
“Don’t you dare go back to sleep?” she shrieked. “Get up!”
I kept my eyes closed, just wanting to sink into unconsciousness. Wanting to sleep forever.
She let out a frustrated yell and took off out of the room. I drifted into sleep, then was yanked out of it by more yelling. Sierra again.
“Make him wake up!” she demanded.
I opened my eyes to find Milan looking down at me with concern. He bobbed down to my level. “Are you sick, Tane?”
I didn’t reply, just stared back at him.
He looked up at Sierra. “It looks like manic depression. He’s bipolar. Leave him be, he won’t be coming out of it anytime soon.”
“No! I have him booked up. Do you know how much money I’ll lose from this?”
“Give the poor bloke a break. Let him grieve for his best friend.”
“He was fine the other day.”
“Well, he isn’t now.”
“Too bad. The only reason your gang’s here is because he’s going to bring in a shitload of money for me. I’ll lose over ten grand a day with him not working.”
Milan rose up. “You can’t be serious?” he sa
id, sounding shocked.
“I’m dead serious. My clients are extremely wealthy and will pay through their noses to get a taste of him.”
“Why the fuck for? What does he have, a golden dick or something?”
“He’s unique and dangerous. He’s the type of man women fantasise about, but are too scared to go near. The type they imagine breaking into their house, taking them by force. They want a man like the rough, dangerous bodice ripper, but in a safe environment like here. That’s what they’re paying for.”
“I have a shitload of dangerous men here that are more than willing to fuck your clients anyway they want. You don’t need Tane to do that.”
She screwed her face up with disgust. “Have you seen what your men look like? Grease monkeys who would make a woman run not come. Except for that mouth-watering gay guy, none of them are even half as attractive as Tane, not to mention he can scare the bejesus out of women, making them come in their knickers with one stare. He’s also the best fuck I’ve ever had. Most men only care about getting off, but Tane, he seems to relish getting a woman off. And that’s why every single woman I’ve spoken to are eager to part with their money. I have four lined up for today. If I could I’d have more, but I know I can’t push him that hard. But this...” She waved her hand at me. “He can’t be out for days. Isn’t there a drug you can give him to make him snap out of this?”
“He doesn’t take medication.”
I closed my eyes, not wanting medication. I wanted oblivion.
“But you said he’s bipolar,” Sierra replied. “He should be on something, so get whatever it is and give it to him.”
“I would need to get a doctor, but I still don’t think—”
“You’re not here to think, you’re here to get Tane right so he can do his job. I can’t sustain your crew without the cash he produces. The only reason I’m even having you lot stay is because of him.”
“Christ, lady, he’s a person, not a sex toy. You can’t just make him have sex.”
“If you don’t want me to kick your gang out, you better bloody make him.” She let out a shriek of fright.
I opened my eyes, seeing Milan pinning her to the wall across from me. “You think you can fucking talk to me like that!” he yelled at her.
“I can talk to you however I please and you will do as you’re told!” she yelled back. “My uncle will annihilate you if he knew you touched me, so let go!”
“You’ve got a nerve threatening me!” he roared, his face going beet red. “I’m the only reason my men haven’t stripped your house bare, haven’t stripped you bare. Do you realise there are men in this house who would fucking kill you if I told them to. Threaten me again and you’re going to end up dead!”
She sucked in a breath, her expression telling me she knew she’d bitten off more than she could chew. “But my uncle—”
“Won’t do a goddamn thing to me, because I’ll frame Reaper from the Devil’s Crew with your murder. Don’t even think for one second I’m your puppet, Sierra. Don’t take my compliance for weakness, nor my crew’s. If anything, some of us are fucking evil, me included. You knew that when you let us walk through your door. Don’t think your uncle could’ve stopped any of my crew from raping and stealing from you. I’m the one who keeps them in line. Some of those men have been to jail for atrocious crimes, and for you to even think you have us on a leash because of your uncle is so fucking stupid it’s laughable.”
“I’m sorry,” she choked out. “I didn’t—”
“Think,” he ended her sentence. “So, you’ll leave Tane the fuck alone until he’s capable of functioning again.”
“But—”
“There are no fucking buts! Or I will walk out that front door and you’ll see just how untamed and wild my men are. Got that?!”
Sierra jolted. She started nodding her head fast, fear twisting her pretty features.
“Now, I will do my best for Tane,” Milan continued. “I will find a doctor—”
“You have one, the guy who’s watching over that kid downstairs.”
“Jason’s not a licensed doctor anymore, did some shady things and went to jail for it, so I’ll get a legit doctor in. I made the mistake of not doing that the other day when Tane asked for some meds, if anything, I probably should’ve okayed Fabian getting them instead, but I thought Tane was just trying to get rec drugs off him.” He exhaled loudly. “Just let him rest until I can get a doctor.”
“I know one that’ll help. She works in a private hospital. She can get Tane whatever medication he needs.”
“Good,” he said, letting go of her. “Bring her in. She can talk to Fabian about Tane’s condition. I’ll let him know she’s coming.”
Sierra nodded. “I’ll do that. Penny is a great doctor, she’s helped me a lot in the past.”
“Well, I hope she can help Tane, too.”
I closed my eyes again, knowing no doctor could help me.
***
I felt a sharp sting, the pain waking me up. I opened my eyes, seeing a middle-aged woman remove a syringe from my rear. She smiled and ran a hand over my arse, staring at me with lust in her eyes. I looked down at my curled-up body. I was naked, and had no clue how I got that way. The woman murmured something to Sierra, her hand not leaving me. Sierra smiled back, her blue eyes sparkling.
“Feeling better, Tane?” she asked, brushing my cheek almost lovingly. Although the only thing she loved was money.
I went to reply, but stopped as bliss shot through me. I unfurled and leaned my head back, letting out a groan so deep it vibrated through me. The women started murmuring excitedly, sounding happy, but not as happy as I was. I hadn’t experienced something this pure since the first time I’d shot up with meth. I let out another groan, this one deeper.
The middle-aged woman giggled like a schoolgirl. “He’s hard as a rock,” she said, grabbing onto my cock.
I bucked my hips off the mattress, pumping into her hand, feeling an unusually intense need to come. It was almost painful.
“Looks like he’s ready to go,” Sierra said. “How long will this state last for?”
“Several hours. He’ll soften once it wears off.”
“Then, I’ll need you back tomorrow. Word’s getting around about him. My timeslots are filling up faster than I can book, which means he needs to be functional every day.”
“I can make that happen, as long as you let me have a bit of fun with him for free.”
“Deal.”
“Mmm, can I have a taste before his first client arrives?”
“You have about forty minutes, so go for it. Just clean him up once you’ve finished.”
“Oh, I plan on cleaning him up with my tongue.”
Sierra laughed. “Well, I’ll leave you to it, then.”
Footsteps receded, then hands were back on me, lips too. Kissing me. I opened my mouth, letting her tongue inside, getting lost in it. In time, too. Her hands moved over me. Then my cock was being pushed into warm, loose pussy, but it felt so good I didn’t care. I looked up at the woman riding me. She was completely naked. Murmurs of yes, God, and my name left her lips as she picked up pace. I could feel my balls pulling up tight, ecstasy shooting through my cock. I closed my eyes, groaning loudly as I came.
I opened my eyes at what felt like a heartbeat later, confused when I found another woman on top of me. Time started tripping on me. Jumping from one woman to the next. One second I was fucking a redhead with a tight pussy, the next I was ramming my cock up a dyed blonde’s fat arse, not knowing how she’d gotten under me. Not caring either. Because the bliss had taken over. I took my pleasure from her, while she screamed my name, taking pleasure from me. Then another time jump and another woman. Enormous tits were thrust into my face. I licked and suckled, gorging myself on them, barely coming up for air. Then I felt a second sting, followed by two bodies wrapped around mine, their lips and hands all over me. I didn’t want it to stop.
And it didn’t.
A
seemingly never-ending supply of women kept coming my way. I lost track of how many there were, lost track of the days too. Milan and Fabian came to see me. They looked concerned, asked me questions about whether I was taking drugs, but I waved them off, lying through my teeth so they didn’t stop that sting. Then one day the sting didn’t go all the way in, the needle being ripped out of me too soon. Shouting started up. I opened my eyes, watching what was playing out before me. The woman who’d brought me the sting was on the floor, trembling and crying, scared out of her mind. While Sierra was cowering in the far corner of the room as Killer screamed at her, looking the craziest I’d ever seen him. He was throwing out a slew of foul language at her, his face red with anger. The woman who’d brought me the sting scrambled to her feet and went for the door.
Killer spun around, hollering, “And don’t come back!”
“She has to!” Sierra yelled. “I need her.”
Killer turned back to Sierra, who shrieked and held up her hands, covering her head. “If I see you or that quack near Tane again, I will fuckin’ kill you!”
“But Milan said—”
“To give Tane bipolar meds, but what do I find your bitch friend giving him?” He held up a syringe. “This ain’t fuckin’ medication. Meds don’t bloody do that to a man,” he yelled, pointing at me. “They don’t make his cock hard, or make him writhe on a bed like that. What is it? Speed? Ecstasy? Oh, please don’t tell me it’s meth.”
Jagged Pill (Broken Lives Book 3) Page 17
