by Jim Benton
couldn’t take his eyes off Isabella. Who could blame
him? She’s a wonderful human being and is probably
the only one in the school that could keep her finger
in his mouth for a full minute.
And Hudson and I had a lot of fun, too, even
though I kept feeling dumb that I had thought
superpowers were real.
They’re not.
Or are they? I mean, how does Angeline just
make people feel comfortable around her? And why
does everybody like Emmily, no matter how goofy
she is? She uncooled Chip and cured Mrs. Maple.
Maybe I don’t always know what boys
are feeling, but lots of times I know what they’re
feeling. And ants. And aunts, too.
I mean, I did knock down two bottles, once I
understood what my way was. And in a time of
dire emergency, I heroically touched antenna-like
finger toes. I am good at observing things, and I
guess I can naturally speak the male language.
Okay, so maybe I do have
superpowers.
Maybe we all do.
We just have to find them.
Thanks for listening, Dumb Diary,
P.S. Oh, one more thing — Isabella’s
superpower. Remember how Isabella has a soft spot
for Emmily? And since it turns out that Chip is not
better at those games than I am, Isabella gave
Emmily the koala bear she won at the bottle toss.
And the unicorn she won at the ring toss.
And the alligator she won at the basket throw.
Isabella gave emmily all twelve of the
prizes she won.
You probably think that Isabella’s superpower
is winning games, but it’s not.
Isabella just walked up to each game and
introduced herself as Jamie Kelly.
That may sound like her superpower is her
cleverness, and that’s part of it, but when you think
about it, Isabella’s real superpower is that she’s
friends with me.
What’s YOUR Superpower?
Check off all that apply!
Glitterizing
Observing
Winning games
Listening
Flying
Making people laugh
Not getting grossed
out by super-gross
things
Invisibility
Extreme coolness
Understanding
others
Leaping tall
buildings
Excessive cuteness
Inner beauty
Genius brain
Superspeed
Homework-finishing
Being awesome is only half the battle.
Dear Dumb Diary,
A long time ago, I wrote a letter to the president about the
space program and how it would be a good idea for ME to
select the people who should be shot into space.
I made a lot of very good points about who should
be selected, such as weight, ease of stuffi ng into a bag and
tossing into a rocket, unnatural blondness of hair, and how
much happier our Earth would be as a result. I was much
younger when I wrote it, and I understand that my ideas
would not have been seriously considered.
But that was six months ago, and now I think I am
qualified to choose.
About Jim Benton
Jim Benton is not a middle-school girl, but do
not hold that against him. He has managed to
make a living out of being funny, anyway.
He is the creator of many licensed properties,
some for big kids, some for little kids, and some
for grown-ups who, frankly, are probably behaving
like little kids.
You may already know his properties: It’s
Happy Bunny™ or Catwad™, and of course you
already know about Dear Dumb Diary.
He’s created a kids’ TV series, designed
clothing, and written books.
Jim Benton lives in Michigan with his spectac-
ular wife and kids. They do not have a dog, and
they especially do not have a vengeful beagle.
This is his first series for Scholastic.
Jamie Kelly has no idea that Jim Benton, or
you, or anybody is reading her diaries. So, please,
please, please don’t tell her.
