As she moved away from the bar, she caught my eye. For once, she didn’t look away. She walked towards me but Sally intervened, wanting to talk to me about the bands.
“Ask me about it when I come in tomorrow,” I said, trying to brush her aside.
She didn’t move though. “We need to settle this now,” she said. “The opening band says we paid them wrong. They are getting all antsy about it. And they say the other bands drank their rider.”
She gripped hold of my arm, clutching me tight.
“And that’s what I pay you to do. If you can’t figure it out, I’ll get someone else to do the job.” I unwrapped her fingers and ignored the pained look on her face. I had no time for her complaints.
By the time I got rid of her, Dee had gone. I figured she was backstage, so I followed her there. Halfway though, I hesitated. It was better to let her come to me. As much as I wanted to deny it, this thing between us was tangible. It smouldered beneath the surface of everything we did.
It’d be a helluva challenge to get her to change her mind about me but she was worth the effort. I’d have to work slowly and carefully though or she’d kill me.
When I got backstage, Holden and Carlie were chatting to Dee. That worried me. What would she say to them if they asked about me? She wasn’t the type to badmouth someone behind their back but she also wasn’t the type to hold back.
Pete and Ferdie sprawled on the couches, making themselves comfortable. I walked over to join in the conversation. There was no awkward silence, no indication that they’d been talking about me.
Dee leaned against the edge of the table and, when she saw me, she shuffled a little as though to make room for me to sit. I stood apart, though. I didn’t want to force things. For once in my life, I was unsure of myself.
When Carlie and Holden went to the bar, she turned to me.
“I’ve been working on the song,” she said.
I raised my eyebrows. “That’s good.”
“Maybe.” She shrugged. “It’s a bit crap.”
“They always are. Start with crap and turn it into something. Once you have the basics down, you have something to work with.”
She smiled. “Thanks for the other day. I’m not sure…”
She didn’t finish that sentence. I really wanted to know what she wasn’t sure about. Me? The song? Life itself? But she’d work that out for herself. The tension cracked and sizzled between us. We weren’t touching but I could feel the pressure of her hands as they pressed against the table edge. I could sense the tickle of hair hanging in her face. My lungs filled each time she inhaled.
“When are you playing again?” she asked.
“Saturday night, actually.” I didn’t tell her, of course, but Saturday night was the night the record company guy was coming to check us out. I didn’t want to think about it too deeply. I had been considering releasing stuff independently until I’d received that call. It was an option. I’d even contacted a few publicists. I didn’t need a big company backing me, but it did seem a much safer option. A stamp of approval.
“I might pop along,” she said. “I never really got to listen too much last time.”
I grinned. She sure hadn’t.
The distance between us didn’t seem so insurmountable when she smiled at me like that. I wondered what it’d be like dating a girl like Dee. Even though she wasn’t a kid anymore, how much of that tough front was real. Without Jake around, had she run wild? I couldn’t imagine it. Underneath it all, she was still pretty innocent.
A lock of her hair floated down over her face and I longed to reach over and tuck it behind her ear, but I knew that wasn’t a thing I could do. This peace between us was fragile.
Pete called Dee over to him and she reluctantly moved off. The swing of her hips as she walked was truly a great thing. Before I got a chance to speak to her again, Carlie came in, full of fire.
“Sally’s in the toilets downstairs, crying. What the hell did you do to her?”
Everyone in the small room stared at me.
“Nothing. She’s just being over-sensitive.”
“Well, you should go down and talk to her. She’s really upset. She said you are going to sack her.”
I rolled my eyes. “Okay, I’ll sort this out.”
I’d have happily left Sally crying in the toilet if that suspicion hadn’t come back into Dee’s eyes, but I didn’t want to look like a heartless bastard in front of her. Sally would get over this far better without me interfering. Carlie should know that. If I acted kindly toward her, she’d just get ideas.
Still, I went downstairs and knocked on the toilet door.
No answer, just a sniffle.
“Sally, come out. We need to talk.”
“I don’t want to talk to you.”
My first instinct was to leave it at that. I didn’t particularly want to talk to her either. But then, if I went back upstairs and Dee asked me about it, I couldn’t tell her I’d left things unresolved.
“I’m going to get a Jack and Coke and take it into your office for you. If you decide to come out, I’ll be there.”
I grabbed the drink from the bar and took it into Sally’s office. When Violet had worked here, that office had been a death trap, with stuff piled up everywhere. Sally had it as neat as a pin though. Maybe I’d been a bit harsh on her. She did her job well; it was just that she wanted my intervention far too much. I knew full well the kind of “intervention” she really wanted.
Sally came in a moment later. She’d tried to clean up her face but her eyes were swollen and red and she’d not managed to remove the traces of mascara that had run down her face.
“You wanted to talk?” she said. She picked up the drink and stirred it with the straw.
“Sit down,” I said.
She sat at the desk and I sat on the couch. I put my foot up on my knee, trying to keep this casual.
“Look, I probably shouldn’t have snapped at you earlier…”
She tried to smile at me.
“But, I need you to be much more autonomous in this job. If there’s an issue, sort it out yourself. I won’t always be here and, even if I am, I have other things to deal with.”
She nodded.
I bit the inside of my mouth for a moment before continuing.
“Sally, you have to understand, our relationship is professional. That’s all it’ll ever be.”
She sobbed again but nodded, without raising her head. It was better to spell it out now than to let things continue. I waited for her to speak. She didn’t look at me though.
“You can go,” she said.
I got up, relieved to have things out in the open.
I wanted to go upstairs, to see Dee again but, when I got there, they’d all gone to a house party. They hadn’t even told me they were leaving.
Dee
“Is he as good as he thinks he is?” Ferdie asked. We were waiting for Alex to come on stage.
I had to admit that he was. For all Alex’s ego, he had the talent to back it up. I was surprised that he hadn’t gone further with his band. Other than playing at Trouble, he didn’t seem to do much.
Jake had always said Alex was the driving force in their band, the one who wanted the rock glory. He’d sent out demos from the time they first started and he pestered people until they got publicity and attention. It seemed though that Alex hadn’t progressed much beyond that. But what did I know? He might have all kinds of deals going on behind the scenes.
Ever since we’d played, I’d been buzzing. Everything with the band seemed charmed. The music kept getting better, my song was almost ready to be played. The day after the gig, I’d been walking down the street and some girls had recognised me from the band. That had been weird. Hell, if that kind of thing kept up, I’d have an ego as big as Alex’s.
The band room was jam-packed when we got there. We pushed our way to the bar and got drinks. Pete was too busy working to even say hello.
“Near the sound desk, th
at’s the best spot,” said Ferdie.
Since I was happy to stay low key, I followed him. I nodded to Hamish, the sound engineer. He’d seemed like a really nice guy when we’d been sound checking. Then I settled back and waited. The band on stage were just finishing. They were a bunch of five chicks. I wondered if I should introduce myself to them. I knew pretty much no female musos and we had to stick together in this world.
Last time I’d watched Alex play, there hadn’t been the same buzz of tension in the air. Maybe I’d been too focused on my own shit to notice it or maybe it’d been a more casual night. Now, I couldn’t help but get into the mood of it.
Carlie and Holden saw us and pushed through the crowd.
“Hey, how’s it going?” she asked. “God, I hate myself for loving this guy so much.”
I glanced at Holden, wondering how he’d take that.
“Not Holden, I mean Alex. When he gets on stage, you forget what a bag of dicks he is and how hard he is to work for and all that ‘stop giving people free drinks’ lecturing. He’s just hot sex on legs when he’s up there. It’s those damn leather pants, I swear to God. Makes you just want to lick him to see what he tastes like.”
Again, I glanced at Holden. Surely he’d be angry, but he just laughed.
“He’s nothing. Wait until you see me in my full glory, babes. You’ll be dripping wet at my feet.”
“Already am, babes.”
Ew. That was too much about their relationship for me to know. Still, Carlie was a funny chick. We’d gone out drinking the other night and she’d told me some hilarious stories about Alex. They had such a love/hate relationship. It was hard when she asked me about him though. I didn’t want to say too much. I’d once thought about blackening his name by letting the world know what he’d done but, when it came to the crunch, I couldn’t profit from my pain like that.
Ferdie ran to the bar for another round of drinks before the band started. He’d just got back in time. The lights darkened. Everything went quiet, then Alex appeared.
As he went into the first song, I began to understand what Carlie meant about those leather pants. Even when he wore them usually, it didn’t have the same effect but up there, in the lights and with all the hip-thrusting guitar moves, oh boy, was I in trouble. Well, literally in Trouble but figuratively too.
I clenched my legs together. My panties would NOT be getting wet over him. Not now. Not ever. I wasn’t sixteen-years-old anymore. He couldn’t do that to me.
Sweet Jesus, though. My teenage fantasies came flooding back, every dirty thought of the things I wanted Alex to do to my body. Surges of heat rushed through me as I watched his fingers move on the frets. Alex became someone else on that stage. His body moved with an aggressive grace. Charged like an electrical storm.
I couldn’t reconcile this man on stage, god-like and divine, with the man I knew. All the self-assuredness and all the swagger amped up into something extraordinary.
“Oh, you’ve been converted,” Carlie yelled in my ear.
I shook my head. Never. I could appreciate his performance without losing myself in it.
Only, Carlie pushed me forward with her. Edging closer to the stage, as though venturing into the eye of the storm. Closer and closer. Music engulfed me, sweaty bodies grinding and thumping. My heart beat wildly. I wanted this. I wanted to play like this, having the power to control people and build something that swarmed and flew.
Alex’s gaze searched the crowd, connecting with people. When he glanced at me, the shock almost fell me. If it wasn’t for the tight crush of people, I’d have fallen to the ground. My legs weakened and my heart exploded. Every cell in my body tingled. Inside me, I pounded to the beat, becoming one with him.
The intensity scared me stupid, I was overcome with sensation, as though drugged.
The rest of the gig went by in a blur. My body jerked and thrust, as though nothing separated us. I needed him. It might be crazy and wrong but I knew it then. Just once in this lifetime, I had to have him on top of me, grinding his hips against me, his cock buried deep.
My brain froze. Every doubt, every bit of common sense told me this was wrong. My anger vanished without a trace. I had only one objective in mind and even though I knew I shouldn’t, I couldn’t help myself.
Alex
Well, that had sucked. It’d truly sucked. Even though I’d thrown myself into the show to the best of my ability, something didn’t gel. The timing was off. Fabian missed his beats. He’d been a fucking disaster. I needed to get rid of them, both of them. Maybe it was nothing, the crowd hadn’t even noticed, but I noticed it, and it put me off. And I’d bet good money that the bigwigs noticed it too. I had no hope of impressing them now.
You couldn’t wipe those things away by saying you were having a bad day or blaming the rest of the band.
I stormed into the back room, wishing I could slam the door behind me and keep the world out. I didn’t want their sympathy or commiserations. I didn’t want any clueless nobody telling me I’d rocked out there. I’d not rocked. I’d done the opposite of rocking. Now I just wanted to wrap myself in my misery.
I grabbed my guitar and headed down the back stairs to Sally’s office. I’d lock it in there and then get out. It’d be easier to cope with this on my own. I needed fresh air and loneliness. Maybe the better part of a bottle of whiskey? I’d do that and forget the whole disaster.
I locked my gear away in the office cupboard and grabbed a towel to wipe the sweat off my face. I made doubly sure everything was secure.
Dee stood in the doorway, like a burst of fresh air. Her eyes had lost their contempt, they’d lost everything but lust and longing.
“What’s up?” she asked, her voice husky.
“I’ve got to get out of here, it’s not a good time.”
She stepped from the darkness into the light of the office. I leaned against the desk, willing her to come closer. Her hips swayed as she walked into the room. Her nipples strained against the fabric of her t-shirt. She was heaven wrapped in a tasty package, and longing for her throbbed through my body.
She locked the door, then didn’t stop until she was in front of me, her face turned toward me, her body pressing against mine. The scent of her muddled my scenes. I’m not sure if she kissed me or I kissed her but our lips crushed together in a rush of heat. Her kiss hit me harder than anything in this world had ever done before. Sweet and bitter and harsh, all mixed into one. It went beyond the physical and ripped into my soul.
Her fingers tangled in my hair, pulling me closer, until I was sure her lips would be imprinted on mine forever. She broke the kiss, moaning softly, but her body didn’t leave mine.
I picked her up and sat her on the desk, kissing her again and again.
My kisses ran from her mouth, down her neck as she moaned softly, the vibrations of her breath tickling my ears. She shrugged off her jacket as her legs wrapped around me. As I kissed her, I moved my hands under her, raising her to me. I wanted to explore every inch of her body, possessing her completely.
She laughed, softly, as though the pleasure in her bubbled over.
I slowly raised her t-shirt over her head, revealing the nakedness underneath. Those nipples, so hard and tempting, I wanted them in my mouth. Fighting my own urges, I tried to tease her gently but the lust in me took over.
Her back arched toward me as I took her nipple between my teeth, her moans increasingly louder. With each sob of delight, I sucked harder. The way she lost control was a glorious thing. There was no hesitation, no thought at all, just an overwhelming need for the pleasure I gave her.
My hand moved under her skirt. Her thighs were sticky with desire. I needed to get her panties off. No barrier should ever stand between me and that sweetness.
As though reading my mind, she wiggled free of them. I moved back, spreading her legs and taking in the sight she offered me. I ran my fingers along her lips, spreading the wetness over the smooth, bare flesh, while my cock almost burst through the le
ather of my pants.
When I squirmed my fingers inside her, she pulled my hair, gasping aloud. Her gaze never left mine. It goaded me on. I rubbed my thumb against her clit making her buck so hard, she almost jolted off the desk. The fire between us burnt out of control, all barriers broken away.
“Oh, fuck yeah,” she moaned, her mouth against my ear.
I pressed harder against her, pumping my fingers into her. She clenched me inside, so tight, so very tight. If she hadn’t been so wet, I’d have never been able to move inside her. She bucked hard, drawing me in, her fingers twisting tighter in my hair. There was not a particle of control left in her. She was on the edge of coming, about to fall, when I removed my fingers.
“NO!” she screamed.
Her face twisted with need.
Fuck, I wanted to take her, pump my cock inside her. The need almost overwhelmed me but I had to control myself. This had to be about her, not me. I pushed her back and caressed her knees as I lowered my face between her thighs, breathing in the musk of her sex, so wet and swollen.
Then I softly lapped her with my tongue. Moving from her thighs to her centre.
“Please, please,” she sobbed.
I ignored her clit as I toyed with her lips, sucking and licking her into a frenzy. She’d be mine, she’d be mine forever after this. My tongue probed inside her, as she raised her hips to me.
Dee become one hot mess, pleading with me to fuck her. I liked her like that. I liked her sliding around on the desk, out of control and so responsive to my touch.
Unable to tease any longer, I moved my mouth to her clit, gently sucking on that swollen nub. The sensation shot through her like an electric shock, jolting her off the desk as she screamed with pleasure.
Her body squirmed and she almost yanked handfuls of hair from my head. The hair-pulling just made me work her more.
As I drew her into my mouth, she went rigid. She screamed out, no words, just immense pleasure. The orgasm hit and I wrapped my arms around her waist to centre her, working my tongue so she rode the aftershocks. When she finally relaxed, I kissed her stomach in tiny nibbles wanting to get every groan out of her body. Those little noises were the greatest music I’d ever made.
Rock Revenge: Alex's Story (Access All Areas Book 4) Page 8
