I was finally able to calm down and get through the show that night with the help of Jeff Cowan, our wonderful engineer. He reminded me that we could fix any vocal problems in his studio, which we did. He was so good and managed to save the record with only minimal problems. The album was released to great reviews and great sales—plus a wonderful cover story in Bluegrass Unlimited. To be featured on the cover of that magazine was like getting a big stamp of approval from our peers in the genre we loved so much. My angry outburst was a moment of weakness, but the result, Chris Hillman and Herb Pedersen at Edwards Barn, turned out to be yet another highlight of making music with my good friend.
I’ve been honest about the fact that some of my struggles with anger were rooted in my father’s death when I was still a young man. An unexpected breakthrough happened, however, during an interview in 2010 with Scott Ross. Scott was a New York-based DJ who married Nedra Talley, a member of The Ronettes. They became born-again Christians in the 1970s, and Scott was instrumental in Bob Dylan’s spiritual awakening in that period. Roger and Camilla McGuinn were close with Scott and Nedra, so when a friend of mine in Texas asked if I would be willing to have Scott interview me for a televised segment on The 700 Club television program, I agreed. Scott was a terrific interviewer, and he brought out some of the emotions about my father that I had previously kept very private. It was such a moving moment for me, Connie, Scott, Nedra, and everyone else who was there, as Scott and I spoke at my dining room table. I had already forgiven my father for committing suicide, but being able to talk about that forgiveness in a public way was like opening the shutters and letting the sunlight in. Those last remnants of anger were swept out into the light as I let out years of pent-up emotions in a way that others could see. Everyone in the room was crying and could feel the pain I’d locked away for all those years. It was a moment when I truly felt the presence and power of Jesus once again as He continued to work in my life. Now the world would know what happened with my dad, but sharing my struggles in an open and honest way made me feel like a free man.
Soon after, Connie and I had the opportunity to visit the Holy Land with our good friends Father Jon Magoulias and Father Peter Salmas, along with their wives Georgia and Nikki. I had met Father Jon some years earlier when he was visiting our parish, St. Barbara’s, in Santa Barbara, California. I was helping in the church when I heard a loud voice across the room say, “You kept me sane in the seminary.” I looked up to see a very large man with long hair and a very long beard who looked like the leader of a biker gang. I was taken aback. He came over and gave me one of the warmest hugs I’d ever received. “I’m Father Jon,” he said, “and if it wasn’t for The Byrds, I might never have made it through seminary.” I learned that Father Jon had started out as a bassist in a rock band in the Midwest before becoming a priest. From that day on, we became close friends.
During the first leg of our trip we stayed in Jerusalem, which served as our home base. We had so many unforgettable experiences, including boarding a boat on the Sea of Galilee, where many miracles had taken place. To walk where Jesus and His apostles walked was eye-opening. On the day of our wedding anniversary, Connie and I visited Cana, the site of Jesus’s first miracle—turning water into wine at a wedding feast. In the Church at Cana, Father Jon and Father Peter read the account from the scriptures and announced that we were celebrating our special day together. There were many highlights on that trip to Israel, but to have such reverence surrounding us in that holy place was beyond beautiful.
We also had the opportunity to visit Egypt and Saint Catherine’s Monastery at the foot of Mount Sinai. We had the option to attend liturgy at the monastery or to hike up to the top of Mount Sinai. Connie went to the liturgy, while I opted for the hike, leaving our hotel at 1:30 a.m. with my fellow travelers. Halfway up the mountain, I ended up hiring one of the Bedouin tribesmen whose camel I rode for the rest of the journey. I will never forget how dark the night was and how bright the stars were. I could hear the bells on the other camels coming up the mountain, and I was struck by the realization that the scene was likely very similar during the time that Moses was on this very mountain. Yes, God is at work in our lives. To be in that part of the world with my precious Connie and my close friends, knowing that I’d accomplished all I’d ever dreamed with my music and had been blessed with two amazing children, I felt peace. I’d overcome challenges, unforgiveness, anger, disease, and so much more. Once again, I felt like I was home.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
BIDIN’ MY TIME
In 2013 Nicky was living in Australia, attending classes at the University of Adelaide to qualify for his graduate degree in viticulture. Meanwhile, Catherine, after earning two master’s degrees, had begun her career in education. Connie and I couldn’t have been prouder of our two children and all they had achieved so far in their young lives. With all that Connie and I had accomplished in our respective careers, there was no comparison to raising a healthy, happy, and loving family. That truth was never more in focus than when Catherine and her husband Nick welcomed their first child, our granddaughter, in late 2016. To see my son-in-law holding this tiny child in his arms right after my daughter had given birth was one of the most beautiful sights we had ever witnessed. Another reminder of what’s important.
Of course, even when you have your priorities in order, it is still nice to be recognized for your music. On October 12, 2013, I received an award from the Far-West Folk Alliance, which was a real honor for me, having started in folk music in 1963 and now having come full circle. Knowing that Roger McGuinn had received the accolade a few years before made it even more special. I was overwhelmed and surprised at all the wonderful letters that were written to me from old friends like Roger, David, Emmylou, John McEuen, Scott Goldman of the Grammy Foundation, and so many other dear friends. I was so grateful that Russ and Julie Paris nominated me, and it was fun to share the night’s award with such a character as Ed Pearl, the former owner of the famed Ash Grove, where it all began.
One of the letters I received that was read aloud at the Folk Alliance event was from Tom Petty. Tom had always been a vocal champion of The Byrds, but I admired his music as much as he admired mine. That’s why I didn’t mind one bit when Herb Pedersen took some time off from our performing schedule as a duo to go on tour with Tom. In the spring of 2016, Herb had been hired to play banjo and sing background vocals on Tom’s newest record with his original band, Mudcrutch. Tom loved Herb’s singing in the studio so much that he offered him a job on the road. I encouraged Herb to accept the offer. While home from the tour for a brief time off, Herb was out with his friend Pete DeCoste. Pete casually said, “You and Tom should produce an album on Chris.” Upon rejoining the tour, Herb brought it up to Tom, who loved the idea and wanted to explore it further.
After the Mudcrutch tour ended, Herb called me up and told me about the concept, but I was a bit skeptical. “At least give Tom a call and talk it over,” Herb urged me. I knew Tom briefly from way back in 1978 when the Heartbreakers were just starting to break big around the world, but I hadn’t spoken with him since he sat in with us at the Byrds reunion show in Ventura, California, in January of 1989. Since it seemed important to Herb, I called Tom the next day. We talked for about twenty-five minutes, which mostly consisted of me saying, “Are you sure you want to do this?” Tom would answer, “Well, do you want me to?” We kept going back and forth like that, which was pretty funny. Finally, I said, “I would love to work with you in the studio!”
It was settled. We would start recording in January 2017 at Tom’s two studios, The Clubhouse and Shoreline Recorders. I hadn’t made a studio album in over twelve years, and I honestly hadn’t really given much thought to making another record. Working with Tom, however, was just the stimulus for creativity that I needed. Originally, I thought about making an acoustic album, but that gradually changed as we started to incorporate electric guitars, drums, and keyboards. Bill Bryson was unable to record with us due to major he
alth issues he was dealing with. Sadly, my dear friend passed away a few months later after a long period of hospitalization due to emphysema and lung damage. It was the first of my records in over twenty-five years that he wasn’t a part of. It was impossible to replace Bill, but we had to figure out someone who was equally talented in their own way. We called Mark Fain in from Nashville—a skilled acoustic and electric bass player who had been with Ricky Skaggs’s band Kentucky Thunder for almost seventeen years. We recorded everything around Herb on acoustic rhythm guitar, Mark on upright and electric bass, and John Jorgenson on electric and acoustic guitar. I mostly sang live with the tracks while we were recording, which I loved. Herb ran the studio band, while Tom was in the booth guiding us—especially me. Tom’s great personal engineer, Ryan Ulyate, ran the board and mixed the album.
In addition to our core group, we had a number of guests join us to make the record really special. My two old bandmates, David Crosby and Roger McGuinn, were kind enough to contribute to the album. David came to the studio and sang on “The Bells of Rhymney,” one of my favorite songs from The Byrds’ first album. Roger overdubbed twelve-string guitar on “Here She Comes Again,” the song we’d written together in 1979. I actually played bass on the song—the first time I’d played bass in the studio in a very long time. Tom brought in the Heartbreakers to play on the track. I loved playing bass alongside drummer Steve Ferrone, as well as keyboardist Benmont Tench. Tom played electric guitar on “Here She Comes Again” and harmonica on “Given All I Can See.” Such a great band! Mike Campbell played a great solo on “Restless,” another song I wrote with Steve Hill.
One day, while setting up in the studio to record, Herb and I started singing the old Everly Brothers song “Walk Right Back.” We were just goofing around, but Tom, who was in the booth listening to us sing, ran out and said, “That sounds so good! We have to record it right now!” And that’s exactly what we did. We recorded the track, sang it, and John Jorgenson played an incredible solo on acoustic guitar. It was magical, once again highlighting Tom’s genius as a musician and producer. Another Hillman-Hill song we dusted off and recorded was “Different Rivers,” a song we wrote back in the late ’80s when my kids were very young. It told the story of Catherine and Nicky and how each of them had such a distinct personality. I’d stashed it away, just waiting for the right time to record it. After adding a reference to Nicky’s future wife, Annie, I knew the time was right.
Everything ran so smoothly with the recording process that, before we knew it, we were almost finished. It only took about five or six weeks in all. We brought in Jay Dee Maness to overdub some steel guitar and Gabe Witcher to play some fiddle parts before finishing all the other overdubs and harmony vocal parts at Tom’s home studio. Tom was an incredible producer, loving all kinds of music and having the wisdom to know where to go with my songs. It was one of the most enjoyable times I’ve ever had making an album, and I was very happy with the finished product.
While we were making the record, Herb and I were invited by Tom’s manager, Tony Dimitriades, to perform at MusiCares, the annual event put on by the Grammy Foundation. Tom was the honoree that year and got to pick who he wanted on the show to perform his songs. Everyone from George Straight to Don Henley was scheduled for the show. Herb and I decided to perform “Wildflowers,” one of Tom’s songs that I had recorded on the new album. We had Benmont Tench from The Heartbreakers on piano and Gabe Witcher from The Punch Brothers sit in with us on fiddle. It was a special night honoring Tom Petty and all the charitable work he had done over his career.
After having done such a great job on the album, I wanted to let Tom know how much I appreciated all he’d done for me. I wanted to give him a gift that would serve as a small expression of my gratitude. I knew just the thing, but getting my hands on it proved to be challenging. Back when The Byrds began, I was playing a Fender Precision bass, but on one of our early trips to New Your City, I managed to locate the Guild factory in New Jersey. On a day off, I took a cab over to the factory, where I tried out a Starfire bass. I loved the hollow body and the double cut-away body style, so after some careful wrangling, I left the Guild factory with my new Starfire and headed back to the hotel in Manhattan. Expensive cab ride, but great bass. I used it on a lot of our successful songs, including “Turn! Turn! Turn!” and “Eight Miles High,” but I lost it a year later when someone broke into our van and stole a bunch of equipment—a common-enough story for bands that spend time out on the road. I never got that bass back but ended up borrowing another one until I finally gave in and went back to playing a Fender.
In 2015, a gentleman named Chris Middaugh, who worked at Guild, came up with the idea of creating a Guild Byrds Starfire bass with the help of John Jorgenson and Tracy Longo, a very talented luthier. It was completed and offered for sale as the Chris Hillman Signature Byrds Bass. The company manufactured a limited run of only seventy-five basses, which sold out very quickly. They were great instruments, and some well-known players bought them. I thought it would be the perfect thing to give Tom, but the rapid sales kept me from being able to find one anywhere in the US. Connie actually ended up locating one in a music store in Germany and had it shipped over. Tom loved it. I only wish Guild would have made seventy-five more. I was as honored by Guild creating that instrument as I was in 2008 when the Martin guitar company put out the Chris Hillman OM-28 model acoustic guitar. To have Guild, Martin, and Tom Petty eager to celebrate my musical legacy was deeply meaningful and truly humbling. When I gave Tom the bass, I thanked him for all his guidance and help. I mentioned that what we created together would probably be my last album, and that it was a wonderful way to end my six decades of recording. Tom just looked at me. “What are you talking about? I’m not done with you yet,” he said. “We need to start thinking about the next record—something with a lot of drums and electric guitars.” To hear that Tom wanted to continue to work with me was good medicine for the soul.
The album, Bidin’ My Time, was released in September of 2017 on Rounder Records. It was great to be back on Rounder, and the entire team was committed to making the record a success at retail and radio. My agent at the time, Paul Lohr, booked a promotional tour, starting on the East Coast, then on to the South and Midwest, and ending on the West Coast. Herb, John, and I performed as a trio on those dates, and everything went extremely well, with great reviews coming in and great feedback from the fans. We arrived in Nashville to play the Grand Ole Opry on Saturday, September 30, and then a show at the City Winery on October 1. Those performances came off really well, but I was shocked the next morning, October 2, when Connie and I turned on the news in our hotel room to learn that Tom Petty had been hospitalized. Some channels were even reporting that he had died. Of course I couldn’t believe it. I was sure there must have been some mistake. Then the phone rang. It was David Crosby calling to ask if I knew what was going on. We talked for a short time, both feeling sad and refusing to believe that Tom could be gone. I hung up the phone, still unsure if my friend had died or not.
By that point, I just wanted to go home. There were four more shows to play in the Midwest before we were to return to perform at the Troubadour on October 16. I didn’t want to do any of it anymore. I was supposed to do a live radio interview in Nashville later that day, but we had our promotions director at Rounder Records cancel it, and we began making plans to return home. The phone rang again. It was Roger McGuinn. I knew then that Tom had really passed. Roger and Tom had been very close over the years, and we were both devastated. I told Roger I was canceling the next four shows, as I was too heartbroken over our friend’s passing to complete the tour. “No,” Roger responded, “you shouldn’t do that! Tom wouldn’t have liked to see you cancel shows. Go out and play the four shows, and all the rest you have booked, as a celebration honoring Tom, his music, and all he has done for you.” True words of wisdom from one of my oldest friends. I took Roger’s advice and we soldiered on, finishing the four gigs in the Midwest. Since Tom’s
funeral and memorial were on the sixteenth, we moved the Troubadour show to the twenty-third instead. We played the Troubadour, but we did it for Tom, not for me.
There aren’t enough pages to contain the words I could write about Tom Petty—a kind and very humble man who took me under his wing for that brief time in early 2017 to produce the best solo record of my career. I got to know Tom very well during our time in the studio, where we sometimes talked for hours about music, our families, our grandkids, and musicians we both knew and had worked with over the years. He was very insightful and extremely intelligent. We hit it off from day one and would have become great pals on the strength of his sense of humor alone. Tom created such a legacy and was such an inspiration to so many. But he also cared about shining the spotlight on others. At the time I worked with him, he had recently produced a wonderful band called The Shelters, guiding them as if they were his younger brothers. If there was anyone who could have ever gotten The Byrds back together in the studio it would have been Tom Petty.
It seems that, with each passing year, loss becomes more and more a part of life. Buck was gone. Michael and Gene were gone. Gram, Chris, and Sneaky were gone. Tom Petty was gone. Even before we lost Tom, I’d had to say goodbye to so many of my compatriots. Tom Brumley passed away from a heart attack in 2009, after relocating his family down to San Antonio, Texas. Tom was always so active and healthy that it seemed he’d live forever. On some of those long Desert Rose Band bus rides, he would keep us laughing and marveling at his incredible stories about playing with Buck Owens and in Rick Nelson’s Stone Canyon Band. I miss him. Less than three months after Tom Brumley passed, Vern Gosdin died of complications from a stroke. Vern was like a big brother to me when I was in The Golden State Boys—always watching out for me, especially when we played some of the more sketchy bars. Vern and I stayed in touch his entire life. He always had the worst jokes. He’d say, “Chris, your career would take off if you just got rid of that banjo player.” Then he’d call Herb the same day and tell him, “Herb, if you’d just get rid of that mandolin player, your career would take off.” We both loved him, and when he sang, it could bring you to tears.
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