by Thad Ward
Ike left the shield to fend off that goblin while dealing with the goblin on his left, which was moving to flank them. He thrust his partisan forward but misjudged the distance, leaving the goblin enough room to jump back from the shallow attack.
Clay hesitated for a moment after seeing Ike’s shield appear, then turned his attention to the goblin on the right. The goblin tried to duck his downward swing, falling back a second too late. Clay’s sickle clipped its shoulder, sending it reeling back into the two fallen goblins. The goblin trying to free himself from beneath his stunned ally once again fell to the ground under the new weight.
“Should I try it?” Clay said.
“Go for it. You won’t get a better opportunity,” Ike said, quickly switching to the goblin on the left and missing a jab at the center goblin. “Just make sure we’re not caught in it.”
Clay stepped forward to the three fallen goblins, two of whom were back on their feet. The one who had been stunned by the shield was sitting and shaking its head. “Minor reaping!” Clay yelled. His sickle took on a bright green glow as he sliced it through the air in front of the three goblins. The glow fanned out in a wide arc, hitting the two standing goblins center mass and the sitting goblin in the face.
The goblin on the ground didn’t have a chance to react; it simply fell over dead, its face reduced to ribbons. The two standing goblins let out high-pitched squeals of pain. They stumbled backward, blood pouring out of the large gashes in their chests, then turned to flee.
“Hell yeah!” Clay said, grinning back to Ike. “Did you see that?”
“Awesome,” Ike said, his voice strained as he swung his partisan between his two opponents. “Now go help Ada. I’ve got these two.”
Ike spared a glance to see how Ada was doing. It was hard to tell from this distance, but one of the goblins driving the sheep appeared to be down with an arrow in its chest. Another was struggling against something binding its leg. The third, however, had closed on Ada, who had dropped her bow and drawn her karambit.
Clay gave a quick nod to Ike and looked toward the old woman. “Don’t worry, ma’am. I’ll get your herd back,” he said before sprinting toward Ada. His form blurred as his movement hastened. For a moment, Ike wasn’t sure what he was seeing, then he realized Clay must have activated Minor Biding.
“Hold on,” Ike said into his ear cuff. “Clay’s on his way. Ugh!” No sooner had he spoken than Ike felt a sharp pain in his side. The goblin on the left had gotten under his guard while he’d been distracted, scoring a hit with its stone spear. The color of Ike’s cloak shifted to a metallic gray shade.
Health: 4 / 6
“Ike?” Ada’s voice came over the ear cuff. “What was that? Are you okay!?”
“Sorry, can’t talk now!” Ike said. He’d never be able to score a solid hit if he was focused on both at once, so he took his concentration off the floating shield and devoted himself to attacking the goblin with the club. The shield whipped out of the way as Ike lunged forward, skewering his target through its stomach.
The goblin dropped its club and howled in pain, clutching the shaft of Ike’s weapon. The goblin with the spear managed to duck Ike’s shield and stab him in the side a second time. This time, however, the spear tip failed to penetrate, letting out a sound of ringing metal as it struck the soft leather around Ike’s midsection.
“Fool me once, shame on you,” Ike said, kicking the fatally wounded goblin to remove it from his partisan.
You have gained experience.
He turned on the spear-wielding goblin, who backpedaled from him with a mixture of confusion and terror on its face. “Fool me twice, shame on me.”
In many ways, Lesser Reactive Ward had been the culmination of Ike’s experiments thus far. It combined the defense increase he’d figured out creating Minor Cold Resistance with the limited duration from Summon Giant Rat and the arbitrary skill requirement from Minor Daydrinking. It had taken a leap of inspiration to invert the weapon damage trigger from Curse Lifting and turn it into a user damage trigger instead, but that allowed him to boost the defense to match the damage received. Other than the three mana drain it cost, Lesser Reactive Ward’s only downside was that Ike had to get hit first, but he had a plan to deal with that, too.
Health: 5 / 6
The tip of Ike’s partisan glowed with a faint crimson aura as the goblin blood coating it slowly vanished. The shaft of the weapon pulsed in his grip hungrily. He stalked toward the spear-wielding goblin. “Thirsty, boy?” Knowing he had nothing to worry about from the goblin’s attacks for a few more seconds, he directed his shield behind it to cut off its escape.
Ike dodged one wild lunge and took a second on his bracer before the goblin’s third attack struck him solidly in the chest. The force of the blow drove Ike back a half step but did no other appreciable damage. He took advantage of the goblin’s surprise by driving his partisan through its chest. The spear fell out of the goblin’s hands and its eyes rolled back in its head as it fell lifeless to the ground.
Health: 6 / 6
You have gained experience.
Ike breathed heavily and admired the grim beauty of his partisan drinking up the goblin’s blood. Minor Vampirism combined the weapon damage trigger from Curse Lifting with the blood requirement from Blood Trail and the health regeneration effect from Minor Daydrinking. It hadn’t needed the same imagination as Lesser Reactive Ward, but the effect was nonetheless impressive.
“All clear over here,” Ike said into his ear cuff. He could see that Ada and Clay had dispatched the goblin that had closed range and were finishing off the other two without apparent difficulty.
“We’ll be along in just a minute,” Ada said. “Clay’s going to calm the herd down and I’m going to loot the goblins over here.”
Ike turned toward the old woman, who was sitting on the ground and cradling her wounded leg with shaking fingers. “Sorry for all the violence, ma’am,” he said gently, kneeling. “You should be safe now. My friends are tending to your flock. Can I bandage that for you?”
The woman nodded weakly. Ike sat next to her, taking off his backpack and preparing bandages as Idalia had shown him. He gently pried the woman’s hands away and wrapped the wound.
Clay and Ada walked up as Ike worked. Clay deposited a limp goblin on the ground. Ada watched over Ike’s shoulder. “You’re going to have to teach me that,” she said. “Potions are nice, but probably not as economical.”
“Sure thing,” Ike said. He glanced up at the two of them. Clay had added a slash across his forearm to the wound on his leg and Ada was cradling her elbow. “Looks like you could use a first-hand demonstration. Take a seat.”
Your Healing Arts skill has increased to level 2.
As Ike tended to everyone’s wounds, Clay did his best to calm the old woman down. Once she’d gotten over her shock, she was more than happy to share stories about missing farm animals, strange noises in the mountains, and green devils in the night. Her wound had been wide but shallow and she was eager to move the herd to safer pastures, so she professed her thanks and parted company with the party a few minutes later.
“Two things, Clay,” Ike said. “First, you don’t have to say the name of your ability to use it. I mean, you can if you want. I just wanted to make sure you knew sounding like an anime character was optional.”
Clay laughed. “Yeah. Sorry about that. I might have gotten a little carried away.”
Ike laughed along with him and continued. “Second, well done. I mean it. There’s no need for you to feel like a newb. I had a hard time with two of these guys but you were able to take down three in the blink of an eye. I’m glad to have you with us.”
Ada had been looting the corpses of the goblins. She walked up counting out a small handful of copper coins and handing each person their share. “He helped with my three, also. Thanks a lot, Clay.”
Clay rubbed the back of his head and looked away. “Ada’s weren’t much of a challenge. The one sparring with h
er was half dead by the time I got there. Another one was caught in some sort of bear trap and was all but helpless. And that one’s been out like a light since I showed up.” Clay jammed a thumb over his shoulder at the limp goblin he’d been carrying.
“Dusk Shadow,” Ada explained. “It’s a simple sleep poison. I put it in a dart trap on my arrow. I figured we might want to question one of them. Of course, that was before I remembered the part where they don’t speak our language.”
Ike looked toward the goblin and rubbed his chin. “How long will it last?”
“Only a few more minutes,” Ada said. “At least that’s what the alchemy book said.”
Ike dug around in his pouch, placing the new coins in their dedicated section. He’d hastily shoved his map on top, so he took a moment to roll it properly and tuck it into his backpack. It was then that he noticed the unopened letter from the game master. “How do you guys feel about stopping for lunch?” Ike asked, still looking down at the letter. He grabbed the rope from his backpack and held it up for the others to see. “We can tie the goblin up while we figure out what to do next.”
Clay accepted the rope from Ike. “I can handle that. I’m not sure if there’s a dedicated rope use skill, but I’ve had to tie up plenty of things over the last week and a half.”
Ada’s eyes drifted down to the letter. Ike saw her visibly struggle to look up at him without asking about it. “The two that ran after Clay hit them left a pretty clear trail,” she said. “We could follow that.”
Ike nodded. “It’s as good a plan as any. I don’t get the impression goblins are smart enough to leave a false trail or flee in a direction other than their lair.” Ike shrugged. “Still, I’d like to know more about what to expect if we can. And you guys need a bit to recover even with the first aid.”
After Clay had hogtied the goblin, the three sat and ate a simple lunch, each sharing a bit of what they’d brought: Ike’s dried fruit, Ada’s baked potatoes, and a loaf of bread Clay had received from his farming trainer that morning. Ike could swear it was still warm from the oven. When he offered to add some of his salted pork to make sandwiches, nobody objected.
While they ate, Ike retrieved the letter from his pouch.
Once again, it had an interesting enchantment. “Hmm,” Ike said aloud. “That may come in handy right away.”
“What?” Clay said, his mouth half-full from a bite of sandwich. “A letter?”
“He means the enchantment on it,” Ada said. They had already explained the basic artificer mechanics to Clay but omitted the fact that Ike could create unique enchantments. “What’s it say?” she asked. Ike couldn’t tell if she was eager for the information inside or just trying to gloss over the previous topic to avoid tricky follow-up questions.
Ike opened the letter and read it quietly.
Hello Mr. Fennell,
The situation remains unchanged. We recognize the difficulty this must be placing on you and invite you to pray for further assistance at any time. If you do so, please reference the issue number from my prior correspondence. Barring that, I will follow up again within the next three days.
Kind regards,
Neil F. Salcena
Senior Engineer
Ike’s eyes widened and the paper crinkled as he clenched it. “Three days now, huh? And what fucking issue number?” Ike began digging through his pouch and backpack looking for the first two letters.
“What’s wrong?” Clay asked. He stuck fingers in his mouth one at a time to suck off the remaining morsels of food.
Ada remained silent, so Ike gave Clay a clipped reply. “The GMs are assholes who keep stringing me along. Now I won’t even hear back about my issue for another three days.”
“Is there anything we can do to help?” Ada said softly.
Ike found the previous two letters and scanned them. “Beat some sense into this Salcena guy if you meet him,” he said. He shook his head and slapped the papers. “There’s no damn issue number in any of these.”
“That sucks, man,” Clay said. He patted his stomach contentedly. “Anyway, what did you mean about the letter being useful.”
Ike took a deep breath. “There’s a sort of linguistic enchantment on the letter. I’m wondering if it can be used to speak goblin.” He very carefully dodged the question of how he’d pull that off while avoiding an outright lie, though he didn’t get the impression Clay was going to be that quick on the uptake. He cast Harvest Enchantment on the letter and watched as the usual notifications scrolled past, then opened his enchanting interface. “Try to wake our friend over there while I figure this out.”
The Illiteracy enchantment bore the same hallmarks as Confidentiality and Consignment, leading Ike to conclude they'd all been written by the same programmer. The code was a work of art, but the comments were plagued with misspellings. It didn't affect how the program ran, of course. It just made things harder for the next person who had to maintain it, which was considered bad form by most professional programmers.
The goblin let out a shriek, causing Ike to lose focus for a moment. “Ha! That did it,” Clay said. “Hey Ike, Ada woke him up whenever you’re ready.”
“Give me a few more minutes,” Ike said, reopening his interface. There wasn’t much to the enchantment. Dropping the part of the code that attuned the enchantment to a particular user was a piece of cake. Switching the target from written words to spoken words and inverting the effect to add understanding rather than removing it might have been difficult, but Ike was pleased to see these were built-in parameters. The only tricky bit was limiting the enchantment enough to be a level he could apply.
Ike did his best to ignore the goblin’s piteous wailing as he worked. “Okay, I think I’ve got it,” Ike said a few minutes later. “Ada, mind if I borrow back the ear cuff?”
“Why?” Ada said, frowning. It may have been Ike’s imagination, but there was some genuine reluctance in her tone.
“Just for a minute,” Ike said. “I don’t have any other items that’ll work for this one. I’ll swap the enchantments back as soon as we’re done.” He took off his ear cuff. “Here. I’ll put mine on the goblin and yours on me so it doesn’t get dirty or anything.”
Ada continued frowning but reached up and took off the ear cuff, handing it over to Ike. He cast Harvest Enchantment and followed it with a new enchantment, inspecting his work.
“Looks good,” Ike said, putting Ada’s ear cuff on his ear as promised. “Mind holding his head still, Clay?”
Clay knelt and put his arm under the goblin’s neck from behind, hoisting it up for Ike. The creature strained against the ropes binding it and croaked in protest, but couldn’t draw in enough air to make noise. Ike slipped the ear cuff over the top of the goblin’s elongated earlobe and gestured for Clay to put him down.
The goblin coughed. “Filthy barrel breaker! Why so rough!?”
Ike raised his eyebrow as the enchantment took effect. He knelt to get on eye level with the sitting goblin. “Can you understand me?” Ike said.
The goblin’s eyes opened wide. It straightened as much as its ropes would allow. “Milk hair speaks goblish?!”
Ike nodded. “For now. What’s your name?”
The goblin sneered. “I tell you nothing, milk hair! Not you or barrel breaker or thorn thrower! You kill Ibril’s clan!”
Ike chuckled to hear his theory confirmed: These creatures weren’t very bright. “That answers my question. Ibril, is it? Well, Ibril, you and your clan just attacked an old woman and tried to steal her flock. Then you attacked us when we came to her defense.”
Ibril narrowed his beady eyes. “Old crone does not need so many woolsies. She dies soon. Clan needs them more. We hunt.”
Ike shook his head. “It doesn’t work that way, Ibril. Those sheep belong to the old woman. If you take them or hurt her, lots of other humans will come to hurt you and take them back.”
“Humans always take,” Ibril spat. “Clan must hide in caves. Get big one to pr
otect us.”
Ike feigned concern even though this was going exactly as he’d hoped. “Big one? You have a big one that can hurt us?”
Ibril strained forward, gnashing his teeth at Ike as he spoke. “Yes! Big scaly one is king of cave! King of clan! He comes to avenge us!”
“He seems worked up,” Ada whispered from next to Ike. “What’s he saying?”
Ike had forgotten only he could understand the goblin. He slipped his ear cuff off so Ibril wouldn’t understand. “Well, aside from a few colorful nicknames, I’ve confirmed that they’re not very smart, have no concept of laws, and work for some sort of big scaly boss who lives in their cave.”
“Jackpot,” Clay said. “Where’s the cave at?”
“I was just getting to that,” Ike said, slipping the ear cuff back on and turning back to Ibril. “Barrel breaker and thorn thrower say the king of your clan is weak. Humans are strong. We defeated your clan. We can defeat your king, too.”
Ibril laughed, a deeply unsettling noise that sounded like a frog croaking. “You will die. King will tear your flesh. Drink your blood. Eat your bones. Then everyone in stone circle.”
“Stone circle?” Ike squinted at the goblin. He guessed the enchantment only did so much to convey the speaker’s meaning. “You mean the walls around the city? Your king will attack the city?”
“Soon, yes!” Ibril grinned, showing his yellow, jagged teeth. “King comes for all! Then goblins take stone circle! Have all woolsies!”
Ike glowered at the goblin and retrieved his partisan, placing the blade under Ibril’s neck. “I can’t say I like the sound of that. I guess we need to talk to this king of yours first.”
Ibril’s demeanor shifted from malice to fear in an instant. “Wait! Ibril has… children! Yes, Ibril has mate and family! And other name! Ibril…,” his gaze drifted over to Ada, “Thorntooth! Yes! Ibril is interesting! Important! Kind milk hair would not kill Ibril!”
“I’m not sure what he’s saying,” Ada said from behind Ike, “but he’s lying through his teeth.”
