“That was a little strange,” Myla commented as we got close to the exit.
“Yeah, it could have been pretty awkward. Thanks for saving me back there.” It was true that in the moment, I was pretty frustrated with Myla jumping into the conversation, but at the end of the day, she had done the right thing—and, it was true that I really only had eyes for Sean. As wrong as that was, I just couldn’t help it.
Chapter 8
Whistler
“Here you are, good sir, one soy pumpkin spice latte and a gouda and egg sandwich without bacon.” McBee slid into the passenger’s seat of our squad car and handed me my breakfast order. “Do you know how awesome I am?” She glanced over at me with a coy smile as she blew on her steaming double latte and took a bite of her bacon, egg, and cheese sandwich.
“Here we go again,” I teased, taking a bite of my breakfast.
Jessica started laughing as I pulled out into bustling New York City traffic. “Do you know how much shit you would get if the rest of the department knew you have the taste buds of a nineteen-year-old sorority girl?”
“Not liking bacon does not make me basic.” Rolling my eyes, I grunted at her as the sweet smell of our lattes took over the vehicle. “And besides, a man who is not in touch with his feminine side doesn’t know how many tasty things he is missing out on in the world.”
A rusted-out white van clunked next to us at a light. Looking over, I couldn’t help but notice that the driver was talking on his cell phone. I flipped on the lights and siren, pulling the jalopy over.
“They made that one easy,” I remarked as I got ready to get out of the car.
McBee ran the plates. “Not the most savory characters in the world, but they don’t have any warrants out on them or anything.”
My gut was telling me this was going to be an interesting stop. The van resembled what people joked about being a rapist van—whited-out windows, rust and holes all over the place, scratches and dents galore.
Walking up to the driver’s door, I tapped on his window with the back of my flashlight. Jessica stood at the ready by the right side of the van, waiting for my signal.
As the window cranked down, the driver attempted to grin at me. The lack of teeth and the rotting of the ones that were still there screamed years of drug use. “What’s the problem officer?” he asked with a very even tone.
“You can’t be on your cell phone while operating a vehicle in the state of New York,” I stated. “License, insurance, and registration.” Peering past the driver, I looked to his passenger, who was sweating bullets. “I need your license as well, sir.”
With shaking hands, the passenger got his identification out of his wallet and handed it to me. I glanced into the back of the van to see an old metal Christmas tree stand, one that resembled the one my family had while I was growing up. “You boys off to get a tree?”
The driver looked at me like I had six heads as the passenger answered, “N-No, s-s-sir. We’re heading to d-do a little last m-minute sh-shopping.”
I walked back over to the car, and McBee met me. “Warning?” She looked over at me, waiting for the cue to start writing up a ticket for them or not.
“Yeah. It is Christmas after all, right?” I shrugged, looking down at their paperwork. It all seemed to check out, and I was not in the mood to ruin any days for minor issues.
She nodded. “That is very non-Scroogey of you, Whistler.” She flashed me her sweet smile, the one that made her eyes sparkle, and I melted. Ever since the other night at the bar, I couldn’t get my partner out of my head, even more so than usual. Thankfully, she seemed completely clueless about my crush, and I had every intention of keeping it that way.
Handing the driver all their documents back, I leaned on the door with one elbow. “I’m going to let you two off with a warning, but keep that phone in your pocket while you’re driving, ya hear?”
The passenger leaned over, looking me dead in the eyes with his pupils dilated and sweat beading on his forehead. “B-But, R-R-Ricky, how is-is the m-mother ship going to be able t-to f-f-find us if we d-d-don’t have the c-c-calling d-d-device out?”
The driver shot me a nervous glance. “You have to excuse him, sir. My brother here isn’t all with it upstairs, if you catch my drift.”
“You boys be safe now.” I tapped my fist on the side of the vehicle and made my way over to Jessica. As we got back into our squad car, I let out the rolling laugh I had been fighting since that passenger opened his mouth.
“What?” McBee nudged me as I hugged the steering wheel, tears welling up in my eyes. I wasn’t sure if I was laughing at the situation or if the situation was making me emotional about my upbringing—probably a little of both.
“They’re looking for their mother ship,” I responded.
Her jaw dropped. “Never a dull moment in this job, is there?”
I shook my head. “Nah, I just hope they find it. It would be terrible to spend the holidays stuck on Earth, so far away from their family and home.” I meant it more as a sincere sentiment, because that man truly did seem concerned. It was moments like that when I was truly thankful for having the friends I had.
“Have you ever known someone a little loose in the noggin?” McBee asked innocently.
I glanced over at her with a tight-lipped smile. “Yeah, my mother.”
In the middle of the night, I got home from my shift at the restaurant. It was a Friday night, and the owner had needed me to stay late to help clean up the kitchen from a busier-than-hell night.
“Ma!” I called into the house. It was weird that every light was on in the sprawling home. Usually when Dad was away on a business trip, she’d fall asleep early while reading in the sitting room off the master bedroom. “Ma? You still awake?”
“Sean?” I could see her out on the patio, frantically waving for me to join her as she put her finger over her lips, signaling for me to stay quiet.
“Ma? What is it?” I whispered as I shut the glass door behind me, making my way over to her.
“Shhhh!” She grabbed my hand, pulling me into her side. Getting up on her tiptoes, she leaned in close to my ear. “They’re trying to get me.”
She darted away, yanking me closer to the side of the house as she crouched down, pointing at the window screen. She was in her favorite lavender nightgown and silk robe that matched, hair in a messy ponytail, barefoot.
“Ma, what are you pointing at?” I asked, frustrated that she was having another one of her episodes. Apparently, my father had forgotten to pick up her refill at the pharmacy before he left the morning before. It wasn’t unusual for him to forget, he counted care less about my mother’s mental health or even me for that matter. All he cared about was landing another big account or his next big building project. He was a great provider but a shitty husband and father. I would have traded all of the wealth in the world to have a caring father and a healthy mother.
“Don’t you see the faces? They’re evil. They’re trying to get inside my mind.” She rocked back and forth, the heels of her hands jammed hard into her eyes as tears mixed with makeup poured down her cheeks.
I wrapped my arms around her. “Ma, if they’re trying to get you then we need to go inside and close the blinds. They can’t get you if you can’t see them.”
Her eyes got wide as she grabbed for my hand. “You’re right. Yes, yes, let’s do that. Come, come.”
We darted around the house, closing every damn blind and curtain. Finally, once she felt safe, we sat on her favorite plush couch in her sitting room. Tucking her into my side, I wrapped a blanket around us.
Kissing the top of her head, I whispered, “Get some rest, Ma.”
“I love you, Sean. Thank you for being such a sweet boy and not letting the monsters get me.”
That was the night I realized monsters were real and I was going to have find a way to always fight them away, whether it was for my mother or anyone else. I knew I never wanted anyone to experience fear like my mother had j
ust felt if I could help it at all.
Chapter 9
McBee
“Ready for your first concert?” Sean asked as he turned off the engine of our cruiser.
Unbuckling my seatbelt, I raised an eyebrow at him. “Don’t think I can hack it, do ya, Whistler?”
Sean rubbed the back of his neck before reaching for the door handle to get out of the car. “It’s just a big event. They’re a whole different animal than our normal beat. You know I have complete faith in you, McBee.”
Our playful banter was normal, but the way it was making me feel was new. I really needed to get my feelings for my partner in check, or shit was going to escalate extremely fast. I knew neither of us was ready for something like that. I definitely was not ready for Sean to not be my partner anymore, and if my feelings for him got out, that was exactly what would have to happen.
We started walking toward the area where the tour buses were about to pull in with the bands and their crews all loaded inside. “I guess I’m just going to have to stick close to you, then. Oh, captain, my captain.” I hooked my arm in his for a brief second to finish out the joke, but he pulled away from me.
“Sorry?” I dug my hands into my pockets, feeling a little scorned. Did I take it too far? I felt like it was a completely normal move for us—how could I be reading him so poorly all of a sudden?
Sean nudged me with his elbow. “There are going to be a lot of us here, and I don’t want anyone to get the wrong impression.” The frown that consumed my partner’s face was alarming. I had never seen him look so disappointed in all the time we had spent together, and I had no idea what he was actually upset about. We always joked around when we were working. I guess concerts really are that different.
Quickly, my attention was taken away from the awkward situation as the door of my favorite band’s tour bus swung open.
Deep breaths.
Deep.
Slow.
Breaths.
I had to force myself to not start fangirling as I watched the members of The Hysterics start to descend the stairs of their gigantic bus, making their way backstage.
The drummer, Dane, was hand in hand with his wife, Fallon, and I totally melted on the spot. Their story was one for the ages, and I couldn’t help but be completely infatuated with them and how much they loved each other. Fallon Dunbar and Dane Pearson ranked up there on my celebrity couple list as high as Hugh Jackman and Deborra-Lee Furness—they were just couples you rooted for to beat the odds.
I was so stoked to be working an event where I would finally get to see The Hysterics live for the first time. It was a damn dream come true.
“I hope they play The Lifespan of a Firefly,” Sean whispered as we both watched them walk only a few feet away from us.
“No way!” I punched him in the shoulder.
Taking a step back, he gave me a bewildered look. “What the hell?” he asked while rubbing the spot I’d just hit.
“How did I not know you’re a fan too?” I started to let a little of my crazy loose as I bounced in place.
Sean gave me a small crooked grin. “I’ve been following them since that concert where Dane broke his hand on that douche Kenneth Rhodes’ face and Fallon had to play for him.”
I squealed a little. “That was freaking epic! I remember reading about that on Raging Underground’s site the next morning.”
“Yeah, I was actually there that night. Gavin had a game in Chicago and the night after, we went to that show. It was pretty incredible. Fallon is a seriously talented drummer, and I couldn’t believe she outed herself like that.”
I bit the inside of my cheek to try to stop the goofy grin that was taking over my entire face.
“What?” Sean asked.
“You’re just something else, Whistler. I’m really glad we’re partners.”
He gently tapped me on the shoulder, almost like he was going to hug me, but then changed his mind. “I’m glad we’re friends.” His broad chest puffed out as he sucked in a deep breath. “Now, enough of this sappy bestie shit. We have a job to do.”
Most of our night was spent keeping drunken concertgoers from becoming a drunk and disorderly mob. It was an exasperating job, to say the least, but I hadn’t had so much fun working in a while. Right after Three Ugly Guys played their encore, The Hysterics took the stage, opening with Sean’s and my favorite song. I swayed to the music as I sang every word of the chorus to myself.
It’s a dull kind of pain that just sits in my heart and weighs me down
And you’re the only one who can fix it
It burns and erupts at the worst times
Stinging old wounds that have already been licked clean
Right when headway is made, the darkness crashes again
Closing in on my starlight
Little flicks of magic extinguished one by one
The firefly’s lifespan gets tested over and over
Thankfully, she is inked into existence for all eternity
As the song came to an end, someone crashed right into me, tumbling down at my feet. As he clambered to stand, I spun around on my heels. Suddenly, I was face to chest with the same guy from the bar and the mall—Vinnie.
“We have to stop meeting like this—and lookie there, you actually are a lady cop, prettiest one I have ever seen. Definitely no man hands there.” Vinnie’s words slurred together as he rambled, and I could see Sean going into defensive mode.
“How much have you had to drink tonight, sir?” Sean’s chest puffed out and I could tell he was about to get in Vinnie’s face.
Vinnie threw his hands in the air as I stepped between them. “Sean, this is Vinnie. He was one of the guys in the fight the other night at the bar, and then Myla and I ran into him at the mall a few days later.”
Sean growled in my ear. “You can’t let punks like this think we’re their friends when they act like fucking ruffians.”
“Ruffians? What has your panties in a twist, Whistler?” Sean getting so flustered over us running into this guy was completely out of character. Usually, he was the first one to jump in with a witty comment or perfect little jab.
“Yeah, Whistler.” Vinnie was not helping matters, and Sean was getting ready to fly off the rails.
“What did you say to me punk?” Sean spit out through gritted teeth as he stepped around me to get closer to Vinnie.
Quickly, I got back in between them. I put my hand on Sean’s chest and turned to Vinnie. “Why don’t you go find your friends and enjoy the rest of the concert? Maybe we’ll run into each other another time.”
Vinnie bowed his head as he started to walk away, heading back toward the stage. “Yeah, okay. Sorry, officer.”
Once Vinnie was out of earshot, I glared at Sean. “What in the ever-loving fuck was that, Sean?”
He crossed his arms over his chest. “What was up with that guy? Are you trying to date criminals now?”
I threw my hands in the air. “Wow! Now you have definitely lost your damn mind. It was questionable there for a second, and now I know for sure—you’re fucking crazy.”
I started to walk away from Sean to be sure I counted to ten enough times to not jump completely down his throat. Before I could even make it five steps away, Sean’s hand was on my wrist, pulling me back toward him. He took a few deep breaths before making eye contact with me, his hand still firmly gripping my arm.
“You’re right, I am crazy.” Before his words could even register in my mind, Sean’s fingers were knotting in my short curls as his lips crashed against mine.
Chapter 10
Whistler
Standing in the middle of Times Square with our favorite band playing in the background and thousands of fans crammed around us, I stood holding Jessica, kissing her fiercely. Being in full uniform and on the clock was not an ideal time for that embrace to take place, but I just couldn’t stand it a second longer. If McBee was going to be with anyone, it needed to be me, and in that moment with that jerk trying
to flirt with her right in front of me, I knew it was then or never.
Jessica pulled away from me for a second. “Well, that was not what I was expecting.”
I took a few steps back, still holding on to her wrist. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”
“Oh, Whistler, sometimes you have to throw the rulebook out the window and live a little.” Jessica moved her hand so our fingers could interlock. “Come on.”
She started to drag me back toward where our car was parked. “What are we doing?” I tried to stop her, but she yanked me harder to get me to follow.
Glancing over her shoulder, she winked. “You’re not going to just kiss me and not act on all those pent-up feelings, are you?”
The fire that lit in her eyes ignited the ember I had been kindling deep down, lighting a blaze inside me. The wheels started turning, and all I could think about was getting Jessica into the back seat of that damn car so I could act out all the fantasies that had been plaguing my dreams for so long. I didn’t give a shit that we were supposed to be working—there were enough men and women in blue to take care of the crowd. All I cared about was making Jessica mine, completely and totally mine, right there in that moment.
I slid into the back seat after her and we started to rip off our uniforms. “Damn this cold weather gear.” I groaned, yanking off my jacket and throwing it onto the floorboard.
The cold air mixed with the heat that was radiating from our bodies, fogging up the windows of the car within seconds. The back seat was cramped as fuck but with a little awkward maneuvering, Jessica’s gorgeous curvy body was lying on top of mine. Our lips moved together in a soft, passionate dance as she moaned, sending electricity coursing all throughout my body.
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