They would not go the way she had. They deserved better than this.
***
Galron and Brute looked at him like he was a crazy man. Mayhap he was.
“They are leaving tomorrow and without us?” Galron asked.
Eldron nodded. They were in his private rooms having been called to him. Brute knocked back his wine.
“You both messed up. Taking the females out without proper escort was a mistake. Eleanor is…… upset and determined that they will make good matches or she will make my life a living hell if this doesn’t happen.”
They both mumbled words of concern and apology. They had not thought. He knew that was true.
“You will not be welcome at the castle you know this, and the females will not be allowed near you anyway. You know that too.”
He turned to Brute. “Nothing to say warrior?”
The male was as deadly as he was calm. “If that is what they wish, so be it.”
“Fuck!” Galron threw his goblet turning to Brute. “You give up so easily? I see you watch her. You are as in as deep as I am.”
Brute showed no emotion as Eldron gave them both a moment. Tempers were raw. Eldron didn’t need to see it to know it was there. It interfered with their ability to function if their minds are on other things. As his did. He held his sympathy for them, he needed it for himself.
“You need to decide what it is you want brothers. If you want the females or not and if so, I will support your wishes but, if you do, you will have to offer marriage, money and lands and even then, their father may object. He needs alliances and already has one with me.”
The room was quiet. He knew their loyalty was to him and like Makas, both their lands were managed by reliable seconds. This was a life they chose not to give up, or hadn’t, until now.
“They must go back,” he told them firmly.
Neither moved. Evidence of their mixed emotions crossed both their faces, even Brute’s. “Of course,” he told them. “There may be a way to make an alliance with each of you more….. favourable….”
They glanced up and he pointed to the map in front of him. They both rose and came to him. “The lands here, here and here boarder our own. Here and here boarder their fathers. He has less to offer in an alliance than we do. I was happy to leave it to him but now…..”
“We could make those alliances for him and offer them once secured.” Brute answered the crease of a smile on his lips.
“A bargain that would be difficult to refuse.” Stated Galron.
Eldron smiled. “Indeed brothers.”
“We will leave today,” Brute looked at Galron and he nodded.
“Be sure. If you go, you go as the Lords you are with every intent on taking wives.” They nodded.
“Be quick. Get the alliances and decide if you want them or not. There will be no going back and even with these alliances, it is not guaranteed he will accept you, but it will give you the ammunition to try if that is what you want. Take Patris and Ranulf with you, they might find something in each of those Lords households to their liking too.” He laughed and they laughed with him.
Both men clasped his arm. Neither said another word. Thanks, were not needed. They were his brothers in arms and he would support their decisions. Either way, it was good for him. Those alliances would come in very handy. If he was pushed, he’d push back. Hard.
***
Both Olivia and Asa came running in. Asa was weeping quietly, and Olivia was close to it, both angry. Eleanor came rushing to meet them.
“What’s happened.”
“Their gone,” Asa hiccupped.
“What? Who’s gone?”
“Galron and Brute, he’s sent them on a mission. We didn’t even get a chance to say goodbye.” Wailed Asa. Olivia bit her lip tears in her eyes.
“Did you do this?” Olivia asked accusingly.
Eleanor frowned. “No I did not. This is the first I’m hearing of it.”
“But you’re happy now aren’t you?” Olivia wailed.
She’d asked Eldron to keep the men from her sisters and he’d clearly done more than that.
“Come and sit down.” They moved with her. Asa’s tears flowing freely now. She was wiping her eyes and hiccupping.
“You care for them?” She looked at both of them. They both nodded.
Eleanor sighed. “You know father would never approve,” she told them sadly. They both nodded and started crying again.
“We thought that if father didn’t think he’d get good alliances with us, it might work out. It did for you,” cried Asa.
Eleanor sighed. Stupid girls. Too romantic by far. “I could ask Eldron for you, but you still need to leave tomorrow, and I will see if I can arrange for both warriors to attend you on their travels?”
Both faces lit up. “Really, you would do that?” Asa asked rubbing her face dry.
She loved her sisters and knew them well. If they were genuine with their affections, time would hold them to them.
“Yes, I will. Now some lunch and I will help you pack.”
***
She woke from her nap and found him sitting quietly with her. She’d eaten and helped her sisters then withdrawn as she felt tired once more.
“You are not cold?” he asked.
She straightened herself and her clothing. “No my Lord, I thank thee for your concern but during the day, it is never so bad as at night. I hear from my sisters that your men have left on a mission. They are upset.”
He thought she looked sleepy and beautiful. A look he was becoming very attached to and missed when not with her.
“You were right, their actions were thoughtless, and the mission was needed,” he told her honestly. “They have grown fond of your sisters and….. well your father….”
“Indeed Lord.” She told him. “It is as I feared. They are good strong men and the feelings are mutual, but I see no way forward.” She slowly shook her head. “Ironic is it not, that a bonding is wanted where another is not but is.”
He ignored the taunt. “One way or another it will work out. Life has a way of doing that.”
Eleanor wondered if he really believed that. She didn’t agree but kept that to herself. “I will bow to your better judgement.” He looked at her wearily and Eleanor bristled. “I am not unrulily.”
“Thank the Gods,” he told her smiling. “I don’t think I could cope.”
It was Eleanor’s turn to laugh. “I am a handful; I apologise but cannot say it won’t happen again.”
“I am forewarned. However, I like your spit and fire.”
Eleanor looked up surprised. “You do?”
How long had it been since someone amused him so much?....
He couldn’t remember. “Yes I do woman.”
She smiled and her face lit up. Eldron wasn’t sure if she’d still be smiling when she found out why he’d sent his men off. For now, it didn’t matter.
“You mentioned a Spring Festival. Would we be invited?” he asked.
Eleanor thought about it. “Anyone associated with my father would be invited. It’s a good six months off but we should be.”
“Good, I expect you’d like to see your parents and sisters at that time.”
“I would.”
“Then we should go. Mayhap you could do a festival here as well. We have not had such in the way of celebrations for many years. I was always off fighting anyway and I’m unsure if the staff did anything.”
“They did, still do,” she told him. He looked at her in surprise. “I spoke with Kate about how things ran here. I’d like to help her as I did in the castle if that meets with your approval.”
He nodded. “I would like that.”
Eleanor clasped her hands together. “Good that is settled then.”
She wasn’t sure how to broach the subject without upsetting him, but she needed a role if she was to stay.
“Kate does a fabulous job as your housekeeper. She was a good choice.”
“My m
other’s choice not mine.”
Eleanor inclined her head in knowing that. “Still, even so, you could have relieved her of the post but did not. It was a wise move.” She swallowed.
“I need a role here Eldron and not Kates,” she whispered. She needed to know what he was going to do with her once her sisters were gone.
She wondered if he’d heard her. He didn’t respond. She waited unsure if too say it more clearly. Then he did.
“As a noble female, the only one in this Keep, they will look to you. I cannot change that. Find a role or not, it is your choice, but I fear they will seek you out for your input and welcome it anyway.”
She knew he was right. It was the way of things.
“In which case, I would ask that you formally recognise me as your Ward, not your intended to the people here. I’m sure they have knowledge of you sharing my bed and I would prefer not to have a name for men doing so.” He stiffened and she carried on.
“I do not wish to cause you problems and mayhap it is time for you to tell me what man you are giving me too? It is better said and my role here clear for all to see. It would be easier all round for both of us, particularly as neither of us wish to be the butt of anyone’s jokes about what you….. do abroad.”
Eldron held in his anger, he’d created this situation and now he had to deal with it. He huffed. “Your father will not be happy with you being my Ward Eleanor and another man fucking you.” She closed her eyes to his words, but he carried on.
“War could result with your mother leading the troops.”
Eleanor sat not knowing what to say. His words cut her. She could imagine her mother doing it. “I doubt that, he wants this alliance and I can handle it. My sisters can testify I am making up my own mind.”
She shifted. “What would be difficult is living a lie and pretending, while you are free to do as you wish, and I will…. have people whispering behind my back.”
She swallowed her chest tight. “Sooner or later father would hear of it.”
He wanted to grant her wish but knew things weren’t that simple. There was no way he would be giving her to anyone but himself. He knew now that he should never have offered hostageship to her. He’d thrown it at her in anger, to hurt her as her words had seemed to hurt him. Doing so now would break the contract causing tensions with her father he did not need.
He’d spent days going over the contract with the Priest. There was no wiggle room. It stated clearly ‘marriage’, not bonding or joining. He could have used those words to mean remain in his care, granting her ‘hostageship’ being his Ward, but that wouldn’t work with the words ‘upon marriage’ and he knew it. It would also interfere with his plans for further alliances. He couldn’t and wouldn’t do it.
Equally, he now knew he didn’t want anything but marriage.
He had to be honest with her on this and stood.
“No. That cannot be done. Your letters would be a waste of time. I’m sorry Eleanor, the contract is tightly bound. I have been with the Priest these passed days and we cannot find a way around it. You may not wish to be together as man and wife and I will try and respect your wishes on that but, we must continue as if everything is how it should be. Your father has demanded it and there is no breaking it as I had hoped. I was wrong to say I could offer it, I know now I can’t. The priest will marry us tomorrow morning before your sisters leave so your father has his proof of settlement. You may then retire to these rooms unmolested and remain that way as you wish.”
Eleanor stood now facing him her confusion and anger boiling.
“You cannot be serious. We had an agreement. You made it clear where we stood.” She pointed out the window. “You just fucked a barmaid last week!”
Eldron sneered. She would never forget that. He had royally messed this up.
“Be ready before breakfast.” He left.
“You bastard!” Eleanor cried out after him in her frustrations.
She would never agree, she’d kill him first....
Yes, he reminded himself. He was indeed a bastard.
***
She didn’t remember much of the eve meal or waking in the night to find him there. She’d ignored him when he called to her and turned away from him, telling him to leave her alone, not inviting him to her bed.
Morning came all too quickly and before she knew it, her sisters were dressing her in fine linens and expensive silks and leading her to the great hall that was filled with members of the Keep and both their soldiers. She felt like a fraud.
It was filled with winter foliage and roaring fires and looked so pretty but she had no joy in it. And the Priest stood with Eldron by the top table. Eleanor nearly stopped, the visual too much. He looked powerful and magnificent in his finery and a reminder that he wasn’t really hers. All the while her mind spun telling her this was not real. It couldn’t be and yet, here she was facing her fate.
Her sisters smiling faces pulled her forward, both so happy for her and she went with them. Complete and utter fear flowed through her.
He would own her with this….
Eldron faced forward with his hand held out to her. She didn’t want to take it. Eleanor clasped her own tightly to Asa until she unhooked it and placed it on his on the bible. Olivia lifted her vail and the Priest began.
Eleanor went to pull her hand back and found it held tightly in his. The Priest’s words continued, her head swam, her hand sweaty.
He said ‘I do’ and the Priest looked at her expectantly.
Eleanor started to hyperventilate. She thought of what this would mean to those she loved, to those that mattered. How she could help save lives if war came and all the while she just wanted to run.
It was too much, she didn’t want it, this was not her life. She went to pull her hand from his and he called her name.
Her body shook and she started to panic, and she said…. “I do.”
A cheer went up and Eleanor pulled her hand from his and jumped stepping back her legs like jelly. She would not have him kiss her. She couldn’t look at him while her sisters kissed her excitedly, everyone clapped around them and suddenly, she was turned to face those who congratulated them. Her body still shaking.
She was weeping uncontrollably… she couldn’t help it. They were not tears of joy.
O hell. She was married…..
How she got through the wedding breakfast she did not know and was grateful when it was time to see her sisters and their troop off, with promises of coming to the Spring Fayre.
They’d asked her to give their wishes to both Galron and Brute. She said she would, hugging them close and kissing them goodbye. She held her smile as a hole in her heart opened up and bled as she watched them leave.
Knowing this was her life now and once out of sight, her smiled dropped and she headed towards her rooms wondering what next.
She had no idea.
She was glad Eldron had made his excuses and she’d barely heard him when he’d left her at breakfast. In honesty, she was glad to be without him so she could think clearly, she hadn’t acknowledged him since the wedding and wasn’t sure she could. Or even stand to look at him right now. He was just too much, too big, too close, too everything.
Everything in her hurt. Including her soul.
She couldn’t breathe around him. She wanted things she shouldn’t. She’d said yes, when she wanted to say no and had done it anyway. Her mind was reeling.
He took up all the air and space around her and she stopped thinking straight, she needed some distance, some space to think. This was not like her. He might have saved her life but now it belonged to him and she’d let him take it.
Would she have been better off dead?....
She walked holding her head high acknowledging the best wishes of those she passed, numbly knowing they knew of Eldorn’s infidelity only last week. It hurt more than anything. It pained her to see their pitying faces and quickly made her way inside.
Kate joined her as she re-entered the
Keep central courtyard going with her to her rooms taking up a one-sided conversation.
As she entered in a daze, a sight she’d not expected faced her. Shelves and shelves of books. Eleanor blinked slowly not sure she was seeing correctly then focused and raced to them, looking at all the familiar and unexpected books.
She’d wondered if they’d come with her when she recognised the titles and covers of some of them. Others she’d not seen before and excitement thrilled her.
“The Master had this done for you and installed while you were at the wedding breakfast. His gift to you I believe on your wedding.” Eleanor flinched.
“Some of the books come from our own storage, others came with you from your father or he had brought here for you. I have never seen so many books in once place,” Kate told her in wonder.
Eleanor would agree as she excitedly looked from one tome to another. Her father’s study at the castle was just as good as this and his had years in the making. Anytime they came across duplicates, he would pass them on to her and she had collected her own over time too. It felt wonderful to have them around her once more.
Thoughts of Eldron intruding here crept up on her but she pushed them aside. He’d told her nothing needed to change, maybe this was his way of confirming that. Either way, she would need to thank him it was only right.
“Would you help me out of these clothes. I don’t want to wear them any longer.” Kate helped her re-dress in one of her own.
The Barbarian Page 9