by Lowe, Anna
Thirty minutes on the highway and she realized the pain in her stomach was sorrow.
* * *
He read her note. Refused to allow himself to think as he drove home, Rebekah’s breakfast in his hand. He placed it on the table – one of the girls would eat it, and went to his room for clean clothing. When he emerged, Asiane was sitting next to the tray of food, sniffing at it.
“You never eat…” Her voice trailed off as she looked at him. Hard. Then swore. “Goddamn, you slept with her.”
He sat down, staring at the strawberries. They look like tiny little organs floating in congealed blood. “Yes.”
Asiane’s eyes widened. “You always said you wouldn’t give your virginity to a female unless you were mated.”
For a split second he wanted to pounce on his sister. Then he reined himself in. She wasn’t rubbing his vow in his face. He’d enjoyed sexual play with plenty of females since he was an adult, but he had always stopped, not wanting to give that one last thing to some random female. He had little to offer. Despite the success of the business he and Asiane ran, mating him would come with a world of responsibility and even danger. There was little to make up for it, but he could at least promise his mate and wife that he would be faithful. That there were no others to compare her to. That he belonged to her, and her alone.
“Where is she?” Asiane’s voice softened.
“She left.”
His sister rose to her feet, walking an agitated circle around the table. “But… why? She didn’t strike me as shallow. She said-”
“I know what she said.” He withdrew the note from his pocket, placed it on the table.
Asiane snatched it up. “ ‘Daamin, please don’t hate me. I told you when we met I was not free. The truth is, a mating has been arranged for me and I can’t go back on my word. I owe everything to the Den that raised me. I promised you aid, and I will fulfill that promise to the best of my ability. My uncle owes me a favor – I’ll send him to you. I think it’s best if he is your contact. All the best, Rebekah.’ “
Daamin looked up at his sister’s sigh. She didn’t sound surprised. “She told me that first evening. I’d just assumed she wouldn’t be any different to you than any of the other females you dallied with.”
He said nothing. What could he say? The female he’d felt such a strong connection to had walked out on him, had placed duty to her Den over him. Daamin was almost certain she shared the strength of his feelings. It was hard to gauge with humans, but when she looked at him…
Asiane studied him. “You seem… calm.”
He rose. “I know where she is. And who she is. She won’t escape so easily.”
* * *
Rebekah sighed, half listening to Gwenafar’s civilized rant. She’d walked in the door of her apartment only to find her Grandmother sitting at the table, tea, tablet and muffins in front of her.
“Didn’t know you had a key, Grams,” Rebekah said.
The female snorted without looking up. “Of course, I have a key.”
“So tell me what’s going on.”
And then the rant had begun. Rebekah picked at a blueberry-raspberry muffin. “Ok, what do you want me to do? If the guy changed his mind-”
“He needs to meet you. Once you two meet, I’m certain you’ll hit it off.”
“Why are you certain?”
“Liam would like him.”
Rebekah’s eyes narrowed. The answer was evasive. Grandmother was up to something. “How do you know? Just who is this guy, anyway?”
Gwenafar waved a hand. “I have a file, but I thought a blind first date would be more fun.”
“Okaaaay.” Not her idea of fun, but fine. Elders needed their little amusements, after all. “I think it’s time for another tattoo.”
Gwenafar stared at her, distaste flitting across her face. “What? What are you talking about?”
Rebekah shook her head. “Never mind.” She stood up. “Whatever you want, Grams. I need to do some work and then I’m taking an early nap.” The drive had drained her and she was feeling more than a little sleepy.
The older female sniffed as Rebekah passed her. “Who is that scent?”
She hurried into her bedroom and shut the door.
Settling on her bed, she opened her laptop and replied to the email waiting for her. C.C. requesting an earlier meeting than they’d agreed. But this time, she was the one to cancel. No way was she going back to Tacoma right now. Dad would have to handle it. She let him know Liam Conroy would be in touch soon, and sent an email to her Dad updating him on the situation – both work related and personal, and asking for a day off. Then she curled under the covers and went to sleep.
It was the only escape from the gnawing pain she tried to pretend didn’t exist.
* * *
Three fat, pure white candles of varying heights decorated the mantle. Rebekah placed evergreen boughs around them and added little glittery things made of gold. Meredith put finishing touches on the tree. They’d finished decorations at the Conroy house and were now at Alphonso and Tamar’s log ‘cabin’ in the woods. Alphonso wasn’t big on the decorations and left it to the females, and Tamar preferred to cook rather than play with lights and bright colored balls.
Rebekah left the living room and went into the kitchen, drawn by the smell of lasagna. The blend of spicy sauce, three different meats and five cheeses should have made her stomach rumble. But as good as it smelled, she just wasn’t hungry.
Tamar turned her head, pointing to the kitchen table. “Sit. We need to talk.”
Rebekah obeyed, leaning an elbow on the warm wood. “What did I do?”
“You tell me.”
Tamar slipped her hands into two fluffy oven mitts and opened the door, taking the first, then the second, glass pan out of the oven. She adjusted the temperature and timer and in went two sheet pans of rolls. After discarding the mitts and taking a large wooden salad bowl out of the fridge, she sat down, facing Rebekah.
“Talk,” the woman said, staring Rebekah down.
She folded her arms. “About what?”
“Al says you smell like young.”
It took Rebekah a second, then she shook her head. “Hell no, I don’t. I’m on the pill.”
Tamar smiled, leaning back, expression satisfied. “You didn’t deny you met someone.”
Rebekah rolled her eyes. “I meet several someones throughout the course of a year.”
“Not this year, you haven’t. I’ve been watching. You’re around mating age and if you think Gwen isn’t chomping at the bit to get you mated off to some-”
Rebekah coughed. “Well.”
Tamar’s chocolate eyes widened. “I knew it! Have you met him?”
“No. They’re still in talks. He backed out a few weeks ago, but she talked him back into it. He can’t clear his schedule yet, though.” Which would have rankled, except these days she didn’t seem to care about anything but work, and even her interest in that had paled. Rebekah shrugged. “I don’t care. I’m doing it for-”
“If you say for the Clan, I’ll beat your ass, girl. You don’t have to mate for the Clan.”
“What are you talking about?” Meredith asked, entering the kitchen.
“See what you did,” Rebekah said.
Liam had agreed, despite his anger at his mother, to not say anything to Meredith, because that’s how Rebekah wanted it. But the cat would be out of the bag sooner or later.
“Your mother-in-law is trying to mate this girl off and have some new cubs, that’s what.”
“What?” Outraged green eyes tore into Rebekah. “You didn’t tell me? How long has this been going on?”
They argued back and forth for the next several minutes, talking Meredith out of calling Gwenafar and Challenging her to the Circle. She did call her mate, and tore a strip off him. A text pinged her phone as Meredith was yelling.
It was Dad.
Thanks a lot – Dad
Rebekah grinned. She could just i
magine the sourness of his tone.
Hey, can’t you control your mate?
He, of course, had no reply to that.
“That’s not even the worst thing, Mere,” Tamar said, arms folded. Then the oven beeped and she surged out of the chair to grab bread rolls.
Meredith rounded on her best friend. “What else is there?”
“Al says she smells pregnant.”
Meredith stared at Rebekah, then disconnected her call. “Bathroom. Now.”
Rebekah rolled her eyes, unmoving. “What, you think Tamar has a handy stack of tests in her bathroom?”
“Yup,” Tamar said, breaking open a roll and slathering it with butter. “A whole box. Less than a quarter each on the internet. Handy to have around. Do it quick, the kids will be back soon and they are nosy as all get out. And if Al gets confirmation, you know he’s gonna tell Liam. That male don’t know how to keep his mouth shut.”
“Fuck.” Rebekah allowed her foster mother to drag her to the bathroom. “Look, I’m on the pill. There’s no way-”
“Since when have you been on the pill?” Meredith opened the bathroom door, shoved Rebekah inside and followed after her. She crouched down to the cabinet under the sink. “There should be a box and a sleeve of pee cups… here. It’s a strip. Just pee in the cup and dip it for five seconds.”
Humoring Meredith, Rebekah went through the motions, watching in fascination as the tiny little strip of paper turned pink.
“See?” Rebekah said. “Two lines. That’s negative.”
Meredith stared at her, deep green eyes both calculating and mirthful. “Two lines is positive.”
“What? That’s not what the…” she picked up the foil package. “…oh, shit.” Rebekah sat down on the toilet seat, hard. “What the fuck? How the hell did this happen? I’m on the pill.”
“You haven’t mentioned an OB/GYN appointment in over a year.”
“I didn’t need one. I had a leftover pack. I’ve been taking one every day.”
“Rebekah, did you check the expiration date?”
“What? They expire? Since when do pills expire?”
Meredith sighed. “I work with teenagers for a living, and I hold hands every year while girls and boys go through pregnancy scares. There isn’t anything I don’t know about the failure rates of birth control now. Oh, Brick. You are never boring. We’re going to have to tell the male your grandmother has arranged for you. He might not want to go ahead-” she paused. “The father? Is he a Bear?” A lilt at the end of the sentence told Rebekah what Meredith hoped for.
“Yup.”
“Oh, dear god, thank you.” Meredith sat down on the edge of the tub. “That’s the only thing that will keep Gwenafar from throwing a complete fit. A cub. That’s the whole point, after all. Cubs.”
“I’m pregnant.” Rebekah stared at the strip.
Meredith leaned forward and took her hand, squeezing it. “It’s okay, baby. You’re responsible and you have plenty of family. This will be fun, don’t worry.”
Chapter Nine
“She’s agreed to a Solstice mating ceremony,” Gwenafar Conroy said. If any more satisfaction permeated her voice, it would ooze through the cell.
“Fine. Email me the details.”
“Absolutely. Have a good day.”
Daamin disconnected, leaning back in his chair. His office was cramped, dark and windowless, a converted storage room in the converted warehouse he’d turned into an internet studio. There were several stalls including his own that he leased to different online entrepreneurs who’d decorated their sets and filmed for YouTube and other ventures.
His office probably wasn’t anything like Liam Conroy’s. Nor like Cassius’, the millionaire tech genius and mate of his soon to be sister-in-law. He preferred it that way. The family businesses brought in enough income to support them all comfortably, but not enough wealth to attract undue attention. He would have to deal with his Clan at some point – signs that the Daihariin were in town were ever increasing. He knew it was only a matter of time before another attempt was made to snatch one of his sisters and take them back home. The Alpha would never forgive Daamin for stealing three of the Clan’s most desirable females away from them, not to mention the younger girls who would be adults in a handful of years.
Shuffling through his email, he pulled up the file sent him by the Mother’s Council weeks ago, accessing the picture of the mate they’d chosen for him.
Rebekah Conroy. R. Conroy. It was a professional shot, likely a part of her press kit for Liam’s production studio. Hair a loose tail over one shoulder, subtle makeup and a black leather jacket that tried to look like a blazer. A hint of irony in her eyes and the tiny curve of her lips. It screamed rebel to a smart male.
The last few weeks had been a strain. He knew where she was, he wanted to contact her – but then again he didn’t, he wanted to let this charade play out until the end, see what she would choose. Go along with an arranged mating in order to fulfil duty? Or back out and choose him first? Either choice, he was conflicted. On one hand, a female who understood family loyalty and would fight for the good of the Den – that was what he wanted. Needed. But Daamin the male wanted a mate who put him above all others.
Daamin sighed. It was selfish of him, and likely childish as well. Life didn’t always fit easily into pretty little boxes, and whatever choice she made, there would be benefits and repercussions. Except, in this case, she wasn’t aware that duty and heart could merge.
He wasn’t going to tell her. Not yet. Even though Asiane disapproved of the deception. Even though his Bear urged him to go to his female and claim her, and stop playing these mental games with himself.
A knock on his office door and his personal assistant popped his head in. “Daamin, did you want to shoot the episode today? And we still have to review the script Conroy sent us.”
He rose. “Is he still asking that I reveal my identity on the special?”
Logan’s eyes widened. “Of course. And you have to admit, it would be the perfect venue. The amount of traffic driven to the site from being featured… plus once all the ladies see your handsome mug-”
Daamin grimaced. “I’m soon to be mated. And to his daughter.”
Logan stared. “Man, if I didn’t know you, I’d think you were either joking or gone off the deep end.”
They left the office together. “Tell him yes.”
“Hell, yeah. You sure? You’ve been all secret squirrel for two years now.”
Yes, but now he had the backing of an influential Den in a powerful Clan – and the skirmish attacks on the bar made it clear that someone in his enemy’s employ had either guessed or confirmed Jaafir whereabouts already. With the mating would come resources to help him eliminate the danger from old enemies once and for all. If Rebekah didn’t refuse to go through with the ceremony when she saw him.
“I’m sure. It’s a mutual mating present.” His future mate just didn’t know it yet.
* * *
“What do you want to do?” Liam asked her.
They knelt in the backyard winter garden, carefully tending shoots of greens designed to withstand the seasonal cold. A greenhouse covered the plants, protecting them from snowfall that was due any day now.
“I guess I’ll make a doctor appointment,” she said, staring sightlessly at the ground.
He touched her cheek. Rebekah looked up when the pressure increased. “You don’t seem happy about being pregnant,” Dad said. “Do you want the cub? You can always have an abortion.”
Rebekah growled. Fierce denial, the beginning of protective rage rose in her throat. “I would never do that!”
Calm eyes studied her. “I know you won’t. I needed to get a response out of you. You’ve been listless these last few weeks.”
She scowled. “I’ve done my job.”
“Yes. But you don’t seem to take any pleasure out of it anymore. You don’t have to go through with the mating. He might not even want to – now.”
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Rebekah rose, brushing off the knees of her pants. “I don’t really care one way or the other. I’m going to go make tea.”
The water had just come to a boil when Dad entered the kitchen. “That’s the problem, you know. It’s not normal. You’re one of the most anti-apathetic people I know. Rebekah,” his voice gentled. “Have you spoken to the father?”
She filled a strainer with two heaping tablespoons of loose leaf tea, wondering why her vision was blurry. She blinked several times. “No.”
“I think you should, Brick.”
She turned, reluctantly. He only used her nickname when he really, really wanted her attention.
“You know what you look like to me? Like a female who was beginning to bond, and it was cut off too soon. Plus add the hormones from pregnancy… I think you should talk to the father. Is he a good guy?”
The last question was asked all too casually, her Dad leaning against the counter and crossing his arms as if he was trying to portray nonchalance. She eyed him. He was doing pretty good, but he wouldn’t quite meet her eyes – which meant he was holding back the alpha nature to defend and protect. And rend the offending male in question to pieces.
“He takes care of his family. He – I’m pretty sure he has a job of some kind.”
“Well, call him and see what he says about all this. He deserves to know he has a cub. And maybe there’s a happier resolution to all this than mating you off to a stranger – even if he is willing to accept another male’s cub.”
Rebekah thought about it that evening. And thought hard. Daamin hadn’t once talked about mating and long-term commitments, had even said he didn’t want cubs with a female outside of a formal mating, but he’d seemed to like her well enough. And they’d been talking Den ties and all that shifter political stuff. Uncle Boden had agreed to meet with him after the holidays and talk business. The local Den could use new members, or even satellite members to expand their territory. All the Council wanted was for her to mate a Bear and have a cub to strengthen and diversify the genetic lines. Well, she was on her way to doing one-half of that. Why couldn’t she make a permanent commitment with Daamin? If a stranger, why not him? Why had she been assuming the only way to go was to let Grams pick a mate for her?
