It wasn’t easy to keep her anger, frustration, and hurt at bay during the long morning. All aimed at the crazy man she’d married. She closed up a box that contained Keith’s personal effects from his nightstand drawer, once again not coming up with the elusive flash drive. She probably ought to be afraid, but with Lucas by her side, she didn’t allow that emotion to surface. She’d worry about Vincent Bernardi later.
“You know,” she said to Lucas, “I packed Keith’s stuff up for a reason. It’s not like I want to be looking through his papers and personal effects. I was planning to give your mom a key when she was ready and let your parents decide what to keep and what to get rid of.”
Lucas placed a hand over hers. “I’m sorry you have to go through this.”
She smiled wryly. “It’s definitely not your fault. And I appreciate your help.” She didn’t know what she’d have done without him.
“When are you going to realize I’d do anything for you?” he asked.
He’d made that comment at other times in the past, but something in his brown eyes and intense expression was different now. More protective. Possessive.
Before she could figure out what, he continued. “And because I’d do anything for you, I have some things I’d like to talk to you about, and after a morning doing this, you’re not going to like it.”
“Spit it out. I’m not sure there’s much more that can shock me.”
He nodded. “I hired security to protect you. I don’t trust this Bernardi character, and I’m worried about him coming near you again.”
She blew out a long breath. “And you’re expecting me to be upset that you’re making decisions for me or taking over my life?”
“Something like that.”
She stood and walked over to the box on which he sat, rested her head on his shoulder.
Exhaustion overwhelmed her but he was her rock. “I’m not upset. I’m so grateful that you care enough to keep me safe. I can be stubborn but I’m not stupid.”
He laughed and breathed out an obvious sigh of relief. “Well, that went easier than I thought. Next I have to deal with my parents.”
She looked up and met his gaze. “Have you heard from them?”
He shook his head. “But I need to go see them.”
“Okay … they’re your parents. You should visit with them.” But there was something he wasn’t saying. “Lucas, what’s wrong?”
“I hired people to protect them too. What if Bernardi starts to think maybe Keith gave the flash drive to my mother or father for safekeeping? He could go after them.” Lucas clenched his hands into fists.
“Oh my God. Do you think Keith did?” Maxie asked, horrified by the notion.
“Everything inside me wants to say no. He wouldn’t involve my parents, but if you’d asked me six months ago, I wouldn’t have thought he’d involve you.”
He had a point, Maxie thought.
“So I have to go tell them everything. They need to know exactly how bad things were with their son so they can be prepared and safe.”
And after the reaction they’d had about Keith last time Lucas had tried to talk to them, he must be dreading the confrontation.
She cupped his face in her hand. “I’m sorry you have to go through this.”
“It’s definitely not your fault either.” His lips twisted in a wry grin.
“I know your parents aren’t thrilled with us right now, but I’d be happy to go with you. For moral support.”
His eyes glittered with admiration. Considering her freak out after her in-laws had discovered her living with Lucas, she understood his reaction.
“Thank you but I need to do this myself. And it’s not going to be pleasant, so I think you should stay home.”
“I respect that,” she murmured. Everyone had things they needed to accomplish on their own, and just because she was allowing for security and help didn’t mean she’d changed her mind about the need to be independent. She was just taking a few detours on the road to getting there.
They returned to their search for another hour, until finally Lucas spoke from across the unit. “Well, this place seems like a dead end,” Lucas said.
Her stomach flipped, knowing that was not a good thing. “Maybe there is something at your parents’, or what about Keith’s old office?” she asked hopefully.
“It’s been awhile, but we could ask if there were any personal effects they didn’t pass on to you.”
Maxie nodded, grasping on to any hope that they could find what Bernardi wanted and get him out of her life once and for all.
“Are you ready to get out of here? I could stand to eat lunch.”
No sooner had he asked the question than her stomach growled in response.
She laughed. “That answers your question. Just one more thing.” Her gaze fell to the one box she hadn’t opened.
“What’s that?” he asked, his stare following hers.
“It’s got some things in it that were meant for the baby.” She wrapped her arms around herself. “I couldn’t bring myself to part with them, so I hid them in my closet.”
He closed his eyes and shook his head. “Why hide it? I’m almost afraid to ask.”
She swallowed hard. “Keith got rid of anything related to the baby immediately, so I stashed things I couldn’t bear to part with at the bottom of my closet. One night when he was out, I packed it all into a box and put it beneath old sweaters.” She shrugged. “They were the only links I had to the life that grew inside me.”
“Aww. C’mere.” He held out his arms and she walked into them.
When she was enveloped in his embrace and the comforting smell of everything that was Lucas, the pain and sadness that came with the memories weren’t quite as sharp and acute. She rested her head against his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart and letting it soothe her.
“I want to take the box home. If Bernardi comes back, I don’t want anything that has special meaning to be left for him to tear apart.” She tipped her head up and looked at him.
“Whatever you want.”
She smiled. “Thank you.”
He tapped her on the nose. “Thanking me is unnecessary. Let’s get going. I’ll put the box in the car and we can feed you.”
She knew he was deliberately lightening the mood, and she appreciated it. “Me? You’re the one who said you were hungry.” She stepped back, giving him room so he could lift the box.
“And you’re the one with the noisy stomach.”
She couldn’t argue with that. So she pulled out the keys to the unit and locked things up behind them, leaving Keith’s things where they belonged. Unfortunately, his legacy still followed her… and would until she found that flash drive.
Chapter Nine
Lucas pulled up to the standard colonial in a Long Island suburb he’d bought his parents after Blink took off. They’d been hesitant about moving, but their old house was in need of serious repair, and Lucas had talked them into moving. He’d called ahead to make sure they’d both be home, and as he pulled into the driveway, he caught sight of the car idling a few feet away, a man keeping an eye on the house. It wasn’t much, but he had Bernardi’s description. Hopefully he wouldn’t get by the detail.
He rang the doorbell, but when he turned the knob, it opened easily. Something that would change once his parents became aware of the threat.
“Mom? Dad?” Lucas called out as he stepped inside, shut the door, and turned the lock.
“In the kitchen,” his mother replied.
Lucas walked down a short hall and turned into the room. His father sat at the table drinking his coffee. His mother, it seemed, had just poured herself a cup.
“Lucas, can I get you something?”
He shook his head. “I came to talk.”
“Son, I’m not sure this is the right time,” his father said. Obviously he knew the direction of the conversation Lucas wanted to have.
“There’s never going to be a right time, and n
ow it can’t wait.”
“Why?” his mother asked. “Why can’t we leave your brother’s indiscretions in the past?”
His frustration with his parents’ denial grew. “Because they were more than indiscretions,” Lucas said through clenched teeth. “Let me put it to you this way. A guy threatened Maxie if she doesn’t turn over something that Keith had of his. And she doesn’t know what he’s talking about. He already broke into her storage unit and old apartment. And I can’t guarantee he won’t come after you two or break in here looking for it, so I hired protection.”
His mother gasped and his father blanched. He walked over and put an arm around his wife’s shoulders. “Lucas—”
“No joke, Dad. There’s a security guard sitting outside. So if you two don’t want to hear about your angel son, fine. Just make sure you lock the doors and set the alarm.” Lucas dug into his pocket and pulled out a business card. “And if you have a problem, call this number. The guy outside will be here in seconds.” He slapped the card on the table.
He’d done what he could, protected his family despite their stubborn refusal to see the truth.
“Did Keith give you anything for safekeeping?” Lucas asked.
“No,” his father said.
He glanced at his mother, who shook her head, obviously too upset to speak.
“Is there any place Keith could have hidden it here?” he asked.
“Your brother didn’t come out to visit,” his father admitted. “We had to go to the city if we wanted to see him.”
Lucas blew out a frustrated breath. “What about anything odd? Did anyone approach you? A big man who liked to talk a lot?” He described Bernardi in further detail.
“That sounds like the new exterminator,” his mother said. “He showed up one morning and said Ralph, our regular man, was out sick. He talked a lot about his son and how hard it was when a kid was a disappointment.”
Which was how he’d tried to play Lucas, discussing brothers, hoping he’d open up. With his parents, he’d discussed a son. “Did you engage with him?” Lucas asked.
She frowned and shook her head. “He annoyed me, and I cut him off to make a phone call.”
Lucas leaned against the counter. “Did he have free reign of the house after that?”
She nodded. “Exterminators always do.”
“And did you notice anything out of place after he left?”
She pursed her lips and grew quiet, thinking. “Now that you mention it, I had to go into all the rooms he’d been in to shut the lights. Ralph always remembers to do that himself. And there were some open drawers, but I assumed the cleaning lady had been dusting and left them ajar.”
Lucas groaned. So Bernardi had been here and found nothing. Chances were he wouldn’t be back, but security would make sure of it.
“From now on, set the alarm and call me or the security company if something seems out of the ordinary.”
“I will,” his mother said, sounding grateful.
“Fine. I’m going to get going.” Lucas had said all he’d come to say.
He didn’t want to believe his father was choosing sides between his children, but his inability to see the bad in Keith left Lucas feeling less than. Something he was damned tired of dealing with in his life. And something he was long past. Except when it came to his parents.
Lucas turned to leave when his father spoke. “Son… there’s more I need to say.”
Lucas paused mid-step and turned, facing his dad.
He realized his father was still suffering, the lines around his eyes so pronounced. Despite everything, it hurt Lucas to see. He waited for the older man to speak.
“I knew your brother didn’t have your moral fiber. Or mine,” he finally said, the admission taking Lucas by surprise.
His father grabbed on to the back of a chair as he spoke. “We thought Maxie would be a good influence on him. You were in California when they started to date and… we hoped he’d stop looking for more, for better—”
“For what I had? Or wanted?” Lucas asked, unable to hide the bitterness in his tone. “Or was that something you conveniently shut your eyes to as well?”
His father looked away. His mother hadn’t lifted her gaze from her lap. “You were smart. Such a good boy. We knew only great things would come your way. Your brother? He tried too hard, and we thought once you left, he’d mellow out. He always was too competitive.”
Lucas’ mouth turned dry at that convoluted way of seeing the past. “Are you saying I had it easy? I was bullied by Keith and his friends. School was hard because I couldn’t sit still. I was smart but it was too simplistic, too easy. Dropping out wasn’t easy. I felt like a failure, while Keith was the golden boy. Your favorite by far, popular, sports star, and yet there was nothing I could have that he didn’t try to take away. Maxie was his ultimate screw you to me. And you stood by and let it happen because you were more worried about Keith!” Lucas exploded, the words flying from his mouth in a torrent of held-back pain and rage.
“Because if we didn’t, we had to face our failures as parents!” his father exploded in return.
“So instead you sacrificed me.” Lucas felt sick.
Bryce winced. “We didn’t know Keith was so mentally sick or how far he’d go to get what he wanted.”
Maybe you should have paid more attention. Yet despite Lucas’ disappointment in his parents, he couldn’t bring himself to hurt them by saying those thoughts out loud.
“Well, he was sick and he did a lot of damage. Especially to Maxie. And that’s the other reason I came. I’m not sure where things are headed with us, but I know where I want things to go.” And he was bringing her there at her own pace. “But if Maxie and I do end up together, and you can’t give your blessing, you need to say nothing at all. She doesn’t deserve your disapproval. Not after all Keith put her through.” He met his father’s stare with a challenging one of his own.
Let him think about all he’d said today and come to terms. Or not. Nothing would change how Lucas felt about Maxie or what he wanted for their future.
* * *
For the first time since starting work, Maxie called in sick. She woke up queasy, which turned into real nausea. She figured she had picked up a virus similar to the one Lexie had had a week or so before. Instead of pushing herself to try and get into the office, she took the day off.
It didn’t help that she was in a complete panic because, to date, they hadn’t found the USB drive Vincent Bernardi wanted, and she didn’t know if they ever would.
At the thought, she ran for the bathroom and emptied what little she’d been able to eat this morning. She washed up and brushed her teeth, then returned to the family room to rest on the couch.
As for Bernardi, she couldn’t forget him because he was always around. He didn’t approach her, her security guard made certain of that, but she’d noticed him outside her place of work during the day and hanging near their apartment building in the evening. She ran into him at a coffee shop, where he merely nodded at her with a knowing smile. His obvious intent was to let her know he wasn’t going anywhere… and she owed him his property.
While home for the day, she looked through all her personal things again just in case Keith had put the flash drive in, say, her jewelry box, but nothing there.
Before coming home from work, Lucas had gone to meet with Julian Dane, fulfilling his promise to Kade to make sure he steered clear of Kendall. She wondered how that meeting was going. He’d had a lot of stress in his life lately, and she’d done what she could to soothe him at home.
He hadn’t talked much about his conversation with his mother and father, but he wasn’t happy with them. She knew what it was like to be estranged from your parents. Her father had never bothered with her, not even as a child. And she and her mother had so little in common they couldn’t be in the same room without her mother criticizing everything about Maxie’s life. Over time, she’d found it easier not to have much to do with her at all.
But that wasn’t how Lucas lived his life. For all his family’s flaws, he loved them. She hoped that over time they’d accept the truth about Keith and open their hearts to the son they had left.
She shut the television and straightened up the family room, then returned to her bedroom to grab clean pajamas, shower, and change for bed. She’d been sleeping in Lucas’ room and had no desire to change things. She’d grown used to being wrapped in his arms, and she even admitted to herself that he’d done everything in his power to allow her the independence she needed. She wasn’t looking to the future, but now was pretty damned good.
Her gaze fell to the box she’d left in the corner. The baby’s items from the storage unit, a distinct reminder of the past. The painful lump immediately formed in her chest.
Maybe it was time to let these items go. She couldn’t rewind events and change the outcome, and she needed to be able to enjoy the life she’d created and was living now. Every time she caught sight of the box, she was dragged back into suffocating memories. They’d always be with her, but she couldn’t deny that getting rid of the box was a symbol of being ready to move on.
She sat down on the floor and opened the flaps on top. First she pulled out the soft blue blanket with a satin fringe. She rubbed the gentle material against her cheek, closed her eyes, and allowed herself to shed a tear for what she’d lost. And what she decided she’d never have. She couldn’t imagine taking that risk ever again. Not when the agony of the loss was so acute and the spiral of depression had been so deep.
She opened her eyes and folded the blanket. Next came the little bear she’d found in a department store baby department. She touched her nose to the stuffed animal and smiled, putting it on top of the blanket. Next came the mobile. Blue and yellow in color, it had plastic arms from which hung adorable baby sheep. Without batteries, the music didn’t work, but she’d been so excited to use it.
She lifted it into the air, and one arm fell off, revealing a hollow inside. She picked up the piece, intending to insert it back into the main mobile, when a small blue chip fell out of the hollow arm and dropped to the floor.
Going Down Fast (Billionaire Bad Boys Book 2) Page 12
