by Clive Barker
Even during his most despondent meditations at the Pivot pit, Sartori had never felt the emptiness of his condition as acutely as he did now that he was parted from his other. Meeting Gentle in the tower and witnessing the Pivot’s call to Reconciliation, he’d sensed new possibilities in the air: a marriage of self and self which would heal him into wholeness. But Gentle had poured contempt on that vision, preferring his mystif spouse over his brother. Perhaps he’d change his mind now that Pie ‘oh’ pah was dead, but Sartori doubted it. If he were Gentle—and he was—the mystif’s death would be obsessed upon and magnified until such time as it could be revenged. The enmity between them was confirmed. There’d be no reunion.
He shared none of this with Rosengarten, who found him up in the gazebo, guzzling chocolate and musing on his anguish. Nor did he allow Rosengarten to recount the disasters of the night (the generals dead, the army murdered or mutinied) for very long without stopping him. They had plans to lay together, he told the piebald man, and it was little use fretting over what was lost.
“We’re going to go to the Fifth, you and I,” he informed Rosengarten. “We’re going to build a new Yzordderrex.”
It wasn’t often he’d won a response from the man, but he got one now. Rosengarten smiled.
“The Fifth?” he said.
“I knew it many years ago, of course, but by all accounts it’s naked now. The Maestros I knew are dead. Their wisdoms are dishonored. The place is defenseless. We’ll take them with such sways they won’t even know they’ve given up their Dominion until the New Yzordderrex is in their hearts and inviolate.”
Rosengarten made a murmur of approval.
“Make any farewells you have to make,” Sartori said. “And I’ll make mine.”
“We’re going now?”
“Before the fires are out,” the Autarch said.
It was a strange sleep Jude fell into, but she’d traveled in the country of the unconscious often enough to feel unintimidated there. This time she didn’t move from the room in which she lay but luxuriated in its excesses, rising and falling like the veils around the bed, and on the same smoky breeze. Once in a while she heard some sound from the courtyards far below and allowed her eyes to flutter open for the sheer lazy pleasure of closing them again, and once she was woken by the sound of Concupiscentia’s reedy voice as she sang in a distant room. Though the words were incomprehensible, Jude knew it was a lament, full of yearning for things that had passed and could never be again, and she slipped back into sleep with the thought that sad songs were the same in any language, whether Gaelic, Navaho, or Patashoquan. Like the glyph of her body, this melody was essential, a sign that could pass between Dominions.
The music and the scent she lay upon were potent narcotics, and after a few melancholy verses of Concupiscentia’s song she was no longer sure whether she was asleep, and hearing the lament in her dreams, or awake, but freed by Quaisoir’s perfumes and wafted up into the folds of silks above her bed like a dreamer. Whichever it was, she scarcely cared. The sensations were pleasurable, and she’d had too little pleasure of late.
Then came proof that this was indeed a dream. A doleful phantom appeared at the door and stood watching her through the veils. She knew him even before he drew close to the bed. This was not a face she’d thought of much in recent times, so it was somewhat strange that she’d conjured him, but conjure him she had, and there was no denying the erotic charge she felt at his dreamed presence. It was Gentle, perfectly remembered, his expression troubled the way it so often was, his hands stroking the veils as though they were her legs and could be parted with caresses.
“I didn’t think you’d be here,” he said to her. His voice was raw, and his expression as full of loss as Concupiscentia’s song. “When did you come back?”
“A little while ago.”
“You smell so sweet.”
“I bathed.”
“Looking at you like this . . . it makes me wish I could take you with me.”
“Where are you going?”
“Back to the Fifth,” he said. “I’ve come to say goodbye.”
“From such a distance?” she said.
His face broke into an immoderate smile, and she remembered, seeing it, how easy seduction had always been for him: how women had slid their wedding rings off and their knickers down when he shone this way. But why be churlish? This was an erotic whimsy, not a trial. She dreamed that he saw the accusation in her eyes, however, and was begging her forgiveness.
“I know I’ve done you harm,” he said.
“That’s in the past,” she replied magnanimously.
“Looking at you now . . .”
“Don’t be sentimental,” she said. “I don’t want sentiment. I want you here.”
Opening her legs, she let him see the niche she had for him. He didn’t hesitate any longer, but pulled the veil aside and climbed onto the bed, wrenching the robe from her shoulders as he put his mouth against hers. For some reason, she’d conjured him tasting of chocolate. Another oddity, but not one that spoiled his kisses.
She tugged at his clothes, but they were a dream invention: the dark blue fabric of his shirt, its laces and buttons in fetishistic profusion, covered in tiny scales, as though a family of lizards had shed their skins to clothe him.
She was tender from the bath, and when he let his weight descend on her, and began to work his body against hers, the scales pricked her stomach and breasts in the most arousing way. She wrapped her legs around him, and he acceded to her capture, his kisses becoming fiercer by the moment.
“The things we’ve done,” he murmured as she kissed his face. “The things we’ve done. . . .”
Her heart made her mind nimble; it leapt from memory to memory, back to the book she’d found in Estabrook’s flat all those months before—one of Oscar’s gifts from the Dominions—a manual of sexual possibilities that had shocked her at the time. Images of its couplings appeared in her head now: intimacies that were perhaps only possible in the profligacy of sleep, unknitting both male and female and weaving them together again in new and ecstatic combinations. She put her mouth to her dream lover’s ear and whispered to him that she forbade him nothing; that she wanted them to share the most extreme sensations they were capable of inventing. He didn’t grin this time, which pleased her, but raised himself up on his hands, which were plunged into the downy pillows to either side of her head, and looked down at her with some of the same sadness he’d had on his face when he’d first arrived.
“One last time?” he said.
“It doesn’t have to be the last time,” she said. “I can always dream you.”
“And me, you,” he said with the greatest fondness and courtesy.
She reached down between their bodies and slipped off his belt, then pulled his trousers open with some violence, unwilling to be delayed by his buttons. What filled her hand was as silken as the fabric hiding it was rough: still only half engorged, but all the more entertaining for that. She stroked him. He sighed as he bent his head towards her, licking her lips and teeth, letting his chocolate sweetened spittle run off his tongue into her mouth. She raised her hips and moved the groove of her sex against the underside of his erection, wetting it. He started to murmur to her, terms of endearment, she presumed, though—like Concupiscentia’s song—they were in no language she understood. They sounded as sweet as his spittle, however, and lulled her like a cradle song, as though to slip her into a dream within a dream. As her eyes closed she felt him raise his hips, lifting the thickness of his sex from between her labia, and with one thrust, hard enough to stab the breath from her, he entered, droppingdown on top of her as he did so.
The endearments ceased; the kisses too. He put one hand on her brow, his fingers laced into her hair, and the other at her neck, his thumb rubbing her windpipe and coaxing sighs from it. She’d forbidden him nothing and would not rescind that invitation simply because his possession of her was so sudden. Instead, she raised her legs and cross
ed them behind his back, then started to whip him on with insults. Was this the most he could give her, the deepest he could go? He wasn’t hard enough, wasn’t hot enough. She wanted more. His thrusts speeded up, his thumb tightening against her throat, but not so much it kept her from drawing breath and expelling it again in a fresh round of provocations.
“I could fuck you forever,” he said to her, his tone halfway between devotion and threat. “There’s nothing I can’t make you do. There’s nothing I can’t make you say. I could fuck you forever.”
This was not talk she would have welcomed from a flesh-and-blood lover, but in a dream it was arousing. She let him continue in the same mode, opening her arms and legs beneath him, while he recited all that he would do to her, a litany of ambition that matched the rhythm of his hips. The room her dream had raised around them split here and there, and another seeped in through the cracks to occupy the same space: this one darker than Quaisoir’s veil-draped chamber and lit by a fire that blazed off
to her left. Her dream lover didn’t fade, however; he remained with her and in her, more frenzied in his thrusts and promises than ever. She saw him above her as if lit by the same flames that warmed her nakedness, his face knotted and sweaty, his index of desires coming between clenched teeth. She would be his doll, his whore, his wife, his Goddess; he would fill every hole of her, forever and ever: own her, worship her, turn her inside out. Hearing this, she remembered the images in Estabrook’s book again, and the memory made her cells swell as if each was a tiny bud ready to burst, their petals pleasure, their scent the shouts she was making, rising off her to draw fresh adoration from him. It came, cruel and exquisite by turns. One moment he wanted to be her prisoner, bound to her every whim, nourished on her shit and the milk he’d win from her breasts with suckling. The next she was less than the excrement he’d hungered for, and he was her only hope for life. He’d resurrect herwith his fuck. He’d fill her with a fiery stream, till her eyes were washed from her head and she drowned in him. There was more, but her cries of pleasure were mounting with every moment, and she heard less and less. Saw less too, closing her eyes against the mingled rooms, fire-lit and veiled, letting her head fill with the geometries that always attended pleasure, forms like her glyph unraveled and reworked.
And then, just as she was reaching the first of the peaks—a range of stratospheric heights ahead—she felt him shudder and his thrusts stop. She didn’t believe he’d finished, not at first. This was a dream, and she’d conjured him to perform the way actualities never did: to go on when lovers of flesh and blood had spilled their promises and were panting their apologies beside her. He couldn’t desert her now! She opened her eyes. The fire-lit chamber had gone, and the flames in Gentle’s eyes had gone with it. He had already withdrawn, and all she felt between her legs was his fingers, dabbling in the dribble he’d supplied. He looked at her lazily.
“You almost tempt me to stay,” he said. “But I’ve got work to do.”
Work? What work did dreams have besides the dreamer’s commandments?
“Don’t leave,” she demanded.
“I’m done,” he said.
He was getting off the bed. She reached for him, but even in sleep the languor of the pillow was upon her, and he was away between the veils before her fingers came close to catching hold. She sank back in a slow swoon, watching his figure become remoter as the layers of gossamer between them multiplied.
“Stay beautiful,” he told her. “Maybe I’ll come back for you when I’ve built the New Yzordderrex.”
This made little sense to her, but she didn’t care. It was her own wretched invention, and worthless. She let it go, the figure seeming to halt at the door as if for one backward glance, then disappearing altogether. Her mind had no sooner let him slip than it conjured a compensation, however. The veils at the bottom of the bed parted and the many-tailed Concupiscentia appeared, her eyes bright with craving. She didn’t wait for any word to pass between them but crawled up onto the bed, her gaze fixed on Judith’s groin, her bluish tongue flicking as she approached. Jude raised her knees. The creature put her head down and began to lick out what the dream lover had left, her silky palms caressing Jude’s thighs. The sensation soothed her, and she watched through the slits of her drugged eyes as Concupiscentia bathed her clean. Before she’d finished the dream grew dimmer, and the creature was still at its caressing work when another veil descended, this so dense she lost both sight andsensation in its folds.
Four
I
Like galleons turned to the desert wind and in full sail before it, the tents of the Dearthers presented a pretty spectacle from a distance, but Gentle’s admiration turned to awe as the car drew closer and their scale became apparent. They were the height of five-story houses and more, billowing towers of ocher and scarlet fabric, the colors all the more vivid given that the desert floor, which had been sand-colored at the outset, was now almost black, and the heavens they rose against were gray, being the wall between the Second Dominion and the unknown world haunted by Hapexamendios.
Floccus halted the car a quarter of a mile from the perimeter of the encampment. “I should go ahead,” he said, “and explain who we are and what we’re doing here.”
“Make it quick,” Gentle told him.
Floccus was away like a gazelle, over ground that was no longer sand but a flinty carpet of stone shards, like the clippings from some stupendous sculpture. Gentle looked at the mystif, lying in his arms as if in a charmed sleep, its brow innocent of frowns. He stroked its cold cheek.
How many friends and loved ones must he have seen pass away in the two centuries and more of his life on earth? Though he’d wiped those griefs from his conscious mind, could he doubt they’d made their mark, fueling his terror of sickness and hardening his heart over the years? Perhaps he’d always been a philanderer and plagiarist, a master of counterfeited emotion, but was that so surprising in a man who knew in his gut that the drama, however soul-searing, was cyclic? The faces changed and changed, but the story remained essentially the same. As Klein had been fond of pointing out, there was no such thing as originality. It had all been said before, suffered before. If a man knew that, was it any wonder love became mechanical and death just a scene to be shunned? There was no absolute knowledge to be gained from either. Just another ride on the merry-go-round, another blurred scene of faces smiling and faces grieved.
But his feelings for the mystif had been no sham, and with good reason. In Pie’s self-denials (“I’m nothing and nobody,” it had said at the beginning) he’d heard an echo of the anguish he himself felt; and in Pie’s gaze, so heavy with the freight of years, seen a comrade soul who understood the nameless pain he carried. It had stripped him of his shams and chicanery and given him a taste of the Maestro he’d been and might be again. There was good to be done with such power, he now knew: breaches to be healed, rights to be restored, nations to be roused, and hopes reawakened. He needed his inspiration beside him if he was to be a great Reconciler.
“I love you, Pie ‘oh’ pah,” he murmured.
“Gentle.”
The voice was Floccus’, calling him from outside the window.
“I’ve seen Athanasius. He says we’re to come straight in.”
“Good! Good!” Gentle threw open the door.
“Do you want help?”
“No. I’ll carry Pie.” He got out, then reached back into the car and picked up the mystif.
“Gentle, you do understand that this is a sacred place?” Floccus said as he led the way towards the tents.
“No singing, dancing, or farting, huh? Don’t look so pained, Floccus. I understand.”
As they approached, Gentle realized that what he’d taken to be an encampment of closely gathered tents was in fact a continuum, the various pavilions, with their swooping roofs, joined by smaller tents to form a single golden beast of wind and canvas.
Inside its body, the gusts kept everything in motion. Tremors moved through even t
he most tautly erected walls, and in the heights of the roof swaths of fabric whirled like the skirts of dervishes, giving off a constant sigh. There were people up among the folds, some walking on webs of rope as if they were solid board, others sitting in front of immense windows opened in the roof, their faces turned to the wall of the First World as though they anticipated a summons out of that place at any moment. If such a summons came, there’d be no hectic rush. The atmosphere was as measured and soothing as the motion of the dancing sails above.
“Where do we find the doctor?” Gentle asked Floccus.
“There is no doctor,” he replied. “Follow me. We’ve been given a place to lay the mystif down.”
“There must be some kind of medical attendants.”
“There’s fresh water and clothes. Maybe some laudanum and the like. But Pie’s beyond that. The uredo won’t be dislodged with medications. It’s the proximity of the First Dominion that’ll heal it.”
“Then we should go outside right now,” he said. “Get Pie closer to the Erasure.”
“Any closer than this would take more resilience than either you or I possess, Gentle,” Floccus said. “Now follow me, and be respectful of this place.”
He led Gentle through the beast’s tremulous body to a smaller tent, where a dozen plain low beds were set, some occupied, most not. Gentle laid the mystif down in one and proceeded to unbutton its shirt while Floccus went in search of cool water for its now-burning skin and some sustenance for Gentle and himself. While he waited, Gentle examined the spread of the uredo, which was too extensive to be fully examined without stripping Pie completely, which he was loath to do with so many strangers in the vicinity. The mystif had been covetous of its privacy—it had been many weeks before Gentle had glimpsed its beauty naked—and he wanted to respect that modesty, even in Pie’s present condition. In fact, very few of those who passed by even glanced their way, and after a time he began to feel the fear lose its grip on him. There was very little more that he could do. They were at the edge of the known Dominions, where all maps stopped and the enigma of enigmas began. What use was fear in theface of such imponderables? He had to put it aside and proceed with dignity and containment, trusting to the powers that occupied the air here.
