Teetoo stood a short distance from them, and the expressions upon the faces of the two women drew his attention away from his own concerns. He walked over to them, stood beside Alemar and turned his gaze upon her as well.
“Colton has assaulted Pardatha. He has also attacked Seramour. Both times he was unsuccessful in his efforts to capture or kill the heir,” Alemar began. “He almost succeeded in destroying Eleutheria without even sending a single warrior to accomplish that task. Uncle Bristar has already informed us that Silandre, the mountain that sustains the city of Crispen, seethes and broils from within, and that he now fears an assault on his own domain.”
“Yes, dear, this is all true. But the heir still lives, Eleutheria is safe, Pardatha, as far as I know, thrives in the aftermath of Colton’s attack, and Seramour has survived and will soon be as good as new. That leaves unresolved my brother-in-law, Bristar’s homeland. Do you fear an offensive against Crispen? To what purpose?”
“I cannot say, but yes, Elsinestra. I am afraid that Caeltin is preparing to do something terrible in that realm. I have had these dreams, though they occur not only during my sleeping hours. They are like real experiences dancing before my eyes in a macabre and bloodstained way. I cannot see into the future, though it seems as if I am watching things that are yet to be,” Alemar replied.
“What could he possibly want in Crispen?” the Queen asked.
“What did he want in Eleutheria?” Alemar asked. “That did not prevent him from trying to destroy us.”
“He requires no reason, ladies,” Teetoo joined in. “We cannot understand how he thinks. In some cases, it is clear to us what motivates his actions, particularly when it comes to the heir. He must stop the boy from finding the Gem of Eternity! There is no question about that. But, in his effort to bring the world closer to dissolution, we cannot always know why Colton chooses his battles as he does. His power is great despite his recent failures, and he is spreading it in many directions. It is possible that he does not know for certain what he wishes to find in each of his endeavors,” Teetoo said.
The Queen cocked her head to the side. “You speak as if you fear that he has already been victorious,” she commented.
“That he has defeated Premoran, you mean?” Teetoo inquired as he turned toward the Queen.
“Yes. It is at least conceivable that Premoran has prevailed, is it not?” Elsinestra asked.
Teetoo frowned. “More than conceivable, I suppose,” he responded.
“Then let us not speak of the future as if Caeltin were the only one guiding the weave. We must continue to hope,” Elsinestra said.
“I will never cease hoping, my Lady. Not until fact has replaced speculation, and I no longer have reason to wonder,” Teetoo replied.
“Do you have suspicions, Teetoo? Can you sense anything? Would you know if the battle between Premoran and Caeltin has been won or lost?” Alemar asked.
“I am certain that I would feel it. I believe that many of us would know. When the earth is robbed of a great force, whether for good or for evil, it reacts. The weave is altered forever and the cloth must then compensate for the absence of a thread which had been so prevalent in the design theretofore. It would not occur unnoticed. You know what happens when one of the great trees departs,” the Weloh said.
“Yes,” Alemar replied, and she shuddered slightly at the thought.
“So you know that Premoran is alive still! And if he is alive then we have reason to believe he may still prevail,” Elsinestra asserted.
“No more or no less than before. When he went to confront his brother, he himself did not think it would be resolved quickly. They had much to discuss,” Teetoo said.
“Do you think they will actually talk?” Alemar asked.
“They will talk in their own way,” Elsinestra responded before Teetoo had the chance. “I do not know if verbal conversation will be the medium.”
“They are brothers despite their differences. Once, they were close,” Teetoo said, recalling poignantly Premoran’s recollections of his brother before their separation.
“It is hard for me to imagine one so good as he being linked by blood to the Dark Lord,” Alemar said.
“The circle goes around and around, my dear. And it is multidimensional. Where does evil end and goodness begin?” the Queen commented.
Alemar gasped. “Surely you do not believe that they are just differences in extremes?” she asked.
“You misunderstand me, my child. No. They are as opposite as anything could be; pure evil and pure goodness. It is just for the purposes of human understanding that we compare them at all. If we did not weigh one against the other, or see one in its relationship to the other we could not begin to make sense out of their meanings. They are truly of different kinds nevertheless,” Elsinestra responded.
“Colton’s evil is like no other. He is not simply bad, as one might characterize the actions of a spoiled and errant child. Neither is he immoral and cruel like a killer who disregards the value and meaning of life. He is amoral! He thrives outside of our concepts of good and evil. He wants life as we know it to end completely. If one were to characterize him more clearly, one would have to say that he is neither good nor evil at all. He is cruel simply because he has no regard for life, though he does not see his actions in the same light that we do. Cruelty requires malice and forethought, does it not?” Teetoo asked.
“I would think that the definition of ‘cruel’ implies that one enjoys or at least is aware that the actions that one commits are causing pain to someone. The word does suggest that there is evil intention,” Elsinestra said. “So what you are saying is that his behavior is not cruel because he does not intend it to be so?” she asked perplexed.
“In his eyes, what he does is correct. Of course, we see it differently. But then again, the understanding of ethics has always been riddled with issues of perspective. We kill at times to preserve, while he kills to annihilate. Is the act of killing or the taking of life the issue here or is the defining characteristic the purpose?” Teetoo asked.
“You are confusing me,” Alemar said, and she shook her head. “Evil is something tangible to me. I can feel it! And when something is good, I can feel that too.”
“But it is not an object to be looked at and scrutinized as is a rock or a tree,” Teetoo replied. “What is it that you really feel?” he asked.
“I feel the spirit of the earth! I feel the pulse of life!”
“And when you extinguish the life of your enemy to further your purpose, what do you feel?”
“Relief. Accomplishment. Satisfaction,” she said thoughtfully. “But I also feel sorrow.”
“That, my dear Alemar, is the entire difference between the moral person and the immoral person! You think about what you do, and you have reasons for what you do. You are convinced that there is a greater purpose that governs your values, and you try to be consistent in your quest. The immoral person enjoys the pain and misery that he causes, but most importantly, he recognizes that he causes it. Colton cares not about any of this. He is not immoral! He functions outside of this ethical hierarchy, and what he desires is not defined by its relationship to life.”
“I have taken the lives of others many times,” the Princess frowned. “But never frivolously or for sport. I believe that when there was necessity to kill it was to preserve.”
“You are beginning to understand sacrifice, Alemar,” Teetoo said seriously. “And all these words have meanings far greater and deeper than our ability to explain them. We are creatures of feeling and intellect, and we are thus so unique.”
“It has been difficult to suppress my feelings at times though. Life is life, and the taking of it alters the weave for all time, though sometimes it is necessary nonetheless to strike,” Alemar said.
“And now you begin to understand courage too, my Princess,” Teetoo replied.
Alemar bent her graceful head for a moment and considered the Weloh’s words.
“I ha
ve doubts sometimes, Teetoo,” she said sincerely. “I do not make these choices between life and death casually. I must do what I must do, yet I question my prerogative, and I suffer from the weight of the responsibility. Sometimes I wonder if I am worthy of making these decisions.”
“And so the third lesson is learned,” Teetoo replied smiling. “Humility. This is oft times the quality most lacking in people of action, though it completes the ethical triad. Yet, without it courage can be cruel and hard, and sacrifice can be misguided.”
Alemar bowed her chin and considered the ideas Teetoo had just expressed.
“Could you begin to imagine the heart of a person who felt nothing but relief at most at the destruction of life? Our value system is defined by opposites, and it becomes clearer and clearer in relationship to the extremes that it incorporates. Caeltin D’Are Agenathea has only one goal, and everything that lives, be it good or evil, poses an obstacle to it,” Elsinestra said.
“The heir must come to understand these things,” Teetoo said more seriously than before. “He will be taught by Cairn of Thermaye, the scholar that Baladar ‘called’ to Pardatha some time ago. It is crucial that the boy realizes the difference between the evil that thrives among us and that which is totally apart from this world. This understanding will help him to combat it without wasting any of his own vital energy.”
“Cairn is the right man,” Elsinestra replied. “I knew it when I first met him. Though we had little time or opportunity to converse, I have complete confidence in his ability to instruct the boy.”
“Davmiran must also have weapons of another sort if he is to prevail,” Teetoo said. “And he must know how to use them.”
“Robyn dar Tamarand will teach him what he must. That Chosen is stronger than even we imagined,” Elsinestra replied.
Alemar lifted her head abruptly at the mention of Robyn’s name, and both Elsinestra and Teetoo noticed the immediate change in her demeanor.
“They are a good team, the three of them. The warrior woman from Avalain provides the final link in the chain. Filaree is quick and certain in her movements and decisions. They seem quite attuned to one another. I have great faith in their abilities,” Elsinestra continued. “Davmiran responds to them well. They seemed to have formed a strong bond in so short a time. Circumstances forced them to trust one another completely at the onset. They had little time to doubt.”
“I have heard much about the bravery of Filaree of Avalain. Is she all that they say she is?” Alemar questioned.
“All and more, my dear, as are the others. I was impressed with her immediately,” Elsinestra replied. “Perhaps you two will get the chance to meet them all one day. You are much alike.”
“Robyn dar Tamarand and I are already acquainted with one another. He has visited Eleutheria a number of times. It seems that I was the only one who was willing to associate with him,” she recalled. “My brother was mistrustful for so long of anyone and anything from the outside world. He had my father’s ear then, and Robyn was never completely welcome in our land.” Alemar’s eyes were suddenly soft with sorrow. “Had Kalon been able to overcome his suspicions, they probably would have gotten along quite nicely. Despite his obstinacy, his heart was pure. My brother died well, did he not?”
“Quite nobly, I am told. My brother-in-law still speaks of his prowess, and he has never been an elf whose admiration was easily attained. Your brother rests eternally now with my nephew Adain, and all the others whose lives were cut short by our opponent. His name has been recorded in the books of legends, among the other heroes of our race.”
Changing the subject so as not to become too morose, Alemar turned to Teetoo once again.
“Is the Lady Filaree as comely as the rumors suggest?” she asked.
“Her beauty matches her prowess, if that gives you an idea,” Teetoo said. “They are all four a comely group, well suited for the tales that will inevitably rise around them. The Chosen and the Lady make a handsome couple. It is fitting that our heroes bear the qualities that people will respond to.”
“A couple, you say?” Alemar asked tentatively. “I did not know.”
The Princess was looking down at the ground distractedly, while considering the Weloh’s words. A sharp pang of jealously pierced her heart momentarily, and the unbidden emotion made her exceedingly uncomfortable.
“‘Our’ heroes?” Elsinestra questioned Teetoo with a slight smile upon her finely drawn lips. “You just referred to them as ‘our’ heroes.”
“Should I have said ‘your heroes’ instead?” he asked, embarrassed. “I have come to feel very much a part of this world.”
“It is an honor for us all to be accepted by you, Teetoo. We have always felt the bond between us, you and I,” she said, and she reached over and grasped his hand. Shyly, he lifted his face to hers, and with wide open eyes he stared deeply at the Queen. “Have you finally come to realize that your life and your fate cannot be separated from ours any longer?”
“I have known that all along,” he replied. “But now that Premoran is no longer by my side, I realize that there is still so much that I can and want to do here. We have always worked as one, he and I. I often thought my allegiance was to my friend. But now I realize that it is to the earth itself, to my home,” he said softly.
“Your home,” Elsinestra repeated, and she squeezed his fingers.
“When Premoran relinquished the shards to the boy,” he began, remembering the moment, “I recognized how connected we all are. He had spent so long gathering them from each of the departed Lalas, and all of his efforts were not for his sake, but for everyone else’s. I have often felt alone, being the only one of my kind left. But at the moment that he handed Davmiran the pouch, it occurred to me that we are each and everyone of us unique, and therefore in a very important way, the last of our kind. The shards represent what remains, and I represent what remains.”
“There are some moments in each of our lives that bring so much else into focus,” Elsinestra responded. “Once we have lived them, it is hard to remember how we felt before.”
Alemar listened with one ear to the conversation, and it bothered her that she was unable to rid herself of the nagging feelings that accompanied the news about Robyn dar Tamarand. Am I really jealous? she wondered, unaccustomed to emotions of this sort. The thought of him with the Lady Filaree makes me very uncomfortable. Perhaps it is just because he has always been so kind to me, but he is so handsome! Will they marry, I wonder? After all, they are both human. It would not have worked for the two of us anyway. She scoffed at herself. What foolish thoughts. There was never anything between us really. He never looked at me that way. What a fool he would think I am if he ever knew I felt this way. It is better that he love another of his own race.
Elsinestra had walked over to the Princess, and she stood beside her while she pondered these matters. Alemar was so caught up in her own deliberations that she did not even notice the presence of the Queen. She placed her hand upon her shoulder, and Alemar lifted her head, startled.
“Forgive me, Aunt,” Alemar said, blushing. “My mind was elsewhere.”
“No need to apologize, my dear. We all have a lot to think about these days. But, it is now time for us to go. We have so much to do, and the morning hours are already behind us. Come. Let us continue your lessons in the infirmary,” she said, and she took the girl’s hand in her own and began to lead her toward the palace doors. Under her breath, so that Teetoo could not hear her words, she continued to speak. “You may fool a man, but you are not good at concealing your feelings from one of your own sex. Would you like to talk to me about it, Alemar?” she asked. “Though I have no daughter of my own, I am still a mother,” she said sweetly. “And I too am deeply in love.” Alemar’s face colored an even deeper crimson once again at the Queen’s words. Turning to face the Weloh, Elsinestra asked aloud, “Will you assist my husband again today, Teetoo?”
“Yes, your highness. I look forward to it. The busier I am,
the less I think of the loss.”
“We will hear something soon, I am certain,” she replied reassuringly, though the air still hung with doubt. “We expect to see you at dinner tonight. Do not disappoint us, my friend.”
“Until later, then,” he said, and he bowed deeply as the two ladies walked away arm in arm.
Chapter Two
The snow fell heavily upon the already frozen ground and quickly concealed all the signs of his departure. He watched guardedly as each hoof print disappeared behind him. It made him feel as if he had never even been there, and he was disturbed terribly by that thought. The young elf stood up tall in his saddle, twisted his lean body around and looked behind himself, as the snow gathered upon his brow and the wind lashed his face and blew his auburn hair straight out behind his head, exposing his pointed ears.
While the path of his departure vanished even as it was created, his memory of the events of the last few months also began to fade into the recesses of his mind, and he began to believe that what had occurred had merely been a dream that he had just awoken from. Frantically he grasped at the remaining images that danced before his mind’s eye, and he tried desperately to bring them into focus, to crystallize them so that he would not lose them forever, yet he felt them slipping away despite his efforts, leaving him frustrated and discouraged. With a heavy heart, he battled both the harsh elements as well as his ravaged emotions, and he grew more and more disoriented by the second.
It was difficult to see clearly through the heavy clouds of wet, swirling flakes, but his vision was quite keen, and in spite of the veil of white that shrouded him, he could distinguish more than anyone would have supposed. Dalloway squinted his lovely, almond shaped eyes, hoping to catch a final glimpse of the wondrous place he had just left. Even as he did so, he began to forget what he was searching for. He cocked his head to the side in a bewildered manner, and then he shook it back and forth in an effort to clear it of the confusion that was besetting him.
The Shards Page 2
