Mal rushed forward toward us. But Zack’s energy must have helped Becca in her spellcasting, because Mal couldn’t get to us. He bounced off an invisible barrier. It was as if we were in a bubble that protected us. Later, Becca told me that was exactly what she had done with Zack’s help—put a protective spell around me, my family, and Sam.
Mal could only circle us and watch as Sam knelt down next to Anna and me. “What do I do?” he whispered, panicked, as he saw up close how bad Anna looked.
“I think you just have to put your hand on her wound.” I took his little hand in mine and guided it toward the gash in her throat. I didn’t know if it was my hand or Sam’s hand that trembled. Probably both.
It was nothing short of a miracle. I told him to think of making Anna well again, and as soon as his hand touched her throat, the wound closed up. When he took his hand away again, there wasn’t even a scar. There was still a lot of blood, though, so unsurprisingly, when Anna opened her eyes a moment later, she seemed really weak. She looked up at me then at Sam. “What happened?” she whispered.
Sam cried hard, now out of relief. I laughed and cried too.
Anna tried to sit up.
“You had an… accident and lost quite a bit of blood,” I explained. “But you’re all better now, thanks to Sam. How are you feeling?”
“Okay.” She looked around, and her brows knitted together.
Suddenly, her eyes widened, and I followed her gaze. She had spotted Mal. “What’s up with your father?” she asked Sam.
Mal could not get close to us, but he could still talk. “I am still your father, no matter what anyone is trying to tell you, Sam.”
Sam looked around, clearly very uncertain about what to believe.
Mal quickly carried on. “This was a test. And you passed, son. You saved your friend. That’s good. You are worthy of living with me.”
Sam got up. I tried to grab his leg, but I was still holding Anna and couldn’t catch him. “He’s lying, Sam. He isn’t your father. Your father is an archangel called Raphael, a healer from whom you have inherited your powers.”
Sam looked at his hands. He had stopped approaching Mal, so my words must have had an effect on him.
I quickly continued talking. “See that man over there? He is an angel called Zack. He is Mal’s twin.”
“Yes, so I have a twin.” Mal didn’t avert his eyes from Sam, acting as if he wanted to hypnotize the boy. “That doesn’t mean I can’t be your father, right? Don’t listen to them. Come with me.”
Again, he held out his hand.
I cast a desperate look at Becca and Zack. They were holding hands again, a bright light enveloping them.
“Look, Zack is an angel. Can’t you see?” I pointed at him. Sam looked, his eyes wide in awe.
“I am the angel,” Mal countered. “Look.” He spread his wings. I knew his were black because I had seen them before. Now, they were white, though—impressive, big wings. I could see how a witch could be tricked if she’d never had a visit from an angel before. But I had seen real angel wings, and I knew the difference. Zack was always bathed in a bright light that faded into wings. They were… made of light, it seemed. Mal’s were just… feathers. But Sam was impressed. And that had been Mal’s goal.
Drawn by the wings as if they were magnets, Sam walked toward Mal.
“This isn’t your father. Stay back,” I desperately shouted, not knowing how I could convince him.
“It’s not?” Anna asked incredulously.
I looked at Anna. “No. In fact, this is the evil creature that inhabited Marie when she stabbed you. The creature that came out of Marie and nearly killed us.” Sure, it wasn’t the best time to talk about the subject we had thus far avoided, but in my desperation, I hoped that Anna—who had been in the car when all that had happened—would recognize Mal and somehow convince Sam to stay away from him.
Bringing that up was another thing I will reproach myself for every single day for the rest of my life.
The problem with a protective spell was that it didn’t protect people from themselves. Becca could protect us from Mal, but it would be much harder for her to prevent us from going to Mal of our own volition.
It all happened so quickly; I couldn’t act fast enough.
I told Anna that Mal was in fact the evil demon that had harmed us before.
She saw Sam walking toward him.
I would have thought her too weak to jump up, so it took me completely by surprise when she did.
Somehow, she summoned all of her strength in her desire to save Sam. Anna shot up and threw herself between Sam and Mal—outside the invisible protective barrier.
Mal didn’t hesitate for a second. Before anyone could do anything, he pounced on Anna and grabbed her by the throat. His fist shot out and into Anna’s chest. It looked like a ghost hand that slid right through her skin, bones, and flesh.
It didn’t even take him two seconds to rip Anna’s heart right out of her chest.
Sam, shocked, stood still.
I stared at the pulsating, blood-dripping organ in Mal’s hand and slowly got up.
My brain was slow to process what had happened, but I was quick enough to instinctively catch Anna before she hit the ground.
I was not quick enough to grab Mal. It seemed as if the ground opened up and swallowed him in the blink of an eye.
The last thing I saw of Malachriel was his dead, dark eyes and the triumphant expression in them.
Then I looked down at my dead sister in my arms.
20
What happened after was a blur.
I kept insisting that Sam should save Anna. Zack explained again and again that Sam couldn’t help if Anna’s heart was gone, that Anna was… gone. Through my sobs, I heard him say that we needed to go and leave Anna there. When he tried to take my arm and drag me away, it was as though he’d reached me through the fog, and I became lucid again.
“No. No way. I am not leaving her.”
“How would you explain your presence to the police? And the best way to handle this is to place an anonymous 9-1-1 call.”
“No.” My mind still refused to accept the fact that Anna was dead. To me, she was still my vulnerable little sister, and I couldn’t bear the thought of her lying there in the cold sand, all alone.
Becca made the suggestion to protect her with a spell, but Zack pointed out that the police wouldn’t be able to find her or get to her then. They deliberated other options, but I hardly listened.
Sam was completely shell shocked as he stared at Anna. When he started shaking violently, the sound of chattering teeth penetrated through my numbness. There was another child here who needed looking after.
“What about Sam?” I asked quietly.
Becca and Zack immediately stopped talking and looked at me then at the boy.
“He’s in shock,” Zack said. “We have to get him away from here, quickly.”
“The hospital?” Becca asked.
Zack thought for a couple of seconds then shook his head emphatically. “The archangels had a different plan, but I don’t see another option. Sam obviously is a really powerful Nephilim. He needs to be protected, and it would be best if I take him with me.”
“Wait, wait. Take him where?” I asked.
Zack turned his gaze skyward.
“To his father?”
“I imagine Raphael could help the boy, and that would be best. But there must be some reason he has left him here, a reason I’m not aware of, as I’m not aware of the reason he procreated with a human in the first place. I’m not sure it will actually be possible for Sam to meet him. It certainly isn’t up to me. But after what happened, I need to make sure Sam is protected. And I can’t do that here.”
I wanted Sam to be taken care of, and I should have insisted on sending him to a hospital. There was no time for me to ask about specifics. But the questions didn’t come to me until later, anyway: Once he was in Heaven, would he come back? Would he be used by the angels
in this war now that he had chosen “the good side”? How was that any better for him? The truth was that I didn’t think about that—all I thought about was Anna. I had gotten Anna involved in this mess, and now she was dead.
And I clearly wasn’t the only one with self-reproach.
“I’ll stay with Anna.” Becca’s voice sounded firm. I had forgotten she was even there.
Zack looked at her questioningly.
“I will call the police,” she said, “and stay with Anna.”
“But what will you tell them?” Zack asked.
“I’ll tell them that a crazy guy abducted me and forced me to pretend to be a social worker. This guy claimed to be Sam’s father. He made me pick up Sam and Anna and drive here. He killed Anna and abducted Sam. Only the last part is actually a lie.”
“Risky,” Zack pointed out. “What if they don’t believe you and arrest you?”
“I’m willing to take that risk. I’m the one who… who killed her in the first place, even though I was under that demon’s influence. I need to shoulder the blame.” She stood up straight and stared ahead at the lake. “Plus, we have to account for the fact that Donna saw me take the kids.”
“Wait.” I pushed through the fog in my brain. “We were there too. Zack and I. We…” I struggled to form sentences. “We came looking for Sam and then learned that you took Sam and…” A sob stuck in my throat. I couldn’t say her name. “A-A-Anna.”
“Oh.” Becca looked at Zack. “Would it be possible to erase that memory? A really powerful witch could do it. But obviously, if I stay here, I can’t attempt to do that at the same time…”
Zack thought. “Yes, I can arrange that. But why not just erase her memory of you too?”
Becca shook her head. “Won’t work. The police will want to know how the children came to leave Donna’s house. They’ll push for Donna to tell the truth. A spell might not hold. And at worst, they might suspect that Donna was involved. Even if they didn’t, the poor woman will already blame herself as it is. If there’s no explanation for how they left her house…”
“I see what you mean.” Zack nodded. “Nobody would have expected Stella and me to visit Donna. Nobody is going to ask about that. Removing that memory won’t be a problem. I’ll arrange it.”
I couldn’t help but feel bitterness at how readily Zack agreed to make something happen, whereas he always told me he couldn’t. For this, he probably also had to time travel and—
Something in my brain clicked. I wanted to jump up, but I carefully let Anna slide off my lap first. Then I rushed to Zack and took his arm. “Zack. You have to save Anna. Go back in time. Do something. Make it so that my sister can’t die. Please.”
Zack’s face held infinite sadness. He laid his palms on my cheeks, a gesture that only yesterday would have made a whole army of butterflies go wild in my stomach. But I had no reaction now. Maybe I was dead inside.
“Stella, I can’t do that.”
For a moment, I couldn’t speak. Then I laughed—laughter completely devoid of humor. “What—you can prevent apocalypses from happening, but you can’t change the death of a little girl who wasn’t meant to die so young?”
If it was possible, the expression in his eyes got even sadder. “You don’t know that, that she wasn’t meant to die. I can’t interfere.”
“Bullshit.” I took his hands away from my face and grabbed them really tightly. “You interfere all the time.”
“The rules—”
“Break the rules,” I spat at him. “If there has ever been a reason to break the rules, this is it. From what I have gathered so far, you guys break the rules all the time, anyway. Do it now. For Anna.”
Zack shook his head. “I can’t.”
“Damn it, Zack, do this for me!”
He gently pulled his hands from my grip and took a step back. “I am so sorry.” A golden tear rolled from his eye, and he laid a hand over his heart. “You don’t know how sorry.”
“No.” I hardly managed to unclench my jaw enough to get the words out between my teeth. “I am the one who’s sorry. Sorry to have ever let you into my life.”
I stood there, hands balled into fists, nostrils flaring. Every muscle in my body was tense. Zack nodded to Becca then gathered Sam into his arms and… just disappeared.
***
Nobody cared that I had taken the car, that I had taken off with a guy and shirked my responsibilities, or that I hadn’t turned up for my shift at the diner.
Nobody cared about me at all after the police came by to inform my parents of Anna’s death.
That was completely understandable and fine by me. I mostly stayed in my room, sometimes coming down to eat. Family time didn’t exist anymore.
Aunt Jeannie tried to talk to me a couple of times, but I didn’t answer any calls.
Thanksgiving came and went unnoticed in our house. We had absolutely nothing to be thankful for.
After a while, I managed to push my enormous sense of guilt aside because it was selfish. There were others who needed me. Marie, for example. Her sister had died, and her parents were far too bereaved to look after her. But I had to be the stronger older sister for her.
The only person I had actually talked to about all of this was Sarah. Becca’s picture had been in the papers along with the extensive news coverage of the case. Sarah had recognized Becca, of course, and I had told her everything.
Really, everything.
I don’t know if she totally believed me, but she was there for me.
I wasn’t sure what would have happened to me if it weren’t for my best friend’s support and kind words.
Zack crossed my path a couple of times even though I hardly ever went out. He tried to talk to me, but I just ignored him. I acted as though he was a hallucination or something, a voice in my head, exactly like I should have treated him and his crazy angel shit in the first place.
On Christmas Eve, I had the intense urge to go light a candle for Anna. I didn’t know where that came from. My family wasn’t particularly religious, and we didn’t go to church. A couple of months earlier, I had made the acquaintance of Mrs. Mancini, who was active in the Saint Joseph church. I decided I would go there.
There was a sort of altar with lots of lit candles. Spare red candles and matches sat next to it. I went there and prayed to a God I didn’t know particularly well. Mainly, I asked him to bless Anna and make sure she was comfortable and happy, wherever she was. For some reason, this gave me comfort, and I stayed a really long time, until people started coming in for the evening Mass.
When I walked home—I hadn’t taken the car, so it was quite a ways to walk—it started snowing. I wrapped my winter coat tighter around me, but more for the feeling of coziness than cold. I felt kind of… warm, as if a candle was lit inside of me.
I hadn’t felt that peaceful in weeks, and I lifted my head into the soft snowflakes coming down from the clouds in the night sky above. Some snowflakes landed on my eyelashes, making me blink.
A really big one sailed down from high above me. I blinked again. No, it wasn’t a snowflake. It was bigger. Much bigger.
I swallowed hard when I recognized it as an angel.
I fought the impulse to run away in case it turned out to be Zack. Trust him to ruin the first blissful moment I’d had since Anna’s death. But somehow, I knew it wasn’t Zack. It was… smaller.
It was Anna.
She landed right in front of me on the barely snow-covered pavement with a thud.
My lips curved into a smile as I looked around. There were people behind the lit windows in the houses around us, but no one was on the street. Just me and the angel. Anna.
Is this a dream? Did I fall asleep in the church?
“No, you’re not asleep.” Anna giggled. “What do you think of my wings? Aren’t they cool?”
She was still wearing jeans and a pink anorak—it couldn’t have been the same one she had worn on the day of her death, because that one had had a hole in it
. The wings stuck out on her back, through the pink fabric, as though they were merely the latest fashionable accessory with girls her age. Unlike Zack’s, they were small and cute. They just… suited her.
She shook snowflakes off her long blond hair and smiled.
“You…” I gulped. “You’re an angel?”
“Sure.” She sounded proud. “Guardian.”
I rubbed my eyes, kept them closed for a little longer, and opened them.
Anna giggled again. “This is real. Believe me. You of all people, a skeptic?” She rolled her eyes.
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“Oh, never mind.”
I didn’t even care. I so didn’t want to know my role as a reborn Vitrella or my role in the angel-demon wars. I was over it and didn’t want to have anything to do with it.
This was my chance to tell Anna how deeply, deeply sorry I was.
“Anna, I—”
“Yeah, I know. You’re sorry. You feel guilty. But you don’t have to. Really. This isn’t your fault, okay?”
“Well, it kind of —”
“No. Stop, Stella.” Anna interrupted me resolutely. “Get past this. You have to. If not for yourself, then for Marie and Mom and Dad.” A shadow passed over Anna’s beautiful face. “I miss them so much.”
My throat closed up. I didn’t know what to say.
“But I’ve come here to tell you something specific,” Anna said, more cheerful again. “Guess whose guardian I am now?”
I shrugged.
“Sam’s!” She seemed really excited. “It’s an honor and a lot of hard work. He’s a powerful Nephilim.”
“I heard. So Sam isn’t…”
“Dead?” Anna flicked her wrist. “No. He’s hidden somewhere safe, though.”
I smiled. Anna had died protecting Sam, which was probably the reason why she had ascended so fast to angelhood. Now, she got to protect him even in death. I was proud of my little sister, and I told her so.
Wish for Santa: Average Angel Page 11
